It's Complicated
by socks-lost
Summary: Because when you try to move into a different kind of relationship with your best friend things become a little complicated, especially if neither of you know that's what you want. Mild language. Spoilers up to 3x03. COMPLETE.
1. The Breakup

**A/N: **I've been working on this story for a while. This will be a multi-chapter story. Doesn't really have anything to do with the exact events of season three but there will be mentions in this chapter of things that have happened so if you haven't seen any of season three yet then you will probably get spoiled. There is some mild language.

**Disclaimer: **Don't own the characters. Not making money. Etc.

* * *

Jane Rizzoli was late, very, very late. She looked at the ER doctor who flashed his little light pen in her eye for the hundredth time with a disgruntled growl. "You're making me late!"

"For a very important date?" The doctor answered back laughing slightly at his own joke.

Jane rolled her eyes as he put the light pen away. "Yes, actually."

"Hmm." The doctor murmured scribbling something down in the binder in front of him. "You might want to call him and cancel. I want you to get a CAT scan."

"No!" Jane shouted standing a little unsteady on her feet. "You don't understand. He's not the kind of guy you cancel on. He's – he's Casey. And he's a wounded veteran. And he likes me, which if you knew me at all is a freaking hard thing to do. And I promised him I'd be there tonight. So I can't just cancel on him." She took a deep breath. "Look, the guy I was chasing just punched me in the face. I was only out for like a minute tops. I've been through worse. I don't need a scan or whatever else you want me to have. Just give me the AMA papers and I'll be out of your hair."

The doctor dropped his shoulders giving Jane a very stern look over the rim of his reading glasses. "Detective it seems to me that if he truly loves you as you say then he would want you to be healthy and taken care of. He wouldn't want you risking a serious injury for him. Brain traumas can be harmful and I've read your medical history, I'd really feel much more comfortable if you were to have a CAT scan."

"You're not hearing me doctor." Jane said waving her arms around. Her face hurt, she was tired and the longer she had this conversation the longer explanation she had to give Casey. "Give. Me. The. Papers. Or I _will _find some dirt on you or this hospital."

The doctor would have gave a better response but the detective in front of him still had her gun in its holster and the look on her face said she definitely wasn't afraid to use it. Promptly, he shut the binder. "I'll have a nurse bring them in for you."

…

An hour later Jane found herself fluffing her hair getting out of a taxi in front of La Beau Truc, why Casey chose this restaurant was beyond her. She bent over at the knees. The doctor was probably right. She should've cancelled and stayed at the hospital if nothing more than to appease her mother, but she had promised Casey that she would be there. And if there was one thing Jane Rizzoli didn't do, it was break a promise, no matter how honorable the cause was. After getting her vision and balance back she walked into the restaurant trying to ignore the strange looks she was getting. She knew from experience, and Maura's flabbergasted look, that slightly scruffy work attire should not be worn in this particular restaurant, but it wasn't like she had the opportunity to go change. She told the maître d who she was with and followed him to Casey. Her smile widened when she saw the man in question. He was wearing a suit that was most definitely _not _military issue and she decided almost immediately he definitely looked very handsome. She bent down kissing him on the cheek before taking her own seat. "Sorry, I'm late and I uh," She looked down at her attire with a dry laugh. "And I didn't get to change. But I'm here!"

"You are late." Casey said before taking a sip of his wine glass. He looked up at his girlfriend and only then noticed the redness and swelling on the left side of her face. "What happened to you?"

Jane was taken aback by his tone. "I know, and I said I'm sorry. It's nothing." She folded her napkin across her lap smoothing out all the wrinkles.

"Did you have backup with you?"

Jane rolled her eyes already tired of where this conversation was headed. "Yes."

"Well where the hell were they when that happened to you?" He pointed to her face.

"Chasing the other guy."

"What happened?" Casey insisted.

Jane's eyebrows shot up. _Breathe, just breathe. _"It's an ongoing investigation, I'm not at liberty to discuss it."

"I'm your boyfriend."

Jane reached across the table looking for his hand but he pulled back. "Casey, I'm fine." She said as earnestly as possible.

"I love you, Jane." He smiled sadly. "I asked you here because," He pulled a long box from his coat and placed it on the table. "I wanted to ask you to move in with me." He flipped the box open revealing a brand new shiny silver key.

Jane's hand flew over her mouth in surprise. "Oh, Casey."

"It's a big step, but I want you to know what my intentions are." He paused grabbing Jane's hand. His fingers traced over the scars on her palms. They were what he looked at while he finished talking. "I need to know you'll be more careful, that you'll take less risks." Jane was about to agree. It seemed reasonable but before she could say anything he kept talking. "Maybe you'll let the guys take over for you when you go out into the field, maybe make it home for dinner every once in a while." He was grinning now. But Jane, Jane was not.

She pulled her hand away. "I can't do that." He was asking too much of her. Hell, she was here in this stupid restaurant that she hated with a bruised face because she thought this guy loved her. She thought he would take her, self-inflicted gunshot wounds and all. She thought he was different, he had always been different. He was in the army. He knew what it was like, the rush and the bullets. He knew what being a cop meant to her and here he was trying to change the very thing that her entire life centered around? She loved him but if he made her choose it was going to be the job. Always, hands down, every time.

"Jane, it's just a job. It's not like I'm asking you to quit. I'm just suggesting you have normal hours, maybe you take a desk position, slow it down a bit. I want to know that you're safe and," He looked at her hands. "I don't want you to put your life in danger just because you can."

Jane yanked her hands back from his grip and scooted her chair away from the table. "My "job" is who I am. I thought you knew that? I thought you understood that?"

"Jane, the people you help aren't worth your life." His voice dripped with a patronization, like he knew something she didn't know. She'd grown accustomed to it from other people, but never Casey. And that was when she knew that the thing with him was never going to work out because he saw her as an inferior just like every other man she dated, it just took it longer for it to come out of Casey than it did with the others.

"I _really_ can't do this." She shook her head as she stood.

"What do you mean?" Finally, panic started to seep into his voice.

"You're making me choose between you and the job. I pick the job." She threw her napkin on the table and started to leave. She didn't turn back even as she heard Casey calling after her yelling excuses. She didn't look back when she went through the doors or when she got in the taxi. The tears were held in the entire ride as anger masked over the sadness of what she had just done. The taxi stopped right in front of the hospital she had just left. Her head really did hurt and she figured getting that CAT scan was probably more beneficial to her health than drinking the contents of her refrigerator. She got out giving the driver his dues. She walked into the hospital and up to the reception desk. "Hi, I'm Detective Jane Rizzoli, I was just here like an hour and a half ago for a head thing." She pointed to her bruised face. "I'm looking for Dr. Walker."

The receptionist nodded her head with a smile. "I'll let him know you're here."

Jane sat in the waiting room for only a few minutes before Dr. Walker came to get her. "I'm glad you decided to come back Detective. How'd the date go?" He asked pointing to the bed for her to sit on.

"We broke up." Jane said simply her voice sounding much stronger than she felt.

"Oh." He said as he shined the light in her eye again. "I'm going to order you that CAT scan but I'm going to say you have a concussion. I want to keep you here overnight for observation." He folded his binder closed before walking to the door. "I'm sorry to hear about your date but I am glad you came back head injuries can be tricky. I'll have a nurse take you down for the CAT scan when it's ready and I'll have someone bring you an icepack and some pain reliever for your face and head." Then the doctor left.

Jane sighed, scooting further back onto the bed. Her phone vibrated on her hip. It was Casey. Her eyes burned with unshed tears as she turned the phone completely off. A few minutes later a nurse came in taking her away.

It had been two hours. Jane knew that because she'd been checked on twice by the hospital staff to make sure she was still living and breathing. She'd been given some pain relievers, had the scan and taken her shoes and belt off in that time frame. She still kept her phone off not wanting to deal with people. Why couldn't people get it? Everyone acted like she didn't know what her job meant. But she knew, she knew what she signed up for and she signed up anyway. She knew what it meant when she stepped in front of a loaded gun for someone. She knew what it meant when she stuck her neck out there, or walked out on that ledge. She knew. But she did it anyway because she took an oath. She raised her right hand in her full uniform all those years ago and swore to protect and serve the city of Boston. And Casey – he knew what that was like because _he _did it. He took an oath to protect the country and he got seriously injured while doing it. How dare he be the one to talk about dangers and jobs not being worth the ultimate sacrifice? The people that she helped, the people that she brought justice for were worth it. They deserved everything she had in her, because life gave them the short end of the stick and it was her job to at least try to make that stick a little longer for them. She didn't want to die but she wasn't afraid of dying and if that scared people then tough luck. And the way he said that it was just a job like being a homicide detective was the same thing as a chef or a secretary irritated the hell out of her. He had some nerve. She really thought he was different, that he understood what she was about. She really and honestly thought that he _got_ her. She sighed shifting the icepack on her face. Well, there goes another failed relationship because of the job. Why couldn't people just accept her as she was, badge and all? Why did everyone always want to change her? Was she that screwed up, that damaged, _that broken _that loving her meant changing her?

…

Maura Isles walked into the hospital with an overnight bag over her shoulder. Casey had called her to ask her if she would tell Jane he was sorry and he didn't mean to come off sounding the way he did, he really wanted to talk to her when she cooled off. After getting off the phone she called Jane's cell to find out what happened, but it was off. Through some detective work of her own she dropped Jo Friday off at her house, packed a bag of Jane's things and made her way to the hospital. Once she got there her suspicions had been correct. She followed the instructions the nurse gave her to get to her friend's room.

She saw the lanky detective laying on her back with her eyes closed and an icepack on the left side of her face. Maura noticed her shoes were on the floor and her belt which still had her badge and gun attached to it was sitting on the chair beside her bed.

"Maura?" Jane opened her right eye a crack giving the medical examiner a questioning look.

Maura nearly jumped. "I thought you were asleep."

Jane shook her head just slightly careful not to make too many sudden movements. "How'd you find me?" She sat up further on the bed taking the icepack off.

Maura reached for Jane's file at the end of the bed flipping through the pages to read what the doctors had written about her friend. "You're not the only one capable of deductive reasoning."

"I'm not dying, you can stop looking at that." Jane sighed.

"A concussion, definitely not life threatening. You are correct." The medical examiner placed the file back in its allotted space. "Jane." Maura started unsure of what to say next. She would do anything just to make the woman lying in the hospital bed smile. Jane had been smiling a lot recently since she started seeing Casey on a regular basis. But at the moment it was like all the happiness was gone from her face, her body. She looked tired, very, very tired and much older than her thirty-five years.

"Don't, Maura, just…don't." Jane interrupted. She really didn't want to hear it. That was why she didn't call. She didn't want to be around people that wanted to make her happy or smile. She just wanted to be angry and sad and confused and hurt without persecution. She didn't want to hear how she deserved better or any other rainbow and sunshine bullshit people fed the broken hearted to make them feel better. Because it wasn't the truth, it never was.

Maura placed the bag at the foot of Jane's bed. "Well, if you want to get out of those clothes I brought you some pajamas."

"Which ones?"

"Blue plaid pants, fluffy socks and a black BPD t-shirt." Maura answered pulling them from the bag.

"Okay." Jane took the garments from her hands. "Can you get the door and the blinds? I don't feel like walking all the way down the hall to the bathroom." Maura turned to face the now closed door to give Jane some privacy as she changed clothes. She heard the sound of a zipper and the rustle of fabric before Jane spoke. "I'm good."

Maura took a moment to stare at her friend. Her shoulders were sunken bordering on hunched, and her eyes took on a level of sadness that she rarely ever saw. Defeated. The word shocked Maura down to her core. It was not a word that would ever be used to describe the detective. She had never seen Jane Rizzoli give up, never saw her look so down trodden, so…lost. It was almost like in this moment Jane had given up on something, something very, very important. Maura wasn't sure what it was but the decision had been made, she could see it in the darkness of the detective's eyes. She took a steadying breath. "Jane, I know you. This – whatever happened – it's not your fault. So don't be sitting there thinking that it is." Jane didn't say anything nor did she move. Maura took the time to fold Jane's work clothes and sick them in the bag.

"It is though." Jane confessed breaking the silence, her voice was barely a whisper as the words cracked out of her mouth. Maura turned to her friend giving Jane her full undivided attention. "I don't know if I loved him _loved him_, but I could've." She paused. "I just…he's Casey. He's smart and funny and handsome and he _liked_ me and I really liked him. And I thought, I thought I was ready, you know? I really thought it could work." She started playing with the hem of her shirt. "At dinner, he asked me to move in with him and for the first time I wasn't scared of the commitment. But then," Jane gave a dry laugh as she stared at the plaid of her pants. "He wanted me to take less hours, be home for dinner, not go into the field as much. And I just…I can't." She wiped her hand under her nose. Maura handed her a tissue. "He wanted me to choose and I chose the job. I'll always pick the job. Maybe that makes me a bad person. Maybe my priorities are screwy. Maybe I'm just destined to be alone for the rest of my life. I mean if I couldn't make it work with Casey, then really…" She trailed off wadding the tissue in her hands forcing herself not to cry. After all, this was what she wanted. "What is so wrong with me, Maura? Why can't people just love me? Why am I always the one that has to bend? Why is there always a but?" Her voice held a delicate softness of a woman with a broken heart.

"I don't know, Jane. Bad taste in partners?" Jane couldn't help the snort of laughter that came from her chest. Maura dug around once more in the bag before pulling out a pint of ice cream. Jane scooted over to make room on the bed. Maura lay down next to her handing a spoon over and peeling off the lid of the ice cream. "But I do know you're not a bad person. You are one of the bravest, strongest, most loyal people I have ever had the great fortune to meet and know. You deserve better, you deserve someone who will love you unconditionally, job and all." She grabbed Jane's free hand giving it a squeeze before letting go. "Don't give up on love, yet."

Silence fell over the pair once more, each lost in thought while taking small spoonful's of the ice cream. Jane sucked on her spoon letting the coolness fill her mouth. After a moment of deep thought she spoke. "I think I was more in love with the idea of Casey than I was with Casey himself. It feels like I expected so much from him, you know? Like I thought he was perfect or something." She dug her spoon into the ice cream in Maura's hand. "I don't know what I'm saying. It just doesn't hurt as much as I thought it would, I guess, though it still stings like a bitch. Maybe it's because it happened already once. Maybe it's because I'm tired." Jane shrugged sticking the spoon into her mouth again.

"Maybe it's the good company." Maura added with a smile sticking her own spoon in the ice cream.

Jane laughed nudging Maura with her shoulder. "Look at you being funny." Jane took in her clothes, the ice cream and the body next to her. Maura was always walking in when the rest of the world was walking out on her. "You're too good to me, Maur." She said softly.

Maura smiled sadly. "I'm your best friend." She knocked their knees together. "It's a job requirement. Eat your ice cream."

Jane chuckled. "Yes ma'am."

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**A/N: **It was a lot harder than I anticipated writing Jane/Casey so I'm hoping the end of this chapter made up for the slightly ooc Casey. For this story I'm going to say they were dating probably three-four months when this happened. I have the whole story mapped out and four chapters written far. I'll post every few days or so.

Thanks for reading!


	2. Just Keep Breathing

**A/N: **I changed it from Jane/Casey having dated 3-4 months to just two. (Sorry about the excessive use of the word "maybe".) But I do have a question for y'all in the ending author's note.

**Disclaimer:** Don't own the characters. Not making money. ETC.

* * *

Jane was on her stomach on her stupidly uncomfortable couch with a quickly fading icepack over her lower back. _Everything _hurt and for once it had nothing to do with her job. It did, however, have everything to do with a certain tortoise owning medical examiner.

It had been a week since breaking it off with Casey. She was right in the hospital when she told Maura she didn't think she was in love with the soldier. She didn't think she ever was. He was just the best option she had in a long time and if she was being honest her mother was getting to her, wearing down on her nerves. Jane could recite the whole speech by now from memory. It wasn't like she was getting any younger. Most of the people in her graduating class were married with children. Or, she couldn't help but snort remembering the case a while back, dead or in jail. Somewhere down the line she started thinking that maybe her mother was right. Maybe she should get married and do that whole _thing._ But getting married, having kids, the whole picket fence and backyard BBQ's was never really part of her agenda. There were always bigger, more important things to do. Like catching killers and not dying. But now, suddenly, she was thirty-five living in a crappy apartment with nothing but a ragamuffin scruffy dog to greet her when she came home at odd hours. So when Casey showed up, once again out of the blue and totally unannounced, she took it as some sort of sign. They had history together, they'd been talking about getting together for a while so why not?

It worked for a while. It was good, even with his partial paralysis, it was good. It wasn't great but it was good. And Jane convinced herself that good was better than nothing. They dated for a couple months. There were drinks at the robber or pizza at his work desk or the very rare moments of dinner at an actual restaurant. They were both a little afraid of what would happen if they were to go to either of their houses for a late dinner. Work or draining physical therapy sessions often got in the way of anything else. Moving in together would have been ridiculous, she had no idea what he was thinking. Maybe, she thought, he was thinking the same thing as her. That he was getting older and they had chemistry, so why not? But it hadn't worked. It would have never worked because they just weren't meant to be.

The hurt was different this time around and actually didn't really have very much to do with Casey at all. She was just so disappointed in him, in herself, in everything. Would she meet _anyone _that could deal with her life? Her job? Her? Was she just one of those people that were destined to be alone? _That_ was what depressed her the most. _That _was what had taken the wind out of her sails. It wasn't Casey but Maura thought it was so she asked Jane to join her on a run. And Jane, after seeing the bright smile on Maura's face, found herself completely incapable of saying anything but yes. Unfortunately for Jane that one jog led to more yoga which led to "we should run another marathon!" which led to Jane's current predicament.

Every time she moved her shoulder muscles pulled uncomfortably tight. Every time she stood her thighs protested and every time she took a breath or coughed or laughed her abs clenched painfully. Even her toes hurt. Frankie was supposed to come over with ice. She groaned into the pillow. Jane did not remember her couch ever being so uncomfortable. Frankie was right when he said it was just a piece of plywood that didn't deserve to be called a couch.

Finally, Jane heard a knock on her door. With great effort she got up from said horrible couch to look through the peephole. As expected it was Frankie. "Yes." She whispered before opening the door. "Oh thank god." Jane saw Frankie walked past her carrying three bags of ice, stacked one on top of the other. "Take them to the bathroom and dump them in the tub, will you?" She shut the door.

Frankie quirked an eyebrow. "Ice baths, Jane? You haven't had those since field hockey, what's up?"

Jane rolled her eyes. "Just…put them in the bathtub."

"Okay, princess." He knocked the ice around before opening the first bag and dumping its contents in the bathtub.

"I've been running with Maura." Jane confessed. She swallowed hard as she watched the ice fall into the tub with a clank.

Frankie shot her a look over his shoulder. "You hate running."

"No, I don't! Shut up!" She would have given him a nice little shove but that would have required her to move from her spot against the doorframe.

"You could just tell her you need a break."

Then Jane did shove him. "I don't need a break."

"Yeah, okay." Frankie laughed. "You need anything else before I go?" He asked walking back to the front door.

"Nah." Jane gave him a brief hug. "Thanks, little brother." He grinned nodding his head before leaving.

Jane took a deep breath before hobbling back into her room. As quickly as possible she shed her work attire in favor of a sports bra and short running shorts that were reserved for bedtime use only. Going back into the bathroom she stared at the tub in distaste. Frankie was right. She hadn't had an ice bath since high school field hockey. She hated them then and she knew she'd hate them now. But it was the only way to help ease the ache and soreness throughout her body. It was especially necessary since Maura expected her at six AM sharp for another run at the park. Jane bent over turning on the faucet to let water mix with the ice, before turning it back off. With a heavy sigh and a hiss Jane lowered herself into the freezing water.

…

Maura sighed as she began getting Bass' things for his dinner out of the refrigerator. She found herself home alone _again_ on a Friday night. She had gone on a couple more dates with Dennis. But that little romantic venture quickly fizzled out. He left to speak at a convention and she stayed in Boston. That was how it always worked wasn't it? They would always leave and she would always stay in Boston. No one ever picked her. She was never enough to be chosen. Even in school, she had friends but they were always at a distance. She was never the first choice and always the second thought, the apologetic glance back and the awkward pause surrounded by hushed whispers. She came to the conclusion, now at thirty-six, that no one would ever choose her. So she wasn't surprised, or even hurt, when Dennis left. He was a distraction from loneliness at best anyway.

But there was this other part of her that was so utterly confused and it had nothing to do with Dennis or loneliness or anything else of the sort. She did _not_ like feeling confused. Maura started placing things on Bass' placemat. It was Jane or more specifically Casey. He threw a monkey wrench into everything. In the two months that he and Jane dated she saw very little of the detective. Every time Jane said she couldn't come over because she was meeting Casey she felt…something. She couldn't even place what the _something _was. She was never any good with raw human emotion. She could determine though that it wasn't entirely pleasant. Did it even have a name? Maybe it was just uneasiness because Casey had already broken her best friend's heart once. Maybe she would look it up on the internet. She scoffed at the idea. She was a renowned medical examiner and was at a complete loss over something so simplistically complicated as human emotion, it was laughable.

She remembered as a child reading emotion flashcards with her nanny before she was old enough to start school. _This is happy! This is sad! _Even at that young age Maura was unbelievably bored with the game. Looking back, she wished she would've paid more attention, maybe those cards would've come in handy, and maybe she wouldn't be as socially awkward as an adult if she'd studied them better as a child. With a disgruntled groan she sat down on the floor next to Bass. She hated not knowing things. He scooted a little closer. Maura put a hand on his shell gently rubbing back and forth.

She would normally ask Jane this kind of question, but seeing as it concerned her that was absolutely not an option. And going with that line of thinking Angela, Korsak, Frost, and Frankie were also knocked off the list of potential answer givers. Maybe she would call her mother? Maura laughed at the thought. Yes, they had grown closer but still something didn't feel right about asking advice on such a personal matter. At her outburst, Bass stuck his head back in his shell. "Oh, I'm sorry, sweetie." Maura said rubbing his shell a little more. Slowly he stuck his head back out. It almost seemed as if he were giving her a very pointed look. "I'm being ridiculous aren't I?" Maura sighed. Surely, whatever feeling it was it would go away now that Casey was gone, right?

…

The next morning Jane rolled on her back slapping her hand over her screaming alarm clock. If the noise hadn't awoken her the pain shooting in her hand and the barking dog next to her sure would have. With a hearty groan and more effort than she was prepared to give she heaved herself up from the bed and went to her bathroom. Jo Friday followed her until the door shut. Jane heard the pup whine on the other side of the door. "If you hold on…" She mumbled through a mouth full of toothpaste. After her and Jo Friday's morning routine Jane grabbed a bottle of water, her keys, phone and wallet before leaving and locking up her apartment. At 5:50 AM Jane found herself sitting on a park bench half-asleep and sore all over. _Only Maura, _Jane thought throwing her head back, _only Maura could make me do ridiculous things like this willingly. _

Maura stepped out of her car with a smile on her face. She took a deep breath of the muggy, warm Boston air. Running in the morning was definitely her favorite time to run. She could be free and wild. She could sprint or cut through the grass forging a trail in the dew or she could jump over logs and trees and dips in the sidewalk. Mornings were full of promise, liberation and freedom. Trail running in the morning, especially, was one of her favorite activities. That's what she and Jane were going to try that particular morning. She was anxious to see how Jane would take it. They'd never gone trail running together before. It seemed more on Jane's style though. It was a lot rougher and more unpredictable than just running on the paved sidewalk. Speaking of Jane, Maura could see the top of her head on the bench they normally sat on after cooling down. Maura couldn't keep the grin off her face as she tapped the brunette on the shoulder. The detective opened her eyes. "Ready?" Jane nodded standing with a yawn. "We're going to try something new today!"

"Like what?"

"Trail running!" Maura clapped her hands together in excitement.

"Are there even trails out here?" Jane asked disbelievingly.

"Absolutely!"

"And you've run on them before, so we won't get lost?" Maura nodded still smiling. Jane couldn't help the slight grin tugging at her own lips. "Lead the way, Yoda." Maura went through their warm up before starting their actual run like she always did. At the new pace Jane felt her body protest slightly. She felt like her body was an old house just on its last leg, creaking in the wind and about to fall apart.

"Try to keep up, Detective." Maura laughed noticing Jane lagging slightly behind. She slowed down a hare allowing Jane to catch up before veering off into an alcove like tree tunnel that Jane, the home grown Bostonian, never even knew existed.

Jane narrowed her eyes at Maura's back before pushing her body to match the honey-blonde's pace. "You are _so _buying me breakfast after this." Maura grinned wider as she pushed the pace once more to something that was more her speed rather than Jane's. That was also why she loved morning runs with Jane. It was the one thing that she was stronger at than Jane. It was nice being ahead for once. "And I'm getting extra bacon and like four million cups of coffee no matter what you say." Jane huffed pushing more and more.

"I wouldn't think anything less." Maura replied before the run took over. Silence shrouded them as they each got lost in the feel of the uneven dirt beneath their feet and the slightly muggy air.

Jane had no idea how long (or how far) they had run but all she could focus on was breathing. Maybe that was point. To just keep breathing. Maybe that was why people actually liked this sport. She wondered if that was why Maura liked it, she'd have to ask later. Jane could certainly see the appeal. There were no homicides, no family, no failing relationships. She didn't have to be anything out here. She could get lost in the anonymity of it all. She was just a person without a name, without a face, just running and breathing and being. Everything else faded away.

Jane fell behind a fraction once more as they took a tight turn and were faced with another hill. She glanced at Maura who was barely breathing hard. _Someone ate her Wheaties this morning_, Jane thought before looking at the hill they were about to climb. With an inward groan she pushed again trying to get even with Maura._ Just keep breathing, _Jane thought as they raced upwards towards the bright morning light.

* * *

**A/N:** Morning trail runs are actually the best thing ever. Maura's mother: I was talking about Constance, not Hope. I don't think I'll ever bring Hope into the story because that's like a story on it's own and not the point of me writing this. (Although, someone should get on that!)


	3. The Bet

**A/N: **Sorry(?) if you're a Yankees fan.

**Disclaimer: **Don't own the characters and not making money, yo.

* * *

Jane had completely forgotten about her deal with Frankie until she walked into the Dirty Robber behind Frost with a definite hitch to her usual swagger and stride. That was mostly because her ass hurt and she had a crick in her neck from Maura's marathon extravaganza of exercises. That woman had some hold over her. All Maura had to do was smile and Boom! Her wish was Jane's bidding. She just hoped that Maura never told her mother the secret to her magic spell. _That _was all she needed. She looked back at Frankie. He was standing looking all smug and boastful leaning against the bar with a paper bag next to him. She made a face coming to a stop next to him. She wanted to punch the smirk right off his crooked face. "C'mon, Jane! I won the bet fair and square! And I've given you plenty of time to mope over army dude, it's about time I cash in don't you think?" Frankie said laughing. Jane rolled her eyes. He dug into the paper bag pulling out a disgustingly distinguished navy t-shirt from its contents and handed it to Jane.

Jane wrinkled her nose in disgust. "I didn't think you'd actually win." She took the offending item between her index finger and thumb purposefully keeping the object away from her body.

Frost laughed. "Oh c'mon it's not that bad!" But even he didn't believe his own words. Korsak snorted into his scotch. Jane shot them both a glare.

"Go change before I make you do something worse." Frankie told her before ordering his own beer.

With an eye roll and a glare at her brother's back Jane stalked off towards the restroom. The bet had been weeks ago and so much had happened in that time frame that she completely forgot about it. It was their last murder case, before the double homicide. She bet Frankie that the pictures he took of the crowd and around the scene wouldn't get them anywhere in the case because most of the time they didn't. So of course, the one time she had her pride hanging in the balance the pictures turned out to be the thing that broke the case. She closed the stall door and stripped to her bra. With one last disdainful look at the offending navy shirt she slid it over her head and adjusted the garment, tucking it into her slacks. Never again would she underestimate her brother's police skills or his gut. She checked herself out in the dirty mirror with a grimace. The dark blue t-shirt with the giant NY on the front in that god awful Yankee text made her physically lurch. She could literally feel her soul die a little inside. This wasn't just a lost bet this was complete torture, cruel and unusual punishment. Shoulders hunched she pushed through the door holding her clothing in one hand. She could feel eyes boring into her with every step. "Where did you even find this shit?" She asked standing in front of Frankie. She was about to order her beer when Maura suddenly appeared in front of her. "Hey, Maura." She looked back at the bartender.

"I thought you were a Red Sox fan, Jane." Maura said innocently taking a small sip of her wine glass.

Jane did a double take. "Oh my god" She yanked the wine glass from Maura's hand downing the whole thing. "I blame you." She pointed at Frankie. The bartender laughed sliding over her usual. Maura looked at her now empty wine glass in Jane's hand with furrowed eyebrows. Jane rolled her eyes sliding the wine glass back to the bartender who refilled the glass.

The other homicide detectives and Frankie all laughed. "I've got my sources, Jane." Frankie smirked.

With a huff Jane grabbed her beer and Maura's arm stalking off to their usual table. This was going to be a long night.

…

Jane stumbled up the stairs to her apartment with Maura following closely behind her. After putting on the shirt Jane started drinking heavily. Four beers in she started reciting Red Sox statistics and facts about Fenway which lead to four hours' worth of baseball discussions. It was slightly entertaining watching the hardened detectives become glassy eyed and nostalgic over sporting events they had mostly ever seen on TV. It was a fascinating anthropological view on bonding. But now Jane was drunk and Maura had deemed herself the designated driver for her friend. She heard the keys fall from Jane's hand for the third time. Before she could react Jane had already bent down and as she came up smacked her head on the doorknob and fell over with a groan rubbing her head. Maura rolled her eyes and shifted her purse further up her shoulder before bending down to grab Jane's arm. She pulled the lanky woman to her feet and wrapped one arm around Jane's waist for stability before sticking the correct key in the lock.

Jane leaned into Maura just as she was opening the door. She peered at the doctor's face with intrigue and wide eyed wonder, much like a child would stare at something they were completely fascinated with. "You're pretty. Like really pretty. Much prettier than Casey." Jane made a face at the mention of Casey's name.

Maura couldn't help the small smile that came across her face. "And you're drunk. Let's get you inside so you can go to bed." Then she all but drug the detective inside.

Their first stop was the bathroom so Jane could brush her teeth. Maura squeezed some toothpaste onto Jane's brush before handing it over. "Brush."

Jane took the brush. "Bossy." She mumbled under her breath before sticking the toothbrush in her mouth. She could hear a distinct _tsk _from the honey-blond behind her and grinned.

Once in Jane's bedroom Maura had Jane sit on the bed while she rummaged for clothing in the drawers for the both of them. With the garments in hand she pulled the detective, who looked like she was about to fall asleep any second now, to a standing position. The taller woman swayed precariously on her feet, Maura was momentarily glad that she had already taken off her heels just in case Jane did in fact fall. She tugged the Yankees shirt out of the slacks. "Off."

Jane raised a sluggish eyebrow while her body slightly lilted to the left. "Already getting me naked Doctor," She hiccupped. "Maura? I usually wait until at least the third date for that." She laughed at her own joke before tugging the t-shirt over her head. Maura was still stunned by Jane's words and barely noticed the move to get the shirt off her head nearly sent Jane toppling into her nightstand head first. Maura as a reactionary move grabbed the first thing she could to keep Jane from falling over, which happened to be the front of Jane's belt buckle and her hip. Jane blinked a few times throwing the shirt to the side on the floor and put her hands on Maura's shoulder trying to calm her breath. The alcohol knocked her equilibrium completely off balance; it was like she almost nosedived off the side of a cliff rather than faceplant in her own bedroom. Brown eyes met hazel. Only then did Maura realize that she still had one hand on the front of Jane's pants and the other had migrated on her bare side. She shifted her eyes trying to find a place to look that wasn't tan skin and lean muscle and _Jane _and immediately felt a light burn across her face as a blush took over her features.

Jane seemed to sober up a little at Maura's discomfort. "Thanks for not letting me smash my head open, Maur." She said trying to ease the tension. Jane felt her side tingle under Maura's touch. _She has soft hands, _Jane thought, _really soft hands and she smells nice too. _She coughed a little trying to rid her mind of the uncharted and completely not helpful thoughts. Maura moved her hand away from the warmth of Jane's side and then took a step back removing her other hand from the belt. Jane shoved the worn Red Sox t-shirt over her head and gave a self-satisfied smile at the red and blue lettering. She snatched her gun, badge, and phone from her belt and put them on the nightstand before unclasping her belt buckle. She glanced up quickly at Maura just to see what she was doing to find her friend facing the opposite direction. Quickly she changed into the shorts Maura got for her. Jane tapped Maura on the shoulder. "I have clothes on now." She laughed sitting down on the bed suddenly feeling very tired.

Maura turned around. Jane noticed her cheeks were still tinged a faint red. "Is it okay if I stay the night here? I'll sleep on the couch." Maura asked with her face still uncomfortably hot.

Jane smiled softly through a yawn. Maura could be adorable when she was unsure of herself. "Of course you can. Don't be ridiculous, you're _not _sleeping on that couch. There is plenty of room on the bed. Borrow some clothes. I think your toothbrush is still in there," She pointed a finger in the direction of the bathroom. "And if it's not you know where the extras are." Once she was done talking she promptly dropped her head into the pillow.

…

The next morning Jane rolled over in bed with a grumble. She threw her arm over her eyes to block out the light. Her head was pounding and she had to pee but she _did not _want to move. This was the precise reason she didn't like to drink excessively. With a disgruntled sigh she got up from the bed. She noticed her clothes were not on the floor like she remembered them and half her bed smelled like Maura. She briefly wondered where the medical examiner went before making her way into the bathroom.

Maura was in the kitchen making breakfast when she heard Jane rummaging around in her room. She already took Jo Friday for a walk, brought Jane's full trash bag outside to the dumpster, and read the business and arts section respectively in the newspaper. She couldn't help but smile as she placed food on both their plates and filled a coffee cup for Jane while she sipped her own. A few minutes later, as predicted, Jane walked out of the room wearing sunglasses. Maura couldn't help but chuckle lightly at the rumpled t-shirt, crooked shorts, messy hair and dark aviators that the detective donned. "That bad?"

Jane groaned taking a seat across from Maura. She took a sip of her coffee. "Man, that's strong." She smacked her lips together. "You have no idea." She picked up her fork and began eating. "You know," She dropped the shades a tad to peer at Maura. "I'm sorry about last night."

Maura smiled kindly reaching across the table to pat Jane's arm. "It's okay. I learned a lot about baseball." She laughed. "And," she added. "You're not a bad drunk by far. I've seen worse." She patted the skin underneath her affectionately before returning to her own food.

Jane felt her face heat up. "Well, okay then." She took the shades off, flinching slightly at the open brightness in her kitchen. "Oh, speaking of last night, what did you do with that vile shirt I was forced into wearing?"

"It's in your dirty clothes hamper."

Jane's eyebrows shot up. "Ughh. I was just going to throw it away." She took a sip of coffee. "Or burn it."

"Jane." The doctor admonished. "If you don't want it I'll take it with me and the next time I give things to the women's shelter."

Jane shrugged in agreement. "So what are your plans today?"

Maura looked at Jane innocently. "Well I need to go home to spend some quality time with Bass soon." Jane smiled. As much as she gave the medical examiner gruff about the turtle, she had to admit Maura was pretty damn adorable with him. Jane scrunched her eyebrows together. There was that word again, _adorable. _Since when had that word become a thing for her anyway? People don't say their best friends are _adorable. _They say things like dork or nerd, but definitely not cute or adorable. "You're welcome to join me if you like, you can bring Jo too."

"To feed your turtle?" Jane asked a mischievous glint in her eye.

"Tortoise." Maura automatically corrected. "I'm beginning to think you do that just to annoy me."

Jane grinned. "You caught me." She held up her hands in mock defense. "I'd love to watch you feed your African Spurred Tortoise. Let me shower first and then we can go." She stood picking up her empty plate. She leaned down slightly to pick up Maura's plate.

"You know what species Bass is?"

Jane chuckled lightly before nabbing Maura's empty plate. "I'm a detective." She elbowed Maura's arm throwing her a smirk. "I listen."

Maua turned in her chair towards Jane's retreating back. "Now I'm going to expect you to call him a tortoise."

Jane shook her head. "Nah, it's too fun pulling your pigtails." She threw the dishes in the dishwasher. "I'm off to shower and then we can spend all day on this sea creature special you've been waiting all week to watch." Again Maura was left dumbfounded at Jane's knowledge of little things about her.

She looked conspiratorially at Jo Friday. "Your owner is smarter than she lets on."

* * *

**A/N: **I know, I know! That's been like three chapters of exposition and introduction but I promise I'm in the middle of writing some what do they call it, rising action? (I never paid attention in high school/middle school.) My point, it'll start to pick up pace shortly. Also I don't want you to get like scared off or whatever, so I'm just saying, Casey isn't really part of this story anymore. He served his purpose (and so did Dennis.) I originally didn't have them in my plans for this story but I didn't want to just act like it never happened.

Thanks for reading/alerting/favoriting/reviewing/anything I missed-ing!


	4. Sunday Dinner

**A/N:** Not really a fan of this chapter, but it's a nice little segue into the next one. Also just to keep up with the timeline in this fic: it's been two weeks since the first chapter.

**Disclaimer: **Don't own the characters. Not making money. Etc.

* * *

"How do you two expect to find anyone to spend your lives with if you're always spending so much time together?" Angela Rizzoli said walking into Maura's house with an armful of groceries. Jane and Maura had just barely beaten the older woman to Maura's place. Bass had been fed and Maura was just sitting down next to Jane on the couch to watch the sea creature special when Angela's voice came booming through the house.

Jane rolled her eyes giving Maura a look. "You've officially been inducted into the Rizzoli family." She patted the knee next to her. "Now, she's going to set you up on really bad blind dates and bombard you with questions about grandchildren." She smiled as Maura's laughter followed her into the kitchen. "What are you doing here anyway?" She took the bag from her mother with a kiss on the cheek.

"Cooking family dinner." She turned to Maura who just walked into the kitchen. "Speaking of finding someone, do you have a type Maura? Because there's this nice lawyer who keeps coming into the café to buy coffee and I think he'd make a good match for you. He's very handsome."

Jane laughed. "No, Ma."

Maura cocked her head to the side in thought ignoring Jane. "I don't really have a type."

Jane turned to her with an eyebrow raised. "Really?"

"Well what do you look for in a partner?" Angela insisted setting the groceries out on the table.

"Why do you think I have a type?" Maura asked hand on hip and completely ignoring Angela's question.

"Well, there was Giovanni and Tommy, which means you like Italians."

"You dated Tommy?" Angela cut in shock clearly evident in her voice.

Jane snorted and rolled her eyes. "No, but he tried." Maura felt her face flush. "Then there was that Zombie guy, what was his name, Dennis? And Ian. Oh and Garrett. Which gives you a four count for the wild, bad boy types." She smirked continuing to count off on her fingers. "Then there was Slucky, Marfan Man, and what was that yoga guy's name? Slucky is an ass, Marfan man left you in the middle of the date which makes him an ass and stupid. And yoga guy had that dark and handsome thing going for him that we Italians have. So," Jane smirked. "Dr. Isles I'd say you have a type."

Maura narrowed her eyes at her friend. "Fine, but just so you know, you have a very distinguished type also."

Jane raised an eyebrow at her friend. "Do tell." She leaned against the counter crossing her arms clearly daring Maura to continue.

"Special Agent Dean and Lt. Grant are both men of law enforcement agencies. Lt. Col. Casey Jones is an army man. Jorge didn't work for you because in your eyes he was weaker than you. He wasn't strong enough. So Jane," She smiled sweetly at her detective friend who now looked a little shell-shocked. "You also have a type."

"Ugh you both have horrible taste in men!" Angela exclaimed throwing down the rag she was holding.

"I'm not a badge bunny Maura!" Jane hissed ignoring her mother.

"I still don't know what that means." Maura commented pulling things from the bags Angela brought in.

"Say," Angela started coming between them to use the sink to wash off a potato. "Since you're both terrible at picking men for yourselves, what kind of man would you pick for each other? Like personality, looks, that kind of thing?" She turned on the sink to wash the vegetables.

Jane shook her head all laughter and smile gone. Trust her mother to already attempt to set her up with more crap men after just getting out of a relationship. "Ma..."

"Someone strong and brave." Jane's head snapped to Maura's voice. The medical examiner looked deep in thought. "She needs someone who understands her job and the hours. She needs someone with good morals and values, and someone who isn't afraid to push her when she needs to be pushed but knows when to stop."

"Or!" Jane said exaggerating the word. "No one. No muss, no fuss. Besides, my cards are officially off the table, thank you very much." She shoved something in the refrigerator. "I'm so completely done with relationships. I'm already married to work anyway."

Angela pursed her lips trying valiantly not to say anything about Jane's comment. "Your turn." At her daughter's questioning stare she elaborated. "What kind of guy would you pick for Maura?"

Jane rolled her eyes. "Fine, I'll bite." She bit her bottom lip in thought. "Also someone strong, you know, and someone who understands the hours she keeps and the dead people talk. That's another thing. She needs someone who isn't going to try to change her or dumb her down. Someone who will appreciate the little quirks she has and all of the crazy knowledge she has in that brain of hers."

"You two should just date each other." Angela mumbled as she grabbed a cutting board from the cabinet.

"Excuse me?" Jane exclaimed. Did her mother really just say that? Her very _Catholic_ mother?

"People already think you do." Frankie said walking right into the house.

"What people?" Maura furrowed her eyebrows together. Did people really think they were dating?

"Why are you here?" Jane faced her brother giving him a look as he snatched the remote from the couch.

Frankie shrugged. "Family dinner and the game's on."

"Oh what, you don't knock first?"

"Jane?" Maura tried cutting in.

"I knew Ma was here, Maura said we didn't have to knock anymore on family dinner nights because it made it seem so formal."

"Yeah, but it's not the night yet." Her voice trailed off as she saw the white and red uniforms of her favorite team taking the field. "I completely forgot the Sox were playing tonight." She made her way to sit next to Frankie on the couch.

Maura was left standing in the kitchen blinking. "And we lost them both." Maura turned towards Angela. The older woman was slicing up the veggies on the cutting board. "Sometimes it's like I have three sons." Angela laughed.

Maura walked towards her keeping her eyes on Jane and Frankie as they talked about baseball. "Jane can be feminine." She said absently. She was still kind of lost over the whole conversation they were having.

"Oh, I know. She's just always had to be the toughest or the bravest or the first to try something, like she always had to prove herself." Angela sighed wistfully. "I have this thought that maybe if she had a family of her own she wouldn't take so many risks."

"Being a police officer is a very noble profession." Maura said letting her voice drop.

"It's dangerous." Angela said curtly with a sharp stab at a vegetable.

"If it's any consolation, Angela, Jane is very good at what she does. She is one of the bravest and strongest people I've ever met in my life." She placed a reassuring, if tentative, hand on the other woman's arm. This kind of affection was something she was new to and usually only engaged in with Jane. "She knows how much she means to everyone, to you. She knows." They heard cheering from the other room. Maura let her arm fall from Angela's a small smile playing at her lips. She grew up with no one to talk to and now because of a chance meeting in a café she had a family, Sunday dinner, and baseball. She let her mind drift to the night before of slurred words and the debate about designated hitters. She wouldn't ever care for a sport like baseball simply on her own, but now she found herself taping Sports Net on her DVR for Jane or, occasionally, herself and being a sole supporter for all things Red Sox. Maura stood facing the living room where she could see Jane and Frankie glued to the TV. She felt herself smiling again. Most importantly, she had Jane. And that in itself was worth more than all the money in the world. "How can I help?"

Angela smiled knowingly at Maura. "Have you ever made gnocchi?"

…

Hours later with her family finally, finally gone and the dishes in the dishwasher Jane flopped onto the couch next to her best friend. "Do you really think I have that bad of a taste in men?"

Jane laughed at the question knowing that Maura had probably stuck it away in a corner of her mind for when they were alone. "I think," She paused trying to pick her words carefully. "When you hang around riff raff like me, you get riff raff to choose from." Maura quirked an eyebrow clearly not understanding. "For example, you'd have never met Slucky if it wasn't for me, or Tommy, or Giovanni. Garrett seemed like a good match for you until later in life when he made some…unfortunate…choices." Jane said struggling to find the words that were least offensive.

"You're not 'riff raff' Jane." Maura said quietly taking a sip of her wine.

"Yeah, well, tell that to my mother. She wants me to wear dresses and heels and lots of makeup at work." She laughed as she brought her beer to her mouth. "I can't chase a suspect down in heels and a dress."

"She just wants –"

"Me to be taken care of, I know." Jane rolled her eyes placing her beer on the coaster in front of her. "She thinks if I had a man to take care of me I'd take less risks or quit my job to be a housewife and raise twenty kids or something. Trust me," She glanced at Maura before turning back to the TV that was now turned off. "I've had this conversation a million times with my mother." She crossed her legs and arms. "I tried going down that road, more than once and I just can't. I'm not wired right or something. She doesn't understand that's not who I am. All the guys I date get scared when they realize I have bigger balls than they do or they want me to stop doing what I love. Like Casey. I don't need someone waiting at home with a police scanner wanting to know if I'm alive just because I'm five minutes late to dinner. No, thank you."

"Well, what do you want in a mate?" Maura inquired bringing her legs underneath her on the couch and facing Jane.

Jane sighed. "No one." She shrugged again. Maura took in the excessive movement Jane had been making all night. It was clearly an uncomfortable topic for her friend, but before she could change the subject Jane continued. "Someone who understands why my job is so damn important to me and like you said, someone who knows when to push and when to stop. It'd be really nice to find someone who wasn't totally shocked on the off chance I _might _happen to wear a dress or makeup when we go out on a date." She bit her lip. "Someone I could be just Jane with would be good too. You know, not Jane Rizzoli the badass, or Detective Rizzoli, or any other dumb nickname that I've got, just Jane with no expectations or anything and they still see me as a capable person afterwards." She shrugged leaning forward to grab the remote with one hand and her beer with the other. "Too bad that doesn't exist." She took a drink of her beer. "Did you DVR that sea animal show?"

Maura smiled. That was a typical Jane way to end a conversation, just completely change the subject. "Yes."

"You want to watch it?" Jane asked with a small laugh as she flipped through the things in Maura's DVR box. She heard Maura murmur an agreement and pressed play on the show. All of the usual suspects were in the lineup along with some sports center for her. Maura almost always had Sports Center in her DVR for her to watch. Just as she was about to press play on the show something further down the list caught her eye. "Scooby Doo? Maura, really?"

Maura shrugged. "One of the other detectives called me Velma in the crime lab the other day. He and his partner started laughing and talking amongst themselves. They were arguing over if you or Detective Frost would be considered Fred of Daphne. I was very confused, usually you're the only one who gives me nicknames. So I looked it up."

"Who?" Jane demanded anger flashing briefly through her eyes and voice. "Wait, you've never seen Scooby Doo before?"

"I'm not saying, but it's a nice, fun show. So I DVR it now."

Jane laughed. "I can't believe you've never seen Scooby Doo." She picked up the remote then looked at Maura. The other woman was staring at the dark liquid in her wine glass clearly lost in some sort of thought. Jane nudged her with her elbow. "If it makes you feel any better, Velma was always my favorite." Their eyes met. "And you're more of a mix of her and Daphne."

"Why was she your favorite?"

"She never gave in to peer pressure. She always stayed true to who she really was. She was the smartest one of the group. If she wasn't there to do the science they wouldn't ever solve the mystery." She shifted her place on the couch.

Maura poked her on the knee. "You kind of remind me of Shaggy."

Jane's jaw dropped. "I'm offended." She shoved her thumb into her chest. "I am _not _afraid. Of anything. _Especially _mysteries."

Maura laughed. "No, not in that way. You're similar in the fact that you're both loyal to a fault and even if you are scared you do what needs to be done." There was a pause. "And you have a dog." She added as an afterthought.

"Then I am less offended." They both broke into a fit of laughter. "Look Bass is here." Jane said after a moment pointing to the large reptile on the floor. "He wants to watch his brethren on that show so if we're ready, let's do this." Jane picked up the remote and hit the play button.

"Jane, Bass doesn't live in the ocean. That is why he's a –"

"Tortoise and not a turtle. I know."

Silence fell over them as the show began.

* * *

**A/N: **Scooby Doo reference(!) FTW! Sorry about another slow chapter. Like I said stuff will happen soon. Thanks for sticking with me!

Thanks for reading/reviewing etc.!


	5. Morning Routines and Murder

**A/N: **One: I know I just updated like last night but I just finished writing this and I wanted to go ahead and post it because I plan on having chapter six up by like Wednesday/Thursday. Two: Sorry it's so long (but not really.)

**Disclaimer: **Don't own the characters. Not making money. ETC.

* * *

Jane was startled awake by a sharp ringing. She jerked nearly sending herself flying over some sort of edge before a surprisingly strong arm flung around her to stop her. Jane settled back into her position. She didn't even care who the person was or where she was for that matter. She just knew she was so totally comfortable and blissfully unaware of anything other than her heavy eyelids. Her head rested on something firm yet soft and the warmth that was radiating from said person was enough to loll her back into the land of fluffiness and clouds and much needed sleep. But then another ring rang out in the quiet interrupting her quest for sleep once again. She heard movement and then the ever formal yet slightly sleepy voice of her best friend. "Dr. Isles."

Jane gave a yawn before reaching for her own phone which was still ringing. "Rizzoli." Her voice was not nearly as fine-tuned in the morning as Maura's. It always took on a rougher, deeper, more uneven tone than usual. She hated it. She always had. Her voice made her sound like a man or a smoker or a person who constantly had a bad cold. She listened to the voice on the other end. There was a murder and it was officially Monday. She heard Maura hang up her phone and felt her head slide down from Maura's abdomen to her thighs as the other woman sat up on the couch.

"Jane, we need to go." She reached a hand down absently stroking Jane's wild hair.

Jane shook her head burying her head deeper in Maura's lap. "Don't wanna."

Jane couldn't help the grin on her face as she heard Maura's deep laugh. Jane was convinced when Maura laughed a real deep laugh like that it could make even the grumpiest of people smile. At least that was her experience when she was in one of her moods. Maura could always bring her out of it. "We haven't had a case in a while, Jane. C'mon. Up, up." Maura gently nudged Jane as she spoke.

With a heavy sigh, Jane sat up from Maura's lap. They often fell asleep together in one of their beds or the couch but never had they slept on each other. It was strange and far too early to question why. She blinked rubbing her eyes. "Sleeps never murder." She blinked at Maura's blank stare. "Crime never murders." She yawned, giving up on whatever she was trying to say. "It's too early." She groaned falling into Maura's shoulder. "Why is it always early?"

Maura laughed again. This, sleepy smiling laughing Jane was always her favorite. She knew how few people got to see this part of the steadfast detective. She patted the knee next to her. "I'll make us some coffee."

Jane gave a dry "Yay!" in response before standing slightly unsteady on her feet and walking towards the guest bathroom as Maura walked in the opposite direction towards the master bath. Again, there was a vaguely strange notion of something very domestic about having a morning routine with someone else. It was something that took time to develop, to get over the awkwardness and the bumping into each other in a half asleep haze. But now it was second nature, easy. Jane hopped into the shower thankful to have clothes and a small amount of toiletries in Maura's guest bedroom. She let the hot water ease her weary, half asleep mind into a fully cognizant awareness that she needed to perform her duties. Not even ten minutes later she was coming out of the guest room fully dressed in her suit with nearly dried hair and shoes on. With a sigh she started the coffee maker before flopping herself down at the kitchen table.

Maura walked down the stairs from her room a few minutes after her detective friend. She had been the Chief Medical Examiner long enough to know how to shower and dress quickly. It was why she preferred to set her outfits out the night before. The smell of coffee got stronger and stronger the further she got to the bottom of the stairs. She paused at the bottom of the stairs to watch Jane. The taller woman was dancing, swaying her hips back and forth, while humming to nonexistent music. Maura found herself grinning. "How much coffee have you had already, Jane?"

Jane turned to Maura grinning through the car keys she had stuck in her mouth. "Half a cup." She mumbled before handing one of the to-go cups to Maura.

Instead of taking the cup, Maura grabbed the keys from her friend's mouth. "Really, Jane, that's not sanitary." Jane shrugged taking a swallow of her own coffee. She put the keys on the counter before walking to her refrigerator. She pulled out a tub of leafy greens and set them on Bass' placemat. Jane stood the whole time nursing her coffee and staring at Maura. It was a thing she did a lot: staring at Maura. The other woman was a complete mystery and yet an open book. She never met anyone else that could straddle that line so well until Maura. She watched as Maura softly patted Bass' shell and whispered something to him. At first Maura having a turtle seemed so odd to Jane, but now that she knew the doctor better it made perfect sense. Maura had been left or rejected or both too many times for Jane's liking and Bass could potentially outlive them all. It just made sense. There was also the fact that Maura owned a turtle and not a normal pet like a dog or a cat or a fish. It was all just so _Maura. _"You ready?" Jane nodded her head jumping out of her reverie. She followed Maura out the door.

…

"'Bout time you got here Rizzoli." One of the perimeter officers joked as Jane and Maura walked onto the scene. "Good morning Dr. Isles." He nodded his head.

"Can it Tom." Jane said lightly smacking his shoulder. Jane adjusted her gun and badge on her hip. "Rizzoli, Victor 825." She knew Tom had memorized her number but saying it aloud as she ducked under the yellow crime scene tape had become a habit she couldn't quite break.

Maura walked behind her with her crime scene kit in hand. "Good Morning, Officer Howard." She smiled kindly at the man before reaching for her badge and clipping it to her blazer. "Maura Isles, Chief Medical Examiner." She took a step forward and walked under the tape that Jane had been holding up for her.

Frost and Korsak fell in step with the duo as they walked to the body. As Maura kneeled down and put her gloves on to examine the body Frost started talking. "The guy doesn't have a wallet, but the car," Frost pointed at the black and definitely shiny Mercedes. "Is registered to a John Douglas."

"Looks like a robbery, Jane." Korsak commented quietly taking a sip of his coffee. "Frost and I will go talk to the crowd, see if we can find a witness."

Jane nodded her head before looking around the crime scene. She briefly wondered what it said about her that this was comfortable, almost homely in a strange sense. She squatted down next to Maura pulling her own gloves on. "Looks like he was shot." She deadpanned to her friend taking in the bloodstained white button up shirt and the rumpled blazer. She eyed the gunshot wound. "Looks like a thirty-eight." She ignored the look Maura gave her for the guess with a small smile on her face. "Struggle?"

Maura hummed. "It appears so. I'll know more when I get him back to the lab." Jane nodded.

"Hey, Jane." Frost yelled waving her over. Jane stood from her squat briefly glancing at Maura before walking towards her partner. "This is the guy who called it in." He pointed to a man who looked as if he had seen better mornings.

"Yeah." The man mumbled running a hand over his face. "I was going in to work and I usually stop at the dinner right there," He pointed to the dinner in question which was right next to the victim's car. "Then I – I saw him just lyin' there." He mumbled shaking his head with a hand over his mouth. Death wasn't normal for most people, and it certainly wasn't normal for this guy. She reached into her pocket about to take out her card when she heard commotion coming from her left.

Someone was running through the crime scene tape ducking all the officers as they tried to catch him. It happened faster than Jane could even send the signal to her feet to move from where she was. The man was screaming something she couldn't quite understand but then he was there. He shoved Maura to the ground and Jane was moving, sprinting, with rage in her eyes. Jane grabbed the man from where he was leaning down over the body before he could even touch the dead mad and potential trash their entire scene. She shoved him into the car. Hard. She yanked his hands behind his back and cuffed him. "You're under arrest." She growled. Jane shoved the man off on Frost. "I want his ass in interrogation by the time I get to the precinct." Frost gulped nodding his head. She could already see Korsak running off to have words with the perimeter cops. Jane took a deep breath trying to reign in her temper before turning to Maura who was still on the ground with a hand to the back of her head. "Maura?" She grabbed Maura's hand pulling her into a sitting position. She threw her keys at one of the crime scene guys. "In the trunk of my car there's a first aid kit. Get it."

"Jane, I'm fine really." Maura mumbled leaning into the detective.

"Yeah, tell that to the egg sized knot on the back of your head." The crime scene tech came back with the bag. Jane let Maura lean into her as she dug around for an icepack.

"Jane, I think my dress is ripped." She looked down at her right hip fingering a small hole and frayed fabric. "It is."

"I have some clothes at the precinct you can change into, when we get there." Korsak handed her his blazer. "Here put this on." She wrapped the jacket around Maura before helping her stand. The doctor was just slightly unsteady on her feet. Jane wrapped an arm around her waist to keep her balanced.

Maura pulled away just slightly to grip Jane's bicep. Really, she was fine, a little dizzy, but fine. She had fallen off of horses before, been dropped my people in ballet class, she was a durable person and she was the boss. She needed to instill confidence in her employees that she wasn't going to die or cry like a baby just because she got knocked down. She turned to her people. "You can take the body down to the morgue, now. I'm through processing the scene." No one moved or said anything. She let go of Jane's arm. "That wasn't a question, I want the body in my morgue by the time I get there." The scene seemed to jolt back to life as officers and medical examiner employees alike went back to work. She turned slowly on her heel making her way to Jane's squad car. People parted like the red sea. Jane bit her lip trying to keep the grin off her face. There was a reason Maura was the Chief. She always secretly loved it when Maura went into Super Boss mode. It was funny watching grown men and women cower under her penetrating stare. She gathered up her first aid kit and Maura's bag before following the doctor back to her car.

…

"Really, Jane, I'm fine." Maura insisted for the umpteenth time. She sat on the benches in the locker room of the division one precinct as Jane pulled a suit from her locker. Maura didn't even know the place existed, much less that Jane used a locker or even stored extra clothes in one. It almost seemed very un-Jane-like, not that she was complaining. She normally kept a spare clothing selection in her office but she had to use her spare because of a lab accident and was too busy to replenish it with another set.

"Maura, he _slammed _you to the ground. Going full speed." She took the plastic wrapping off the clothes. "I heard your head hit the concrete. You really should go to the hospital, but I know better than to ask. So just…" She paused looking at her friend's slightly mussed up hair from where the icepack had been. "Let me take care of you." She nodded her head pulling Korsak's blazer from Maura's shoulders.

"I didn't know you dry cleaned your clothes." Maura commented after seeing the dry clean bag fall to the floor.

"I don't normally, but sometimes it's the only way to get the smell out of them." Jane shrugged. "I get a discount for being a cop."

Maura took the clothes hanging them slightly on the locker while Jane turned around to give her some privacy. She heard the sound of a zipper and bare feet walking on the floor. She tried not to think of the fact that Maura was practically naked behind her. That wasn't normal, was it? To be hyperaware of the fact that her best friend was in her underwear behind her? She bit her bottom lip. She was just high strung. Things could have turned out a lot differently, it could've been worse, a lot worse. She was probably just grateful that Maura was okay. "It's good that we're about the same size, but you're really tall." Jane turned around to find a fully clothed Maura Isles staring at pant legs that were a few inches too long and sleeves that if they weren't cuffed and rolled would've surely landed somewhere past her fingertips. Maura bent down to slip her heels back on her feet. "I feel very…intimidating." She tugged the blazer forward giving a no nonsense nod to Jane. She cracked a grin at her friend who hadn't laughed or smiled since the car ride that morning. "Maybe I should wear suits more often."

Jane laughed. Maura smiled, mission: accomplished. "Maybe, I think I'm rubbing off on you."

"Oh! Does that mean I'm rubbing off on you too?" She raised an eyebrow.

"I do like your fancy pants coffee now and I eat more vegetables." She smoothed the collar of the white shirt near Maura's neck.

"Does that mean that you'll start wearing dresses more?" Maura asked a mischievous glint in her eye.

"Not a chance." Jane said with a laugh.

It was Maura's turn to laugh. "I didn't think so."

There was a pause in conversation while Maura put her dress on the hanger Jane's clothes previously occupied. "You look good in my clothes." Jane closed her eyes as her face heated up. Where the hell did that come from? She missed the big smile Maura shot her. Coffee, she needed more coffee and probably something to eat. She cleared her throat turning away from Maura and towards the door. "C'mon we got a case to solve."

Maura nodded her head. "Right, work." She had no idea why Jane's words sent a shiver down her spine. No idea why this overprotective, territorial Jane didn't make her uncomfortable. All her life when people tried to point her in one direction or the other, when they told her what to do or what to wear, she always had a need to go the other way, to turn left when people said to turn right. It was how she got to where she was today. Most people whether good intentioned or not had no idea what they were talking about. But with Jane it was different. Jane always had a special place in her life, even when they weren't very close. They were attracted to each other like the opposite ends of magnets. They had a strange bond. Neither were people that bent to others but they would find small ways to bend for each other. She let the thought settle in her mind as she followed Jane out of the door and into the elevator.

"I can't believe you're working through a head injury." Jane crossed her arms as the elevator door closed. "You should be in bed resting."

Maura rolled her eyes, crossing her own arms. "Jane."

The detective shrugged. "I'm just saying."

"And I'm just saying," Maura countered. "I've seen you work through death threats, without sleep or food, sometimes both, and numerous small injuries some of which were broken bones. If I really thought my health was in any kind of jeopardy I would call in Pike to do the autopsy and go home. But seeing as I am perfectly fine except a small bruise on my occipital bone that seems unnecessary." She paused. "Plus, every time Pike comes here he reorganizes all of my things and it takes too long to put everything back to where I had it." Jane snorted. The elevator doors opened to the morgue. Maura reached over unraveling Jane's arms to give her hand a squeeze. "I'm fine, I promise. If it makes you feel any better you can bring me lunch and I'll call you if I start to feel bad. Now, go do what you do best." She gave Jane a sweet smile before stepping out of the elevator.

"Call me?" Jane asked trying to keep the fear from her voice.

"Absolutely." Maura answered with a small nod.

With a groan Jane pushed the button for the homicide floor. She rubbed her hand over her tired face. It wasn't even ten yet and she'd already seen enough excitement for one day. She squared her shoulders as the elevator dung and then stepped out. She looked at Frost. "You get anything out of him yet?"

He shook his head. "No. Korsak was just telling the Lieu what happened at the scene today with the doc." Jane nodded her head. She took her blazer off placing it on the back of her chair. She dug through one of her drawers coming up with a granola bar that she didn't dare look at the expiration date on. She took a bite and immediately regretted it before throwing the half-wrapped abomination in the trash and spitting the partial piece in her mouth in after it. She vaguely heard a quiet _tsk _from the meanest childhood nun that had taken resident in her office. She rolled her eyes, but refrained from saying anything. The precinct used to be her sanctuary, her safe place, but now everyone and their damn dog was coming in and making it theirs. Her brother wanted to be in homicide, like her. Sister Winifred Callaghan had taken to smacking everyone with rulers for all the crude humor that often flew around the bullpen. And her own very nosy, very bossy mother worked downstairs in the café. The precinct was quickly becoming the opposite of a sanctuary. Half the time she just wanted to scream at everyone to leave and get out. She let out a groan putting her head in her hands.

Frankie walked into the bullpen putting a cup of coffee next to his sister. "I heard you went all Hulk Smash on that guy that knocked Maura down."

Jane snapped her head up towards her brother. Frankie could see Frost gesturing to stop talking, but it was too late. "Yeah well, I wouldn't have had to if your perimeter buddies actually did their damn job instead of goofing off."

"Maura's okay though, right?"

"That's not the point!" Jane snapped. She stood from her chair pointing an accusing finger at her brother. He gulped taking a step back. "What if he had a gun or a knife? What if he wasn't mourning the loss of a friend and overcome with emotion? What if he was a psychotic freak who didn't want anyone to touch his work?" _What if Maura got hurt? _She couldn't even voice the real question. Just thinking about it made her chest feel tight. "That's why we secure the scene. That's why we have uniforms at the perimeter to keep the integrity of a crime scene. But you know what your guys were doing?" She didn't bother giving Frankie the time to answer. "Three of them were laughing, probably over some dumb joke or a call from the day before. They were laughing at the scene of a murder and not doing their jobs. It's disrespectful and not okay. Do you understand me? It's not okay that any of this happened." Jane shoved passed her brother to make herself a cup of coffee. She took a deep breath trying to steady her shaky hands. Blood was rushing through her head. She couldn't get the made up image of Maura bleeding in her arms out of her head. It was a quiet unvoiced fear of hers. That someone would break through the tape with a knife or someone would just start shooting through the crime scene for the hell of it. She'd had nightmares before where Maura was stabbed and bleeding and she couldn't protect her. She closed her eyes. _Maura. Is. Fine. _She told herself as she tried to control her breathing. She could hear the sound of clunky heels on tile stop behind her.

"You seem to care a lot about your friend, Jane." Sister Callaghan spoke softly.

Jane grit her teeth before turning. _You're talking to a nun, _she reminded herself before she spoke. She saw Korsak walking out of Cavanaugh's office and towards the interrogation rooms with Frost quickly following him. "You know what sister, I can't do this today. I have a suspect to interrogate." She brushed passed the older woman that haunted her as a child. She followed her partners to the box.

Korsak turned around. "Jane we got this."

She nodded her head. She was adult enough to know what would most likely happen if she walked into the room with that guy, regardless if Frost was there or not. "You tell him, if he doesn't talk, if he doesn't tell us every little thing about his friend's life then charges start getting filed."

Korsak nodded his head solemnly looking straight into Jane's eyes. He knew why this affected Jane so much, even if she would never admit it to herself. Hell, he was pissed off too. The fact that the officers on scene had no respect for the dead was enraging on its own but to have them not doing their job because they were goofing off was another thing entirely. He would never tell the doc but he saw her as his pseudo daughter. He, like Jane, never liked to see anyone hurt much less the people he was closest too. And how many cops had he seen get injured or worse from complacency at a crime scene? The list was too long. Jane was right, if that guy had a gun or a knife, everyone would be suspended or fired. It was unacceptable, plain and simple. Being commanding officer on scene he made damn sure everyone knew it too. Korsak squared his shoulders giving Frost a sharp nod. They weren't playing around today.

Jane walked to the viewing area behind the double sided glass so she could watch. Korsak and Frost sat down. "Mr. Mathews you're aware of your rights?"

"Yes." The man said in a shaky voice. "Who killed Johnny?" He looked each detective in the face.

"We'll get to that in a moment." Frost said.

"Tell us, why was Mr. Douglas in that part of town?"

"He – We own a construction contracting company together. He – He does all the finances and I do the contracting. We were getting into a big project a-and he stayed late last night to fine tune the little details. When he stays late he likes to go to that twenty-four hour dinner right there. There's a waitress there," He smiled as he remembered a fond memory of his friend. "He liked her but he couldn't ever get the nerve to ask her out." He laughed. "Johnny he – he looked like a jock but really he was the total opposite on the inside."

"What was this girl's name?" Korsak asked.

"Sheryl, Sheryl Webb. I think." Jane took out her own notebook writing down the name.

"Did he have any enemies? Any threats to his life or altercations at work that we need to know about?"

He shook his head. "Johnny was a good, standup guy. Everyone loved him." Jane scoffed they were always nice guys that were dead. No one ever wanted to speak bad about a dead friend or colleague.

"What about your business?"

Then Jane noticed the guy stiffened, sitting up straighter than before. "Our business is clean. I'll do whatever I can to cooperate. I'll even let your people go through our stuff without a warrant if that's what you want. Just please find the man that did this to my friend."

Jane's stomach growled. She heard enough either way. She walked out of the room opting for the stairs instead of the elevator. Maura would be proud. The line to the café was long, as usual nowadays, but she took her spot at the end. When she got up to the front her mother had her and Maura's usual lunch order ready. She rang up the price on the register. "You know, Janie there's a cute ma –"

"Nope." Jane said grabbing the food items and quickly leaving the café. She took the stairs again but this time down to the morgue. Jane walked through the morgue until she was in Maura's office. "I know it's early, but people were…" She trailed off as she noticed Maura on the couch with one arm behind her head presumably holding an icepack.

"I did the preliminary autopsy." Maura said slowly sitting up. "He was killed from a thirty-eight caliber bullet puncturing his pulmonary vein. He bled out. And you have food!" She grinned at Jane. "I'm glad you're early."

Jane flopped onto the couch next to Maura. "Everyone is invading my precinct." She whined. "First it was Frankie, then it was my mother and now it's the Sister from hell."

"That was a nice play on words." Maura laughed.

Jane smiled. "Yeah, well, she keeps smacking everyone with a ruler. I feel like I'm in second grade again." She took a bite of her sandwich when her phone rang. She unclipped it from her belt. "Rizzoli." She mumbled through a mouthful of food. She grinned at Maura's reproachful look. "Yeah, I'll be right up." She hung up looking at Maura. "Looks like our lunch is getting cut short once again." Maura smiled at the leaving detective.

Jane hopped off the elevator. She walked to Frost's desk. "You said you had something you wanted to show me?"

He looked up at his partner. "Yeah." He started clicking on his computer pulling up a vehicle accident report from a nearly ten years ago. "Looks like our vic was involved in a DUI accident a while back." He pulled up the pictures of the accident on the scene. Jane grimaced. She was grateful to not be in the traffic unit. Both of the cars were completely smashed to pieces it was a miracle anyone walked away from it.

"He the driver?"

"Nah, the driver was Don Scott. He was twenty-three and died on the scene. The driver for the other car, Samantha Brown, though suffered serious head trauma. She lives with her sister in Dorchester."

"We can check her out tomorrow." She said with a nod. "I'm gonna take Frankie to that Dinner to see if we can speak to that waitress. Going with Korsak's original thought, you should talk to Robbery. Maura said our guy was killed with a thirty-eight. See if they've had similar MO's lately. And if you get done with that, see if we have any video surveillance around the place where it happened. We might get lucky. Korsak," She turned to the older detective. "Look through his business. Make sure Mathews was right when he said they had a clean one." Korsak nodded grabbing his keys. Frost started making phone calls. She turned to her brother. "Ready to follow a real detective around?" She joked. "Follow me."

…

It was dark by the time Jane and Frankie got back to the office. They chased down lead after lead after lead and came up with nothing. All they had was more testimony from various people (the waitress, the bartender of the victim's favorite bar, workers at the construction site, college friends, and family) that John( J-man, Johnny Boy, Boss Man) was a very good, upstanding guy and no one could believe this happened to him. She ran a hand through her hair as she waited for the elevator. This day was too long. She stepped off only barely noticing Maura sitting at her desk. "How long have you been waiting here?"

Maura jumped. "Not long."

"You could've hitched a ride with my mother, you know."

"Really, I don't mind, Jane. I was just finishing up paperwork."

Jane stepped closer to her friend tentatively reaching a hand out to stroke the back of Maura's head. She heard the doctor sigh. "How's the old noggin?"

"My head is fine, much better than it was earlier." Maura leaned into Jane's touch. "But I'm tired." She turned towards Jane. "Are you staying at my place or yours?"

"Mine – no wait, I think they were working on the pipes in the basement today. They said I wouldn't have hot water until tomorrow afternoon. So yours, if that's okay?" She asked.

Maura grinned wider. "It's more than okay." She stood from Jane's chair. Jane gathered her things before following Maura to the elevator. "Sister Callaghan sure is something though."

"Oh my god, what did she say to you?" Jane asked in a horrified voice.

Maura chuckled. "Nothing really, just that I am lucky to have someone like you who cares so much about me in my life." She bumped their shoulders together feeling a slight spark ignite in her bones at the contact. She was definitely going to have to look up what these feelings meant at some point in the very near future. Whatever it was, was not going away like she thought it would. "I have to agree."

Jane couldn't help the smile that graced across her face. Out of all the hard things in her life Maura was always easy, it was a nice balance against the other stuff. "I think it works both ways, doctor."

* * *

**A/N: **I have most of the next chapter written out already it's just a matter of adding detail and putting it all together. So, yay! I'm glad y'all like it so far!

Thanks for reading/reviewing etc.!


	6. Blame it on the Wine

**A/N: **Well, first of all I want to apologize for the later than I said update. I have this summer job now and it's a major time suck and I have not mastered the art of little sleep without coffee and sense I am sans coffee maker at the moment...Anyway. I'm sorry! Second of all: there are spoilers for the movie Just Friends.

**Disclaimer: **Don't own the characters. Not making money. ETC.

* * *

Maura awoke the next day in her own bed, alone. A strange wave of disappointment wove through her as she slowly got out of bed. She was not a natural morning person. Years of forced early mornings either from crime scenes or early college classes or on the rare occasion to appease her own mother had trained her to be awake and mostly alert in the mornings. She rolled over onto her stomach with a very unladylike groan. Her head and neck ached. She walked into the bathroom turning on the shower, the hot water would surely do her body good.

Jane groaned. She was out of toothpaste in Maura's guest bedroom. She twisted the tube in a complete torturous three hundred sixty degree circle over and over and still nothing came out of the end of the tube. If this particular tube of toothpaste were a spy, Jane decided, it would be the best spy ever. She groaned again. It was too early for this, too early for shitty tubes of toothpaste and bad analogies, too early to even be conscious. But she was. She was because she was at Maura's and anytime she was with Maura she tried to make an effort to be awake at a decent time. She threw her head back with a heavy sigh before deciding to go see if Maura had any toothpaste she could borrow.

The door to Maura's bathroom was open so Jane casually assumed in her half asleep state that it was safe and okay to enter. Boy, was she wrong. So very, very wrong. "Hey Maur do you have any –" Her sentence fell to pieces. Her mind left her. She stopped dead in her tracks and she was pretty sure her eyes were as wide as a fly's. "I'm – I'm…" Maura was standing in front of her wearing only a very, very short towel. Her honey blond hair was twisted onto her scalp with a clip. Maura held up a finger at Jane as she moved her own toothbrush around in her mouth. She bent over to spit in her sink. Jane nearly dropped her toothbrush. This, _this _was so not normal. And it was way too damn early. She backed up quickly covering her heated face with her hands.

Maura looked at her extremely flustered friend and couldn't help but laugh a little. Sometime she forgot that seeing other women in towels – or less – was not a common thing for Jane as it was for her. She went to an all-girls boarding school in France. While she was living in the housing facilities on campus she became used to being surrounding by different levels of the dress or undress as it were of women of all shapes and sizes. Jane on the other hand, Maura mused, was probably one of those girls that hid in the bathroom. Jane also had two brothers so it wasn't like she could just walk around in her underwear. A house full of boys was very different than a house full of women. She watched as Jane ran into the door. "Was there something you needed?" She asked politely.

"Toothpaste!" Jane squeaked still embarrassed.

Maura reached over grabbing Jane's toothbrush from her hand. Their fingers slightly touched. She felt that…_feeling _again. The unnameable feeling that she couldn't figure out or shake. She glanced at her friend as she squirted a dollop of blue toothpaste onto the toothbrush. Jane was only half dressed herself. Her slacks were on but no socks or shoes. Maura noticed her toes were painted a dark blue color almost navy. It was a game she liked to play on the off chance she was able to see the detective's bare feet. So far there had been a dark red, an eggshell, and now the blue. Her belt was threaded through the loops but was sticking out from being unbuckled. She wasn't even wearing a work shirt just the tank top that she always wore underneath. She noticed how the fabric hung close to Jane's slight curves and then a feeling she _could _place hit her like a Mack truck. She gulped down the sudden nerves before handing Jane her toothbrush back.

Jane thrust the object into her mouth and started wildly brushing her teeth still mortified that she almost walked in on Maura naked. She was far too comfortable in this house if that happened. She needed to spend more time at her own place to bring some boundaries back into their friendship. She turned around nearly hitting the door again on her way out. "Thanks." The word was muffled through the spit and toothpaste excess but Maura could clearly hear it. Maura nodded her head at Jane's back.

After Jane left Maura placed her hands on the sink counter. "Oh my god." She let out a shaky breath. "Oh my god." She repeated. That feeling when she stared at Jane in that tank top the feeling that flooded her core was attraction. Solid attraction. She was attracted to her best friend. How had this even happened? _When_ had this happened? She found herself guessing, grasping at straws because she just couldn't be attracted to Jane Rizzoli. Jane Rizzoli was her best friend and so, so not her type. But then the conversation from days earlier came flooding back to her. Jane _was _actually her type. She was tall and gorgeous and Italian and an ass at times and wild. Her heart was beating faster in her chest. This could not be happening. It was like someone cracked an egg over her head and as the yolk ran down her face she became a totally different person. She hoped she wasn't too far gone. That she could just stick that particular nugget of information in a nice neat box somewhere in the recesses of her mind. After all, she was attracted to a lot of people. She found Frost attractive but that didn't mean she wanted to sleep with him. Attraction didn't mean anything. It was just the body's reaction to something that the person thought was pleasant. So her being attracted to Jane the one time when they were both slightly undressed shouldn't have been a big deal. So why did it feel so monumental?

The awkwardness during the ride to work was only slightly alleviated by the soft classic rock music coming from the speakers of Maura's Prius. Maura parked in the parking garage, having learned her lesson the last time she parked in the front of the building and had her car towed. Jane hopped out of the car giving her long legs a stretch. She waited for Maura to get out before they both took the stairs to the front of the building. "You hungry?" Jane asked being the first to break the silence.

Maura let out a breath feeling the tension leave her shoulders. "Yes. The café?" Jane nodded grabbing the door for Maura. "Thank you, Jane." Jane grinned slightly following Maura into the café. Since the online ordering system sans the over informed eavesdropping blogging of Angela Rizzoli The place was significantly less crowded. The two sat across from each other while Angela brought them their usual order: pancakes for Jane and an egg white omelet for Maura.

Angela stood behind her counter watching the two. She knew Jane spent the night at Maura's now two days in a row. Grown women, grown people, don't just do that. The more she watched the duo the more she was convinced that something more than friendly was going on between them. She watched as Jane passed Maura the salt and Maura passed Jane the butter. No words were spoken as they took turns with the sugar. They each took a napkin from the dispenser giving it to the other. It was almost as if they had done this very act a thousand times. It was like a dance between them without the fumble of forks or plates or drinks. Angela couldn't remember a time when Jane was that comfortable eating with anyone. It was always awkward with Jane being left handed. Others would place a drink right in the way and she'd nearly knock it over with her elbow as she reached for something or they would try to sit on her left and their arms would continuously knock together. But with Maura none of that was there. It was smooth and perfectly seamless. When the pair got up Angela half expected her daughter to lean over and lightly kiss Maura on the lips before telling her to have a good day.

Of course, that didn't happen. Instead Jane rose to her feet followed in seconds by the ME. Angela kept her eye on them as Jane handed Maura a handful of bills which Maura shoved back into Jane's hand. This one was another type of game Angela knew from watching. Jane narrowed her eyes. Angela couldn't help but give a slight chuckle as she rang up another customer. When she went back to watching Jane was nowhere to be found but Maura was walking towards her extracting her wallet from her purse. Maura was the one of the few that could win an argument with Jane without a major blowup. As she slid Maura's card a plan began to form in her head. Those two needed to get their act together and maybe she could give them the push in the right direction.

Jane sat at her desk. She had a mountain of paperwork to do already and the case just started. She spent the first couple of hours at work organizing her highly disorganized desk. She could feel the eyes of Sister Callaghan watching her. Jane had reached the page of high annoyance with this woman. Her eyes caught the yellow post-it note sticking to her computer screen. She put it there the day before as a reminder to call Samantha Brown from the car accident their victim and she were in nearly a decade ago. She picked up her desk phone dialing the number. The phone rang a couple times before going to voicemail. "Hello, my name is Detective Jane Rizzoli, that's R-I-Z-Z-O-L-I. I work for the Boston Police Department in the Homicide Unit. We're currently in the middle of an investigation and I'd appreciate it if you could give me a call back at this number. Thank you for your cooperation." Then she hung up the phone. She always liked to end voice mails like that. It tricked people into wanting to call or come down to the station for an interview. If she already thanked them then they usually felt obligated to come and earn that thanks.

Jane leaned back in her chair. The woman she just called was all they had left. She turned to Frost. "Did Robbery ever get back to you?"

He shook his head. "My old partner is going through some of the files trying to find a connection, but he doesn't think there have been any recent robberies using a thirty-eight. He'll tell me if he finds something though."

Jane nodded. "What about the security cameras in the area?"

Frost gestured towards his computer. "Looking through them now. Thought I'd be safe and take the footage from the whole block. You wanna help?" At his partner's nod he scooted the stack of DVD's across his desk onto hers.

She grabbed the first DVD and stuck it in the computer. Her thoughts of a long day seemed to double the longer she sat at her desk staring at her computer. She watched video after video, hours and hours of dark screens and cars gently driving by. The biggest thing she saw that even came close to being illegal was a maybe prostitute who didn't even get any business. Who knows maybe she was a cop. She gave a drive laugh at the thought. She would tell Vice about it later. She took a glance at her watch before leaning back with a groan. Her chair creaked dangerously at the move but thankfully she did not topple over. She gave a yawn throwing her pen down. "I'm going to lunch." She stood. "Call me if you find anything." Of course 'going to lunch' wasn't just 'going to lunch.' It more specifically meant she just needed a break from her computer, to stretch her legs and grab a bag of cheese-its from the vending machine then maybe sneak down to the morgue to visit her best friend.

Maura was having a similar day. She ran the few medical tests she had to run when she came into her office that morning. For the rest of the day she spent attempting to do her paperwork and look at the records of the new interns that were coming for their rounds in a few weeks. It was one of the added jobs she had to do as Chief. She knew everyone secretly hated the morgue rotation and learning on cadavers. Cadavers – dead bodies – didn't spit out blood or clutch at hands that were needed to stop the bleeding or look at you with big terrified eyes begging you not to let their brother die. She blinked. She hated working on live people. Live people were dangerous, they changed, they weren't constant. They got sick or got shot or were hit with cars or were volatile and angry when hurt. Like Jane. Jane was volatile at times. Out of the short list of live people she had worked on Frankie Rizzoli was the worst because Jane was there. There was a reason at hospitals that family members weren't in the operating room with the doctors. There was too much pressure to do right. But that was ages ago, and so much had happened since then. Jane had done an emergency operation on _her_. That was a new one for both of them. And then there was Dennis and Casey. There was that thought again, that unnameable feeling at the mere thought of Casey's name. Was it jealousy? Was that even possible? What did jealousy feel like? Again she was thrown back into the realm of a much smaller Maura Isles who was terrified of people, a younger version of herself that was very much an adult even before hitting the double digits in age.

She remembered as a child her mother taking her to see a child psychologist. They did tests to see if she was autistic because of her social awkwardness. They found that she was not, she was just socially awkward which they insisted was okay but it wasn't it. They gave her an IQ test too which was how she found out she was a genius as they put it. Saying it out loud like that as if it were some big accomplishment always made her feel foolish though. For the longest time in her youth she couldn't even comprehend the concept that she was a genius. Because if she was a genius she should've been able to start a conversation or hold one or not weird people out with her random facts. Geniuses were adaptable, she convinced herself so she must have been born with some piece of her brain not wired correctly. But when she voiced this to her father he sat her down with a biography about Albert Einstein. She devoured books biographies after that. She loved learning about people and the struggles, the battles, that everyone seemed to face behind closed doors fascinated her as a child. In France she found a small niche of girls that liked to study making friends had been difficult but not overly impossible. The same happened in college. But it wasn't until Jane that she actually had a true best friend.

Emotion was still a concept that eluded her though. It was like a half completed math problem to her. She could understand it at its most basic form but she never knew what to do with that information. When a person was angry was she supposed to agree with what they were saying? When a person was sad how was she to console them? So how the hell was she supposed to know if she was jealous of Casey because he stole most of Jane's free time? There was a soft knock on her office door. Maura sat up straighter in her desk. "May I help you?" She asked not even bothering to look up at her intruder. She quickly clicked out of the shoe page she found herself on.

"Just brought you some lunch. You okay, Maur?" Jane asked stepping into the room holding two white to-go containers and a couple bottles of water.

"Oh." Maura said standing to move to the couch. "Thank you for lunch again, Jane."

Jane nodded her head as she sat down. "I hate this couch." She commented jumping on her butt slightly.

"Don't talk to me about couches, Detective." She took a swallow of the water Jane gave her. "You have no room to talk until you get rid of that abomination of yours in your apartment."

Jane laughed. "For your information, I ordered a couch online a few days ago. It'll be at my place tomorrow."

"Oh." Maura sounded surprised. She took the container and fork Jane offered her. "What does it look like?"

Jane wiggled a finger in her direction. "You're just going to have to wait and see." Silence fell over the two of them as they each ate or pretended to eat in Maura's case their lunch. After a moment Jane had enough. She placed her box onto the table in front of her and turned to Maura. "C'mon talk to me. What's going on in that brain of yours?"

Maura sighed placing her own barely touched food to the side. It was a heavy sigh, Jane noted. The type that had a thousand words behind it. Jane sat up a little straighter trying to focus all of her attention on Maura. Most of the time in these situations Maura would go in a roundabout way of telling her what was bothering her. There was a lot of big words and talk about different studies from colleges she didn't even knew existed. "If I ask you to tell me something, will you tell me the honest truth?"

"Of course, always. I don't lie to you Maura, ever."

"What's wrong with me?" Well, that definitely threw Jane for a loop. Maura gave another heavy sigh. Jane reached across the small space between them to gently rub Maura's thigh. Maura felt that spark again knowing this time full well what it was. Before Jane could speak Maura continued talking. "Every time I speak it's like the words that leave my mouth mean nothing. I've even tried to talk about baseball once and I somehow ended up talking about trigonometry."

"Maura nothing is wrong with you, it's just the way you are." Jane said tenderly.

"Well, I wish it wasn't." Maura crossed her arms over her chest with a _hmph _reminding Jane of a petulant child.

"It's not – now don't take this the wrong way, but it's not as bad as you think it is. The social awkwardness I mean. In the early days of our friendship, you were colder, more sealed off. But I think as we grew and our friendship grew the more human side of you has come out. We've helped each other be better people over the years. Very few people call you names anymore. I think Velma Dinkley is better than the Queen of The Dead." Maura gave a small laugh. Jane smiled at the sound. "I mean Velma was part of the best and coolest mystery solving crew and Queen of the Dead sounds like some zombie overlord queen or something." She reached a hand over again to grab Maura's hand. "You have friends Maura. Good friends. You shouldn't pay attention to what the people here tell you. I mean," Jane shrugged. "If you really think about it, you're like the smartest one in this building most of the time. Most of the people here don't even have degrees. We're all just boots in suits. We do the grunt work."

"That's not true."

Jane shrugged again. "All I'm saying is that we get paid to do the dirty work, to run towards danger and to be asked to risk it all for a decision that may or may not happen in court. If you ask me, everyone in this building is a little crazy. In fact I'd challenge you to find me someone who isn't."

"You." Maura said quietly unable to look into Jane's eyes. Instead she looked at their hands intertwined. It felt nice, normal, and completely natural. Maybe there was something deeper than attraction?

Jane laughed. "Oh, I'm real crazy, Maur. Probably one of the craziest ones here." Only then did Maura meet Jane's dark eyes. "For one my heart rules my head which makes me gullible. How many times have I been kidnapped? Too many times, you think I would learn by now. And then there's the little fact that I shot myself to kill the bad guy holding me hostage." She nodded her head. "If that's not a little bit crazy, I don't know what is." She gave Maura's hand a squeeze. "Everyone's a little bit different Maura. Besides, I like it when you talk about math while watching or playing baseball. You make it sound…" She struggled to find the right words to say. "Not…math-y." They both laughed. "My point is everyone's a little crazy, a little weird, but we all make it work. We can be crazy and weird together, okay?"

"Okay." Maura said with a smile and a nod of her head.

…

Angela took her lunch break to go up to the homicide unit. She wanted to talk to Sergeant Korsak about Jane and Maura. She had just given Jane her and Maura's lunch so it was a perfect time seeing as how Jane wouldn't be there. She walked into the bullpen right up to Sergeant Korsak's desk. "Hey, Mrs. Rizzoli Jane's not here right now is there anything I can do for you?" The older man chortled.

"Oh I'm not looking for Jane." Angela said with a wave. "And call me Angela, Mrs. Rizzoli is much too formal."

He nodded his head with a grin. "Vince then, please." He gestured to the empty seat next to his desk. "Would you like to sit?"

"Yes, I would." The second she sat down she turned to Vince. "I'm just curious what do you think about the relationship between Maura and Jane?"

Vince furrowed his brow. "They're not dating, if that's what you're asking."

"Oh, I know that." Angela waved her arm in dismissal. "But they should, don't you think?"

The sergeant was quiet for a moment giving the question some thought. "They would make a good couple, and honestly," He admitted to her. "It's like they're dating already without actually dating."

"Oh, I know, with the amount of time they spend together."

"They're both stubborn though."

"Too stubborn for their own good sometimes."

Vince laughed. "Yes."

Angela inched closer to his desk leaning towards him conspiratorially. "So I was wondering if you would, maybe talk to Janie for me. Don't make it real obvious you know, but she won't listen to me. I know she respects you, so if you could just nudge her slightly in the right direction?"

Vince was grinning now. Angela played dirty, he kind of liked it. "Yeah, I can do that."

"Thank you, Vince." She patted his arm as she stood.

…

It was six PM and Jane was bored. Hours of surveillance tape had yielded no results. She finished all her paperwork. The only thing that was left was waiting. She had to wait on that phone call, on Frost's old partner from Robbery to get back to them, and on the test results from the DNA and hair sample the she found on the victim. There was absolutely no use for her to even be at the precinct anymore. She fired Maura a text message asking is she wanted to come over to her house for pizza and TV. When she got a yes in reply she told her to come over at any time and that she was heading out.

Half an hour later Jane was showered and in pajamas with the hot pizza sitting on her coffee table. The second time there was a knock on her door she knew it was Maura. Quickly she went to open the door a smile on her face. The ME was in "comfortable" clothes which still resembled something mildly uncomfortable to Jane's eyes. The ensemble consisted of form fitting yoga pants that looked entirely too tight to be even remotely comforting and a loose off the shoulder sweater that brought out the green in Maura's eyes. She eyed the garment bag in Maura's hand. "I thought I might be prepared in case I ended up staying the night."

Jane nodded her head stepping to the side of the door to let the doctor in. "Good thinking." After putting away her things she sat down inches from Jane on the couch. She took a sip of the wine Jane had set out for her. Jane clicked the TV on going to her DVR. They debated for a few seconds on what to watch but finally decided on Just Friends. Maura had never seen it and the synopsis sounded somewhat vaguely familiar. She wanted to know how the situation would work out on the big screen. Jane only agreed because she had DVR'd it which meant she was going to watch it at some point in the near future regardless. As the movie played on she was not expecting the multiple plot twists or the character dynamics at all. She found herself silently rooting for Jamie and Chris to get together. At the end of the movie when it finally happened she couldn't keep the grin on her face. She turned to Jane.

"It would be easy, between us." Maura said lightly running her hand over Jane's which resting on her shoulder as her arm was thrown over the back of the couch. Maura had no idea what possessed her to say it, to voice the thought that was still so very new to her and didn't make much sense at the moment. Maybe it was the two glasses of wine or the full stomach or even the company. Later if Jane ever asked her she would blame her lose tongue on the wine. She kept talking though, digging herself a deeper and deeper hole. "We would kiss and have a long beautiful relationship. Everyone thinks we're together already." Jane hummed in agreement. "It would be easy, not like it was for them in the movie."

"But it's not." Jane said finally cutting through.

Maura looked at her friend with a bittersweet smile as she felt her heart drop a little in her chest. "It's not." She agreed.

"If we were in a movie I'd come rescue you from a bad date. And then stare at you with longing as you talked about all your failed relationships. Then I'd get angry and unexpectedly kiss you and storm off into a random direction." Jane said recounting every love story she'd ever seen played out on the big screen.

"Then I'd find you." Maura continued. "And tell you how stupid you are for storming off without letting me explain or react. Finally, I'd kiss you." And Maura for the first time in their friendship actually wanted to plant one of the detective's lips, just to see how easy or not easy it would actually be.

"Fade to black." Jane whispered. She too overcome with a strange emotion she couldn't quite place, one she wasn't entirely sure she wanted to place. She retracted her arm from around Maura's shoulders and got up from the couch nearly making Maura fall sideways. "Man, I need another beer."

* * *

**A/N:** Things are starting to move forward! Yay! Again sorry for the slight delay!

Thanks for reading/reviewing!


	7. Why Aren't We Dating?

**A/N: **Someone said in a review that 'anyways' wasn't a word, so I went back and changed it in the previous chapters and I'll try my best not to use it again.

**Disclaimer: **Don't own the characters. Not making money. ETC.

* * *

Jane rubbed her tired eyes with her palms. It was midday and she was sitting at her desk after another night with Maura. She found herself getting used to waking up next to the honey blond doctor. There was a small comfort that came with waking up next to a living breathing person. She always slept better with the doctor at her side too. It was like Maura had some mystical power that shrouded the bedroom in a protective bubble where all the bad things couldn't even attempt to reach her.

She was alone in the bullpen on her third cup of coffee. Frost was in the Robbery Unit looking up a possible lead. There was a guy in a dark hooded sweatshirt that robbed a couple coming out of a restaurant with a thirty-eight caliber revolver almost a week ago. Korsak was out digging and talking to CI's. In their absence she had talked with the Traffic Unit to find more about the car accident from nearly ten years ago. They told her that threats and charges had been thrown around shortly after the incident. Jane knew enough about people to know that nearly a decade of pent up rage could lead to murder. Some people just didn't deal with their emotions well.

Jane sighed putting her head in her hands. She hated cases like this one. They were the kind of run of the mill murder investigations that could easily get shoved under the rug or pushed onto the backburner for more important cases. She groaned into her palms. She _hated _leaving cases unsolved. It made her feel like she wasn't doing her job right, like she wasn't serving her city or earning her paycheck. She rolled her jaw to the side deciding to get up and stretch her legs. The second she pushed away from her desk her phone rang. "Detective Jane Rizzoli speaking." She said into the receiver.

"Hi, my name is Samantha Brown-Sherman. I missed your call yesterday." The woman Jane noticed sounded just as tired as she felt.

"Yes, thank you for getting back to me." Jane sat up straighter. "Are you in Boston?"

"No, I'm on vacation in California. You said in the voicemail you were a homicide detective?"

"Yes, that's right. I was calling because, I'm not sure you remember him, but a man by the name of John Douglas was killed two days ago."

"I remember him." Even over the phone Jane could hear the change in the woman's voice. "That's terrible, but why does that have anything to do with me?"

Jane licked her lips. "I understand after the car accident there were threats made."

"The accident was years ago!"

"I know, but we have to cover all of our bases. It's procedure." Jane replied calmly.

A brief moment of silence passed over the phone before the other woman spoke again. "Have you ever wondered what it would be like to wake up one day and not remember? Your sister – or whoever – is sitting right next to you but she's a stranger. And you have to watch that realization fall onto her face. You have to watch as she pretends that it doesn't bother her that her only family doesn't know who she is. You don't know what your scars mean, how you got them or the stories. You don't remember your own name or your favorite color or that you're allergic to dandelions. Everything is just blank. You have this clean slate that you never asked for. After the accident, my sister was angry. You'd be angry too. Things were said. It was a hard time on everyone. But we all made it through. My memory eventually came back and I recovered from the other injuries. That accident was _years _ago, and we've all but forgot about it. We – my sister, our husbands and the kids – are on a family vacation. Two days ago we were all in a hotel in Chicago. I'm sure they have some sort of surveillance or something. I have receipts and family photos too."

Jane nodded her head even though the other woman couldn't see her. This had been a long shot from the start. Her gut had screamed 'robbery' at the scene of the crime. She should've just listened to it, but she had to make sure. With a heavy sigh she finished the conversation and took the woman's information.

Korsak came back a few hours later to find Jane idly sitting at her desk. He threw a file on her desk making her jump slightly at the intrusion. "Hey, found out that a guy pawned off a silver Rolex matching the victim's watch."

Jane perked up slightly. "You get a photo of the guy?"

The older detective shook his head. "Kept his face away from the camera but we got the owner of the pawn shop meeting with a sketch artist to hopefully draw up a picture."

Jane nodded her head. "Good."

…

"Frankie move the couch." Jane nearly forgot about the couch situation until Maura brought it up over a late lunch. Maura knew a charity that would gladly take the old couch so Jane had given her a key to her apartment to let them take it away. Now it was just a matter of moving the new couch into her second floor apartment.

He looked at his sister tentatively. He was going to help her anyway because he was the good brother. If Jane said she needed a left handed spiral he would go out and find one and bring it to her even though he knew it was just to get him out of the way. But he was also a cop and cunning and wanted to know just what he could get out of her if he did this. "What do I get if I help?"

Jane gave him one of her nearly patented 'Really?' looks before rolling her eyes. "I'll let you in on my next case." She looked at the couch the delivery people had pretty much dropped on her stoop, not really wanting to move it herself. "And I'll let you sit in on my next interrogation."

Frankie grinned. "Really?" Jane nodded. "Deal." He bent over the couch about to lift. "Tommy get the other end will ya'?"

Tommy took a step back. "No way." He turned to Jane. "What do I get if I help you?" Tommy wasn't the smartest or the one to follow his siblings lead, but he knew when an opportunity struck he might as well try to cash in on it.

Jane looked at him already over the new couch. "What do you want?" Tommy smirked flashing his eyes to Maura, who was standing near her unmarked talking to her mother, then back to Jane with one eyebrow raised. Jane had been a detective long enough to know the nonverbal cue her brother was getting at. "No." Jane said shaking her head. "Absolutely not." Then she walked to the other side of the couch. Maura was worth more than a damn couch and a sore back. Her brother was an idiot if he thought she would cave that easily. "Ready, Frankie?" Together they heaved the couch up into the air.

It took nearly an hour to get everyone but Maura to leave her apartment once the couch was settled. The two sat on the couch, Jane had her feet propped in Maura's lap. It was an intimate gesture. Maybe, Maura thought, this underlying current of something more had always been there. Their friendship always blurred the lines a little between platonic friendship and romantic relationship. She'd always chalked it up to Jane being a tactile person, but now it seemed like something more. She had her hands on Jane's ankles occasionally stroking the sock covered feet. Jane was slowly flipping through the channels of her TV her mind clearly elsewhere. "This couch is far more comfortable than your older one." Maura ventured breaking the silence. "It looks nicer too."

Jane snorted. "Thanks." Honestly, she couldn't stop thinking about the phone call from that morning. It came in waves. She would be sitting in front of her computer looking at security tapes again and it would hit her. Or as it had at lunch when she was sitting next to Maura the thought of not knowing how important she was sent her rapidly blinking. _A clean slate that you never asked for. _People said that all the time, that they wanted a clean slate, or that they wanted to just forget. She had said those things, but if that clean slate had meant not knowing her mother, her brothers, Frost, Korsak…Maura. She didn't want it.

Maura bit her lip. Jane would talk if she wanted to talk. Being Jane's best friend came with certain knowledge that patience would be needed if you wanted to stick with her through it all. It was a good thing patience was one quality Maura had an abundance of. She shifted Jane's feet so she could stand. "I have to use the bathroom." She said quietly at Jane's questioning stare. The other woman merely nodded her head.

Jane looked at her hands, her thoughts continuing down the path she was headed before Maura interrupted her. She couldn't imagine waking up and suddenly not knowing how she got the scars or looking at her hands not knowing that there was blood on them. She couldn't imagine the look on her mother's face as she asked how she got them or what they meant. Her mother didn't even know the whole story. She looked down at herself sprawled out on the couch trying to see from an outsider's perspective what she could see in herself. She stood and walked in front of the door.

Her grandmother once told her the hardest part about leaving a home you shared with someone you loved who was no longer there wasn't the big stuff. Jane remembered the look on her grandmother's face as she said in her slightly Italian accented voice that it wasn't selling the house it was finding the dusty boots of her late grandfather's by the back door. It was the small things like that that would catch her off guard and out of place. Little reminders like that were all over the house. It was why she had called Jane's father, her middle son, to help with the moving.

Jane noticed there were little touches of Maura all over her apartment. They were remnants of another person, a person she cared for, living in her house. Small tokens like the hair clip sitting on her coffee table littered her home reminding her of that conversation with her grandmother. She saw Maura's running shoes by the door with one shoelace slightly untied. She gave a small smile. That shoelace was always slightly untied. She could remember stopping midway into a run completely out of breath so Maura could tie that shoelace. Part of her thought Maura did it on purpose to give her a slight break in an otherwise unforgiving run because Maura knew she would never ask to stop for a break. There was a box of Raisin Bran in her kitchen cabinets and two percent milk in her fridge. There were high heels that clearly weren't hers neatly by the coat rack where a blazer in a fashionable cut that fit Maura perfectly hung. A bottle of wine sat on her kitchen counter even though she didn't drink wine and even if she couldn't see it from her vantage point she knew there was a toothbrush in her bathroom that sat next to hers in the cup.

This was home, all of these things had somehow become home. The word always held so much meaning and peace and comfort with the promise of security – all of this had become that. Somehow, someway Maura Isles had walked into her life and set up camp without her ever noticing. No one had ever seamlessly stepped into her life and accepted her the way Maura had.

Maura walked out of the bathroom to notice her friend standing in the doorway scrutinizing her apartment. "Thinking of redecorating?" She went to stand by Jane.

Jane jumped clutching the front of her chest. "No I was…" She trailed off looking at Maura with that same objective eye. Maybe there was something to what her mother said. If she was being objective about it they did look and act like a couple without the physical side. They joked and there had always been a lot of touching. They spent most of their free time together. Her own family practically lived with Maura. Many of the points in their friendship went way beyond the normal level of best friend camaraderie. She coughed. "You're good at all that psychoanalysis junk. Tell me from a clean, unbiased perspective, like if you didn't know me at all and this," She waved her hand around in a circular motion. "Was some sort of crime scene, what would you infer about me."

Maura looked at Jane with a questioning stare, then turned her attention to the living room. "I don't like to guess, that's the trouble with psychology, if you don't actually know what –"

"Just humor me, Maura."

"Okay." Maura took a step forward into the room. "I'd say the person that lives here is a woman and a Boston native. Woman, because the shoes by the door are women's and the décor has a subtle feminine vibe, like the curtains." She ghosted her fingertips over the object. She remembered the first time Jane's apartment had actually been a crime scene when Hoyt escaped from prison and trashed the place. A person's home said so much about them and to have the whole place trashed like it was she knew from experience left the person feeling violated. She hadn't known Jane very well at that point, so she played this game to keep her worried mind occupied while the other officers tried to find her friend. With every turn she made she remembered something new that was in the place of something old that had been trashed or shredded or aggressively stabbed. "The Boston picture and the Boston sports team memorabilia help bring me to the Boston conclusion. I'd also venture to say based on the amount of baseballs on the desk that it is in fact your preferred sport." She walked around the room getting lost in the game. "You have a dog as evidenced by the dog bed and toys. You're a police officer." She mumbled quietly as her eyes grazed over the marksmanship trophies on the desk.

"How do you know?" Jane asked her own voice slightly rougher than usual.

Maura pointed to the small trophies sitting by her desk. "If I was being completely objective about the situation not knowing anything about you and if this _were_ a crime scene as you said, I wouldn't be surprised if the detectives investigating were open to the possibility that you may have a girlfriend."

"On what grounds?"

Maura turned sharply at Jane. She had her thumb in her mouth the way she always did while in deep thought. She raised her eyebrow but continued on. "There are two wine glasses set on the kitchen table, two dishes in the sink. My – There are heels by the door and a coat on the rack that wouldn't fit you because it's too small. There's also a second toothbrush in the bathroom and extra clothes in the nightstand drawer on the side of the bed you don't sleep on. Based on the social constructs of society those items generally mean that two people are dating, it's a way of marking territory for other potential suitors to see." She swallowed hard at the conclusion of her sentence. The realization that she would be that girlfriend, she would be Jane's girlfriend, that these things, these reasons were because of her, sent a heated blush rapidly to her cheeks.

"Is that why I have an extra toothbrush in my bathroom, so you can mark your territory?" Jane cracked a slight grin. She couldn't help but to bring sarcasm and humor into the conversation.

"No." Maura said with a smile. "It was a logical step in our friendship considering that we spend so much time together and frequently spend the night at each other's homes. Just like your things are in my guest bedroom at my home. It makes things easier and more efficient." She paused looking at Jane once more who still looked deep in thought. It wasn't a lie but a part of her did like the idea of a male visitor of Jane's seeing her toothbrush or her things in Jane's bedroom. "What brought this on? Is something bothering you?"

"Why aren't we dating?" The question just floated out of Jane's mouth, as if she was thinking out loud. She didn't attempt to retract it either but continued talking instead. "It looks like I'm dating you, I act like I'm dating you, it feels like I'm dating you, but I'm not. We're not. You said it so yourself it would be easy. We understand each other's jobs. We're already friends." She stopped talking and shook her head as if coming out of a trance. "I don't know. In the phone call with Samantha Brown earlier she asked me how it would feel to wake up one day not knowing who you are, not knowing how you got your scars, or who your friends are. So I started thinking what I would see if I walked into this apartment this very moment and had no recollection of anything." She paused before turning to Maura. "You and I came to the same conclusion." She turned away again. "The detectives working the case would never believe you were just a friend."

Maura's heart hammered in her chest. What did this mean? Did Jane possibly feel the same as she did? _Why aren't we dating? _Why _weren't _they dating? "Well, you're a homicide detective and I work in the morgue in the basement of Boston Police Headquarters. Most of the detectives know how close we are. But let's try to not make your apartment a crime scene again." That got Jane to laugh.

"Good point. It was hard cleaning up after that. Both times." She added quickly. She gave Maura a smile.

Maura smiled back her eyes ghosting over Jane's face. She had a remarkable face and the height to be a model. And yet she was a police officer, she hid her beauty in baggy t-shirts and jeans and ill-fitting suits. "Why'd you become a cop?" Her eyes fell back to Jane's deep ones.

Jane laughed making her way back to her new couch. Maura followed. "We had career day in elementary school. They had a lot of people there representing a lot of different careers. There was a firefighter, a lawyer, teachers obviously, a nurse, a doctor and a cop." Jane shrugged. "When I saw the police officer for the first time something just clicked, even at nine, it was like a light got switched on or something." There was a pause. "Why'd you want to be a medical examiner?" She asked nudging Maura with her elbow.

Maura laughed. "I thought you didn't want me to tell you I wanted to dissect dead people my whole life." Jane laughed. "In my life growing up saying I wanted to be a medical examiner was somewhat frowned upon. For the longest time my parents and their friends knew I wanted to be a doctor."

"Thought you couldn't lie?"

Maura shrugged. "It wasn't a lie, I am a doctor and I do have live patients." She pointed to Jane. "You are my most frequent live patient."

Jane smiled. "Guess it's a good thing we're friends then, saves me money on medical bills." She swallowed down a yawn. "I'm glad you're a medical examiner though. If not, we'd be stuck with Pike." She waited half a second for Maura to defend the other ME she nearly burst into laughter when she didn't.

"What?" Maura asked innocently.

"You're not going to tell me how Pike isn't that bad?" Jane asked through a slight chuckle.

"He can't tell the difference between a thirty-eight caliber bullet and a forty-five. Even _you _can tell the difference." Her smile dropped when she noticed Jane's raised eyebrows. "You know I just heard what that sounded like and what I meant –"

Jane couldn't help herself but laugh. With Maura the laughter always came so easily it was nice to just relax with her friend. "You really haven't changed at all." Her eyes drifted back towards Maura who now looked a tad uncertain. "It's a good thing." She said reassuringly.

"As long as it's a good thing." Maura said quietly. Jane nodded moving her body so she was facing Maura, their knees almost touching. She closed her eyes resting her cheek against the couch. Maura took the moment to look freely at her friend.

Jane's high cheekbones and tan skin were the first things she noticed when saw the detective for the first time. But here in Jane's living room with Jane lying almost sideways on the couch in a tank top and plaid pants her eyes traveled elsewhere. They went first towards Jane's prominent clavicle, the sleek muscle of Jane's arms down to the slight curve of her thin waist to the wonderful curve where hip connected to side.

She licked her lips. She wasn't entirely sure this feeling, the warmth she felt inside her body, was entirely new. It felt too natural, too normal to have been fresh. She had just ignored it for so long that now that she acknowledged it she couldn't go back to her mindset as it was before. Once she saw it, once she put words to it, she couldn't unsee it. And in a few short days after her realization all she wanted was Jane. She never felt this strongly of a visceral pull towards someone before. It was a dangerous craving, one that could have great consequences both good and bad. But sitting on Jane's couch as Jane sighed heavenly burrowing herself deeper into the cushion she could only think of the good. She could only think of the way Jane's hands would feel sliding over her body or the way Jane's lips would taste like coffee and the chapstick she wore because she didn't drink enough water. She wanted to reach out and brush the stray dark curl away from Jane's face. She swallowed hard moving so she was literally sitting on her hand. "I should go." Her voice was barely a whisper.

Jane cracked one eye open. "You could stay." She mumbled into the couch.

Maura bit her lip, she really couldn't. She needed space to breathe, to collect herself. "I have to feed Bass."

Jane nodded. "Tell him I said hi." She yawned. "Text me when you get home so I know you made it?"

"I will." She stood walking towards the door. She pulled her heels and blazer and grabbed her purse. "Goodnight, Jane." She took her car keys from her bag noticing Jane's apartment key still attached to it. "Oh, I still have your key." She took a step forward.

"Keep it." Jane said sleepily. She stayed on the couch and didn't notice Maura pull the key close to her heart or the suspiciously watery hazel eyes. It was the little things like that that made Maura's world go off kilter. "Goodnight, Maur."

Maura sent Jane a text message as promised when she got to her house. She walked inside locking her door and placing her purse on the bar in her kitchen. Now that there was more distance between her and her current crush and best friend she began thinking more deeply about entering into a deeper romantic relationship with Jane.

If it had been anyone else she wouldn't have any qualms about acting on her feelings but this was different. This wasn't about the perchance of an unpleasant first date and making the choice of not going on a second one or just not calling. This was about if that first date was unpleasant and she said so she could hurt her best friend's feelings. Her best friend could feel like she wasn't good enough for her. Or maybe _she_ wasn't good enough for Jane. Not calling wasn't even an option because her date was her best friend. They were not only best friends but colleagues as well. There was also the small fact that Jane's mother lived in her guest house. The potential for awkwardness was too great. They had a great friendship, a fantastic friendship, so why ruin it?

But then her mind drifted to a brief image of waking up with Jane every day, an image where her home was Jane's home, where they walked the dog together or read the Sunday paper while they ate breakfast. A soft kiss here, a lingering touch there. It was an image that only just popped into her head and it made that warm feeling she felt all night explode into something deeper. (And the fact that she used the word "warm" to describe a hormonal balance shift was a testament to how much Jane had changed her world.)

This situation with Jane could either be the biggest mistake of her life and could then change the delicate balance of their friendship forever. _Or_ it could be the best decision she ever made and still change the delicate balance of their friendship forever. But, Maura thought, their friendship had already changed whether she wanted to admit it or not. How long could she keep pretending her heart hadn't switched up on her? Maura let out a big sigh as she placed Bass' food on his placemat. She suddenly found new meaning to the phrase "it's complicated."

* * *

**A/N: **Little secret/behind the scenes: this chapter gave me lots of problems but it was the sole reason I started writing this story to begin with.

Thanks for reading!


	8. A Shooting and Cupcakes

**A/N: **The amount of time I spent writing this was just ridiculous.

**Disclaimer: **Don't own the characters. Not making money. ETC.

* * *

All night the only thing Maura could think about were Jane's words and the semi-rhetorical question that was randomly blurted out. Why weren't they dating? It was a completely inappropriate question that led to completely inappropriate thoughts. No matter how many times she told herself that Jane was off limits or that she was just sexually frustrated because her dating life had ended with a screeching halt, Jane's words spurred her on the path she'd been going down the past few days. When she got home she spent hours talking it through with Bass. The only answer she was able to come up with was that they never thought about it before, which was mostly true. It may have been some form or other of a fleeting thought, a passing moment after a few too many glasses of wine but Jane as a serious contender for her heart was never a real option. But now that she had thought about it, a lot, she couldn't put that thought into a small box in the corner of her brain as she hoped. Instead every time she saw the detective she kept noticing small things that she'd never noticed before. Like how when Jane smiled her entire face lit up and her dimples were on full display. It made Maura want to make Jane smile like that all the time. Or she'd notice the subtle femininity of Jane's otherwise boyish figure and the way her hips swayed ever so slightly when she walked.

She and Jane were truly opposites yet somehow they were best friends. They knew when to push each other and when to stop. They protected one another. Most importantly, at least in Maura's eyes, they were two independent naturally unbending people that bent and leaned on each other. They were the one and only exception to each other's own rules. No one had been that for Maura, and she was fairly certain she was never that for anyone else. Somehow, Maura knew that if they were to enter into a deeper relationship they would be very compatible. It was just a matter of getting Jane to see it that way. That was the big obstacle. It was also why she was in the bullpen so early, so early in fact that she knew Jane wouldn't be there. She wanted to talk with Sergeant Korsak. They were friends and she trusted him more than Angela to not blurt her secret to Jane.

Maura swallowed stepping out into the bullpen. Just as predicted the man she wanted to see was seated at his desk. She placed a cup of coffee next to his keyboard. "May I speak with you about a personal matter, Sergeant Korsak?"

The man in question looked up from his desk and around the homicide bullpen as if he wasn't sure she was talking to him even though she'd said his name. A personal question? He raised his eyebrows, this should be good. "Sure doc, have a seat." He pointed to the empty chair next to his desk.

Maura sat. "Before I begin I want to know if this conversation can just stay between the two of us. Can I trust that?"

Korsak nodded looking Maura in the eye. "Cross my heart." He said with the hand signal.

Maura took a moment to choose her words carefully before beginning to speak. "So there's this person that I like in a romantic way, it's a new development to say the least." Korsak tried to keep the smile off his face. Maura didn't seem to notice. "But I don't know if they like me back and we're friends. So if I told them and they didn't feel the same way, it would change everything and not in a good way."

Korsak raised an eyebrow at the slightly flustered medical examiner. "But if…this person feels the same way and you kept quiet then you're both missing out on the chance of something great."

Maura nodded. "That's true."

"Look," Korsak leaned forward in his chair. "We both know you're talking about Jane here." Maura's face heated in a blush. "I want Jane to be happy and I want you to be happy. As far as I can tell she likes you too even if she may not know it yet," If he wasn't so old he might've felt a bit awkward about the direction in which this conversation was heading. "Jane needs someone strong enough to deal with her. If you think you can tame the wild beast, I say go for it. But I've seen greater men than you fail. So if you want to be in it for the long haul, you gotta be willing to fight." He laughed. Maura thanked him and left the squad room refraining from telling him that she was not a man, but maybe that was the point. After all why send a man to do a woman's job?

…

Jane was sitting in her chair with her feet propped up on her desk while she sipped her coffee. She should've been doing her reports or something useful but her heart just wasn't in it. She sighed taking a long swig from her cup. She hadn't seen Maura all day. She'd probably scared her off with her stupid question. Why would she even ask that? It just slipped out of her mouth without thinking. She didn't even want to date Maura. They were friends, best friends. And Maura was a woman. She considered herself an open minded person but she just didn't think of Maura that way. But she couldn't help but think there was something…_something _strange, something abnormal about their relationship. It was enough to put a small sliver of doubt in the otherwise solid thought. She bit her lip before dropping her feet back to the ground.

"Hey!" She jumped turning around to see Korsak and Frost walking towards her. They both looked like they were about to mean some serious business. "We got the sketch back and we ran it through the database." Frost said.

"We got an address, Jane." Korsak said with a grin.

She stood to her feet with a wicked grin on her face. "Let's get him."

…

There were different levels of anger, Jane was pretty sure she was pretty close to the top. They drove all the way out to their suspect's house. The three homicide detectives stood by their trunks and pulled on their bullet proof vests. They stormed into the building, walked into the suspect's apartment with the landlord's help with their guns drawn. And he wasn't there. Instead they got a call from Lieutenant Cavanaugh that he turned himself in and was waiting in interrogation for them to come back. Jane did not like going on wild goose chases, especially if said goose chase sent them halfway across Boston and back during rush hour traffic with an older homicide detective who was once again on some health regime diet thing that made him pass gas like a depleting air mattress. By the time they got back to the precinct she was in such a foul mood that neither Frost nor Korsak protested when she let them have the interview.

She rolled her eyes as she stepped into the steel elevator. Maybe she could leave work on time for once after the guy confessed and then she could drown her anticlimactic field chase in alcohol and greasy food. She stepped off the elevator her hand going to her side to disengage the right strap of her Kevlar vest. She was already sweating in places she shouldn't be sweating. She shook her head. Why did it take their guy four days to man up? Yeah, sure, it made her job easier that he turned himself in and there were still things that needed to be figured out but easy wasn't always fun. Jane sighed stepping into the morgue.

Immediately she could tell something was off. It was strangely quiet. She took a look at her watch. It was after hours, nearly seven PM. Everyone was probably already home. The only person left should be Maura. "Hey, Maur, I'm back.'' She called to the empty room. There was no answer. Jane looked around the room narrowing her eyes. Maura was probably in the bathroom or her office. There was probably no need to worry, no need to be alarmed, no need to un-holster her weapon. But she found herself re-strapping the Velcro on her vest and her left hand moved to her weapon removing the strap for easy access. _This is nothing, _she told herself, _Maura is going to come around the corner and look at you like you worry too much. You'll both laugh and then you'll go out and wallow at the Robber while she complains about your eating habits. She'll take you home and you'll watch whatever movie she has picked out. Everything will be fine. Because this is nothing and everything is fine._ Reiterating the words did internal monologue did not quell her nerves. The words didn't ease her rapid heart rate or the fine sheen of sweat that was now forming across her forehead from her nervous energy. In the pit of Jane's stomach something just _felt _wrong. "Maura?" She called again hating herself for sounding so scared. This wasn't just her, it wasn't just Frost or Korsak or some suspect; this was Maura. Jane had an immediate flash to being in this very morgue calling for Maura and getting no answer. She thought she lost her for good then. Jane took her gun from its safe place. That wasn't going to happen again, ever. Not on her watch. "Everything is fine." She tried again this time out loud. But the words were empty because suddenly she heard a heavy sounding thud and what sounded like a muffled scream.

Her eyes grew wide as adrenaline flooded her system. It seemed like she was going to get her heart pumping chase either way. Jane sprinted in the direction of the sound with her gun drawn. Her ears and instincts took her to the loading bay at the very back of building. A big hulking man held Maura Isles as she kicked and struggled, digging her expensive heels into the ground. He seemed to be having a hell of a time with the petite doctor. She raised her gun, not that she would even risk using it until Maura was out of the line of fire. "Police! Let the woman go!" The man turned around looking up at her with wide eyes. That was when she noticed he had a gun and that gun was pointed at Maura's head.

His eyes darted around the loading bay as Jane stepped closer. The medical examiner was still struggling in his arms. The eyes of the woman coming towards him made his skin crawl. Gangster or no, he was terrified. This was not part of the plan. He was just supposed to bring the examiner to a secure location so she could tell them how one of their members died and who could possibly have done it. Then they were going to let her go. It was supposed to be simple. He was not expecting the petite doctor to put up such a fuss. He was not expecting a female detective to be down there. It was all just too much. He didn't want to die but most importantly he didn't want to make a mess. His boss hated messes. In fact, the only reason he was doing this stupid run was because he made a mess of the last job he was in charge of. He figured he might be able to outrun the detective if he didn't have the extra baggage on him so he did the only rational thing he could think of and threw the doctor to the side taking a couple of hurried steps backwards. His gun though was then pointed at the detective. She yelled again taking hurried steps closer. He looked around. Surely, he could still leave. Surely, the woman would stop to check on her friend giving him plenty of time to escape. But he was wrong. The detective merely glanced at the woman on the ground before advancing with a new level of rage in her eyes. She yelled again. Not knowing what else to do, not knowing a way out, he pulled up his gun pointing it at her. Maybe if he shot the cop he would be able to leave without notice. They'd be too distracted by her injuries to follow after him.

Jane let out a small sigh of relief when the man tossed Maura to the side out of harm's way. Just to be sure Jane hurriedly stepped in front of where Maura had landed. The woman looked scared but much to Jane's relief she seemed relatively uninjured and hidden behind a steel crate was not in mortal danger if they were to break into a gun fight. She gave Maura a look that clearly said 'don't move' before stepping forward once more. This guy was seriously pissing Jane off. She had no idea what the hell he wanted or who he was working for but he was not complying with her authority. She gripped her gun tighter. "Drop your weapon!" He did not comply. Instead he raised his gun higher. She knew it was going to happen before it did. It was written all over his face; she wasn't surprised. They both shot at the same time.

The force of the bullets knocked both parties off their feet and to the ground. Maura was still hidden behind the crate. She had no idea what the man wanted from her. He just tried to grab her and pull her out of the morgue. She struggled but he was far too strong for her. The sound of the gunshots echoed in the hollow area of the loading bay. No matter how many times she heard them she still found herself flinching. She heard the distinct sound of bodies hitting the floor and then silence. Her heart was racing as she crawled out from her hiding place. She saw the man who tried to kidnap her unmoving on the ground several feet away from her. He was just a blip on her radar as she only had eyes for Jane. Her right leg was bent at the knee and Maura could hear a distinct groan coming from the detective's mouth. Maura walked the few steps towards the other woman before falling to her knees beside her. Jane's eyes were tightly shut, her face screwed up in pain. She was breathing heavily and unevenly. Maura threw the sides of the blazer to the side. Her eyes were wide. There was no blood. Jane was wearing a vest. "You're wearing a vest!" Maura cried touching the fabric. "You're wearing a vest."

Jane groaned in response. Her chest was heaving. The feeling was similar to getting body checked in field hockey and ending up on her back with all the air knocked out of her lungs. She couldn't breathe, her muscles were tightening, clenching in response to the pain now sweeping through her body. She clenched her jaw, breathing through her nose to try to bring some semblance of control back into her system. She tried to breathe like Maura taught her in yoga but she couldn't think. She heard heavy footsteps and sirens. _Danger. _The word echoed in her tired mind. _Maura. _There was still danger, Maura was still in danger. She needed to get up. It could hurt later, she needed to make sure Maura was okay. She pushed up on her elbows only to have a steady hand hold her down. "Maura."

"I'm right here." Maura said reassuringly. "I'm right here."

Jane groaned in response forcing herself to sit up and open her eyes. She grunted with the effort and held her side in pain. She didn't care about the motion or the ruckus going on around them. She only had eyes for Maura whose hand was on her lower back keeping her sitting up right. Maura was clear of injuries except for the redness around her neck. Jane hoped it would not turn into a bruise. She leaned into Maura's touch, resting her head on her shoulder as she forced slow even breaths from her nose.

Maura turned to Frost who was looking at them worry clearly evident in his eyes. _Paramedic, _she mouthed to him. He nodded before running off to find someone. He had heard the sound of gunshots from inside the interrogation room. Maura could hear Korsak yelling at someone in the distance. She looked around taking in her surroundings. The man that tried to take her was being loaded into an ambulance. Korsak and Cavanaugh were speaking sternly to a group of solemn looking officers all of different ranks. Detectives from various departments were in the well-lit area taking pictures and collecting evidence. Maura couldn't help but think that this moment in her morgue with people surrounding them, protecting them, was what it meant to be a part of something big. She'd never had a team before but now because of Jane, because of her work, she found herself in the middle of a group that was notorious for its blue bond and loyalty.

"Detective?" Maura turned towards a blond haired woman whom she'd seen at crime scenes before.

Jane looked up noticing the uniform. She pulled away from Maura's embrace and grabbed Frost's offered hand to help her stand. She winced after letting go of his hand before bending over at the waist. "I'm not going to the hospital." Jane said her voice thick.

Maura was about to open her mouth to speak but the paramedic beat her to it. "I know. But I'm sure everyone here would feel much better if you at least let me look at it."

"Fine." Jane conceded. She swallowed hard. "But I'm not taking my shirt off in front of everyone."

"Never would've pegged you for the self-conscious type." Frost laughed trying to lighten the mood.

"Shut up." Jane mumbled. She straightened herself up to a slightly lilting version of her full height. She hissed through gritted teeth as she walked around a bit to hopefully shake off some of the pain.

The paramedic turned to Maura shaking her head slightly at Jane. "I'm Lindsay. Dr. Isles, right?" She extended her hand. Maura shook the offered hand with a nod of her head. Her eyes were following Jane's movements. "Do you have a private space we can take the stubborn detective to?"

"Yes." Maura nodded. "Jane?" She pointed in the direction of the morgue.

Jane looked at where Maura's finger was pointed. "Yep." She mumbled nodding her head and followed the two women into the room. She followed the two women into Maura's office with a slight hitch to her normal swagger. Maura pulled the blinds and shut the door. Jane took a look at the situation. A doctor, a paramedic, and a detective all in one room, there was a joke in there somewhere if only she could find it.

Her blazer was the first to go. She watched as Maura hung the item on the coat rack by the door. She undid the Velcro straps of the vest and took it off before unbuttoning her shirt. "That's good detective." Lindsay said walking to stand in front of her. "What side was it?"

"Left." Maura answered for Jane. "I think it's around her fourth or fifth rib."

Lindsay shot Jane a knowing look. When Jane was still on patrol the two worked in the same sector. Jane narrowed her eyes before Lindsay reached a hand inside the open shirt and placed pressure on the area in question. "Ow." Jane breathed.

Lindsay turned back to Maura. "Definitely the fourth or fifth rib." She said with a nod. "Take a deep breath." Jane did as she was told. "It doesn't feel broken, might be a fracture though. You'd need an x-ray to be sure." She pulled her hand away and started taking off her gloves. "It is in my professional opinion that you are going to have to die another day." Maura looked appalled but Jane snorted. Lindsay started packing her things. "We have got to stop meeting like this Jane." She said with a smile before picking up her bag and opening the door.

"That's it?" Maura asked.

Lindsay turned to the medical examiner. "She doesn't want to go to the hospital. I can't make her." She placed a hand reassuringly on Maura's forearm. "She's okay."

"But you said she needs an x-ray."

Lindsay shrugged. "If you can talk her into going to a hospital to get one, all the power to you."

After she left Maura turned to Jane. "I'm not going Maura." She crossed her arms over her chest defiantly.

"Jane."

"I'm fine, Maura. You heard it straight from the horse's mouth."

Maura narrowed her eyes, she'd never understood that particular colloquialism. "You got shot."

"You have an x-ray machine in the morgue don't you?" Maura was silent. "That's the only way you're going to get me to have one."

"You keep trying to turn this place into a hospital, Jane." Maura hissed taking a step forward. "I don't like seeing you on my table. I don't want you on my table at all, but you keep putting yourself there." She sighed. "Go." She pointed to the door. "Go lay down on the table with your arms at your sides and I'll give you the x-ray." She said resignedly pointing towards the door.

An hour later after giving statements to both Korsak and Cavanaugh and being told they got Friday through Sunday off Jane found herself getting into the passenger side of Maura's stupid blue Prius. Jane sighed as Maura drove out of the parking lot. She was exhausted, hungry and in pain. "You're staying with me tonight." Maura said breaking the silence.

"Maura, I'm fine." Jane sighed. She could now add frustrated to the list as well.

Maura tightened her grip on the steering wheel. "I know." She snapped before taking a slow even breath. "I know, you're fine because you're always fine. But I'm not." She turned onto the street. "So just let me…take care of you."

Jane looked at Maura. "Okay." Maura physically relaxed into the driver's seat. The drive continued on in silence. Jane looked out of the window. They passed a closed for the night bakery, Jane's stomach growled. "That sounds good."

"Hmm?"

"Um, cupcakes, sound really good right now." Jane admitted leaning back into her seat. She was caught surprised when at the next intersection Maura turned on her blinker and turned into a parking lot of a twenty-four hour grocery store. "What are we doing?" Jane asked.

Maura grabbed her purse. "Getting cupcakes." She said matter-of-factly.

Jane raised her eyebrows, but did not contradict. If Maura was willing to let her eat cupcakes after nine pm then she wasn't going to argue with that.

After their small venture into the store Maura parked outside of Jane's building. "I'll pack you a bag." Jane nodded her head slowly leaning against the window. Maura walked into the building turning the key into the lock of apartment 112. Jo Friday yipped excitedly running circles around her feet. Maura was not prepared for the onslaught of emotions that hit her in that moment. _If this were a crime scene…_Jane's words once again floated through her head. This day could've ended very differently. She could've been coming to Jane's to pick up Jo Friday for good. She could've been walking into her dead best friend's apartment. Her stomach clenched at the thought. She swallowed hard. She shook her head as she walked into Jane's bedroom. She wasn't going to cry. Jane was okay and she was okay and everything was fine. She fanned her face with her hands trying to cool down. She took the duffle bag from the top of Jane's closet and started placing folded clothes into it. After packing a suitable amount of clothing for the extended weekend, Maura headed back outside. She opened the door to the backseat allowing the little dog to jump in before placing the duffle bag on the seat next to her. Jane jerked awake in her seat. Her hand immediately went to her side. Maura got in and started the car. Twenty minutes later Maura gently shook Jane's shoulder to wake the sleeping detective. "Jane we're here."

"Oh." Jane said with a yawn as she sat up. Maura carried all of the bags as they walked inside her house. Jo Friday bounded over to Bass sniffing his shell excitedly. "I swear she likes it here more than she does at my apartment."

Maura hummed in response as she put away the ridiculously unhealthy food Jane wanted. In the store it started with cupcakes and ended with two cans of Reddi Wip, a six pack of rootbeer, vanilla ice cream, and cherries. Jane pulled herself up into a sitting position on the kitchen counter. Ignoring the pain in her side she tried to open the plastic cup cake container only to have her hand slapped away. "Maura!" Jane groaned with a pout.

"Not until you put some ice on that." Maura pointed to her side. "You'll feel better. Have patience." Maura dug for something in her hall closet before coming back to the kitchen.

"You have a first aid kit in your closet?" Jane asked.

"With you around one can never be too far away."

"Hey!" Jane shouted.

Maura chuckled. "Take your shirt off."

"You know," Jane said shrugging the button up off her shoulders leaving her in only a tank top. "That's the second time in less than a week you've told me to take my shirt off. I'm beginning to catch on to your ways Dr. Isles."

Maura blushed. "It's been killing you not to joke about it hasn't it?"

Jane grinned. "Yes." She pulled the hem of her tank top up grimacing as she pulled the thin black garment over her head. She dropped it next to her and gripped the counter as pain coursed through her body.

"Well I appreciate the effort." Maura couldn't help but stare at the constricting muscles in Jane's arms and her tight abs. Jane had said her nickname growing up was Rolly Poly Rizzoli. She could never imagine seeing a Jane that wasn't in supreme physical fitness. She swallowed hard. Her growing attraction to Jane was starting to get out of control. She grabbed a bag of peas from the freezer and wrapped it in a small thin towel. She let her fingers grace over the red and purple area, she knew in the coming days the color would get darker and the pain would get more intense. Jane's skin was hot underneath her fingertips. She felt smooth skin become rigid as the muscle below contracted against her touch. Maybe Jane did feel some level of attraction to her as well, maybe it wasn't all just one sided. She placed the cold compress to Jane's side. The detective hissed. "Sorry."

"S'okay." Jane gritted out. Maura was standing so close to her she could feel her body heat. When Maura pressed into her to wrap the ace bandage around her abdomen Jane felt uncomfortably hot inside regardless of the freezing ice pack on her side. Finally when Maura stepped away and she felt like she could breathe again. Maura bent down unzipping the duffle bag and handed Jane a black BPD t-shirt.

Maura walked to the sink to wash her hands. "Thank you."

Jane furrowed her eyebrows. Her hand paused over a cupcake with baby blue frosting. "For what?"

Maura turned around leaning against the counter in front of the sink. What was she supposed to say to that? _For jumping in front of bullets for me, for saving me? _There were too many things she was thankful to Jane for so she settled for the one sentence that summed it up for her. "For being you."

Jane felt her face flush. She shrugged picking up the cupcake. "I'd do it for you any day." She said quietly picking at the wrapper on the cupcake.

"Why?" Maura prodded taking a subconscious step forward. _Say it, _she thought, _say it and I'm yours._

Why? Jane swallowed thickly. People weren't supposed to ask why when someone offered up something like that. Why was not a proper reaction. Maura was supposed to smile and say, 'aww Jane' like she always did when she said something extra sappy like that. She wasn't supposed to say why. "Because…" She trailed off. Because it was Maura, because it's what she did, because Maura was her 'LLBFF.' Maura was her best friend and she would do just about anything in the world to make sure she stayed on the planet a little longer. "It's what I do." She shrugged taking a bite out of the cupcake in her hands. Her eyes rolled into the back of her head as a soft moan escaped her lips. Jane could tell Maura was about to get serious again and she'd had enough serious for one day. "This is so good, Maura you've got to try it." She held the half eaten cupcake out to her friend.

Maura shook her head. "I don't like to eat heavily sugared foods before bed."

"C'mon Maura," Jane said waving the cupcake in front of her friends face. "For me?"

Maura sighed stepping forward. "Fine, but just one bite." Maura leaned forward. If her eyes were on Jane and rather than the cupcake she would've noticed the suspicious grin on Jane's face. But as such she was not prepared for what Jane had in store for her. The second her upper lip touched the blue icing Jane shoved the entire cupcake into her face. Maura squealed jumping back. Jane couldn't stop laughing. The dog barked. _This _was the why, Jane reasoned. The look on Maura's face, the squeal, the laughter – it was worth a thousand bullets and she would gladly take them all if it meant she got to see the pure and utter shock on Maura's face in this moment. Jane would follow Maura to the edge of the universe and back again if it meant she could cause that smile that showed off her dimples or hear that laughter that came from deep within her stomach. She would follow Maura wherever she went because it was Maura. There was no big giant flashing neon sign telling her in great detail why Maura was so important, she just was. Maura was her best friend and life wouldn't be the same without her in it. That was all she needed to know.

Maura wiped the icing from her eyes with her left hand before grabbing the can of Reddi Wip. She shook it and took the cap off before Jane could even stop laughing. Before Jane knew it her entire face was covered in foamy whipped cream. It was Maura's turn to explode into laughter. Jane wiped her eyes with her hands. Maura looked at Jane from head to toe. "You definitely need to get out of those pants." She blurted. Maura could see dark eyebrows underneath the white cream skyrocket. "I mean," She stuttered. "They are dirty."

Jane looked down at her pants. Sure enough blue icing was smeared across one thigh and little drops of whipped cream were scattered across the black color. "I think I need a shower." Jane said laughing.

"Me too." Maura laughed. Jane grabbed her tank top wiping some of the whipped cream off her face with it. "You did not just do that?" Maura gasped.

Jane laughed. "It's machine washable." She extended her hand to Maura. "Help me down." Maura grabbed her hand to give her some leverage as she slid off the counter. "You smell good." Jane mumbled with a sniff of Maura's face.

Maura didn't dare look at Jane's face. It would be too easy to lean up and capture her lips in a kiss. It would drive them apart because Jane still seemed unaware of things and she'd already almost lost Jane enough for one day. "It's the icing." She said softly the smiles and laughter quickly fading.

"Maybe." Jane shrugged. "You always smell nice though. Unlike me." She took a step away from Maura. "I stink. That vest made me all kinds of sweaty. I'm going to take a shower."

Maura nodded. "If you need anything…"

"You're down the hall and a staircase away, I know." Jane said with a sweet smile.

…

Jane didn't know how long she lay in her bed after the shower unable to sleep. Images of Maura's terrified face haunted her every time she closed her eyes. It was easy to laugh and joke about things in the light but darkness was always when everything ate at her, haunted her. Frustrated with herself she stood from the bed. "C'mon Jo, let's see if Maura's awake." She padded slowly down the hall and up the stairs before opening Maura's bedroom door. The woman lying on the bed was still. Jane could just see the outline of her chest rise and fall. She was just going to sit and watch Maura breathe until she fell asleep but then Maura's soft voice called out to her.

"Jane?" Maura turned the bedside lamp on.

Jane bit her lip as she looked at her feet to Jo. "You know, Jo, she was having issues getting comfortable in there. We didn't pack her nightlight and she was afraid of having nightmares. She sleeps better with you around." Jo looked at Jane with her head cocked to the side then back to Maura. Jo whined a little before sitting on Jane's foot with her head hanging low.

Maura couldn't help the small smile playing at her lips. "I guess I'll take her, but only if her owner lays down with us."

"Okay." Jane sighed in relief. Jo jumped up from the floor making her way to the rug on the floor of the bed. "She bounced back fast." Jane mumbled. Maura chuckled. Jane lay down on her back next to Maura.

"Jo is welcome in my bedroom anytime." Maura said softly reaching over to grab Jane's hand.

"Good to know." Jane said softly. "She appreciates it."

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**A/N:** This chapter worked out better in my head hah but for future reference: Do y'all mind the super long chapters (like this length)? Or would you want me to split them?

Thanks for reading!


	9. The Exception

**A/N: **Oh my goodness, y'all are really amazing! Thank you so much for all the kind reviews for last chapter (this whole story really.) And thank you for always answering my questions! Shorter chapter, but it's a Thursday update (but just barely hah) so that should (hopefully) make up for it. I'm still going to post a chapter on Saturday/Sunday like I have been doing but yeah. Thanks so much! You guys are the best!

**Disclaimer: **Don't own the characters. Not making money. ETC.

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The sun was filtering in through the light curtains of Maura's master bedroom. Maura was slowly coming to consciousness from a night of relatively good sleep considering the events of the previous day. Jane, she noticed, was curled into her side. One tan hand was wrapped around the fabric of Maura's silk sleep shirt bunching the fabric up in a death grip as if she were afraid Maura would jump up and leave or disappear in the night. Dark curls spread across Maura's left arm as Jane's head rested on her chest, her ear right over the place Maura's heart was steadily thumping a rhythm in time. There was a comfortable weight on her lower half as she took in the feeling of one of Jane's legs on top of her own.

It wasn't often that Jane clung to her in sleep. Occasionally they woke up face to face half a foot apart (or less depending on whose bed they were in.) But it was only rare mornings, like this one, where she awoke to the pressure of Jane's body pressed against her own. Those were the days of Hoyt or Doyle, moments when one or both of their lives had been threatened. The first time had been after retired detective Kenny Lehey held a gun to her head in the morgue during the tail end of the Boston Strangler cases.

It was very early in their friendship. It was also the first time her life had ever been threatened at all. She was never fond of guns. She knew their purpose, why they were important, but she'd done enough autopsies on people who had been on the wrong end of a barrel to know they were not for the faint of heart. When he pulled the gun on her it was all she could think about. She thought of all the arteries, veins, muscles, and nerves he would hit if he shot her in a particular place. But then Jane, in all of her black slacked and three quarter sleeved glory came rushing in. Jane always came rushing in seconds before the final bell ready and willing, armed but not always in armor to slay the dragon. Jane saved her that day. Tried and true, it was a time tested notion that Jane would always be there to save her.

That was the breakthrough moment in their friendship. It was the first time her life had been threatened, the first time she had to physically hurt someone, and the first time she had ever been to Jane's apartment for an extended period of time. One was not like the others but that was how their friendship always worked. Nothing was ever easy. They couldn't start out with a simple request for a movie or dinner at each other's houses. No, it was after Hoyt they started slowly getting to know each other, Hoyt again when Jane chose her as a safe haven over brothers in blue, brothers in blood, or a mother that would personally see to it that that monster never put his hands on her daughter again. And it was after Lehey that Jane didn't ask but told Maura that she was staying at her apartment that night with the detective. Maybe Jane knew Maura didn't have an army ready to take up arms for her honor. Maybe Jane could see through the cold, factorial façade the medical examiner carried with her like a badge of honor but instead saw a lonely woman. Maybe…She could play that game all morning. With Jane, who kept her cards very close to her chest, she was always resorted to the childish game of 'maybe.' Whatever the reason, a friendship was ignited that night.

They talked for hours about their likes and dislikes: sports, music, food, et cetera, et cetera. There were lengthy discussions about each and every topic. It was a clashing of cultures, a middle-class, home grown, South Boston native pitted against a well-traveled, highly educated, socialite. It never should've worked. They shouldn't have ever been able to have such a great game of back and forth, push and pull. But somehow they found a way. It was like they were playing the longest tennis match in the world. Every time they would fight the ball would hit the net. The game would halt in a standstill as both were far too stubborn to retrieve the bouncy, yellow ball until one of them would finally cave.

When Maura awoke that morning in Jane's bed with Jane's arm wrapped tightly around her she knew the detective's armor wasn't as thick as she liked people to believe. She knew even then that she was the only one that was able to see that particular side of Jane Rizzoli. It was a side of Jane where she wasn't all pant suits and no nonsense ponytail and badass, where she wasn't just one of the guys but a hybrid of everything, of all boy and all girl, of sharp angles and soft spots. She was a myriad of all things, a heavy composition between Beethoven and The Rolling Stones.

The ever growing attraction she felt for Jane could no longer be tamed. She couldn't shove those feelings away or pretend they didn't exist. But most importantly, she couldn't continue deceiving herself or keep making excuses. They were real, they were there, and she needed to act accordingly.

In present time, she brought her right hand across her body letting it gently rest against Jane's hip. Was it wrong? She didn't think so. The thought held her conscience as she let the hand travel over the slight expanse of exposed skin between tank top and pants. As her fingers ghosted over tan skin she felt Jane sigh a quiet murmur into her chest. The sleeping detective straightened her leg but left it still slightly over her own. Maura took a slow breath inhaling the scent of Jane's lavender shampoo. She continued to stroke the skin beneath her fingertips lightly finding herself being lulled to sleep in the process. Just as her eyelids fell for a final time, just as her hand stopped making nonsensical patterns, just as her breathing evened and the tension left her body her bedroom door burst open with a bang.

Angela Rizzoli burst into Maura's bedroom knowing her daughter would be there. Jane always ran to Maura when she needed reassurance. "Jane Clementine Rizzoli!" She shouted. Jane jerked awake blinking rapidly. "You get shot in the line of duty _again _and you don't have the good grace to call your own mother?" Jane groaned but kept her head on top of Maura. "And you!" Angela rounded on Maura. "You nearly get kidnapped and don't bother to tell me?" Before Maura could say anything the blanket that was around their waists was thrown over both their heads. She bit her lip to keep herself from laughing. But just as quickly as the blanket was thrown over them it was ripped away. Jane shivered at the cold before sinking further into Maura. "What am I going to do with you?" Angela huffed before storming out of the room hands thrown to her sides and face turned towards the ceiling.

Jane groaned again this time rolling away from Maura and onto her side of the bed. "You almost got kidnapped." Her voice was soft as she spoke.

Maura looked over at Jane who was staring at the ceiling with a hand to her bruised side. "You were shot."

Jane turned looking at Maura. "We're both still here."

"Yes, we are." Maura reassured with a steady nod of her head.

"But," Jane paused for a yawn. "We won't be if we don't deal with Ma soon." Jane made no move to get up. The use of the word 'we' was not lost on Maura. She had an army now to fight for her because of Jane. The least she could do was get out of bed no matter how comfortable it was.

Maura stood briefly giving her tired body a small stretch before walking over to Jane. She extended her hand. "Come on, up."

Jane grunted but relented in the end. Without thinking she put her left hand in Maura's and pulled herself up. "Ow! Dammit." She quickly let go of Maura's hand before clutching her side.

"You have a hairline fracture in your fourth rib Jane!" Maura admonished. She pulled the bottom of Jane's grey tank top up swiftly ignoring Jane's slight protest. Her hands once again found the bruising that marred Jane's side. Jane took a sharp intake of breath at Maura's touch. "When we get downstairs I'll give you the peas again and some Aspirin for the pain."

"Not in front of my mother." Jane requested in an even solemn voice.

There was a pause. "You must have been horrible to deal with injuries as a child."

Jane gave her a crooked grin. "You have no idea."

Angela chose that moment two walk in on the two of them again. She took in her daughter's raised tank top, Maura's hands on Jane's abdomen, their close proximity, the wild hair, and their heated faces. "And you don't even tell me you two are dating?" Angela huffed.

"Ma that's not –" Jane tried to interrupt. She stepped away from Maura, yanking down her tank top in the process.

"No, no, it's fine, Jane. I'm not mad." Angela insisted, slowly backing out of the room. She knew they weren't dating. It would've been more obvious if they were, she just loved trying to get a rise out of her otherwise steadfast and stoic daughter. "Like I've said before, I've always wanted a doctor in the family." Her voice was further and further away as Jane chased after her mother to try to get her to understand leaving Maura alone in her bedroom.

Maura took a deep breath and let it out slowly. At least she knew Angela wouldn't disown Jane if her unvoiced hopes came into fruition, not that she ever thought Angela would. The Rizzoli matron loved her children far too much to stay away from them for too long. Not that it would ever happen anyway, Jane didn't (or couldn't, she hadn't decided which yet) feel the same way. It would blur too many lines for the detective and change her entire thought of self. It would simply be too much. With a sigh, she turned to her bathroom to get ready for the day.

She came out not long after with her hair thrown into a proper ponytail. She walked down stairs to find Jane talking to Jo Friday and Bass through mouthfuls of an omelet while sitting on one of the barstools in front of her kitchen counter. Maura smiled slowly before entering the kitchen. "Hello."

Jane looked up, her face slightly turning red for getting caught talking to the animals. "Hey, Ma made us breakfast like two minutes ago, yours is in the oven." She pointed with her fork. "And your coffee." She pointed again the space next to her. "And the paper." Maura noticed half of it (the sports and cartoons sections) was in front of Jane's plate while everything else was in front of Maura's spot.

Maura smiled taking her plate from the oven and sitting down next to Jane. "Where _did_ your mother go?"

"She had to go to work." Jane answered before taking a sip of her coffee. "She told me that we were not to leave the house all day and if we needed anything at all to call and she'll come over or send Tommy or Frankie." Jane snorted. "If I weren't so tired and sore I would want to go into work today just to spite her." Maura laughed shaking her head at Jane's words. "Oh, I fed your turtle." Jane said with a nonchalant shrug.

"Tortoise." The honey blond automatically corrected. She took a swallow of her own coffee. "Thank you for that. I'm glad the two of you are finally getting along."

"Hey!" Jane snapped laughingly. "That was his fault for making all those noises when a serial killer was after me and you said something about how I was disrupting his 'routine,'"

Maura laughed before cutting up her own omelet to eat and unfolding the paper to read. Jane sent a small glance to her side to watch Maura as she read. She loved the way her eyes narrowed as she read a particular paragraph and the way she bit her bottom lip and pursed her lips as she read through the fashion section. She was glad Maura was in her life. The pain in her side was quickly becoming a nonissue as she watched Maura.

After a few moments, when both their plates were cleared, Jane stood taking them both to the sink before putting them in the dishwasher. Maura turned to her. "Since we're on house arrest, what did you want to do today?"

Jane shrugged. "Watch TV I guess." Maura nodded somehow the thought of TV watching with Jane sounded so much more interesting than TV watching without Jane. They sat on the couch. Maura handed Jane the remote control. It took a few channel switchings and a few minutes in the TV guide but eventually Jane landed on TV Land. A show called Cagney and Lacey was on, they were actually running a marathon of it. Jane grinned bumping Maura's bicep with her hand. "I loved this show growing up! It okay if we watch this?"

Maura nodded her head. Hours later Jane had migrated from her seated position on the couch a foot away from Maura to a lying position with her head in Maura's lap. She was fast asleep while the other woman ran her hands through her obsidian curls. It was a moment like that morning where they were both asleep in the same bed. How many more moments could she have like this before Jane figured her out? How long could she hold it together before she imploded? She looked away from the television to Jane's face. The hard angles and frown lines seemed to disappear, Jane always looked younger in sleep.

There was a slight knock on the front door before it opened revealing Angela once again. She had two Tupperware containers full of food in her hands. She looked at Maura with a smile on her face before gesturing towards the kitchen. Maura heard her refrigerator door open and close before Angela's steps sounded nearer. Angela paused in the hallway before the door staring at her two girls a moment. "You know, Maura, I've never seen my Janie lean on anyone as much as she leans on you." She gave a soft dry laugh. "Not even me."

Maura furrowed her brows. "Jane doesn't lean on me." It was true. Jane was not a leaner. She was self-sufficient to an annoyingly high degree sometimes. Most of the time Jane wouldn't even tell her if anything was bothering her. Out of the two of them, Maura was the leaner.

Angela raised her eyebrows before giving Maura a pointed look. God, they were hopeless! She pointed to their positions. "That's leaning." She nodded slowly letting a small smile come onto her face. "If you two get hungry, there's some food in the fridge. If you need anything, you know where to find me."

Maura nodded, still slightly lost in thought. "Thank you, Angela." She said absently in a voice quiet enough not to wake Jane but loud enough to still be heard. As the door shut her thoughts drifted. Would Jane have ever leaned on Casey like this? Or Dean? Would she have let either of them have all of her the way she subconsciously did with Maura? Or was she the only exception? This line of thinking led her down another road to another question: If she was the only exception, _why_ was she the only exception?

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**A/N: **I'm kind of in love with this chapter and I hope you liked it too!

Thanks for reading!


	10. A Betting Game

**A/N: **With this story I hit these moments where the chapters pretty much just write themselves and then I hit other moments where trying to write them is so so hard and takes hours upon hours because I keep getting distracted. This chapter was of the second variety.

**Disclaimer: **Not making money. Don't own characters. ETC.

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Monday morning when Jane and Maura showed up for work holding coffee cups from the same place something was definitely strange. So much so that the duo had to stop in the middle of the lobby for a moment and exchange raised eyebrow glances before both shrugging and getting on separate elevators. People were staring at them and occasionally giving each other excited glances with under the table fist pumps. Jane thought it was just because she'd taken a bullet. Near death experiences of colleagues tended to rattle a few cages. But unbeknownst to the homicide detective that was not the reason for everyone's strange behavior.

No, it was because they saw Jane Rizzoli literally put action to the words 'I'd take a bullet for you', they saw the great detective actually _lean _into Dr. Isles in pain as she sat up after taking one to the chest. Sure, leaning into the person next to her would have been normal for anyone else, but not her. Detective Rizzoli didn't lean. On anyone. For anything. She stood her ground. She bent over at the waist, grit her teeth, pushed away those that tried to help her up. _Maybe _she'd lean against a wall or a building but never a person. Only, on Thursday they saw her lean against Dr. Isles. They saw her walk away to get examined by a paramedic, get an x-ray, and get sent home for the entire weekend without any fuss. Jane had been with the force for nearly fifteen years and she just didn't do that for anyone. So people talked. Cops were especially known for gossiping. Word traveled about the headstrong detective and the cold hearted medical examiner both of which didn't seem near as headstrong or cold hearted around each other.

There was a betting pool going around to see when they would get together, who'd make the first move, how it would happen. In fact, someone in the building was getting paid at the very moment for the simple fact that the two came in together that morning. It was so much easier to talk about a could be relationship between two people that seemed to be made for each other regardless of their gender rather than the alternative. Which was how in the hell Boston Police Headquarters seemed to be one of the least safest places in Boston and the fact that two of their own were almost killed right under their noses. Harmless betting pools were much easier to talk about.

But of course they were all just rumors in the end. There was no pile of bills locked in Sergeant Korsak's desk drawer. There was no list of things to bet on, no ledger, no teams, no scheming, no nothing. That was the story and everyone was sticking to it.

…

At lunch time Jane walked into the morgue, more out of habit than actually needing to be there. What she found was Maura wrist deep inside a cadaver and she finally understood. The fact that men and women were turned on by Maura wearing black scrubs (which usually meant she was in the middle of an autopsy) always felt like some weird kink that people had. She never understood what it was about the black material that made married men stare at the doctor with the most disgusting, sleazy look on their face while Maura was bent over a body. She never understood how that did it for them. She always just chalked it up to a school teacher type of crush. But walking into the morgue with Maura bent over a cadaver in those incredible black scrubs she finally got it.

Maura was being Chief Medical Examiner, Dr. Isles. She was talking to a small group of young soon-to-be doctors. Half of which, Jane noticed, didn't seem to be paying attention to Maura's voice at all but rather_ other_ parts of Maura. Jane leaned against the doorframe.

She had seen Maura dressed in the highest level of fashion imaginable. She'd seen her wearing designers she couldn't pronounce from places she hardly remembered existed. She'd seen Maura sweaty from a hard run or work out with no make-up on whatsoever. She'd even seen Maura in her own boxers and an oversized t-shirt with her hair in a complete mess. But it was here in the basement of Boston Police Headquarters – in Maura's lair – that she felt a wave of attraction for the doctor so strong she had to laugh.

Jane always knew Maura was attractive. With the way a wide, bright smile could get her to the front of a line at a coffee shop or a free drink at the bar it was obvious. But she had never been attracted. Or maybe she was attracted. Maybe when she was drunk or when their lives had been threatened. But it was never so strong that she had to stop and think about it or catch her breath or stare. Because she was. She was openly staring at Maura's ass in those scrubs. It was so wrong. She had become a dirty old man. And she wasn't the only one.

What was it about those scrubs anyway? Jane pondered the thought briefly before deciding that it was the way Maura acted while in those scrubs, where she was full on Dr. Isles examining bodies, solving crimes, and exuding all the confidence in the world. It was not however how the dark material contrasted against her pale skin or the way her normally slightly curled hair was pulled back into a no nonsense ponytail bun thing_. _It wasn't the way her eyes scrutinized the body before her or the way she quietly murmured to herself while poking and prodding with her scalpel. It wasn't even the slight Irish temper that dripped dangerously in her voice when people tried to contradict her science. No, it was none of that, or perhaps it was all of it. Perhaps it was everything. Perhaps it was just Maura.

Maura could rock a Chanel something or other or Jimmy Choo heels or Louis Vuittion purse. She could rock Lulu Lemon athletic apparel with just as much class. She could make grown, married men (and women for that matter) do a double take in just about anything she wore. But it was in those scrubs that she not only turned heads but kept their gaze. And it was in those scrubs that Jane finally admitted to herself for the first time that she was attracted to her best friend. She could feel her face heat up at the thought. She shifted nervously against the doorframe.

Maura seemed to have dismissed everyone for lunch while Jane was in the middle of this revelation. Maura walked up to her friend after throwing her purple gloves in the correct disposable area. "Jane?"

Jane jerked her eyes to Maura's. "Hmm?"

"Do you want to grab lunch?"

Jane nodded her head. A few minutes later they sat together in Maura's office. Jane was tossing her French fries around on her plate, playing with the food rather than eating it. Maura had thankfully changed out of her black scrubs and was now wearing a black skirt and a red button up top. This outfit was not doing the detective any favors either. She felt uncomfortably hot everywhere. _They almost died. _If she could just get the nerve to just ask why it was that every time they almost died did she feel the biggest level of sexual frustration imaginable (because she refused to admit it was anything deeper than that) she would. But as it was, she was Jane and she did not admit to having any kind of sexual anything.

Maura was staring at her friend, worry clearly evident in her face by the slight crease of her brow and the tiny frown lines by her lips. "Do you want a bite of my salad?" She asked testing the water. She held out a fork full of leafy greens towards the dark haired woman as some sort of incentive.

Jane shook her head. "I'm not really hungry." She mumbled before crossing her legs. She just wanted to figure out the circus that was going on in her brain.

Maura nodded her head slowly, knowingly. "You hardly ate anything all weekend. You didn't eat breakfast this morning." Maura paused. Jane was still sitting on the couch staring at the table all stoic and weakly brave. She tried to find the words for her next sentence. Jane was like a dear sometimes, she didn't want to spook her and send her running off at such a speed she could never catch her. "I bought you cupcakes on Thursday because I know that you don't eat." Jane turned her head slightly in Maura's direction but didn't fully face her. Maura could see her jaw clench and knew she was treading on very thin ice. "You don't eat, after it happens, for days sometimes." Hands balled into fists. "It – it scares me. So when you said you wanted cupcakes that's what I purchased because I thought you'd eat them and you did. But you haven't had a real meal in three days." Jane shrugged before crossing her arms. Maura shook her head. Jane was shutting down, already. "You have such an excellent poker face that even I, a person well versed in neurobiology, can't even dictate what it is your feeling based off the movements of your facial muscles."

"Your point?" Jane asked leaning forward throwing a fry onto her plate. She knew what Maura was getting at. Maura was going to ask her the big 'do you want to talk about it' question that everyone seemed to always ask her and in doing so Maura would change the game. That question was not part of their dynamic. Maura never asked. It was implied. It was a look or a soft touch. It was never a voiced concern. Why was Maura changing the game all of a sudden?

"My point?" Maura asked flabbergasted. "My point is that you're my best friend, Jane. And a buildup or cortisol is dangerous. It raises your blood pressure and puts undue stress on the heart which in turn could be very damaging to the longevity of your life."

Jane snorted. "My blood pressure is fine Maura."

"Jane." And there it was, not in so many words, but there it was nonetheless.

Jane rolled her eyes and crossed her eyes arms again. "If you want to talk about something then talk." She snapped. "No one's stopping you."

"No one's stopping me?" Maura laughed. "Look at yourself! Your body language just exudes 'don't talk to me.' After it happens you always do this. You check out for days."

"After _it _happens?" Jane finally turned to Maura with her eyebrows raised. "If you want to talk about it so damn bad why don't you actually say it?" She looked at Maura with fire in her dark brown eyes. "You almost got kidnapped and I got shot. For all intents and purposes, we almost died. This," She gestured between the two of them. "Is exactly why we would never work." She didn't know what possessed her to say something like that, what caused her to even think there could ever be a 'we' or 'us' between them. They were both mostly straight, they were best friends, and they worked together. So why was she the one that kept bringing it up?

Maura rolled her eyes. "What exactly are you looking for in a relationship then, Jane?" The conversation had somehow ended up skirting dangerously close to a line she wasn't fully prepared to cross. "Do you want someone like Agent Dean? Someone who couldn't care less about you if they tried? Then you should've been with him, because anyone who has ever met you or is willing to be in any sort of relationship with you is going to worry about you at one point or another. I've never had anyone that worried about me or that looked for me when I decided to shut out the world like an angry teenager but then you came along. And you have so many people that care about you. It's not fair that you get to worry about everyone while no one gets to worry about you." Jane couldn't help but notice how the green shade in Maura's eyes seemed to take over the golden color as her anger rose.

"What do you want me to say Maura?" Jane snapped. Maura jumped back in her seat completely not expecting Jane to speak so loudly. "How does one go about talking about their screwed up shit? Am I supposed to cry into your shoulder? Tell you how I don't sleep most nights? Do you want to know about the nightmares?" Jane shrugged. "We're surrounded by death all the time. Do you think I even want to think about mine? If I talk about every time I almost die I wouldn't be able to do my job anymore. When I'm going down a dark alley or rounding a staircase I can't be thinking that I could die." She shook her head at Maura. "The stuff that I've seen would eat me alive if I let it. So I don't. It's that simple. However I choose to cope is my business and no one else's." Jane finished turning away from Maura before she could even respond. "I have paperwork to do."

Maura sat in stunned silence alone in her office for several moments. "You are my business." She said to the empty room. It was a phrase she used once to combat Jane's defensive behavior after another shooting. One where Jane wasn't wearing a vest. One where she had shut everyone out of her life for almost a full three months, even her mother which was no easy task. The phrase made Jane roll her eyes but that night Maura had also put action to words. She physically dragged the detective to her feet and made her go to her own award ceremony. She sighed. She could never understand why Jane had to be so strong all the time. Between Maura's inability to understand feelings and Jane's inability to let herself feel things they were quite a pair. Maura pushed her salad away, suddenly not hungry anymore. She changed back into her scrubs before walking back out into the morgue.

…

Later that night Jane found herself alone at the bar of The Dirty Robber. All day people kept giving her knowing looks that she knew nothing about. It was like they all had some big pow-wow that she missed out on over the weekend (which was exactly why she hated taking days off!) Then there was the realization that happened in the morgue. Because really, she couldn't be attracted to her best friend in any shape or form because Maura was…Maura was a woman. She was…was like a…a sister? The thought made Jane make disgusted a face. Definitely _not _like a sister. Maura was just…was just Maura. She just couldn't be attracted to her in any light because it would ruin it. It would ruin everything. Finally, there was the fight she had with Maura in the morgue. She sighed. She was just having a bad, weird day. It was like she came back from an awesome weekend and stepped into the Twilight Zone. She picked up her glass of scotch and took a sip.

Sergeant Vince Korsak walked into the bar to find Jane where he knew he'd find her. He took the seat next to her. He always felt the need to talk the junior detectives up when they were feeling down. Yes, he still considered Jane a junior detective even though she'd been around a while. He could still see that young kid who was so eager to make a difference in her eyes sometimes. He hoped she would never lose that. "Penny for your thoughts?" He asked sliding a penny onto the table in front of her.

Jane laughed picking the penny up. "Not worth more than a penny huh?"

The older sergeant shrugged. "Inflation." He nudged Jane's arm. "What's up kid?"

"Everyone's acting weird." Jane said quietly flipping the penny around with fingers. "It's like," She paused. "Like everyone wants me to figure something out but they won't tell me what it is I'm supposed to be figuring out." Korsak raised his eyebrows, this might be easier than he thought. "And Maura's mad at me." She took another drink. She didn't usually offer up her thoughts but Vince was different. He was her mentor and she looked up to him.

"You have a crush on the doc. Probably more than a crush actually." He said with a shrug as if he were saying 'Oh, it's going to rain today.'

"Excuse me?!" Jane shouted getting several looks from random people around the bar.

"You just don't want to admit it." Korsak continued undeterred. "Not to yourself or Maura or anyone. But you're happy when you're with her. The force that pulls you two together is so strong that everyone sees it now. That's what everyone wants you to figure out. Look," He put his hand flat on the bar. "You would follow her to the ends of the Earth and back if she asked you. You look to her before you make really big decisions whether you realize it or not. You come in together in the morning most days. You're already dating, you just don't know it yet." He finished with a slight laugh. It wasn't a perfect rise from the ashes, hair raising speech but if Jane even listened to him in the smallest of portions it would do the trick.

Jane's heart was pounding in her chest. Her eyes were suspiciously burning. She was going to blame it on the scotch. "What happens if I admit it?" Her voice was thick as she spoke.

"That's up to you." He shrugged. "The big question I would ask myself though is: would you regret not doing it? Having been in your position before, I do regret not telling the person I want that I wanted them and that was because I was too stubborn to admit I needed anyone. Now I'm divorced three times with nothing to come home to besides my dogs. Don't make the same mistake I did." He stood patting Jane on the shoulder. "You should go home, get some rest. You've had a hell of a last few days." Jane nodded her head as he walked out the door. Something in his words hit deep within her. He always knew what to say to her. He wasn't afraid to cut to the chase. She always admired him for that. There was no beating around the bush like there was with her mother or Frost or Maura even. And there her mind drifted again to the medical examiner. She just couldn't get the honey blond doctor out of her head. Maybe Korsak was right. Maybe she did have a crush on Maura.

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**A/N: **I don't know, I feel like Jane's the type of person that needs someone to tell her what's going on inside her head for her to fully understand. Also I had a sort of black scrub epiphany the other day while watching that one episode where they end up on Jane's mattress with the human trafficking crime haha.

BUT Y'ALL (I'm from Texas, can't help it) OVER ONE HUNDRED REVIEWS! THAT'S NEVER HAPPENED TO ME EVER! THANK YOU SO SO MUCH!

Thanks for reading!


	11. Something's Gotta Give

**A/N: **I've only read through it once so if you catch any mistakes feel free to tell me. Also, it's really hard for me to get into Jane's head in this story for some reason hah.

**D****isclaimer: **Don't own characters. Not making money. ETC.

* * *

Maura was awake, wide eyed and staring at the ceiling of her bedroom an hour before her alarm went off. No matter how many times she tried yoga breathing her breath insisted on coming in short gasps and small puffs of air through her parted lips. It was the end of the week now and the third time waking up like this. It was as if an invisible person was squeezing her throat, sitting on her chest, making her unable to move or breathe or function. The invisible hand felt very much like the real arm that was around her that fateful day. The day where Jane got shot, for the second time, and where she was nearly kidnapped, also for the second time. How did they always end up in situations like that?

In the quiet of her bedroom she could still feel the man's arm, the crook of his elbow underneath her chin. She could still feel the cold metal of the gun on her temple, his sweat and cologne stuck to her like a second skin. She could still feel that way his stubble scratched her cheek, still hear his erratic ragged breathing coming from his mouth directly into her ear. But worst of all she could feel that fear rise in her throat in the middle of the night. The mere thought of someone in her room, in her house, uninvited and unwanted had almost forced her into sleeping in the living room on more than one occasion. One night she went so far as to sleep in the guest room because the sheets still smelled like Jane. And Jane was everything that was safe and secure. And maybe some of that safeness would rub off on her, sink into her pores and make her just a smidgen more brave and courageous.

Thinking of Jane sometimes was like a double edged sword in these types of situations. On one hand Jane was everything she needed and on the other she almost lost Jane that day too. She always almost lost Jane. When would the day come when the detective's sacrificial side overcame her? When would the day come when Jane wouldn't come home that night? Or any night? Maura gripped the sheets beneath her until her knuckles were white. She had no idea why this one incident was different. She didn't know why she was having such a strong reaction this time when every other time was so much easier to brush off. Maybe it was because she hadn't seen Jane very much the last four days. All the other times they were almost attached at the hip. They had breakfast and lunch and dinner together until the uneasiness wore off, until their hands stopped shaking and until they stopped jumping at inconsequential noises like Bass fumbling around in her kitchen. But this time Jane wasn't there. Maura overstepped by voicing a fear. She overstepped and Jane had been distant ever since.

It was easier to ignore their life or death experiences, to shove them off to the side with a smile and a laugh, when Jane was there to initiate the joke to keep her from crying or to throw a tissue at her or fix her a sandwich. She had gotten so used to life with Jane that she could hardly even remember life without Jane. So when it was just her with her racing mind and the quiet still of her dark, lonely house all those feelings she shoved down deep into her stomach overwhelmed her. It wasn't just this one experience either, it was everything. It was about falling for her best friend. It was about Ian and Garrett and Dennis and her mother and her father. It was about neglect and never having the courage to ask for what she wanted. It was all those tiny spaces she could never fill and the way no one seemed to understand her at all. It was about always being the odd one out. And she hated it. She hated all of it.

Three AM was so very loud.

Her grip on the sheets only lessened when her alarm went off. When she stood to shower she felt as if she hadn't gotten any kind of sleep at all.

…

Jane sat at her desk going through the motions like she had been for the last four days. Korsak's little smack in the face had sent her spiraling into a never ending circle. She had no fucking idea what the hell she was supposed to do. She hadn't really talked to Maura since their little argument. She hadn't grown the courage to even be alone in the same room with the doctor. She didn't have any cases going on. She was to do paperwork but she couldn't concentrate on the tiny words on her computer screen. Instead she propped her feet on her desk and stared into her coffee cup asking herself the same question she'd been asking herself for three days: did she really have a crush on Maura? And again, she had the same knee jerk reaction she had every time. She was a thirty-five year old fifteen year veteran of the Boston Police Department. She did _not _have "crushes." Crushes were for hopeful, naïve, young, people. They were for people who hadn't given up on, well, on anything. And Jane had given up on so much already. But if it wasn't a crush, then what was it?

She bit her lip blinking slowly. If she could just lay out a list of facts in her head she could use her detective skills to surely figure it out. After all, if it looked like a duck and quaked like a duck then it was probably a duck. So she thought about Maura, which she seemed to be doing a lot of lately.

She had a routine with Maura. It was a routine that no man – or anyone – had been able to break. She had movie nights and pizza days and a workout schedule with Maura. Maura knew how she liked in her coffee, her eggs, and her steak. They laughed at each other's jokes most of the time. She _craved _the doctor's presence in a way she had never craved for anyone else. It was like she was tethered to Maura by some sort of rubber band. They could spend time a part but they were always connected. Korsak had been right when he said she would follow Maura to the ends of the Earth and back if she asked. But the biggest thing was that Jane knew without a doubt that Maura accepted her for all she was. She stayed while everyone else walked out. And wasn't that all she really wanted?

Then there was the physical side. Like the way butterflies exploded in her stomach when Maura stood close enough she could smell that wonderful perfume of hers. Or the way that Maura's entire face lit up with each and every genuine smile. There were all those times she'd been half awake, half asleep while Maura rubbed her back or her hip or ran her fingers through her hair and it felt good. It felt right. She had not been around someone where everything was just so effortless in a long time, if ever. The way Maura's touch could make her skin burn and make goosebumps trail her skin and make her breath catch was all very knew to her. But it happened. Her body seemed to know something before her brain could even catch up. Then there was that epiphany that happened in the morgue the other day. So yes, she was physically attracted to Maura.

Jane swallowed hard. She liked Maura. She liked Maura in a completely inappropriate manner. She couldn't deny it anymore. She was officially out of the river and on dry land coughing and sputtering up all the water she inhaled but there nonetheless. Her chest tightened. This was not supposed to happen. It was not how she planned her life to go. She ran a slightly clammy hand over her face. Maura was her best friend. She deserved better than whatever scraps Jane could give her. Jane was broken, damaged, riff-raff, low-class. Maura was the complete opposite of all of that. Maura needed someone that knew how to eat food that stared back and what the difference between a pencil skirt and an A-line skirt were. Maura deserved someone that could give her the moon and the stars. Jane couldn't even give Maura half of any of that. She sighed.

It was like a twister had come into her apartment in the middle of the night , sucked her up, and dropped her in a place that looked the same and felt the same but was suddenly so very, very different. She couldn't find the ruby red slippers that would take her back nor could she find the yellow brick road to move forward. Instead, she was stuck in a weird state of flux, neither here nor there, that was covered in a layer of fog so thick she couldn't even see her hand in front of her face. She had no direction, no signs, no way to know which way was the right way.

For the first time in a long time she actually wanted to talk to someone. But she pushed everyone away so often there were no more strings to pull on or hands to help her. They all just knew she wouldn't talk no matter how often they offered so they stopped offering. God, none of this was supposed to happen. She ran a hand over her face once more before standing on shaky feet. "I'll be in the gym." She said gruffly before leaving the bullpen.

…

Later that night Maura walked into The Dirty Robber alone. She hadn't seen Jane all day. She was kind of happy about that. Space was a good thing, especially when she was in her current mindset. Seeing Jane would only make everything worse. She just wanted to forget. She wanted to find someone that would make her forget. She wanted to get drunk and wake up in some stranger's bed. She wanted that nightmarish ragged breathing that she heard in the still of the night to be replaced by a different kind of breathlessness. She wanted to forget about near-death and actual death and guns and blood and unfortunate crushes on certain homicide detectives.

Around midnight she knew her plan had failed. She had talked to three men. All of which would've done anything she asked, she had them wrapped around her finger so much. But she couldn't find it in herself to ask that daring question of 'your place or mine?' The entire time she felt dirty. She felt like she was cheating on Jane in a relationship that didn't exist. At that revelation the shots were thrown back at rapid speed. She wound up sitting at a table full of detectives from all kinds of units with names and faces she definitely wouldn't remember in the morning.

After that it was beer and wine and tequila and guns and blood and free drinks with men that smelled funny and she was so unbelievably tired. At some point the bartender cut her off. She couldn't remember when or why or what was said but when she demanded another round he shook his head.

…

Jane had no idea how long she'd been asleep when her phone rang loudly near her ear but it was long enough to start drooling. "Rizzoli." She husked into the phone eyes still closed.

The first thing that registered in her sleepy mind was the background noise. There was music and cheering and it was far too late – or was it early? – to go to a crime scene at a club. She groaned. "Hey, it's Frost. I just wanted to tell you that Doctor Isles is going round for round with the Narcotics and Drug Unit guys."

"What?" Jane yelled sitting up on her bed.

"I've been keeping an eye on her, but the bartender just cut her off. I think you should come take her home before someone else does."

"The Robber?"

"Yup."

"'Kay, I'm on my way. Thanks." After hanging up Jane stood from her bed. She threw on some pants she found on the floor and grabbed her keys. How could Maura even go round for round with those guys? Didn't she know how they looked at her when she wasn't looking? Jane knew from experience those guys didn't drink any of the frou-frou stuff Maura drank. They drank tequila, whisky, and vodka. They did shots and weird concoctions, not fine wine or cabaret.

It wasn't hard to find Maura when she arrived at the bar. The medical examiner was surrounded by a large group of men. They were all playing darts. One detective was standing behind Maura "showing" her how to throw a dart. Maura leaned into him with _that_ smile, the one she'd seen personally set to work on numerous occasions. Something inside Jane snapped. She stomped over to the group. Everyone turned and pointed. The detective behind Maura stepped back. "Hey, Rizzoli!"

Maura turned around. "Jane!" She stepped – stumbled – forward and threw her arms around Jane's neck before the taller woman could even react. Suddenly all one hundred fifteen pounds of Dr. Maura Isles was pressed against her front as Maura's lips left a very gross, very slobbery kiss on her cheek. Jane vaguely heard catcalls going around the bar. She tried to glare at them all but her mind seemed to only be on one track. All she could process was Maura. The way the smell of the alcohol mixed with her perfume was somewhat intoxicating on its own. She couldn't help but notice the way Maura's body fit snugly next to hers or how easily her own hands found their way to Maura's hips. Maura was talking nonsense in her ear…something about the origin of darts or beer or groups or something equally meaningless. The guys were still staring, high-fiving each other, and shooting her knowing looks. She could've sworn she heard someone say something along the lines of 'get it Rizzoli!' with a whistle for added bonus. She rolled her eyes before paying Maura's tab and dragging the medical examiner to her car.

Somehow they stumbled up the entire flight of stairs and somehow Maura still managed to walk in those ridiculous heels of hers piss drunk better than Jane could ever do sober. Jane sat Maura on the sofa and watched as Jo Friday trotted over and jumped onto her second favorite lap. Content that Maura wasn't going to fall over and suffocate on her couch Jane walked into the kitchen to make Maura a peanut butter and fluff sandwich and a glass of water.

"Janneeeee." Maura called from the living room in a sing-song voice. "I need to talk to you."

Jane took a deep breath and squared her shoulders before walking into the living room with plate and glass in hand. "Yeah, Maura?"

"I'm sorry to say this," Her head was towards the ground as she spoke. "But I need to be a composite number. And," She hiccupped with a slight giggle. "I've been a prime number. I didn't even know that until tonight." Jane couldn't help the laugh that escaped her mouth. She'd never seen Maura drunk before and she had to admit now that they were in a quiet place with just the two of them she found it mildly hilarious. "Don't you get it Jane?"

Jane shook her head before moving to sit next on the coffee table. "I don't do math when you're sober. I definitely can't do it when your drunk. Speaking of," She picked up the triangular cut, crust-less half of the sandwich and held it out to Maura. "How much did you have to drink?" Maura stared at the bread with an eyebrow raised as if she didn't know what it was. "Eat." Jane said waving the food around. Maura laughed before leaning forward and taking a bite out of it from Jane's hand. Jane's eyebrows shot up.

"I lost track."

"At what number?"

Maura shrugged. She leaned forward grabbing the food item from Jane's hand the glass of water. She took a long gulp and a huge very un-Maura like bite. There was silence while Maura ate. Jane had no idea what to say. She knew people didn't just drink like that, _Maura _didn't just drink like that. In their five year span of knowing each other Jane had never seen Maura piss drunk. She'd seen her tipsy, a little moody from one too many glasses of wine but never…never like this.

"Why, Maura?" She finally got the nerve to ask.

"We have to break up, Jane!" Maura threw her hands in the air. Jo Friday leaped from her position on Maura's lap with a sniffle and a jingle of her collar. She looked at Maura almost reproachfully before trotting to her own bed. Jane furrowed her eyebrows. What the hell was Maura talking about? "We need to spend some time a part from each other because I can't think when you're around me and I can't breathe and I can't do this anymore!" She shrugged exaggeratedly like she was throwing off some kind of weight she had been holding. "You're dumb and rude and bossy and insufferable." Jane raised her eyebrows. Maura's eyes softened. "But you're also kind and smart and funny and warm and you save me, Jane. You save me all the time. I couldn't sleep with anyone tonight because I felt dirty. It felt like I was cheating on my girlfriend. I don't want to cheat on you, Jane." Maura paused. "You're…You're everything and you're in my head and I can't think. And I like you. I like you too much and I need to stop. So we need to break up. But we're not dating." Another pause. "Why aren't we dating, Jane?"

Jane had that tightness in her chest again, the kind that left her breathless and winded. "I – I don't know, Maura." Jane replied weakly. She leaned forward bushing the hair away from Maura's forehead. "I don't know." There was a long stretch of silence. Jane could see Maura's eyelids drooping further and further. There was so much she wanted to say, so many things to talk about. Would Maura even remember this conversation in the morning? Maura leaned dangerously forward. Jane swallowed her own nerves before leaning down and gently taking off Maura's shoes. She pulled the honey blond to her feet. "C'mon, it's bed time Dr. Isles."

…

Maura awoke the next day a little after noon alone in a bed that wasn't hers and in clothes that weren't hers. She couldn't remember much of the night before. She remembered going to the bar. She remembered drinking and flirting with random men. She blinked rolling over onto her back. She was at Jane's apartment. How did she get there? She was wearing a pair of Jane's boxers and a BPD t-shirt. How did she get into them? Where was Jane? It was this reason that she never liked to drink in excess. The black outs and the hangover were perfectly fine reasons not to drink. The first time she'd ever been drunk was when she was seventeen in France right after exams were over. Then there was the one time in college after Garrett left and now this. She ran a hand over her face. Why did she do this to herself? Obviously, if she wound up at Jane's her plan backfired. She needed a break. She needed to take a long weekend to just go somewhere alone just so she could get her head right again. She needed to wash the feelings she had for Jane right out of her system. She sighed quietly before rolling back over onto her stomach. That would have to wait. She tugged the blanket back over her head. All she really wanted to do was sleep.

…

Jane was at the park running at an unforgiving pace. Her form was awful and she was making weird faces but she didn't care. She didn't care because she was aiming to beat herself up. The pain she felt in her lungs, her legs, her hands was all welcomed. She wanted to forget all the things Maura drunkenly told her the previous night. She wanted to not think about relationships or kissing or hand placement or the way Maura's body felt against her own. She didn't want to think about drunken surely unremembered confessions. But as always everything she didn't want to think about was there at the forefront of her mind. She felt like a bomb she'd been holding in her hands for a while finally exploded and she couldn't hear or see or think because her ears were still ringing and the light was still so bright.

All her life her first instinct had always been to jump in front of danger. When she was a kid it was about the adrenaline, the thrill. It was about jumping in front of a bully and putting him in his place. As she grew older the risks became higher, the danger greater, bigger things than just her reputation were on the line. In the real world the danger was an incredibly accelerating car or a basement or a handgun. There were real bullets and real people and real lives at stake. She had a high pressure, high risk, high reward job. She could look a serial killer or a dirty cop or a jealous murdering wife in the face and say the things that weren't meant to be said. But Maura, Maura was a totally different kind of danger. She wasn't prepared to jump in front of that, she wasn't ready. And she needed to be ready before she decided to change everything.

She didn't know how long she'd been gone but by the time she got back to her place Maura was nowhere to be found. She left a note on Jane's refrigerator saying that she went home. Jane let out a breath of air she didn't know she'd been holding before sitting down with a bottle of beer. It was definitely going to be a long, long day.

* * *

**A/N:** Hope that's not moving too fast?I have most of twelve written out. I don't know if I got it across well but I was trying to go for Maura drinking because of everything, all the things. Because at some point all of the stuff that overwhelms you...just something's gotta give (And hence the chapter title!)


	12. Finding Common Ground

**A/N: **I had so many different versions of this chapter written out at one point I had six different word documents and a spiral notebook open. Hope you like it!

**Disclaimer: **Don't own the characters. Not making money. ETC.

* * *

The realization that Maura was gone hit her like a ton of bricks. Maura was gone and she had so much to talk about, so many questions swimming through her head that her apparently ill-timed run had done nothing to quell. She numbly sat, leaving her beer forgotten on the coffee table. Maura liked her. Maura liked her in the same way she liked Maura. _She liked Maura_. God, that was a strange thought. It was all a series of strange thoughts. But then life was strange and she was not a runner, in any sense of the word. She was Jane Rizzoli, she faced her problems head on with a gun, she didn't duck out. She didn't know the meaning of giving up. When her back was against the wall she fought to get on even ground, but that was in her professional life. Her personal life was very different. The lines often blurred between what _she _wanted and what other people wanted for her. Most of the time she stood her ground but that didn't mean she wasn't plagued with doubt every once in a while. She just needed to figure out her head first, and that was where she was having the majority of her problems.

Being with Maura came with so many conditions and terms and by-laws created by her own mind it was hard to navigate through. Like how would the sex work? She felt her face grow uncomfortably hot at the thought. Could she even manage it? What if she was bad at it or Maura laughed at her? She'd never been with a woman before, not even a simple date. She'd never had the urge, it was only Maura. Then there were other thoughts. What if it was weird or they didn't work well as a couple or if taking that step took that unnamable thing away that made their friendship so great? What if they broke up? How would their friendship survive? Or if five or ten years down the road they got tired of each other? Because things like that happened every day, all the time. Her own parents, whose marriage she thought was one of the most solid things in the universe, could attest to that very notion. Marriages fell apart. Things that were supposed to last forever disintegrated. It was just how life was.

But if she was going with that line of thinking then she could argue that her friendship with Maura could also fall apart for no reason at all without warning. Maura was gone after drunkenly confessing she needed to spend some time away from Jane. Whether she remembered said confession was still up in the air but still, she was gone. So couldn't she lose Maura anyway?

But the big question, the one she'd been skirting around for fear of answering was as Korsak had told her: would she regret it? If she jumped in or walked away would she regret it? The question made her rapidly whizzing brain stop for a moment. The nonsense, the unasked and unanswered questions, the 'what if...' scenarios all started to fade. The fog started to lift and she could finally, finally see part of the yellow brick road that would lead her forward.

She wanted Maura in her life in whatever capacity she wanted to be there. She liked Maura in a more than friendly manner. If she chose to ignore the growing tension between them she could lose Maura in the end regardless so it wasn't like she was really screwing up anything. And if she went forward…Well, she didn't really know what would happen, but maybe that was the point?

She bit her bottom lip. Her heart beat rapidly in her ribcage. _Do or die, Rizzoli, _she thought, _it's your game. You've got the puck and a clear shot. Take it or pass. _It was the moment where heroes were made, she'd been in this position a thousand times over. She always took the shot. She always jumped off the ledge. Sometimes it was to near death or at the best of times to ultimate glory, but she always took the chance. She just couldn't take wondering and never knowing. It wasn't in her nature. She stood from the couch suddenly knowing exactly what she wanted. She wanted movie nights and soft awakenings and sleeping in on the weekends and her perfume and fun facts over breakfast. She wanted to be with Maura. She _wanted _Maura. Jane let out a laugh. After admitting it to herself it felt like some weight she didn't even know was there, was suddenly gone. She could finally breathe. It was like getting over a cold she'd had forever and suddenly feeling like she could take on the world again. Why was she so stupid?

She grabbed her jacket, keys, and wallet. She didn't bother with pants or a shirt, instead choosing to go in her running shorts and tank-top. She didn't want to waste any more time. She definitely didn't want to spend any more time in her own head. She just wanted to go, to chase, to stop Maura from leaving because that's what her gut was telling her would happen if she waited and kept thinking.

Once out of her apartment she stared at the night sky in confusion. Had she really been thinking that long? She stepped out from underneath the awning before shutting the door to her building behind her. She felt the rain slowly drip onto her head before it started pouring. Rain. Jane scoffed at the stupid weather. Rain. It _would _be raining. It would give what she was about to do that extra added _oomph. _She could never do anything halfway. No, the universe always deemed otherwise. So of fucking course it would be raining. Of course. She rushed out of the building pulling her jacket over her head and started her car.

A few minutes later she arrived at her destination, a certain house in Beacon Hill. She had to stop being a coward and face this, whatever_ this_ was. She ran from her car not bothering covering her head, not caring that she was already soaked, not caring about anything other than the fact that she was about to lose the one constant thing in her life. She hit the doorbell once, there was nothing. A second try reared the same result. Then she tried knocking. Jane knocked on the door for so long that she couldn't feel her hand. Maura was gone. _Maura was gone._ She was too late and Maura was gone. She was probably out on some date with some loser, a loser that wasn't such a loser because at least he could get the courage to ask her out or say he liked her or however they met. Why had it taken all of this? Why was she such a goddamn coward? She rested her forehead against the metal of the door. How could she have been so stupid? Maura made her choice and she was too late.

Jane had no idea how long she stood with her head resting against Maura's door but it was long enough for her face to go numb and her knees to go weak. What the hell was she supposed to do? Was she supposed to act like this never happened? Go home and pretend? Were they supposed to keep playing this stupid, stupid game? Could she even do that anymore? Could she even be that person still? She bit her lip. She knew the answer. She always knew the answer. She pulled her knees to her chest and put her head on top of them.

…

Maura stepped out of the taxi wearing the same clothes she wore to the gala the night before. There had been a charity event she needed to attend to represent the Isles name. But she couldn't even stay for the whole event. She was not doing the walk of shame, even though she was never ashamed. One of the other medical examiners in the city needed a consult on a case they were handed and being the Chief she had to go do her duties in the middle of the event. She had been awake for almost an entire twenty-four hours. The pounding in her head was so severe she didn't know if it was from a lack of sleep, the hangover, or because she was hungry. She was fairly certain that the only thing keeping her vertical was the seriously alarming amount of coffee running through her system and pure adrenaline. All she wanted to do was go inside her home and sleep. She didn't even notice the person on her stoop until she was standing right there. "Jane?"

For her part the detective sat up abruptly blinking rapidly like she didn't know where she was. Jane looked at Maura with wide eyes as everything finally came back to her. "Oh." She looked at Maura, the bright sunny day, the birds chirping, her eyes grew wide. "Oh!" Hastily she stood from her spot on the steps. She wiped her hand across her face. "I'm – I'm going to go. I'm sorry." She started walking.

Maura dropped her hands to her sides. She was too tired for this, too tired, too exhausted, too drained. It was just too much all around everywhere all the time, it was always too much with Jane. The detective only had two speeds full throttle or not at all. Maura needed at least a couple hours of sleep and an aspirin if she even wanted to keep up with Jane. "You stayed here all night waiting on me and now that I'm actually here you're just going to leave?" Jane stopped walking but didn't turn around. Maura shook her head. "Typical." She mumbled under her breath before she continued up her steps and put her key into the lock. Just as she was turning the knob she heard Jane's voice.

"You're the one who left Maura!" Jane shouted. "You say _I _shut down? Well look at you!" She pointed at Maura. "What do you call this?" The pot that was only just simmering seemed to boil over and no one was paying attention to turn down the heat.

"Oh, so now you want to talk?" Maura asked incredulously.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Jane shouted back.

Maura narrowed her eyes. "You asked me to psychoanalyze your apartment, so how about I psychoanalyze _you_?" She took a step down closer to Jane. "You have all of these walls you've built up over the years. Walls that rise at even the slightest hint of _anything_. You say you want someone to accept you as 'just Jane' but you can't even accept 'just Jane' yourself because you're too afraid to let other people even _think _you're human."

"You want to talk about walls?" Jane snapped her temper getting the best of her. "Fine! Let's talk about walls, Queen of the Dead, who is much more comfortable around dead bodies than she is actual people. Hasn't anyone ever told you that's a little weird? At least I'm not afraid of people."

"Well at least, I'm not afraid of myself." Maura countered softly before turning back to her door. How could she ever think Jane was any different?

Jane knew what she said was below the belt immediately. She wanted to take back everything that was just said. She just wanted to start over but Maura was once again walking back to her door. "I'm sorry." Maura stopped walking. "I didn't come here to fight with you."

Maura turned around. "Well, you're doing a superb job of that." She crossed her arms.

"Don't go."

"Why?" All the playfulness was gone from Maura's voice. How could one three letter word sound so serious?

Jane's heart leapt into her throat. The moment was happening. The big life changing, 'oh my god a comet is crashing into the Earth we have to stop it now!' moment was happening. "Because – Because you're my best friend." And she was faltering over her words already. "And – And you have a toothbrush in my bathroom!" She had no idea why the words came out as a shout or so rushed but they did. Maura raised an eyebrow at her. Jane continued. "You have a toothbrush in my bathroom. I wrote everything I wanted to say to you down." Maura could see a soggy palm sized notebook in her hand. "But it got wet." She sniffed. "And I was sitting here thinking of all the things I could say to you, all the things I should've said to you, and they all sounded…they all sounded stupid. But I kept coming back to the toothbrush. You have a toothbrush in my bathroom and it's not even one of those cheap disposable ones that you just throw away on a whim. It's one of those electric Sonicare toothbrushes. And it's always been in my bathroom. I never let anyone keep anything of theirs at my place before, but you. You have a fancy toothbrush in my bathroom. I-I sleep with a gun and all my doors locked and I still have nightmares but when you're there I – I don't. You make me feel safe. And I – I'm not the type of person that feels safe, ever. I'd rather hang out with you than – than some guy any day. You keep my beer in your fridge even though you don't drink beer. You find me when I'm lost and I can't help but feel like that all those things mean something." Maura felt her shoulders drop. "And I know you don't want to hear what I have to say because you went out last night and you're coming home this morning and I know what that means. So I'm just going to…I'm going to go." Jane ended hopelessly, suddenly feeling very, very stupid.

And just like that Maura felt all of her defenses flare. She was done taking the backseat. She was done being the pushover. She was going to show Jane just how much of a fighter she could be. "No!" Maura shouted making Jane stop in her tracks. "You don't get to do this to me. You don't get to walk away!" Her voice cracked and shook as exhaustion seeped in. "I am right here. _Right here. _And you don't get to act like I'm not. So, no. We're having this conversation, right here, right now."

It was easier in her car, Jane thought. It was easier when she was alone in her lonely apartment without even her dog because Frankie took her while she was running to 'pick up chicks.' It was easier when she was sitting on her new couch pretending to drink her beer, when the voices in her head were just voices, and no one was talking back to her, answering her questions. But standing there in front of Maura all the bravado she felt earlier evaporated into thin air. All she could think about was every relationship that ended because of her, her unwillingness to bend, her pride, her job, her stubbornness, her neediness. Everything from elementary school friends, to high school best friends to Dean to Casey to Korsak to her parents to her dad. There were so many things, so many relationships that were upended because of her. She was the opposite of Midas and she always flew a little too close to the sun. Her heart was racing. Her hands were shaking. Everything in her body was telling her to run, to turn around and leave but something in Maura's eyes held her. Something in those sad, pleading eyes kept her anchored and grounded.

"You are going to listen to me, Detective." The authoritative inflection of Maura's voice caught Jane off guard. "You're going to stand there and listen to what I have to say because I can't do this anymore. And if you walk away from me before I'm finished, I will _never _forgive you." For her part Jane stood still with her hands awkwardly hanging at her sides, head down. "You don't get to allude to there being something deeper here continuously, you don't get to tell me you feel it too and then just walk away. You don't get to give me hope. You don't – you don't get to change me and then leave." Her voice was cracking under the pressure but she couldn't stop now. She couldn't stop ever. It was like a dam had burst inside her letting out a rush of words she kept locked away, words she didn't even know she felt came crashing from her lips. "I deserve more than that. Ironically, you're the reason I even think that way. Everyone walks away from me, everyone walks out of my life and I always let them because I didn't know that fighting or telling those people I wanted them to stay was even an option. But you changed that. You changed me, you changed everything." She gave a dry laugh wiping the back of her hand across the few tears running down her face. "I've never been anyone's first choice. I've never been anyone's reason for anything. My own parents – birth and adoptive – didn't even pick me. But out of all the people in the world, I thought you would be the one." She swallowed down the lump in her throat. "You were supposed to pick me but you're not. And I want to know why? Before you walk away, before you leave my life, before you become just another face at BPD before your mother moves out and before – before everything changes, I want to know why? You owe me that much."

Jane didn't know what to say, what to do, how to act. This was not how she planned it all to go. She was supposed to be the one convincing Maura that this was right. She was supposed to be the strong one. It was never supposed to be the other way around. She was a fish out of water. She really wanted Maura to stop crying. Even more she wanted to stop her own tears from spilling over. And she definitely didn't want any of that last part of Maura's speech to ever, ever happen. It was like they were both playing chicken and they decided not to swerve at the last second. "I'm horrible to be in a relationship with." Maura narrowed her eyes through the tears she was in the middle of wiping away. Jane blinked several times. Her heart thudded in her chest. There was a long moment of silence. Blood was rushing to Maura's head making her feel lightheaded. They were at a standstill: neither moving and oh so much space between them. They were standing on two separate islands with the choice to either build the bridge or set it on fire. And Jane held all the matches. "What if it doesn't work out?" Jane's voice was quiet, reverent almost and full of so much insecurity it almost broke Maura's heart.

"What if it does?" Maura's voice was the complete opposite. So sure, steady. It was one of the greatest things about their dynamic. One was always brave and strong enough for the both of them when the need arose. "What if it's the greatest thing we've ever done? If there's even a small chance for this to work don't you want to try? You deserve to be happy, Jane. You – you could be happy with me. We could be happy with each other. If there's even a chance for us, don't you want to take it?"

A short moment passed before Jane's scared, tentative brown eyes met Maura's pleading ones. "Can we talk about it inside?" Maura nodded slowly leading them both inside.

It was different sitting in the living room at least four feet away from Maura. It was different in the light of the living room. When did it get so bright? It was different than earlier when she came rushing to her best friend's house ready with a full confession and no more excuses. That had been her saving grace the entire drive and while she waited on the doorstep for Maura's return. _No more excuses. _It sounded better, braver, bigger, in her car in the pitch black of the sky as she raced across town to stop something terrible. Because she knew in her heart – her trusted gut – that so many things had changed between them that if Maura took a break from her everything would change. So she ran towards instead of away. It seemed like a good decision at the time but now, now in the harsh light of Maura's living room and with the awkward silence threatening to suffocate her, it seemed so very stupid. There was nothing to hide behind. There were no men between them, no impending cases, no intruding mothers, no dogs needing to go out or turtles needing to be fed. It was just her and Maura. And now Jane was stuck with the thought of now what? There was so much to say, so much so that it seemed all of the words were trying to come out all at once getting stuck in the door rendering her completely and utterly speechless. "So…" Jane trailed off running a hand over her thigh.

"So." Maura said back. She was trying to keep her own feet from running, her own thoughts from spinning out of control. Jane was there, in her house. They were supposed to be talking but there was so much silence.

Jane swallowed. _You already chose, you already jumped, now you just have to keep your head above water, _she thought to herself. She could that. "Don't ever ask me to pick between you or work." It was the first sentence that came to her mind, the first thing out of her mouth.

"Jane," Maura's eyes softened as she leaned forward towards Jane on the couch. "I would never -"

Jane cut her off before she would finish. "And I want to move as fast or as slow as we both deem appropriate." She was not looking at Maura as she talked. Instead, she focused her eyes on the coffee table. "Work needs to stay appropriate, professional. Like it usually is. I," Jane paused trying to find the words. "This is…this is new for me. I've never…I've never been with a woman before. Never wanted to." She shrugged. "But you're different, you've always been different even if I didn't know it. I probably never would've figured this out on my own." She swallowed hard. "I'm not sure you remember but on Friday when you were drinking you said to me that you needed some time away and I knew then that I didn't want that. But now," She shrugged wiping the sweat from her palms on her bare leg. She wished she'd worn pants. "I'm struggling here, so you can go." She laughed softly looking at Maura.

Maura smiled kindly at Jane. She sat up a little straighter, she wanted to reach out and take the detective's hands in her own. She wanted to smooth the wrinkles in Jane's face, take the tension out of her body. This was harder than she anticipated. "I would never ask you to quit your job or take a desk position or do something less dangerous or any version thereof. I know what you're career means to you. I expect the same in return." Jane nodded her head some of the tension leaving her shoulders. "I agree to your other terms. This is," Like Jane she struggled to find the words. They never did this…this talking thing. They never sat down and revealed feelings and told things like they were. It wasn't them and she found it so much more difficult than she had initially anticipated. "This is new for me too."

Jane's head shot up. "Really?"

Maura couldn't help the laugh that escaped her. "Yes, I've never dated a woman before. And I don't want to lose you."

"I don't want to lose you either." Jane mumbled turning away again.

"I want to be exclusive." Maura admitted.

Jane laughed. "Don't like to share?"

Maura shook her head. "Absolutely not."

"Good thing, because I don't either." They looked at each other, both happy with the things that were said. Maura yawned. "You're tired." Jane pointed out.

"I haven't gone to sleep yet." She admitted covering her mouth as another yawn took her. Jane looked away. "Wait," Maura furrowed her eyebrows thinking of Jane's words outside. "I wasn't with anyone last night, if that's what you were referring to outside. Well," She thought out loud cocking her head to the side. "I guess technically speaking I was but not in a romantic setting. I was at a charity event and then I got a call for work."

"You got a case?" Jane interrupted again. "Why wasn't I called?" She always tried hard to get Maura's cases. They made a good team and worked well with each other, their conviction rate was insane.

Before Jane's thoughts could continue down the path they were headed, Maura spoke. "A medical examiner across town needed help on something, so I had to go." Jane nodded her head. She didn't question the fact that it was in the middle of the night. She knew from experience that sometimes when a case broke everyone involved had to step up no matter the time. "You're tired too." Maura said quietly pointing out Jane's own yawn.

The brunette stretched. "Yeah, your front step is as comfortable to sleep on as it sounds." Maura laughed. Jane stood and offered a hand to Maura. "Barring any kind of major catastrophe we have the day off."

"So what are we going to do, sleep all day?"

"Yes!" Jane laughed. Maura looked appalled. "C'mon, before I drag your butt to bed."

Ten minutes later after they both lay in bed on complete opposite ends of the bed. The awkwardness was back with a full vengeance. They both seemed to be stuck in their own heads. At the same moment they both rolled onto their sides to face another, their arms coming around to rest of the other's waist. They both laughed. So much had changed, but really it felt as if nothing had. "This okay?" Jane asked in a soft whisper. Maura nodded her head in content and blinked slowly already starting to fall asleep. Jane smiled pulling the doctor a little closer. She kissed the top of Maura's head before closing her own eyes.

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**A/N: **I had this incredibly sappy ending sequence planned but I'm just going to save that for another time.

Thanks for reading! (And for all the reviews and things, I'm still kind of in shock lol!)


	13. Nothing's Really Changed

**A/N:** Sorry for the delay.**  
**

**Disclaimer: **Don't own the characters not making money etc.

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Jane was the first to wake up. She blinked slowly barely catching herself from stretching as she realized there was a person soundly asleep, curled delicately into her side. She had no idea how long they'd been asleep. The light that was brightly shining in the room had seriously decreased to that gray color of early dusk. She always hated that time of day. It was a transition period for most people. They were either coming home or leaving for work. For her it usually meant going home in the middle of a case or arguing with the lieutenant for overtime pay. But right then it didn't seem so bad. She was lost in the warmth of the bed, of Maura's soft breath against her chest, of the smell of her shampoo. Jane slowly blinked bringing herself to full awareness. She looked down at the woman in her arms.

Five years, they had known each other for five years and been best friends for three. But now, they were doing something she never even thought possible. They were about to take another step into a whole new category. How was it going to work? Was it a natural progression? They both seemed to have accidently stepped into a tiger trap, fallen into the same hole and now they were stuck. She hoped it wasn't a bad kind of stuck. Everything was still confusing to her if she thought about it too hard. She had so many questions. Was this how people fell in love with their best friends? By spending all of their time together and somehow their best friend became something more? She didn't know. She didn't know anything. Maura shifted against her just barely letting out a soft audible murmur but she knew she wanted this. Maura made her feel safe – which was not a feeling she was used to. No man had ever made her feel safe. But all five and a half feet of the tortoise owning scalpel wielding Maura Isles made her feel safe.

Jane sighed letting her hand drift slowly over Maura's hip before landing on her silk covered thigh. Even with all the questions whirring in her head she knew she could definitely get used to this. Just as she was starting to drift back to sleep, she heard heavy footsteps coming towards the door. She could tell by the _shuffle-pound-shuffle_ of the person's feet hitting the carpet that it was her mother. She inwardly groaned.

It was Sunday and Sunday meant family dinner at Maura's. It was that way since Angela moved into Maura's guest house and her dad walked out. And family dinner had broadened to dinner with family _and _friends with the addition of Frost and Korsak during some meals. Maura had already successfully sealed herself in on the family side of the equation after she offered (and continued) to house the Rizzoli matron and after Jane had brought her to her first Rizzoli Family Dinner. No matter how ritualistic it was, it was a simple fact that Jane seemed to continue to forget and bemoan about. Through all of the life altering confessions that happened early that morning especially it seemed to have slipped her mind. In fact her brain didn't even pick up that it was Sunday until her mother was shouting at her, and inexplicably a somehow still sleeping Maura as well.

Maura was soundly asleep nestled into her right side with an arm and a leg strewn over her under the covers. Luckily her mother couldn't see that. She only saw Maura face resting precariously next to her daughter's boob area. Not that it wasn't normal, but it was family dinner and they both needed to get their butts downstairs, Angela reasoned with herself. Jane reached around with her free arm grabbing one of Maura's ridiculous throw pillows that somehow hadn't gotten tossed off the bed the night before and threw it in the direction of her mother. She was pretty sure that was why they were called throw pillows, Maura would probably tell her differently but they _were_ perfect for throwing. "Maura's sleeping!" She whispered to her mother. Jane glared at her mother, trying not to be distracted by her body's reaction to Maura's hand moving in sleep to the newly exposed skin of her abdomen.

"Family. Dinner." Angela glared back. "One hour." She whisper yelled before swiftly walking out of the room and gently closing the door.

Jane gently placed her head back on the pillow. Maura's right hand was resting on her lower stomach where her tank had ridden up just barely from throwing the pillow. The skin to skin contact was making Jane's body do things she wasn't entirely comfortably with yet. How could a simple touch, an innocent simple touch, make her feel so warm inside? She thought back to the moment when Maura touched her bruised ribs after the shooting. Maura had the softest, warmest hands she'd ever felt in her life. Despite whatever Maura thought she would've made a great medical doctor. She was warm and kind, it showed in the way she handled Jane when she was busted and bruised. Of course she wasn't always kind and warm, at first she was the opposite of all of that. Jane had been too. But somehow they changed each other. They smoothed some of the rough edges of their personalities out together. Her mind drifted back to the hand on her stomach and the leg over her thigh. Briefly she thought of Casey and Dean and the differences they brought to the bed. Maura's arm didn't feel heavy, she didn't feel suffocated, and cologne wasn't sticking to everything. It was much nicer sleeping with Maura than it was with anyone else. She hoped Maura felt the same way about her.

Maura's arm and leg shifted in a stretch as she slowly opened her eyes. She licked her dry lips rolling over on her back. She was still very close to Jane, her head was still on her arm. "Hey, sleepy head." Jane said in a whisper, unable to make her voice rise any higher in the quiet room.

Maura turned her head towards Jane. Everything from that morning came rushing back to her head. Suddenly, she didn't know where to look or where to put her hands. What was she supposed to do when the thing she'd been fantasizing about took a step towards happening? Or had it already happened? They didn't kiss. They didn't talk about labels but already something had shifted in their relationship. The sleeping on Jane thing was new. She'd never done it before. Jane only ever slept on her in the wake of something terrifyingly life-threatening, and tragic. She worried her bottom lip just slightly. What if Jane wanted to take her words back? Maura intertwined her fingers and rested them on her stomach. And then Jane started to feel awkward. She retracted her arm from behind Maura and yanked her tank top down. Once again, she wished she wore pants. "Are we okay?" Maura's timid voice asked breaking through Jane's clothing thought. She didn't want to ask the question, not really. She wanted to skirt around it like they skirted around everything else but after waking up from a deep sleep her filter seemed to be more flimsy than usual.

"What?" Jane jerked her head toward Maura, eyebrows furrowing in confusion. "Of course we're okay!" She ran her fingers over the scars on her hands. "Why wouldn't we be okay?" Doubt and uncertainty suddenly clung to her heart. Maura couldn't back out of…of…whatever it was they were doing. Not after she had only just figured it out herself. Maura was the one that talked about changing her and then leaving. Maura couldn't do that to her. Because no matter how unsure she was about everything she was solid in the fact that she wanted Maura. She wanted to at least try. Who knew? Maybe they wouldn't work out or maybe it would be awkward, but she wanted to at least try. Maura though sounded like it was all just talk or something. Did she not know how big of a deal their conversation was to Jane? Jane bit her lip. They hadn't done anything other than talk, did Maura already regret whatever it was their friendship had suddenly turned into?

"It was just," Maura shakily took a breath. She was trying to give Jane a back door if she wanted it, even though she hoped beyond hope that Jane wouldn't walk out of it. "We were both tired and I was drunk and I don't remember what I said but…" Then Maura stopped talking altogether. Jane noticed Maura's hands fidgeting on her stomach, her finger twisting around where her ring would be had she worn it to bed.

Jane furrowed her eyebrows. "If you're trying to give me an out, I appreciate the gesture but I – I don't need it." Jane swallowed hard. "But if you're giving yourself one –"

"I'm not!" Maura practically shouted interrupting Jane making the bed shake.

Jane snorted. "Okay, so –"

"Jane Clementine Rizzoli!" Angela shouted coming up the hallway again. How had their hour already passed? "You are in big trouble missy! It's family dinner!" Angela walked right on in the room not bothering with knocking. "I don't ask for much." She walked around the pristine room looking for something, anything to tidy. She settled for picking up the throw pillow Jane had thrown earlier. "I just want my children to be happy and healthy, and to have a sit down dinner with my children once a week." Angela fluffed the pillow in her hands aggressively before gently placing it with the rest on one of the chairs. She narrowed her eyes at Jane. "You kids keep screwing up the happy and healthy parts so the least you can give me is dinner every Sunday." Then she turned her gaze to Maura. "That goes for you too." Maura shrunk a little under her scrutinizing gaze. "I expect you both downstairs in five minutes fully dressed and ready to eat." She quickly turned on her heel with a huff leaving the two women slightly stunned in her wake.

Maura sat up in the bed just as Jane was rolling out and standing on her feet. She watched as the detective faced away from her and stretched her long arms towards the ceiling. Maura couldn't help her wandering eyes as they stared openly at the rippling muscle of Jane's toned body. The running and workouts they were doing had definitely done the detective some good, even though they had to take a short break due to Jane's injury. She wanted to crawl on the bed over to Jane's side, get on her knees, wrap her arms around Jane's taught abdomen and just breathe. She wanted Jane to lean into her touch. She wanted to kiss her neck, say something nonsensical in her ear. She wanted to feel the shiver as it went down Jane's spine, because she would shiver Maura would make sure of that. Maura shook her head at herself as Jane turned around trying to rid her brain of those inappropriate thoughts. They may have not been as inappropriate as they were before but they were most definitely inappropriate before family dinner. Jane dropped her arms and stretched her neck from side to side. Sleeping on Maura's front step was probably not the greatest idea she ever had. Maura walked into her bathroom gently closing the door behind her.

Jane narrowed her eyes at the door. What the hell was going on? She gave a frustrated sigh. _Women. _She rolled her eyes. She needed to change clothes and brush her teeth but all of her things were in the guest bedroom. Downstairs. Right next to the kitchen. Where her mother was. She let out a groan running a hand over her face. "You could always borrow something of mine." Maura's voice drifted towards her. She had changed while she was in the bathroom into a pair of lounge pants and an off the shoulder sweater. Jane could see the strap of the tank top she wore underneath. Jane knew then that it wasn't just the black scrubs or the red blouse, black skirt combo that got her a little hot under the collar. It was just Maura. God, where had this sudden attraction come from? It was like someone had shown a giant spot light on the part of her brain she didn't like to spend too much time in and now it was all she could see. It was just Maura and her crazy eye color and her form hugging designer sweats and her dimple showing smile and her unbelievably soft hands. She tried to force her eyes to stay with Maura's and not drift down and back up, but she was pretty sure they had.

"Yeah, no. I'm like half a foot taller than you so that wouldn't actually work." Jane commented sarcastically. Maura laughed with a shrug. She put the toothbrush in her mouth before walking back into the bathroom. Jane followed. "Maura, we're – we're okay aren't we?" Jane asked uncertainly. "I mean we haven't even started…this and I just…" Jane trailed off. She shifted on the balls of her feet bouncing almost.

Maura rinsed out her mouth and dried her hands before turning to Jane. She grabbed her by the hands as Jane had done for her many a time. She looked deep into Jane's dark eyes. "We both have a habit of retreating. We take these steps, we say things, and then we back off. You were right before your mother came in. I was giving you an out, in case you changed your mind. But I want," _I want you. _That was what she wanted to say but she couldn't say it, not yet anyway. She didn't trust her voice to not crack, she didn't trust Jane's reaction, and she definitely didn't trust herself to not cry. There were still so many things for them to figure out before things like that were spilled. "I want to give this a real try. I just didn't know if you still did or if what you said last night was some kind of one off. I – I don't want to force you into anything, Jane." She looked at the ground. She noticed Jane was only wearing one sock. The toenail polish for the day was a dark emerald. She smiled softly before looking back into Jane's eyes. "Especially not this, never this."

Jane smiled warmly at Maura. It was her turn to squeeze Maura's hands. "I want to try this too. I'm all in." She smirked. "Besides, when have you known me to be _forced_ into anything?" They heard their names being called from downstairs. Jane held Maura's gaze a moment longer before speaking again. "We better get down there before she has a conniption."

Jane lead the way down the stairs still wearing her shorts and tank from the day before. The white tank was hopelessly wrinkled and probably more than a little dirty, it definitely had a little musky scent to it. She was surprised Maura let her in her bed at all. She could tell both of her brothers were already down stairs in the dining area and judging by the small bark of a little dog Frankie even brought Jo Friday. She could hear laughter as the barking continued. On the last stair she looked back at Maura.

The honey blond doctor was standing behind her looking out into her living room at the semi-controlled chaos. Tommy had a toy rope in his hand playing tug of war with Jo Friday. Frankie was watching a game on the TV and Angela, always the mother hen, was chastising them both. She was telling Tommy not to hurt Jo and Frankie to not yell so loud at the TV. Jane knew from experience in a few minutes she would look at both of her grown sons swat them gently with her rag before telling them to go clean up. Jane looked back at Maura. Being inducted into the Rizzoli family was crazy on any level but it was just what Maura needed. It was why she brought Maura all those years ago to her first Sunday dinner. Maura never had a place that felt like home, somewhere she knew was safe to go if she needed a shoulder to lean on. She admitted to Jane once that she was lost and alone a majority of the time growing up. Jane hoped she didn't feel that way anymore, that she knew she wasn't alone, she'd never be alone. They locked eyes. Jane felt her breath catch in her throat. Whatever words they couldn't say they expressed in that one look. All of the questions she had were temporarily quelled.

"There you two are!" Angela said walking towards them. She hugged Maura tightly then Jane completely disregarding both of their hatred for hugs. She wrinkled her nose at her daughter. "I said fully dressed! Go change your clothes." She said shoving Jane in the direction of the guest room. Maura tried to stifle her laughter. Angela linked arms with Maura dragging her in the opposite direction to the dining room.

…

Jane sat at her desk Monday morning playing with paperclips. So far she had made a string of them that was so long it almost touched the floor from her position in her chair. She was bored. A thing they never told her when she was just joining the academy was that most of police work, detective work especially, was about paperwork. It wasn't all about guns blazing and bullet proof vests and adrenaline fueled heroics. Sometimes, but mostly not. And when those moments came and went the paperwork that followed was almost insurmountable. Normally Jane would be slugging through her mess of paperwork along with her partners, but on Friday she didn't want to think and there was no better way to accomplish that task than by doing mind-numbingly boring paperwork. Korsak and Frost, were not near as lucky. They'd been doing paperwork for hours and there was still a sizable portion left to do on both their desks. Hallway trashketball was definitely out of the question, so she sat at her desk thinking about Maura and making a paperclip chain.

Dinner the night before with her family was just as normal as it ever was. Tommy laid on the charm for Maura while he talked about another house painting job. Frankie talked about some girl he met at the park while walking Jo Friday. Her mother commented about her love life and Maura's love life (thankfully not their love lives together.) It struck Jane just how normal it was. That thing she'd been ignoring for weeks finally opened itself up to her. She had no idea when the pure domesticity of their lives happened. It must have happened after constantly finding their way to one another from a whole slew of circumstances. It could've happened after Ian or Casey or Doyle, after the car accident and making up or during their morning runs. It never hit her how much they actually _did _act like they were dating. The only thing different in their relationship so far had been a touch of curiosity for the physical to happen.

Like even then sitting at her desk in the middle of the homicide squad room she was wondering what Maura's lips would taste like. She'd never kissed a woman before, she wondered if the lipstick or lip gloss would taste weird. She let her mind drift pausing her paperclip chain for the moment. The image of her and Maura, just sitting on her couch invaded her headspace. She would say something funny and Maura would laugh. It would be that deep laugh that started in her belly and she'd end with that special dimple showing smile on her face, eyes bright and shining. They'd be sitting, maybe the game would be on or a movie neither of them were paying attention to. They'd stare at each other, gentle teasing touches going back and forth between them as they talked. The image was replaced with another, one that was purely fantasy and not entirely work appropriate. She could picture clumsy kisses and clumsy hands as they went for her belt. She could feel Maura's soft, soft hands on her abdomen traveling up, up until – _WHACK! _Jane jumped so high in her seat that the entire chair fell backwards bringing her with it. She could barely hear the laughter in the background through the blood rushing to her head. Her heart was pounding out an entirely too fast rhythm, she couldn't seem to catch her breath. The noise sounded eerily like a gunshot and she had a sudden flash of danger cross her mind before she remembered she was in the bullpen. She was lying awkwardly on the ground with her body sideways and arm almost pinned to the ground by the chair. She rolled sideways off her chair and sat on her knees. She looked up into the eyes of none other than Sister Callaghan.

"Sitting as you were with your feet propped on your desk is no way for a lady to sit." The nun chastised.

Jane Rizzoli had a certain look that could make even the most hardened criminals squirm under her gaze. Jane was glaring at Sister Callaghan with the very same menacing stare. The laughter quickly evaporated as Jane rose to her feet and tugged her blazer straight. She took a dangerously determined step forward. Korsak stood slowly from his desk. He didn't actually think Jane would sock a nun in the face but she was pretty damn pissed. With a growl Jane bent down to right her chair. She looked back at the nun. "I am a homicide detective." Her words were nearly a growl. The nun seemed unfazed. "This," She pointed to her desk. Her neat stack of paperwork was now scattered across the floor. She didn't know what came over her. She didn't know if it was pent up frustration or being humiliated in front of her people or the fact that the nun had haunted her for years as a child, but she was tired of it. "Is my desk." She bent over again to yank a piece of paper from under the sister's foot. "I deserve respect." She said icily placing the paper in her hand on her desk.

The nun raised an eyebrow. "Sitting at your desk with your feet propped up is disrespectful, and yet you _deserve _respect?" Sister Callaghan challenged.

Jane snarled ready with another retort about boundaries and why nuns shouldn't be allowed in police precincts when she felt someone grab her arm and literally drag her away from the situation. "I think you need to cool off, Jane." Neither Maura's voice nor touch eased her anger. Instead it seemed to magnify it by taking her out of the situation. She yanked her arm away from Maura's grasp and stalked off to the stairwell. Maura dipped her head before giving Korsak a glance and following Jane.

Jane took a few pacing steps to try to calm her nerves. There was really no reason to be that angry. If it was Frost she probably would've laughed. But it wasn't Frost and it wasn't some random person either. It was her and a nun she always hated, where their hatred seemed to be mutual. It was the fact that the ruler grazed her ankle when it came down on the desk and her arm hurt from falling on it. Her still bruised and fractured rib did not take too kindly to the fall either and with the way her gun pressed into her hip she wouldn't be surprised to find a bruise there later. Those were things the stupid nun probably never even though of. All she saw was feet on a desk which for some reason seemed to be on the equivalent to killing people or dating a woman, both of which she had done and was doing. She laughed dryly shaking her arm out. She should tell the nun she was dating Maura just to see her reaction.

Maura's hand was once again on her arm. Jane looked up this time without the fog of rage. "Come on, let's go down to the morgue and let me look at you."

A few minutes later Jane sat on Maura's office desk with her blazer off and shirt unbuttoned. Maura was standing between her legs as she examined her hand and arm. They both new the examination was a bit excessive but Jane was slowly developing a slight addiction to skin to skin contact with Maura. She sighed as Maura's hand went to her neck. She leaned forward towards Maura and her intoxicating perfume. "You're very tense, Jane." Maura commented. She tried to gently rub the muscle of its tension and tightness but Jane leaning towards her with her eyes slightly closed was very distracting.

"Slept on your porch Saturday night, remember?" They both stopped their movements staring at each other for a moment.

A knock on the door interrupted whatever could've happened between them. They jumped apart. "Dr. Isles there's a…" Susie Change trailed off after seeing her boss and Detective Rizzoli at such a close proximity. She cleared her throat before trying again. "There's new equipment waiting for your signature at the loading bay." She finally said before leaving them both to whatever they were doing. She grinned as she walked out. She was totally going to win her side of the bet.

…

While Maura signed the package and showed the men where to bring the boxes Jane sent Korsak a text saying she was going to spend the rest of the day in the morgue and if they needed her to just call. After the men left, Jane watched as Maura carefully took out the items from the boxes. She offered to help but Maura refused saying she it would go faster if it was just her. She liked her morgue to be set up in a specific way. Jane didn't try to argue that she knew exactly where everything was and instead sat on one of the empty autopsy tables and watched Maura.

She didn't know how long she watched Maura. It was long enough to know that Maura had nice calves. Obviously, with all the running and the heels she would have nice calves and a nice ass. Why had it taken her that long to realize all of these things? She watched as Maura walked around the open space with her white lab coat flowing behind her in self-made wind and her blond curls bounced with each step. She got it. If she didn't already get it she definitely one hundred percent got it. Maura Isles was hot, in a classy, sexy scientist, kind of way. Jane didn't even feel weird about it. It was just like 'Oh, that's what all the fuss was about.' And _she _was the one that was dating her. Jane let that sink in for a moment. She was dating Maura. She was dating her best friend. Except they hadn't even gone on a date yet. Why hadn't she asked Maura out yet? Jane bit her lip. How was she supposed to ask? "Hey, Maura?"

"Hmm?" Maura hummed still in a squat as she organized small boxes of gloves.

"I was – I was wondering," _Great start, Jane, _she cursed herself. She took a deep breath. "On Friday if you're not doing anything would you like to go out with me? As a date?" She rushed to add that last part. Was this what men felt like when they asked people out? She smoothed her sweaty palms on her pants.

The Medical Examiner broke out into a smile as she stood holding two boxes of gloves. "I'd love to!" She replied brightly.

"You would?" The words came flying out of Jane's mouth before she could stop them. The corners of her lips curved into a slight smile.

Maura laughed. "Yes."

Jane nodded her head. "Great!" She hopped down from the autopsy table. She'd been hiding out long enough. It was time to show those fools in homicide a nun didn't scare her. "Friday, I'll pick you up at seven then." She started walking towards the door. "See ya' later Maura." She called behind her.

"Oh, Jane, wait!" The detective immediately turned around a smile still on her face. "Are we still having movie night tonight?"

Jane's grin broadened. "Yeah, it's your turn to pick the movie. I've got popcorn and that wine you like. I'll order pizza."

"I'll bring the salad." Maura laughed slightly. That was always their exchange. She was glad that even though they were doing this new thing that movie night Monday's weren't changing. "I'll see you then."

* * *

**A/N: **I almost tried to squeeze the date into this chapter but it wasn't coming out right. But I have a rough version written. School is starting so believe it or not my updates will probably come faster hah. If there's any situation you want to see them in feel free to leave suggestions.

Thanks for reading!


	14. The Date

**A/N: **Y'all said you liked long chapters...*goes to hide*

**Disclaimer: **Don't own the characters. Not making money. ETC.

* * *

Maura's whole life had been based on running. People were either running away from her or she was running away from them. People were mean and judgmental so she held them at a distance. The acquaintances she made never ventured deeper than that. She was always the weird kid, that kid who liked frog dissections in biology, the kid who knew too much. No one wanted to be friends with the know-it-all. She learned to convince herself that it didn't matter, that loneliness was just a human condition, one she could live with or learn to accept. In college she put in a lot of effort to better herself as a person. She joined clubs, sororities, and took volunteer opportunities. She made friends but those friends were always an arm's length away. She thought she was destined for those types of relationships her entire life but then when she was in her early thirties she met Jane Rizzoli.

Jane was the total opposite of Maura, she didn't run from anything. She was a fighter. She stayed, weathered the battle, and came out on the other side worn and bruised but never beaten. She pushed. She stood in front of loaded guns. Maura couldn't help but wonder if that was all she ever needed. If the whole trick was to just have someone say they were there and they weren't leaving, someone that stood their ground no matter how shaky it got. Because with Jane, Maura didn't feel like running away and the detective had already surpassed all of her strongest defenses.

It was with those thoughts in mind that Maura found herself early Wednesday night heading out of her door to the sidewalk for a quick jog. She was nervous about the impending date with Jane, her best friend, and the woman that knew her better than anyone else. The thought didn't scare her, she didn't feel like running. The nerves were more of a sort of giddy anticipation for things to happen. After all, the hardest part had already happened. They knew how the other felt and they were taking the steps accordingly.

Halfway down her block she felt her mind shift like it always did midway into a run. The nerves, the unsteadiness, and anything else fell to the way side as she took each step. Her breathing controlled and her pace increased. There was just something undeniably calming about the rhythm of her forefoot strike.

…

By Thursday, Jane still had no idea what to do for their date. She didn't do dates. She didn't like them. She didn't go on them. The few dates she had been on recently were with Casey and that was weeks ago or longer. She'd lost track between all the things her life had thrown at her. And the dates with him weren't even good dates. They were more on par with a conversation over a slice and even then the conversation wasn't that great most of the time. She was sitting on her couch slowly working herself though a bottle of beer.

She didn't do dates and yet she was going on a date with Maura. Maura, who was her best friend. Maura, who was distinctly feminine and most definitely a woman. There was just something about the combination of the words 'Maura' and 'first date' that sent some emergency signal off in her brain like a firehouse alarm. There was just so much to screw up, so many things that could go wrong. What if it ended badly? What if she was a bad kisser? What if Maura was? Jane groaned dropping her head to the back of the couch. Then there were the other questions. What if they were perfect for each other? What if they were each other's other half? How would her mother take it? Yes, she had said repeatedly that they would make a good couple or that she wanted a doctor in the family or she was accepting, but when it was put into practice, in her face, in the open, would she be just as accepting? It seemed like her entire mind was filled with questions. She'd never questioned so many things in her life. Black and white, that was how she saw things. There was an answer, a reason, a motive behind everything, maybe it didn't always make since but it was still there. But this thing with Maura, it seemed every road she turned down led to an entire test full of questions. And they were the hard ones too, the ones that didn't have good solid answers but many. She had so many thoughts she couldn't even figure out where to go on their first date. How pathetic was that?

She couldn't decide if she should take Maura to some five star restaurant she'd already undoubtedly been too. (Would she wear a dress or a suit? Did it even matter?) But the thing was that they'd had dinner a thousand times together, sometimes even at fancy French places that she couldn't pronounce. And that was probably her biggest issue. She wanted the date to feel like a date. She didn't want it to be virtually two friends hanging out. She wanted it to mean something. She wanted to go somewhere simple yet fun, somewhere that would stand out. Perhaps she was putting too much pressure on herself.

She sat and she drank, not even caring in the slightest that it was a work night. By midnight and her fourth bottle of beer she finally got an idea where to take Maura for their date (because she was going on a date with Maura.) It sounded like the best plan in the entire universe. But she was pretty sure she would've found some redeemable quality about anything by that point. Someone could've suggested they go jump into a lake and eat bugs and she probably would've agreed. As it was that was, quite thankfully, not her idea. She stood on shaky feet and dug around her kitchen making a mess of everything to find something her mother gave her years ago.

…

By Friday, Medical Examiner and Homicide Detective were both a bundle of nerves. Jane decidedly stayed at her desk looking up leads on some of her open cases and Maura stayed downstairs checking her e-mail and making calls.

It was about midday when Jane finally decided to send Maura a text message about what was going to happen. She was still nervous about her little plan.

Frost raised an eyebrow looking at Korsak then to Jane. He hoped the old man got the message. Jane was shaking her head and making faces at the little screen in her hand before he would hear the furious clicking of a backspace button and a frustrated sigh. Finally, Korsak seemed to catch on. Frost smirked in his direction as Jane placed her phone face down on her desk before running a hand over her face. Four bottles of beer and falling asleep at two AM was probably not one of her brightest ideas.

"Was that an important text message, Jane?" Frost asked jokingly raising his eyebrows suggestively.

Korsak laughed. Jane glared. "Shut up." She remarked snidely before crumpling up a piece of paper and throwing it at him. There was still so much she had to do to get ready for the date, so at five she pushed away from her desk.

"Have a hot date tonight, Rizzoli?" Korsak laughed calling after her.

Jane just waved her hand back behind her. "As a matter of fact I do." She mumbled to herself once she was out of earshot from the group.

…

Maura sat back in her chair just as her phone dinged with a new message. She picked it up. She couldn't keep the smile from her face as she read Jane's name on her screen. She scrolled down reading the note.

_I'll pick you up at seven. Wear something casual, something you can move in. No skirts. No dresses. Socks are a must. Looking forward to tonight, Jane. _

Of course it only left her with questions. She couldn't help but wonder where they were going or why her clothing mattered that much and whatever that thing was about socks. She was planning on wearing one of her new dresses but it seemed she was going to have to rethink her entire wardrobe for the night. She couldn't focus on anything for the rest of the day. At precisely five pm she left to go home and to get ready for her first date with Jane.

…

At 6:59 Jane pulled into Maura's driveway. She took a calming breath. She ran the tube of chap stick over her lips. She wished she wasn't such a tomboy even in her thirties. She wished she knew things like what color lipstick worked best for her or what type of shoes to wear or style of jean worked best for her figure. She always made due with her knowledge but somehow that didn't seem like enough. Probably because she was taking out the world's most elegantly feminine women ever because for some reason beyond her capacity to even understand Maura liked her, Maura picked her. It was both terrifying and exhilarating all at the same time. Just as the clock struck seven Jane rubbed her shaking hands on her pants before grabbing the small package from the passenger seat and exiting the car. During the walk to Maura's door, a walk she was sure she could do backwards, drunk, and in a blindfold, she felt oddly like she was walking the plank. She swallowed hard touching her index finger once to the doorbell.

On the other side of the door Maura was having her own problems. She paced back and forth talking to Bass who sat diligently in her kitchen looking at her as if he were listening to every word she said. She dipped back and forth between French and English, using wild hand gestures. Through it all Bass Isles just stared at his human. "What if it's terrible, Bass? What if I've built all of this up in my head and none of it means anything?" She groaned loudly and stomped her foot in indignation. Just as she was about to go into some other excuse the doorbell rang. She looked at the door. _Oh, god, _she thought, _just relax._ She took a calming breath and fluffed her hair before opening the door.

Jane stood on the other side of the door jumping from foot to foot. Some form of adrenaline was running through her veins. She felt like she could run a marathon and then fight a bear and an alligator at the same time. After what seemed like an eternity, the door finally opened.

For a short moment they both stood on either side of the threshold. Jane inwardly scoffed. She had been worried it wouldn't feel like a date but with the way Maura's eyes roamed over her figure (and she was sure hers over Maura's as well) she knew that wasn't going to be a problem. Jane cleared her throat reaching out shyly to hand Maura her present. "I – uh – I got you these. I thought…I thought you'd like them." Jane never wanted to punch herself in the face at any point in her life more than she did at that moment. She was pathetic. She was a grown woman, stumbling over her words like a scared teenager.

Maura felt some of the uneasiness lift from her shoulders. Jane was nervous too (and if she was being honest it was completely endearing and very cute to see.) She took the small bag from Jane's hand. Their fingers touched. Their eyes locked. And again Maura was faced with the 'how had it taken this long' question. But she couldn't worry about that, because the point was that it was happening now. A slow grin formed across her face as she saw the contents of the little baggy. _Fudge clusters. _Leave it to Jane to remember something she said she liked as an off handed comment about something else years ago. "Thank you, Jane." Jane felt something go up her spine just at the way Maura said her name. _That _was something that most definitely never happened before. "That's very sweet." Maura paused to look Jane in the eye. "Do you want to come inside for a moment while I put these up?" Jane just nodded her head not trusting her voice to do anything for her.

Jane stepped into the living room and watched as Maura walked into the kitchen. She saw that her 'casual dress' wasn't all that casual but she was wearing pants so that was a good thing. She was wearing dress slacks and a maroon colored blouse that hugged her curves in all the right places. Jane coughed. She should've said something about it earlier. That was like the number one rule of dating or something to tell the person they looked nice. But Maura always looked nice. Maura turned back around after presumably putting away the fudge clusters and was walking towards Jane. The detective swallowed hard. "You look – you look great." Jane fumbled to say once again her voice having a small breakdown.

Maura grinned a light blush washing over her cheeks. She let her eyes roam over Jane's dark wash jeans and baby blue button up and a deep black blazer over the whole thing. It was so simple and so Jane. _This_ was who she wanted to have a date with, not some over the top trying too hard Jane. She was sure that time would come, but she was glad she got this Jane for their first date. "As do you."

Jane swallowed hard for the second time in less than five minutes. _Buck up, Rizzoli, _she chastised herself. She smoothed out the palm of her hand on the side of her pants one last time before reaching a hand out to Maura. "Ready to go?"

Maura took Jane's hand in her own, intertwining their fingers together. She didn't have to look down to know they fit perfectly together. "I take it you're not going to tell me where we're going?" Maura asked grabbing her purse with her free hand.

Jane grinned. "Nope." She looked down at Maura's heels. "Do you have socks? If not, I have a brand new pair for you."

Maura shot her a look. "If I have socks do I still get your socks?" She asked slyly.

Jane laughed. The easiness of their friendship helped ease her nerves. "Well, they definitely won't fit me."

Maura laughed as Jane opened the door for her. "So, I get fudge clusters and a new pair of socks. I'm excited to see where this date goes." Jane grinned before walking to the other side of the car and getting in. She hoped Maura did like what she had planned.

They pulled up to Bowling Thunder not long after they left Maura's place. Before going inside Jane reached into the glove box to hand Maura the pair of socks she bought for her. Maura smiled and thanked her but her eyes remained focused on the bright red letters on the brick wall in front of them. She couldn't help the smile on her face. She'd never been to a bowling alley before much less on a date. She was intrigued.

Jane got out of the car quickly running a hand over her face and taking a fast deep breath. Her nerves were slightly satiated by Maura's soft smile. She knew taking the refined woman to a bowling alley as their first date could have been a hit or a miss. She was fairly certain that Maura had never been to one and for Jane that was just tragic. Bowling alleys were like a rite of passage through teenage years. And she was determined to give Maura everything she never had the chance or the inclination to have. It was a deal she made with herself early on in their friendship. So far she'd been pretty good at keeping with it too. They'd gone to their first baseball game together at Fenway a while back where she practically forced Maura to eat a ballpark hotdog. Then there was the long list of movies like the Goonies, The Sandlot, and various classic Disney movies that were a constant staple in her own childhood home. There were other things she'd checked off, but going to a bowling alley had yet to be checked. And she couldn't think of a better way to do it than as their date. But now that they were there she kind of wished she took Maura to a fancy restaurant instead. She opened Maura's door for her and offered her a hand to get out.

After paying for everything Jane and Maura walked to their lane and sat down. The silence between them was prominent. Jane didn't know what to say. Weren't they supposed to be talking or something? Maura could feel Jane's nerves radiating from her body and she could see the steady shaking of her hands as she tried and failed to tie the bowling shoes. She looked at her own shoes, wiggling her toes around a bit in the socks Jane gave her. Jane definitely knew how to pick out comfy socks. She looked around the area completely fascinated with the sounds of laughter and the vastly different age groups at the place. She turned back to Jane placing a soothing hand on her bicep. "I'm nervous too." She whispered into Jane's ear. The slight muscle clench in Jane's neck did not go unnoticed by Maura. She felt her lips twitch upwards.

"What are we supposed to talk about?" Jane whispered back finally tying her shoe.

Maura shrugged standing to her feet. "Help me pick out a bowling ball." Jane took her hand as she stood. She could do that.

…

After bowling a couple frames the pair found themselves back in street shoes and on to the arcade. Jane took several one dollar bills from her wallet and stuck them in her pocket. She grabbed Maura's hand. "Come on, if you thought bowling was fun wait until you see what we're going to do next." She said excitedly. Maura couldn't help but let Jane's excitement rub off on her. They stopped walking at what looked like some sort of table. Jane stuck a dollar into the machine and it whirred to life. "Air hockey." Jane explained leading her to one side of the table and giving her what she presumed equivalent to a hockey stick. "Best game ever." Jane whispered into her ear purposefully getting a little too close to the doctor. Jane could literally feel the shiver that swept through Maura's body. She smirked. After walking back to her side of the table Jane laid the puck down. "Don't let the puck go through your goal, try to get it in mine. Got it?"

Maura nodded once. "Got it."

As soon as the game started all of Jane's worries left her. She scored twice before she got completely lost in looking at Maura. The woman across from her was laughing. It was one of those real laughs that came from deep in the belly accompanied by one of those smiles Jane loved that encapsulated her entire face. She just seemed so happy. Then there was the actual image before her of prim and proper Dr. Maura Isles with an air hockey stick in her hand, bent halfway over the table and her tongue sticking out between her lips determinedly that caught her so off guard and hit her in the base of her spine and spread like a wildfire to the rest of her organs. "Oh!" Maura yelled with hands raised in the air in triumph. "What's the matter detective, something a little distracting for you?"

It was only then that Jane noticed the air hockey table turned off and the score line read seven to two. Maura beat her. Jane arched an eyebrow. "Pool?"

Maura smirked back. "Lead the way."

Jane chalked up the pool cue in her hand before handing it over to Maura. "I've taught you how to play this already."

Maura nodded. "You have."

"So I'm not going to go easy on you this time." Jane smirked.

Maura laughed taking a step closer to Jane and most definitely invading into her personal space. She ran a hand lightly up Jane's arm before resting it on her shoulder. She just wanted to kiss her. She wanted to drop the whole act and plant one on Jane's lips. She didn't care where they went or what they did as long as she got a kiss at some point during the evening. Bowling was nice, especially watching Jane's hips twist as she threw the ball, and it was fun watching Jane watch her while they played air hockey. But now the night was getting longer and she could feel her patience wearing thin. She leaned in close to Jane's ear once more, like she'd been doing all night. She dropped the register of her voice just a bit so it was darker and richer. "That's what all that was? You letting me win?" She laughed airily before pulling away. Jane took several calming breaths. "Do you want to break or can I do it?"

"Y- you can." Jane said, her voice cracking just slightly. She narrowed her eyes at Maura as she bent over the pool table to hit the ball. She swore Maura winked at her just before she took the shot. Then it finally hit her that Maura was playing her and she was letting it happen. That would not do. Little did Maura know when she was in the Drug Unit Jane was very good at getting grown men to tell their secrets over a pool table.

Jane leaned against her pool cue as she surveyed what Maura had done. She didn't actually hit any balls into the pockets so the game was pretty much her choice with which she wanted to go with. Finally, she eyed the striped ball she wanted. She bent down slowly rolling her hips to one side to get into a good position. She could feel Maura's eyes roaming over her form. She smirked sticking her tongue between her lips as she took the shot. The ball went into the pocket just as planned. After her second shot and getting a scratch she turned to Maura leaning into her personal space just as she had done to her moments earlier. "Your turn." She could visibly see the shiver that ran up Maura's back, she saw the slight muscle twitch of her face and then heard Maura clear her throat before stepping away from her and back to the game.

Because of their little dance playing pool lasted much longer than it should have. By the end of the game Jane knew she couldn't take another round. She turned to Maura who looked just as shaken. Jane swallowed hard. "I hope you're hungry, I have something else planned, if you're ready."

Maura looked Jane up and down. _There is only one thing I want to eat right now…_Her thought process was cut short by Jane putting her stupid blazer back on. Her stomach growled. She didn't know how much longer she could take before she combusted, hopefully long enough to make it through dinner. She stepped forwards linking arms with Jane.

…

A few minutes later they walked into Jane's apartment. Maura walked in behind her. She noticed the apartment was clean and smelled fresh. Jo Friday yipped excitedly before circling around her feet. Maura bent down to scratch behind the little dog's ear just the way she liked it. She could hear Jane in the kitchen moving things around. She was about to sit down and take her heels off when she heard Jane's voice coming from the kitchen.

"Don't get too comfortable!" Jane said in a muffled voice. She was trying to get everything neat and orderly in the basket on the counter but her hands were shaking. Bowling had been easy, pool was slightly more difficult but this, _dinner _as a _date _was going to be the hardest of all. It was just going to be her and Maura and nothing in between them, nothing getting in the way. Things would be laid out bare. The thought alone sent her heart rate skyrocketing but she couldn't make her brain turn off. The more she thought about it the more pressure she put on herself the harder her hands shook. She was pretty sure her entire body was shaking. She'd never been this nervous before about a date. In fact, the last time she even remembered being this nervous was during her oral boards to get into the Boston Police Department. Finally, everything was settled in the basket. She took a long deep breath. _This is just Maura, _she thought. _It's just Maura, your best friend, the person that has seen you wild and in control and dressed up and bleeding and in a hospital bed. She already likes you. There is no need to be impressive. You can do this._ Jane nodded her head once more before walking out into her living room, basket in hand.

Maura wasn't feeling quite as nervous but the anticipation was killing her. The hard part, in her eyes at least, had already happened. They already picked their path and now it was just a matter of continuing on that path. That was easy. So she pet Jo Friday and walked down the hall to the restroom. She stopped midway down the hall to stare at a picture. It was of her and Jane after running their first marathon together. They were wiped of all energy and leaning into one another for support. She laughed quietly remembering the fight Jane put up with to not wear the outfit she had chosen for them. They'd done a lot that day. They solved a double murder, put a rapist behind bars and ran a marathon. But even then there was no one else she would have rather done all those things with. She was so lucky to have someone that she could just ask if she'd run a marathon with her and they would. Jane was her solid ground.

Jane walked into the living room holding the basket in one hand and a bottle of wine under her arm just as Maura was walking back into the living room. They smiled at each other. "Follow me." Jane said with a twist of her head towards the door.

Maura had no idea where Jane was going when she started going _up _the stairs and not down. But then finally they stopped by a door briefly before Jane pushed it open. They were on the roof of Jane's building. Maura saw a blanket already laid out on the ground. "Are we allowed to be up here?" She asked with a slight hint of awe in her voice.

Jane chuckled. "Does it ruin the ambiance if I say yes?"

Maura smiled affectionately. "No." She took the wine bottle from underneath Jane's arm. She looked at the label. "My favorite." She commented walking backwards towards the pallet.

Jane shrugged. "I know." She followed Maura gently placing the basket between them before sitting down herself. She started unloading the basket. There were two Tupperware containers of food, one hot, one cold. Jane handed Maura the corkscrew so she could open the wine and fill their glasses.

Maura couldn't help but let the heavenly smell of the food from the hot container to waft in her direction. Her stomach growled with sudden hunger. "Did your mother cook?" Maura couldn't help but ask.

Jane shot her a withering look with an eyebrow expertly raised. "No. Believe it or not," Jane stated handing over a plate with a serving of lasagna on it and a fork towards Maura who took it graciously. "I know my way around a kitchen." She finished picking up her own plate.

Maura looked at her plate of steaming food in her hand. "You made this?" Maura asked before sticking a small piece with her fork. She pursed her lips blowing on it to cool it down before taking a bite. "Oh my god." She licked her lips giving the dark haired woman across from her a look. "You've been holding out on me, Jane."

Jane laughed with a shrug. "I am Angela Rizzoli's daughter." She took a bite off her own plate before shooting Maura a smirk. "Wait until you try desert."

Maura raised an eyebrow. "You are just full of surprises aren't you?"

"You have no idea." Their conversation flowed from topic to topic like it usually did. They talked about something funny Frost had said. They shared a laugh over something Jo Friday had done at the park the last time Jane took her. As shocking as it was for the both of them, it was easy. Just talking without pressure like nothing had ever changed. When their plates were clear Jane put them back into the basket.

"So what's for desert?" Maura asked.

Jane chuckled. "Eager are we?"

"Well," Maura shrugged. "What is it they say? Talk is cheap and you usually walk the walk?"

"Close enough." Jane paused suddenly getting an idea in her head. "Close your eyes." Maura did as she was told. Jane picked up a new fork putting a piece of the chocolate pie onto it before moving towards Maura. "Open your mouth."

Maura quirked an eyebrow. "This isn't going to end up in my face is it?"

"No, I promise." Jane laughed. "Scouts honor."

"But you were a Sprout Trooper."

"Maura." The second the chocolate and whipped cream hit her mouth her eyes shot open before rolling into the back of her head. "Is it good?" Jane asked nervously feeling very hot all of a sudden at the slight moan that escaped Maura as she swallowed it down. Maura opened her eyes and smacked Jane on the arm. "Hey!" Jane yelled rubbing her arm with a pout.

"You make me cook all the time for us, and you can do _that_ in a kitchen?" She narrowed her eyes playfully pointing a finger at the basket.

"You offer!" Jane shrugged. "And I don't like cooking so my dishes are pretty standard."

Maura took the fork and container from Jane. "Homemade lasagna," She dipped the fork in the container. "Which by the way, is just as good as your mother's."

"It's my favorite. I had to learn to cook it." Jane shrugged.

"Still, it is not a dish standard for most people." Maura smiled holding out the fork towards Jane. "Open up."

"Is this going to end up on my face?"

Maura's jaw dropped in fake offense. "I'm offended you would think such a low -" But then Jane's tongue darted over the fork followed by the rest of her mouth.

She pulled away from the fork Maura was holding and licked her lips. "You're right, that _was _good." Jane mumbled.

Maura put the items in her hand on the ground. She got up onto her knees, and put one hand on the ground to stabilize her before leaning into Jane. "You've got something…" She trailed off swiping the index finger of her right hand on the tip of Jane's nose.

Jane watched as Maura put her finger in her mouth to lick off the whipped cream. She swallowed thickly. "You said it wouldn't end up on my face." She hated how hoarse her voice sounded, how rough it was just then. She wanted to be gentler, to say something more profound, more confident. But with Maura still so close to her her brain was in some sort of thick fog. All she wanted to do was lean forward and capture Maura's lips with her own. It would've been easy.

"It's not my fault that you're a messy eater." Maura countered back. It was amazing, Maura thought, that the sexual tension was not made up, that it was still there in spades. That it was still there even after she knew she could have Jane. That had always been a struggle for her. She always wanted all the things that were just out of reach and then when she finally got them the newness of it all would quickly fade only to make her bored with the whole situation. She couldn't count the number of relationships that had ended because of that. But god, she wanted Jane so much it was quickly becoming ridiculous. She was wired, a bundle of nerves under her skin threatening to explode at the slightest touch. She couldn't break eye contact with those dark, almost black eyes in front of her. She could feel Jane's breath on her face, shallow and rapid. One of them was going to have to make a move. They both seemed to be thinking the same thing as they both tried to initiate the long awaited kiss.

It was all wrong. Jane knew it and Maura knew it. It was just a mess. Their heads were angled the same direction, noses were squished uncomfortably, teeth knocked against teeth, and their chins jutted against one another. Added to the unfortunate mess their lips hardly even touched. It was a terrible kiss, a non-kiss. Jane and Maura both immediately separated. Maura sat back on her heels with a slight huff. How could two people with so much chemistry together be so bad at kissing each other? She was stuck on that thought as Jane's mind went elsewhere.

In movies the kiss was always right. It could've been an action movie or a romantic comedy but the kiss, the big moment, was always right. Jane felt disappointed in herself, in Maura, in life. For a very short second, she thought about walking away, about just chalking it all up to awkwardness. But it was a short second. She promised herself to see it through, and she'd done a good job of it so far. Her lips tingled and her body felt like a very, very live mine. No one in recent memory ever made her feel like that. She could still remember the feel of Maura's gentle curves molding into her own thin frame like she belonged there while she taught the honey-blond to bowl. She remembered the first time they held hands that night and the jolt of…of _something _that seeped into her veins from the simple touch and catapulted her heart rate. The questions that had littered her mind for the past few days finally quieted down and became virtually non-existent. The 'what if…' scenarios were no longer there. Somehow throughout the night the knowledge that they had already been through so much held her in place. If they could get through the horrors of Hoyt and Doyle and car accidents and stupid nuns and so, so many other things, then they could pass this bridge too, together, like they always had and always would.

"Maybe you're suffering from performance anxiety?" Maura offered helpfully.

Jane's jaw dropped. "Excuse me?"

"Or maybe I should do it?" Maura shrugged keeping her eyes on Jane's lips. There were so many things she wanted in this moment. It had been weeks since she realized she wanted…wanted Jane in a romantic way. And now that thing she'd been pushing away for all those weeks refused to be pushed away anymore. Jane shot her another look which she missed because of where her eyes were directed. "It's just you're used to being kissed by," She licked her lips mid-sentence. "By dominant men. I hypothesize if you were being kis –"

Jane cut Maura off by doing what she was good at: taking charge. She gently braced Maura's chin with her hand before kissing her. She heard Maura make a muffled _oh_ sound before she started kissing back.

It was a simple kiss. Just two people, two sets of mouths just moving against one another. There was nothing incredibly fancy about it but everything seemed to disappear around them. The slight discomfort of thin pants on the roof, the honking cars filled with impatient people, the slightly muggy Boston air – it was all just gone. It was just the two of them on a roof kissing. No politics, no job, no family. Whatever questions that were left for both of them faded into white noise in their heads. Jane felt Maura's hands come to rest on her hips. The steady current that was between them all night seemed to solidify in its intensity.

Jane pulled away a few moments later. The need to breathe only barely outweighed the feelings surging through her body. She already wanted to do it again. How could anyone walk away from someone who kissed like that? She closed her eyes resting her forehead against Maura's. "Why did we wait so long to do that again?"

Jane felt the breath of Maura's laughter on her face and couldn't fight her own smile from creeping up. She felt so much lighter after that kiss. "We didn't want to ruin what we already had." Maura said breaking the silence after a moment."

Jane nodded, brushing her nose lightly over Maura's. "Oh, yeah." Her voice refused to raise higher than a whisper. "Think it's safe to say that didn't ruin anything?"

Maura leaned into Jane's touch with a soft barely audible sigh. "Mmm. The world did not implode."

"God didn't strike us down." Jane brought her hand to one of Maura's. She took it from her waist and played with her fingers.

"The moon is still hanging in the sky."

"You're still here." Jane's voice was barely a whisper that time, Maura had to strain to hear her.

Maura leaned her face in closer. "So are you."

The pair let those facts sink in for a moment. They were just there on the roof lost in the feeling of the other so close. "I should take you home." Jane said quietly. Maura nodded slowly in agreement but neither made an effort to move. Finally, Jane broke the silence. "I'm getting a cramp."

Maura reluctantly moved away from Jane laughing heartily. "That's because you don't drink enough water." She stood to her feet slowly offering Jane a hand.

"Way to kill the mood there Dr. Isles." Jane replied a smile on her face. She took Maura's hand and stood.

"I believe you're the one with the cramp, detective."

"Whatever." Jane groaned bending down to grab the basket. Maura grabbed the blanket in her right hand before grabbing Jane's hand again. Jane smiled placing a soft unexpected kiss to Maura's lips. She squeezed her hand and led them to the door, both women were smiling as they walked down the stairs.

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**A/N: **I had this really long explanation typed out but basically I just wanted to explain that I chose to write this story this way because I wanted it to feel realistic. I wanted to explore that slow build. That 'oh my god I'm attracted to my best friend what the hell' feeling that happens when that happens. Maybe someone points is out to you, maybe you figure it out on your own but one day you wake up and nothing's changed but all of a sudden you're like 'oh, you look really good in blue, when did that happen?' and it's this big thing and it's scary. And that's why you had to wait 14 chapters and a whole bunch of words for a kiss.

I'm not done writing. I just wanted to thank you all for your patience and the unbelievably kind reviews.

Thanks for reading!

P.S. Song I was listening to while writing this: Just a Kiss by Lady Antebellum


	15. The Talk

**Disclaimer: **Don't own the characters. Not making money. ETC.

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Saturday evening after their weekly run Jane and Maura were sitting on Jane's couch with far too much space between them. Jane held the remote loosely in her left hand but the television remained turned off. The silence would have been deafening if they weren't both lost in their own thoughts.

Maura was stuck on the image of Jane only a few moments earlier. The dark haired woman had come down the hallway running a hand through her damp hair a smile playing on her lips. The sweats she wore were slung low on her hips, even then sitting on the couch she could still see a thin patch of tan skin and the top of her boy shorts. The white ribbed tank she wore was also not helping her mind focus. But those weren't the things that really struck her, it was Jane's face, the way she smiled, the way she was so confident in those clothes, the way she could be so at ease. The tension was nearly gone from her shoulders. Maura couldn't help but wonder if it was from their new relationship or if it was just a coincidence. She was struck by this image of Jane, this woman who had inexplicably picked her when no one else ever dared, this woman who was everything, anything she needed to be in the moment she needed to be it. She could fall in love with this woman. Her chest seized for a moment. She could fall in love with Jane. And it would be easy.

Jane meanwhile was stuck on a different notion. She was dating her best friend, who was a woman, and they had kissed, more than once. She felt…Well, she wasn't really sure what she felt but she thought she ought to be having some sort of freak out or something. Normal, well-adjusted adults didn't just decide one day to kiss their best friend and switch teams just for the hell of it. Then there was the small fact that she was Catholic, that her whole family was Catholic. What if they disowned her? Or if Frankie or Tommy didn't want to associate with her or Maura anymore? It happened, she knew it happened. She had friends in high school, at work even, where their families disowned them for numerous reasons. It could've been a romantic partner they just didn't like, because they were gay, or because they were a cop, or some other lame excuse. Could she even cope if her mother decided that it was unacceptable? That was what she was worried about. It wasn't about her standing with God. If she was worried about her standing with the man upstairs she would've picked a different career choice.

She'd long ago given up on asking herself how all of this had happened. One day she and Maura were just best friends, hanging out, watching a movie and then suddenly they weren't, suddenly it got complicated. Suddenly she found herself dating her best friend. She squinted at the ceiling. Life was funny that way, always throwing curve balls and then switching it up just as she learned to knock those out of the park. After nearly twenty-four hours of trying to find the answer she officially gave up trying to understand herself and the feelings she had for Maura. She just knew she liked being around Maura and she really liked kissing her. That, she decided, was good enough for the moment.

She let go of a long sigh. Maura didn't even flinch. _She must be thinking too much too, _Jane thought while eyeing Maura out of the corner of her eye. Jane bit her lip trying to figure out how to say what she wanted to without shoving her foot in her mouth. "I'm scared." She felt Maura glance over before looking back straight ahead. "I mean, this…this is important and I don't want to screw it up."

"Me too." Maura replied back tenderly.

Jane nodded her head. "You know, normally, I would be talking to my best friend about all of these," She swallowed hard. "These things I'm feeling about this person I'm dating." She bit her lip before continuing. "But then I remember that the person I'm dating _is _my best friend. And it's…it's a complicated thing."

"I'm always your best friend, Jane. Before and above anything else, I'm your best friend." Maura paused. "But I…I do understand what you're saying."

"You do?"

"Yes."

Jane shifted lower on the couch. "I don't want it to be awkward, Maura."

Maura blinked at the ceiling. "Neither do I."

There was a slight pause. "Then how do we make it not awkward?"

Maura shrugged. "Take it slow?"

"You know it's funny." Jane laughed. "I feel like we are moving at a pretty slow pace, but like everything is moving fast around us." She shrugged. "I don't know."

There was another pause. "Can I ask you a question, Jane?"

"Shoot."

"Why were you asleep on my doorstep that morning?" The question came out quietly and suddenly Jane was very glad they were sitting on the same couch facing the same direction and not looking at each other.

"Do you remember what you said to me after your little drinking binge?"

"No." Jane could practically hear the blush and almost shame in Maura's voice.

"Don't feel bad about it, you have a right to get drunk every now and then, Maura." Jane felt Maura nod through the couch cushion. "Well," She continued. "After I got you back here I made you eat something and drink some water. You said you needed to talk to me. At first you weren't making very much sense. You were talking about math and composite and prime numbers." She shrugged. "I honestly had no idea what you were talking about."

"Prime numbers are only divisible by the number one and itself. For instance, the number two, only one and two can be divisible into that number." Maura interjected. "A composite number would be like four. Four is divisible by more than just one and four because it can be divisible by two as well."

"Okay, yeah well Dr. Smartypants you weren't making much sense but then you said we needed to breakup."

"What?"

"Yeah, you said…well, you told me you liked me too much. We weren't dating but it felt like we were to you, like you were cheating on me or something." Jane paused a moment before continuing. "So the next morning I went for a run to clear my head and when I came back, you were gone." She shrugged. "Something just didn't feel right so I went to your house."

"I'm sorry, you had to see that. It was unacceptable for me to behave in such a manner."

"Maura."

"Jane." Maura mimicked.

"You're human. You're definitely not underage. You can get drunk if you want to. It's not against the law."

"It's improper."

"So?" Maura had no come back for that comment but Jane had something she'd wanted to ask. "I don't mind, Maura, I really don't. But why did you drink so much that night? It's not like you. Usually people only drink like that because they want to drown something."

Maura didn't say anything for a minute. Jane thought she was trying to figure a way out of the question. When she did speak her voice was barely louder than a whisper. "We almost died. And you weren't there."

Jane's breath caught in her throat. "Jesus, Maura."

"It wasn't your fault."

"You just said I wasn't there for you, how is that _not _my fault?"

"I never asked you to be."

Jane rolled her eyes. "You shouldn't have to ask. You're my best friend I should've –"

"You can't read minds, Jane." Maura reasoned. "And I didn't want you around so if you were I would've inevitably pushed you away."

"Why?"

"My growing attraction for you. I – I didn't know how to handle it." Maura confessed.

"That's why I wasn't there."

"What?" Maura asked confusedly.

"I was having the same problem. I was at the Robber one night moping at the bar. Korsak came in and flat out told me I had a crush on you." She sighed. "I didn't know how to deal with it either."

The silence that followed was more bearable than the one from earlier. It was a comfortable silence made for quiet thinking. Without thinking about it both women moved their hands to the middle of the cushion separating them reaching for the other. Jane smiled as they joined. "I've never dated a cop before." Maura said laughter clearly evident in her voice.

It was just like them to switch from serious to playful joking in a matter of moments. Jane found comfort in the familiar. She couldn't help but snort before tossing it back to Maura. This had always been their game. "That's because most of your dates fall on the other side of the law." The comment earned Jane a smack in the arm by Maura's free hand. Jane grabbed the hand that smacked her. The move was difficult to maneuver but by the time Jane was done with her she had Maura pinned beneath her on the couch. She grinned mischievously. "I've never dated a doctor before."

"Well, if it makes you feel better, I do have a badge." Maura countered smiling innocently up at the dark haired woman above her.

"Oh, that's it!" Jane started let go of one of Maura's hands so she could tickle the doctor's stomach. Maura couldn't help the explosion of laughter that escaped her. She rued the day Jane found out she was ticklish. "Say uncle Maura." Jane laughed.

"Never!" She laughed playfully before pulling one of Jane's own moves on the detective. It didn't work out quite as intended. They both fell to the floor in a fit of laughter. Jo Friday barked and jumped around them wanting to get in on some of the fun. They were a tangled mess of limbs and hair breathing heavy with smiles on their faces.

"You are sneaky." Jane laughed narrowing her eyes jokingly at Maura.

"I learned from the best." Maura countered. Neither attempted to move. Jane turned her head sideways and was caught by surprise by Maura. She was always being caught by surprise by the doctor lately it seemed. She was a remarkable woman. She was brave and daring in all the ways Jane wasn't. But, god, Jane though, she was beautiful. Her skin was flushed and she just looked so _happy._

The feeling in the room changed. Jane could feel it the second it happened. All she wanted to do was lean slightly forward and kiss Maura. "Flattery will get you everywhere, Dr. Isles."

"In that case," Maura licked her lips as Jane inched closer. She too could sense the change in atmosphere. "I think you are gorgeous, intelligent, car –" Her word was cut off my Jane's lips meeting hers. The kiss started slow but quickly escalated into something much more. Each of them was fighting for some form of dominance. Jane rolled over on top of Maura to gain more leverage. She had one knee resting on one side of Maura's leg and she was using both of her hands to keep her weight off of the woman below her. Maura didn't have to deal with any of that. She let her hands roam over Jane's back slowly before coming back down and resting on the other woman's hips, rubbing lightly at the exposed skin she found there. The ever so slight moan that escaped Jane's lips from the move was not lost on her. The kiss was all tongue and open mouths and ragged breathing. It was very different than what they had experience thus far in their admittedly short relationship. Jane didn't know how long they stayed like that but it was long enough for her left arm to start shaking uncontrollably. She pulled away falling to Maura's side breathing heavily. Her heart was hammering in her chest. She felt alive. She couldn't remember the last time just kissing someone brought out such a strong emotion of liveliness. She felt like a teenager.

"Wow." Maura whispered into the room also completely out of breath.

Jane laughed. All of her doubt suddenly leaving her. "Yeah?"

"Definitely." Maura answered back. There was a moment of silence between them before Maura spoke again. "I should go home." She said all the while hoping Jane would ask her to stay.

"You could just stay, you know?" Jane shrugged as if she didn't care what Maura chose to do even though she was hoping she would stay. "I have some clothes you could sleep in."

Maura turned her head towards Jane. Her lips were redder than usual and slightly swollen. Her eyes were dilated and she was still breathing heavy. She had caused that. They could debate about feelings and the like, have thorough discussions about it all but this – the science – was what she put her belief in. Those were all signs that Jane was attracted to her and she was sure they were being mimicked by her own body. "Then I think I'll stay." She said a slow smile forming across her face.

* * *

**A/N: **Cheesy chapter was cheesy. I know in the show they don't really talk much but they kind of did in season one and as the author I felt I needed to have this chapter here before I jumped into my other plans.

Thanks for reading!


	16. Only a Week

**A/N: **Officially the longest story I've ever written ever and I just want to virtually hand shake/fist bump you all (because I don't do hugs) for being so supportive and awesome! Yay!

**Disclaimer: **Don't own characters and whatever I normally say here.

* * *

Jane scrubbed her face in the dirty bathroom sink with what little hand soap was left in the crookedly hanging dispenser. She was in some grungy gas station bathroom in the middle of South Boston. She was fuming. If she were an old cartoon character smoke would be pouring out of her ears and her face would be bright red. She was so angry she wanted to throw her fist straight through the dirty mirror in front of her. Or, better yet, she wanted to throw the suspect for their double murder who was oh so conveniently in the back of the unmarked parked outside through the mirror. She let out a growl. It was Friday night and she was supposed to go out with Maura, to a place of her choosing. It was supposed to be their second date, but instead Maura was probably home getting all dolled up and she was still on the clock an hour away and covered in beer. She grit her teeth as the water washed over her face.

The double murder victims had been two people in their mid-twenties, a man and a woman. They were killed in bed together. At first the team thought it might've been a robbery gone bad, but after talking to the girl's sister they found out about a boyfriend with an anger problem. It was only a matter of time before all the pieces finally came together. The only problem was that they couldn't find the slimy bastard. He skipped all over town. Every time they got a hint of where he would be he'd be gone before they got there. He kept going from one bad end of town to the other, hiding in dark alleys and sleazy motels. It was only two hours ago that they finally caught up to him, thanks to one of Frost's CI's.

He was in South Boston, at a redneck biker bar. Jane and Frost were the lucky detectives charged with bringing him in. Of course, when they got to the bar there was a bouncer. And of course he was a big hulking man with gigantic biceps. Then there were the actual bikers and so forth _in _the bar. Jane scoffed, the city of Boston was definitely going to get one fat bill from the bar owner to say the least.

Their suspect was in the middle of hustling a game of pool when the two of them finally got passed the bouncer. The second he saw the two detectives walking his way he started running. In the chaos, tables were flipped over, food fell to the floor, drinks were spilled, and glass shattered. Jane never knew what it was about bar fights, but it seemed that when one fight broke out the whole place wanted to get involved.

Somehow Frost got thrown into a dart board, and their suspect was thrown over the bar where the bartender promptly threw him back like a fish he didn't want to keep. The second he fell to the floor he scrambled to his feet almost instantly. But Jane was right behind him and had him cornered. It was then he threw a pitcher of beer at her. Like the whole pitcher. Hence, why she was covered in beer. She jumped back but it fell to her feet splashing beer on her pants and sending shattered glass all across the floor. Before he could run again Frost tackled him flat on the ground. Even with their combined efforts they were having considerable difficulty getting the man in cuffs. He was a squirrely son of a bitch. Punches and elbows were thrown and somehow the man wound up on his back. He decided to spit at the closest person to him, which just so happened to be Jane. She shuddered remembering that little fact. People were absolutely disgusting sometimes.

It was the straw that broke the camel's back. She pulled her gun from her holster and aimed it directly at his head. "On your stomach." She growled making her way to her feet. The noise in the bar immediately quieted, everyone froze. He did as he was told. Frost cuffed him and yanked him to his feet. Once the gun was drawn the guy started to backtrack. He kept saying over and over how he didn't know they were cops. It was a stupid story, one the two detectives heard a thousand times over and one they weren't very interested in hearing again.

Jane brushed her sleeve over her face after holstering her weapon in a failed attempt to wipe away the remnants of the spit from her face. She gave the bar a once over. People were already cleaning up, righting tables, and sweeping and mopping up the floor. The bouncer was throwing a man out the door and the bartender went back to serving drinks. No one seemed entirely too shocked. It was like that kind of thing happened all the time, in hindsight, it probably did. She looked down at her suit as the three of them walked out of the bar. Her boots and socks, she thought with a grimace, were wet. Her button up was hopelessly wrinkled, littered with wet spots and partially untucked. Her slacks and blazer met the same fate. She frowned. She felt gross and dirty, like she'd never get clean again. Frost, she noticed, wasn't much better off.

They had an hour drive counting in the rush hour traffic until they got back home. It was after Jane's fifth use of the small hand sanitizer bottle she kept in the glove box that Frost pulled into the next gas station. She gave him a pointed look which he returned. "Wash your hands, you're going to get a rash or something if you keep using that." He said pointing to the bottle in her hands. And that was how she found herself asking the gas station attendant for the key to the bathroom and face first in a dirty sink. She was pretty sure she'd seen crime scenes cleaner than that bathroom.

As she dried her face her phone vibrated on her hip. "Rizzoli." She answered automatically not bothering with looking at the name on the screen.

"Are we still on for tonight?" Maura asked on the other line. She was just putting the finishing touches on her makeup and hair.

Jane sighed pouting slightly as she stared at the pinky on her left handing wondering why it was throbbing. She thought they would get further into their relationship before her job started cutting into things, but she had no such luck. "I think my pinky's messed up." She said absently purposefully ignoring Maura's question.

Maura couldn't fight the disappointment that flooded her system. "I can take a look at it for you if you like."

"Don't sound like that."

"Like what?"

"Like – like," Jane had no idea how to word what she was going to say, her mind and body suddenly exhausted of all energy as the adrenaline steadily wore off. "Like you're a puppy and I just kicked you."

"All I said was I would look at your hand for you. I didn't insinuate anything."

"It was the tone in which it was said." Jane groaned. "Ughh. I've officially turned into my mother." She walked out of the bathroom, not feeling much cleaner, and handed the key back to the gas station attendant. "I don't know. I'm just really tired, Maura."

"Of course." Maura replied. She turned off the curling iron. She looked at her reflection in the mirror. She always tried to be honest with herself and tried to think on the positive side. She knew when they caught the break and Jane left with Frost that they wouldn't make it to her dinner reservations. But part of her held out hope that Jane would at least try, which was why she decided to go ahead and get ready. Only it was all for nothing and Jane didn't even sound like she wanted to have dinner in.

Jane huffed in frustration at Maura's tone again. Even though she was on the phone with her, she could still hear the coldness behind the tenor of her voice. It always frustrated her the way Maura could just flip a switch and go from warm and open to cold and closed. "Maura that's not…"

"If you want me to look at your hand I will, if not," She pursed her lips at the mirror. "Then I'll see you on Monday." She hung up the phone before Jane could answer her back. Dejectedly, she made her way downstairs to the kitchen. A generous serving from the bottle of her favorite wine would surely help ease some of the tension in her head.

Jane looked at the phone screen at the sudden silence. "Shit." Maura had actually hung up on her. Like actually hung up on her. And _she_ felt like the jackass. How did that even work? She wrinkled her nose at the smell coming from her own body. The alcohol was giving her a headache. She wondered briefly if this was the beginning of the end. With a frustrated grumble she stuck her phone back into its place on her belt before slumping into the passenger seat of the unmarked.

"Feel better?" Frost asked trying to lighten the mood. The death glare he got in return made him abruptly turn back to the windshield.

"Let's just go home." He nodded his head at his partner's words and backed out of the parking lot.

…

All eyes were on them as they walked into the precinct. The three of them were more than a little worse for wear. Frost's normally playful disposition was tucked away, replaced by a serious expression. Jane had that dark look in her eye that sent anyone who might've wanted to talk to her very, very far away. Jane tried to convince herself that that was the reason people were parting like the red sea when they walked by. It definitely had nothing to do with the horrible combination of sweat and alcohol that followed their steps and hung in the air when they walked by.

When the trio finally got off the elevator at homicide Korsak didn't even attempt to hide his laughter. Jane and Frost exchanged knowing glancing before shoving their suspect in the empty seat next the sergeant's desk. Korsak stopped laughing immediately. "You deal with him." Jane grunted walking to her desk. She grabbed her wallet and keys from the locked drawer. "I'm out."

Frost nodded in agreement. "Me too." He loosened his tie and followed Jane to the elevator.

The sergeant was left sputtering in their wake. "You got a pisser around here?" The suspect asked cutting into his thoughts. Korsak groaned pulling the man to his feet. It was definitely going to be a long, long night.

…

Jane stood in front of her mirror in her apartment. She looked like shit, and felt it too. Everything seemed to be hurting in one way or another. Her head was pounding in a way that it hadn't in a long time. Her hair was knotted in the ponytail and stringy in places where it had fallen out. The eyeliner under her right eye was smudged and there was a small barely visible scratch on her left cheek. She let out a long deep breath before taking off her clothes and stepping into the shower.

The water was turned as hot as she could stand. She was exhausted, and the guilty feeling in the back of her head was something she couldn't shake no matter how hard she tried. Not that she was trying all that hard. It wasn't like Maura was asking much from her. It was a Friday. Friday's were usually reserved for date nights for normal people. She'd agreed on Monday to go out wherever Maura wanted to. For all intents and purposes, she stood Maura up. And that was just ridiculous.

She continued letting the steaming hot water run over her skin, washing the events of the day literally down the drain. She scrubbed through her thick hair wincing slightly at the pain shooting in her hand. She let the lavender body wash eliminate every trace of alcohol on her skin. It was only when the water started running cold that she turned the faucet off and stepped out of the shower. Jane got dressed slowly. Her bed was calling her name but she knew she wouldn't be able to sleep. She packed an overnight bag, fed Watson, and leashed Jo Friday before grabbing her keys and wallet and leaving her apartment. She would give Maura a second date even if she fell asleep halfway through it.

…

Maura was on her second glass of wine and uncharacteristically flipping through channels on her television. She didn't know exactly what she was feeling. Jane's job was Jane's job. She never wanted to change that but she was looking forward to this night all week. She knew on a logical level that if it was she that was stuck at work and having to cancel on Jane, Jane would understand. So why did she feel so disappointed? She swirled the wine in her glass in a circle. She thought for a moment. It was probably because their relationship was new and she wanted to drown in it. Like a song she played on repeat until she got sick of it, only she didn't think she'd ever get tired of Jane. She also hadn't seen or talked to Jane much all week because of their respective jobs. She tried to convince herself that it was only week one and she shouldn't be missing Jane as much as she was, but she was failing miserably at it. Her doorbell rang and her heart leapt into her throat. Maybe Jane was going to spend the evening with her.

…

Jane walked into the twenty-four hour Thai restaurant. It wasn't five star French food but it would do in a pinch. They'd eaten there enough times through enough late nights that she knew exactly what Maura ordered. She picked up some chocolate for Maura at a different store as well hoping to soften her up before she apologized. When she got into the car for the final time Jo Friday looked at her, tail wagging furiously behind her, from the passenger seat. Jane laughed running a tired hand over her face. "It's only been a week Jo." She scratched the scruffy dog's head before turning on the car. "Well, I guess, technically it's been two weeks, but I already feel different." Jo barked when Jane's hand left her head. "Pretty lame, huh?" The dog just cocked her head to the side and ran to the passenger side window. Jane shook her head and backed out of the parking spot. _Here goes nothing, _she thought as she drove towards Beacon Hill.

…

Maura answered the door smiling and barefoot. "Tommy?" She asked in surprise. He was most definitely not the Rizzoli she was hoping was on the other side of the door. She smiled sweetly nonetheless. "What are you doing here? Come in." She stood away from the door giving him some space.

He scratched the back of his head. "Ah, naw." He shook his head. "I don't wanna impose or nothin'. I was just dropping this off for Ma but I think she's asleep already." He said gesturing to the glass dish in his hand.

"Oh," Maura said. "I can take it if you want. I'll give it to her in the morning."

He grinned. "That'd be great!" He handed the clean glass dish to her. There was a moment of awkward silence. He let his eyes travel up Maura's body taking in the form hugging black dress and flawless hair and makeup before looking back to her eyes. "Are you going somewhere? I don't want to keep you."

Maura shook her head. "My date cancelled." He nodded his head. Headlights flashed in the driveway before turning off. He gave Maura a raised eyebrow look as the headlights turned off. Maura shrugged trying not to let him in on her rapidly beating heart. "It must be Jane."

"Oh." Tommy mumbled before looking back up at Maura. "Well, for what it's worth, your date's a jerk." He smiled charmingly. "I know if _I _was your date, I wouldn't ever leave you waiting."

Maura blushed. "That's sweet." But her eyes were on the lanky woman who was standing behind Tommy. Jo Friday yipped excitedly and threatened to escape Jane's tight grasp at seeing the two familiar people.

Tommy turned taking in his sister's clean appearance. "Your date suck too?" He shook his head stepping down the steps. "Man, you guys need better taste in men." He looked back at Maura. "Thanks!" He shouted before getting into his car and leaving.

Jane stood on the first step blinking at the space her brother occupied. She pointed from Maura to the now empty spot tilting her head sideways. "I wasn't expecting you to come tonight. I thought you were tired."

"Why was my brother here?"

Maura raised an eyebrow. "Excuse me?"

Dark eyes met hazel. "Why was my brother here?" Jane repeated in the same dark tone.

"Are you _really_ implying what I think your implying?" Maura shot back disbelievingly.

"It's just a simple question, Maura."

"We were just talking. He didn't even come inside, Jane. It's not like I called him over. He was dropping something off for your mother." She emphasized this by holding up the blue dish in her hand.

"Yeah, well he wants more than friendship." Jane mumbled looking away from Maura's face. Maura was silent, unable to deny the truth and not sure what to say that would satiate Jane. Jane sighed running a hand over her face. She was so fucking tired. "No, I get it. It's…" _It's cool, _was what she was going to say but it wasn't cool or great or acceptable. "Whatever. If you want my brother, you can have him. Everyone loves him, I wouldn't blame you, too much anyway." She rolled her eyes at her own words. The night was just getting better and better. "Just don't come running to me when he breaks your heart." Jane knew he would too. Breaking hearts and getting into trouble was all Tommy was good at. She pulled on Jo's leash and started making her way back down the steps. She didn't know why she felt so bad about it. It had only been a week after all. She'd had longer relationships that when ended didn't leave her feeling that badly.

Maura rolled her eyes. She set the dish in her hand on the porch chair next to the door. "You are impossible." She grabbed the lapels of Jane's jacket using the height differential of the porch steps to her advantage. She crushed her lips against Jane's in a bruising kiss. Her grip only tightened when Jane's tongue met hers. Jane finally let go of Jo's leash. The dog took her chance at freedom and ran into the open door of the house with the blue leash trailing behind her. Finally, when the need to breathe overcame her Maura pulled away just barely. "You think I would risk our friendship on the wrong Rizzoli?" She mumbled into the lips beneath hers. "I want you." Saying the phrase was not nearly as hard as she thought it was. In fact, it felt like some sort of weight lifted from her. "Just you." She repeated before kissing Jane again.

Jane sighed leaning into Maura's touch. She didn't know when it happened or why so suddenly but she could get lost in the feel of Maura's body pressed against her own. "I'm sorry." She kissed Maura's nose lightly. "I don't know what came over me."

"Jealousy." Maura offered helpfully, leaning into the detective's shoulder.

Jane chuckled wrapping her arms around Maura. The aches and pains from the day didn't feel near as achy holding Maura. "Fair enough. I'm also sorry for canceling on you." Maura shook her head, because really it was fine. "I'm just not having a good day today." Jane finished with an airy laugh.

"Oh! Your hand!" Maura exclaimed remembering what Jane had said on the phone.

"It's just jammed, Maura."

Regardless, the honey blonde doctor took a step away grabbing at Jane's hands to see which one it was. She didn't have to look for long before she saw the white medical tape holding Jane's pinky and ring finger together on her left hand. "Let's get you inside."

If it was anyone else saying those words to Jane in that worried almost condescending tone she would've been pissed off. But it was Maura. _Her_ Maura. They'd been in this position a hundred times over that it didn't bother her. It didn't bother her when Maura took the bag of take out from her right hand or when Maura shoved her into a chair at the kitchen table. It didn't bother her when Maura reached down with a gentle hand to stroke her cheek. It didn't bother her when Maura used that same gentleness to take the tape from her fingers off. It didn't even bother her when Maura gazed with a heavy scrutiny over every inch of her body. If it was anyone else Jane probably wouldn't have made an effort to be there in the first place. But if she had they would definitely be in a screaming match by now. She probably would've left when she saw someone else at their front door. But it wasn't anyone else. It was Maura. And Maura was always the exception to all of her rules. So she sat back and let Maura look at her. With every touch she felt her body almost involuntarily lean towards it. She let her eyes drift closed. Maura's words finally sunk into her brain. Maura wanted her. She'd said so herself. Her heart felt light. Whatever insecurities that were left were slowly getting knocked to smithereens bit by bit as their time together went on. She couldn't help the smile that slowly spread across her lips.

"So what happened?" Maura's voice cut through her thoughts. In all honesty, she was running out of any real, good reason to touch Jane. The detective wasn't even that beat up, or beat up at all. She just wanted to touch her.

Jane cracked an eye open. "Bar fights aren't nearly as fun as they sound."

"_Jane." _Maura admonished.

"It's not like I instigated it! He saw us and started running. I don't even know how it started or how I got the scratch on my face." She kept her eyes closed as she talked. "You're lucky you didn't see me earlier. I smelled like beer and sweat and shitty cologne. It was awful." She yawned. "But I brought Thai food and this weekend if we don't get called out, and if you still want to, you can take me out wherever you were going to take me out to tonight."

Maura smiled. "That's sweet, Jane."

Jane imagined Maura standing a few inches from her with that sickeningly sweet smile across her face, maybe a hand over her heart, so she said the only thing she could say. "_Gross." _

Chuckling slightly, Maura walked around the kitchen to get plates to eat on. Halfway through the meal, Jane felt her attention start dropping. She was hanging out in that weird limbo phase between semi-awake and conked out on the kitchen table face first in Thai food. She couldn't even remember what Maura was talking about. All she knew was that she had been talking about it for a good while. Jane fought through another yawn before Maura finally stopped talking. "You're tired." She said simply.

"No." Jane denied childishly.

"What was I talking about then?" Maura challenged.

Jane paused wracking her brain for an answer. "The…origin of…sporks?"

Maura gave an unladylike snort at the half-hearted guess. "Not even close." She stood clearing their food before grabbing Jane's arm. "Time for bed."

* * *

**A/N: **Thanks for reading and everything really guys y'all are awesome!


	17. Home Improvement

**A/N: **Fair warning, it's one AM right now so if there's a(re) weird mistake(s) and I didn't catch them, sorry. I'll fix it in the morning.

**Disclaimer: **Don't own characters. Not making money. ETC.

* * *

Light sunlight and the sound of birds chirping outside filled the room. Maura Isles slowly blinked and let out a long sigh stretching the length of her body on the bed. Not too surprisingly Jane was still asleep. Maura stayed in the bed sighing contentedly. After a few seconds of just listening to Jane's soft even breathing Maura couldn't help but roll onto her side to look at the woman lying in her bed. She smiled softly. Jane was on her stomach one arm was fully extended under the pillow, she could just make out a hand near the headboard. Dark unruly curls spread in all direction. She bit her lip.

Jane was her best friend and so, so much more than just that. She'd somehow always been more, only Maura could never place it until that day in the bathroom. It was funny, really. She had seen men dressed in the finest tuxedos the world had to offer. Handsome men with handsome eyes and a muscled physique but it was Jane half clothed that did her in. Jane's personality was always attractive to her. It was why they connected so well on so many levels. Physically though the thought never occurred to her. Sure, Jane was physically attractive, she had eyes after all, but the hearty pull on her internal organs was never there. Wanting to kiss her or hold her or feel Jane's skin against hers – that need was never there and suddenly it was. Her head was still reeling trying to catch up with the rest of her body, with time. She was never a fast thinker. She needed time to deliberate, to process, to think of every tiny detail. It was still surreal to her, that she was dating Jane Rizzoli, a woman and her best friend.

Maura never thought of herself as much of a believer in anything that didn't have hard scientific backing. But her mother was an artist and she grew up learning about those wide concepts that breached that hard-lined scientific barrier. She learned of the Big Ideas like love and faith and humanity through art, through her mother's eyes. It was with these big ideas that she always, _always _found herself falling hard and fast for many of her romantic escapades, especially of those few that dared to get close to her.

Garrett Fairfield had been the first. It was his charm, his smile, his kindness. She was so young, barely no longer a teenager, and he helped her through so much. Then there was Ian. Ian and Africa. It was hardly even a choice, not a conscious one at the least. They were both there doing good work, helping those that needed it most. He was handsome and compassionate and funny. Like she and Garrett, they both grew up. She needed to go back to the states and he needed to stay. She never realized how toxic their relationship after that was, until Jane practically shoved it in her face. And there was Jane again, once more weaving her way into her subconscious thoughts. What was it with Jane that brought her in? What about the detective had been the driving force? Where was the big idea? The grand scheme? Did the stars just align one night and create this big…_thing _out of pure coincidence? Or were they always destined for more?

Maura knew asking those types of questions was fruitless. They were highly open ended with no clear backing or foundation of anything. She did know that there was a type of love where Jane was concerned. Of course there was the deep rooted friendship love ever constant in the background, but there was also something budding, growing underneath it. It was silly, to be thinking of all of these things so soon. Silly to wonder and to speculate, but for how silly it was she couldn't stop her brain from thinking of the possibility of being in love with Jane. The kind of love she had with Garrett and Ian, the kind that her parents had for each other. It was such a rare thing to even have, but that thought was there ever present in the far corners of her mind.

There were things Jane brought to the table that she didn't even know she wanted. Or wanted but never thought she would have, because something inside of her was defective. Like the fact of how warm her bed was when Jane slept over. With men, one night stands, hasty boyfriends, Mr. Right Now, the bed never felt so warm. With them she never had the urge to roll over and touch their shoulder or back or hip. Jane's funniness was also something she'd never accounted on wanting. She'd almost always been with serious people, straight-laced, no nonsense people. Her parents were like that even. Growing up in the environment she did was like that. Even if she didn't get Jane's brand of sarcasm most often it was still a large refresher to the crimes and the gruesome murders and to what she had always been accustomed to. There was so much more to the list and her mind was about to go into another round of Jane centric thoughts when the person in question picked her head up with a groan.

Jane grabbed the pillow that was underneath her head and threw it at Maura half-heartedly. "Go to sleep." She slurred dropping her head back to the bed and burying herself under the mountains of white and blue comforter and sheets.

Maura laughed softly. She looked towards the clock. "It's nine AM." She was shocked herself by the time, but Jane seemed to think otherwise. All she got back in response was a grunt. Maura put the pillow on what she assumed to be Jane's back and stood from the bed.

"Where are you going?" Jane whined still buried under the covers.

"To get ready for the day and make breakfast." Maura walked into the bathroom with a smile on her face. It quickly disappeared when she felt water around the base of her sink. "That's strange."

Jane rolled over in the bed. The bathroom door was open and she could hear Maura clearly. "What's strange?"

"There's water around the sink."

Jane stood from the bed with a stretch and rubbed her eyes before walking into the room behind Maura. She took a look at the sink. "You," She poked Maura in the ribs. "Have a leaky faucet."

"Oh, dear."

"I can fix it for you." Jane offered.

"I can just call a plumber." Maura reasoned.

Jane rolled her eyes. "I know how to do this Maur." Jane pushed her on the hip lightly to get her to move sideways and give her more room. Jane bent down and opened the cabinet under the sink. She turned the sink valves off and stood back up. "Really, it's not that complicated. Plumbing with my dad was my summer job, every summer. I can do this blindfolded and upside down."

"I'm not questioning your ability. It's your day off I don't want you forced into doing more work."

"You're not forcing me, I'm offering." Maura still didn't look too convinced. "Okay think of it this way: would you rather have some guy in your home, stinking up the place with his BO and overcharging you for a simple home repair job. _Or, _would you rather have your plumber's daughter of a girlfriend do it free of charge?"

Maura caught the label Jane had thrown in the middle of that sentence. She didn't know if Jane was aware she'd even said it, but Maura was. Her heart fluttered in her chest hopefully. "Is that what we are, Jane?"

Jane's voice had caught in her throat. She didn't mean to let the word slip, but it had. Not that she didn't want to be Maura's…girlfriend, it just made everything seem so final, so real. She looked to Maura's eyes surprised by openness there and the hope obviously lying at the front. It was like her whole world depended on what Jane was about to say. Jane swallowed thickly. It was too early for this. She hadn't even brushed her teeth yet. _No _was an obvious non-choice, but it was just about getting the strength to say yes that was befuddling her. She needed more sleep, or a shower, or to be wearing actual clothes rather than pajamas. But Maura was standing in front of her waiting for the answer. "Yes." The smile that slowly formed across Maura's face was well worth the explosion of butterflies swarming around in her stomach.

"Then you can fix my sink, and for payment –"

"Maura."

Maura ignored her. "I'm going to take you out to The Dirty Robber tonight and buy you a beer and a burger."

Jane raised an eyebrow. "I get both? With no complaints?"

Maura nodded her head. "If you fix my sink right." She smiled coyly. "So what do you need to fix it?"

Jane nodded turning back to the sink. "Well, first I'm going to need some coffee and to brush my teeth so…"

…

"_Shit." _Maura looked sharply towards the bathroom at the sound of something clattering to the floor. She could just see Jane's ass as she bent over the sink. It was most definitely not the first curse to fall from the detective's mouth in the short time she'd been working on the sink but that one had a frenzied tone to it. One that made her walk into the bathroom to see if her girlfriend was alright. _Girlfriend, _that's what Jane had called them. She had a label for their relationship and it made her undeniably happy that she and Jane were on the same page.

"Are you all…" The question died on her lips at the scene in front of her. Her sink was dismantled, as Jane said it would be, but the tall woman was holding her fingers to the bridge of her nose with watery eyes. She raised her eyebrows.

"It's fine." Jane insisted dropping her hands to her hips in an effort to look more dominate. The image was clearly overshadowed though by her watery eyes and slightly red cheek and nose. Maura tried very hard not to laugh. She took a step forward. Jane took one back. "It's not broken." She tried again holding a hand up to stop Maura. "It's probably not even going to bruise."

"Stop being a baby, sit down." Maura interrupted pointing to the toilet. Jane pouted but did as she was told because Maura was bossy. "Are you going to tell me what happened?" Maura asked before reaching out and wiping away the tear that escaped Jane's left eye. She touched the red spot on her nose lightly.

Jane stuck out her bottom lip and crossed her arms, clearly pouting, clearly not wanting to say how it happened. "We need to go to the hardware store. The reason it was leaking was because your rubber washer, spring duo got worn out. So we need to buy a replacement." There was a pause in her speech as Maura took her hand away. "I hit myself in the face." The brunette finally answered. "I was pulling the valve system out of the faucet and well," She mimicked the move with her arm.

Maura worried her bottom lip trying to not let herself laugh. She kissed the red spot on Jane's nose lightly. "You're cute."

Jane groaned sticking her tongue out at Maura as she pulled away. "I'm a badass. I am _not_ cute."

That time Maura did laugh. "Oh?"

"Yep." Jane said with a nod of her head. She walked towards the sink picking up the needle nose pliers. She stood over the sink working at something for a moment before coming away with a rubber washer and spring. She put the washer in the front pocket of her jeans and grabbed Maura's hand. "Come on, the faster we get this done the faster I can have a burger and watch the Pats play."

At the hardware store Maura tried to pay attention to what Jane was talking about. Under normal circumstances she would take the opportunity to learn things about basic plumbing. But Jane was using words she didn't even know in reference to her sink. She was talking about valve systems and soldered pipes and sink stoppers. She was sure if she could just get over one small fact that it would've all been perfectly clear to understand, but she couldn't get over that one fact. Because that one fact was highly, highly distracting. Jane talking about the plumbing in her bathroom was an unexpected turn on. The way she talked to the man helping them, the timber in her voice, the confidence shining through her dark eyes and the impressed look the man aimed back at her words made her want to kiss Jane like she'd never been kissed before. She didn't know what it was about the detective that made her feel like such a teenager at times but she hoped that on some level it wouldn't go away.

When they got back to the house Jane practically ran upstairs with the little baggy they got from the store. The game was going to be on later that night and she still had to go to The Robber with Maura after she was done. Maura followed her calmly up the stairs. By the time she got there Jane was putting what she assumed to be the last touches on the sink. Maura leaned against the doorframe and watched Jane work. She stood there for probably five minutes or more just staring at her detective. She watched the muscles in Jane's forearm contract as she twisted the screwdriver in her hand. She watched her bend over sticking her head under the sink before going back up to her full height.

Jane turned the faucet and as predicted water came out where it should be and not anywhere it shouldn't. She threw her hands in the air in triumph but before she could gloat Maura had her pinned to the bathroom counter crushing their lips together. The sink was still running behind them before Maura reached with a shaky hand to turn it off.

Jane wondered when the fire in her belly at Maura's touch would ever wear off. It was weird that kissing a woman – kissing Maura – didn't totally freak her out. It was weird that she liked it. It was still a weird thought that she could turn Maura on. It wasn't so weird that Maura turned _her _on because she was convinced Maura could turn on a fence post if she smiled the right way. That was a terrible analogy, but she couldn't think straight or process anything except for Maura's mouth moving fast against hers, the taste of her lip gloss and the feel of her body pressed tightly against her own. It was all hands in hair and ragged breaths through noses. It was a make out session in its purest form. Jane couldn't even remember when the last time kissing someone felt so damn good. It wasn't until Maura's lips moved to her jawline then neck and her hands slid from hips to waist to lower back that she regained some semblance of organized thought back into her brain. "Maura," She groaned turning her head toward the ceiling to allow Maura more space to work with on her neck. The doctor hummed against her neck and Jane felt an electrifying jolt go down the length of her spine at the vibrations from the sound. "You owe me a beer." The second Maura stepped away from her Jane immediately missed the contact.

Maura took a deep breath trying to compose herself. She took in Jane's dark hooded eyes and heavy dilated pupils and knew the other woman was just as aroused as she was. Maura nodded her head. "And a burger."

Jane gave a short nod before stepping around Maura. "Well, I'm going to let you get ready and I'll be in the living room waiting."

…

They sat across from each other at their usual booth in the Robber. The silence that followed after giving their order to the waitress was not an uncomfortable one. It gave them a moment to breathe, to take a step back and process it all. A lot of things had changed between them, a lot of seemingly crazy, unexpected things. Like making out in the bathroom or on the floor of Jane's apartment or the roof or in front of Maura's front door. And there were other things that they probably weren't even aware of that had changed. Jane took a long swig of her beer for lack of something better to do. "I'm sorry." Jane swallowed hard furrowing her eyebrows in confusion at Maura's words. "Last night," Maura clarified. "I shouldn't have hung up on you. It was highly uncharacteristic of me and I'll do my best to make sure it doesn't happen again."

"Maura," Jane said patiently leaning forward in the booth. "As much as I like to tease you about being a cyborg, you're actually not one. You're a human being. Humans do rash things. Hell, look at my track record for all your scientific evidence." She reached across the table and gave Maura's hand a gently squeeze. She didn't even care that they were in the robber or that people that worked at the precinct were probably there. It didn't matter anyway. "It's okay, really. I could've told you before I left we probably weren't going to make it to that reservation. I could've not jumped to a conclusion when I saw my brother at your door. I don't usually do that and if we have plans for the most part I tell you in advance in I'm going to make them or not. We're human, Maur. There's a bit of a learning curve here and that's okay."

The honey blond doctor nodded her head looking a little more assured. "I just don't want you thinking I'm making you choose between work or me. That's not what I intended."

Silence enveloped them once more as Jane tried to find the right words to say. "You wanted to know if I'd come after work, and I said no." She shrugged. "That's not you _or_ the job, that's me and you _after_ the job." Another slight pause. "I get sucked into my work a lot. You know that as my friend and I don't think that's going to change as my girlfriend. But I don't want you to be afraid to tell me when I've been working too much or when you want some of my attention. Like there's a difference between a flat out ultimatum and just wanting to hang out more. You know what I'm saying?"

"I think I do."

"Good." The waitress came with their food and another beer for Jane.

After the woman left Maura took the time to ask another question. "Would you have really let me go that easily?" She asked nonchalantly as she cut up her salad.

Jane stopped moving a fry midway between the plate and her mouth. "Hell no." She threw the French fry into her mouth. "I wouldn't have even gotten to the car before turning back around." She laughed pointing a fry at Maura. "And if I did get to the car I would've just sat there unable to leave thinking about how much of an idiot I am." She took a sip of beer. "There probably would have been a list of reasons why I was the better option, maybe a PowerPoint presentation if I had the time." She took a bite of her burger.

Maura laughed. "What kind of things would be on this list of yours?" She asked quietly taking a small bite of her salad and a drink of her water.

Jane threw another French fry into her mouth. "Well, first I'd probably want you to get a CAT scan or something, because Tommy? Really?" As their laughter died Jane bit her lip before continuing. "If we weren't…in a relationship yet and I was aware of my feelings I'd probably do something really stupid like kiss you in front of my mother or in the middle of the bullpen or at a crime scene just to prove my point. I'd probably say something overly done like 'he doesn't deserve you.' But knowing me, I'd backtrack and say I probably don't either but out of the two of us I'm obviously the better option. And after I would get done with this long winded speech and thoroughly embarrassing myself and if you still wanted Tommy, I'd have no choice but to accept it. Because all I'd really want for you is to be happy, even if I was miserable."

Maura's eyes met soft, loving brown ones. She leaned forward like Jane was. "Like I said last night, you don't have to worry about Tommy, because you're the only Rizzoli that I want. The only person that I want, really." And then Jane did something completely unexpected but not totally unwelcome. Maybe it was the beer and a half already in her system or the way Maura was staring at her with those kind, loving hazel eyes, but either way she found herself coming to a semi standing position. She took one look around the room to make sure no one was staring at them. Leaning across the table she hastily kissed Maura on the lips before sitting back down. Her face was bright red and she couldn't stop fidgeting with her hands. No one came up to their table, no one laughed, and there were no catcalls. People were far too preoccupied by the pregame show on the TV's or having their own fun to even notice them. It felt nice.

…

By halftime Jane was asleep with her head resting on Maura's shoulder. She held the remote loosely in one hand and a beer in the other. Maura yawned once and made an executive decision. Gently she took the beer from Jane's grasp and repositioned Jane's head to the back of the couch before she stood. She finished off the rest of the beer (which was only two swallows) and put the bottle in the correct recycle area. She walked back to Jane and gently shook her shoulder. She imagined Jane would be much more comfortable in pajamas and on an actual bed rather than in street clothes and on the couch. "Sweetie," The nickname rolled off her tongue before she could process it fully.

Jane jerked away blinking rapidly. "What time is it?"

"Time for you to go to bed, you've been extra tired lately." Maura mused. Jane nodded her head not knowing the answer to the question. All she knew was that she kind of felt like shit. And the Patriots were losing. So she stood and followed Maura upstairs. "I moved all of your things from the guest room to my room while you were working on the sink. I hope you don't mind."

"Not at all." Jane said through a yawn. Maura showed her where all her things were. After both of their routines they laid in bed. The second Jane's head hit the pillow she was out like a light. Maura wasn't that far behind her.

* * *

**A/N: **This story has officially broken 200 reviews! That makes me so excited! Yay! Thank you all very much!


	18. Touch Football and Finding Out

**Disclaimer: **Don't own the characters. Not making money. ETC.

* * *

Jane sat at her desk Monday morning with her feet propped up daring the nun in the corner of the room to even think about doing something because she was Jane Rizzoli and she didn't like being told what to do. She was flipping through an old case file when someone sat in the empty chair next to her desk. As the overwhelming smell of familiar cologne hit her nostrils she looked up from the file with an eyebrow raised. "What do you want, Mathews?"

He laughed. "Same old Rizzoli I see." He grabbed her feet and put them on the floor. "Hasn't anyone ever told you not to put your feet on the furniture?"

"Might've mentioned it once or twice." She grunted putting her feet back on the desk. "But I've been told I'm not one to follow the rules." She smirked.

"No, you are not." He replied with a small smile.

Jane could almost see the boy she knew growing up underneath the reddish brown scruff on his chin and the twinkle in his blue eyes. He was only a shadow of his former self, a gawky teenager without a place to really fit in. Like her he had found himself in the blue, the shield, and the gun. "Where do they have you now?"

He sat up a little higher in his chair. "Gang Unit."

Jane nodded her head, a little impressed. "Nice."

He laughed leaning back in the chair interlocking his fingers behind his head. "Long cry from getting shoved into lockers huh?"

Jane laughed in agreement. "So, not that I'm not enjoying catching up, but we _are _on company time so do you have info on a murder or…?" She trailed off giving him an expectant look.

"Touch Football." He said with a huge grin on his face. "You in?"

"Not on your team." Jane automatically replied.

"You never were on my team, were you?" Greg said with a reminiscent laugh.

"Hey! I was always on your side."

"Not the kind of team I was talking about." He laughed before pulling out a pocket-sized notebook from the inside of his beaten up jacket. "We've got five teams. The Gang Unit," He pointed to his chest with a smug look on his face. "I'm captain." His grin exploded at Jane's raised eyebrow. "I know, right? I tell ya' being a cop is the best decision I ever made." He looked back at the paper. "The Drug Unit, Organized Crime, Traffic, and Canine."

"Canine? They never play anything."

"Well, they are now." He shrugged. "We all want a sixth team though. Figured you wouldn't forgive me if I skipped over you. So, you want to be the captain for the Homicide Unit?"

"You're on." They shook hands.

He grabbed a pen from Jane's desk. "So I figure I know who you want but to be all official, five players to a team, go."

"Dr. Isles." Jane said the first name that popped into her head.

He wrote the name down. "You know I've never worked with her but I hear she's real smart and sexy." He rushed the last two words out. Jane narrowed her eyes at him before smacking him with the folder in her hand. "Hey!" He yelled in defense. "Do you know if she's taken? 'Cause I have this friend." He laughed knowing he was probably going to get smacked again.

"None of your business!" She pointed to the paper in his hands. "Frost, Frankie, and Korsak."

He laughed writing the names down as she said them. "Yup, figured as much." He put the notebook back into his coat pocket. He stood from the chair bending over slightly in a half-bow. "It was good working with you again detective. I'll e-mail you the schedule." He started walking backwards. "Oh, before I forget, are _you _seeing anyone?" He smirked. "Because I know this nice restaurant that has really great beer…"

"Out." Jane yelled throwing a paper ball at his face.

He caught it waving a finger in her direction. "Faster reflexes now, Rizzoli. We should do this again sometime, and catch up for real." He turned around after he was done talking and almost ran into Maura on his way out. Jane shook her head all of his talk and he was still just as clumsy as he was as a teenager. Jane could hear a muffled apology as he reached over to steady the medical examiner from falling.

Jane was already forming plays and strategies in her head as he walked away. She was already thinking of Maura as her secret weapon. No one would suspect the medical examiner to be good at sports which meant they wouldn't block her as well as they should. And, she figured, Maura could probably outrun half the guys in the precinct. Hell, Maura could outrun _her _and _she _could outrun half the guys in the department. Then there was Korsak who was the quarterback in high school. With both Frost and Frankie too she couldn't help the grin that formed across her face. Homicide was definitely going to win it all.

Maura smiled politely at the man as he walked towards the stairs reaching for his cell phone. She righted her blazer before walking towards Jane. Of course Maura thought the smile on her face had more to do with the man than a touch football league trophy. She was not a possessive person by nature but something in the lanky detective seemed to bring it out of her. She found herself narrowing her eyes at the smell of the man's cologne. Jane finally dropped her feet to the ground. "Who was that?" Maura asked pointing in the direction the man left..

"A friend." Jane answered. She motioned for Maura to sit.

Maura sat. "I've never met him before." She continued treading lightly in the unfamiliar territory.

Jane rolled her eyes and sat up straighter in her seat. "Are you jealous?"

"I am not jealous. I am merely inquiring about your friend."

"Because you're jealous?" This time it was Maura who rolled her eyes. "What you told me over the weekend goes for you too." Jane said softly hoping Maura got her point. "I have a proposition for you though."

Maura's eyes softened. "What kind of proposition?"

"How do you feel about touch football?" Jane raised both of her eyebrows and bit her bottom lip in an excited fashion.

"What's touch football?"

"Oh my god, woman!" Jane groaned throwing her head back. She ignored the look Korsak gave her as he walked by with his morning coffee. Jane stood to her feet and walked towards the elevator. Maura stood and followed as she knew was expected of her. "Touch football," Jane explained as the elevator doors closed. "Is a fundamental American past time." They walked out to the lobby and into the café. She looked at Maura in all of her black skirt, blue blouse, high heeled glory. "On second thought maybe you don't want to play." Jane playfully jabbed before telling her mother she wanted coffee for her and Maura.

"I can play!" Maura defended crossing her arms over her chest giving her girlfriend a stern look.

Jane smirked knowing she won. "Good, cause you're on my team." She ordered coffees for her and Frost, letting Maura tell her mother the complicated concoction she preferred. She paid and picked up the two cups before going to the sugar station while Maura followed with her own cup. Angela narrowed her eyes at her daughter as she picked up the two drinks. Something was different about Jane. It was something she couldn't quite place, but there was a change there, a subtle difference.

Her oldest was always the easiest to read, her emotions were always right on her sleeve. When she was angry doors slammed and she stomped all around the house, when she was happy it was the complete opposite of that. But she could never figure out what put Jane in those moods. As easy to read as she was she kept her cards to herself, tightly against her chest. Whatever she was willing to give was going to have to be enough, because she wouldn't give anyone the other option. Angela helped the other customers in line but kept a steady eye on her daughter.

She watched as Jane talked animatedly to Maura. Angela saw how Maura's own eyes lit up at certain words, both of them laughing occasionally. A thought finally occurred to her as Maura and Jane parted ways. Maura would know why Jane was acting differently. She would have to ask her one day, one day soon, perhaps that very night.

…

"_Maura." _Jane groaned stomping her foot. They were in a sporting goods store of Jane's choosing, because Maura needed practice clothes for the football league. Maura was locked away in the dressing room and refusing to come out.

She felt ridiculous in the shorts and t-shirt Jane picked out for her. "The shorts are too long." She said through the door. When Jane mentioned shopping while she was in the midst of a pile of paperwork dri-fit tees and oversized shorts were not what she imagined. Her mind had been stuck on dresses and high heels, a new suit for Jane perhaps or slacks for herself. Instead she was in a sporting goods store trying on shorts and looking at long socks. She didn't wear shorts. She wore form fitting capris and running tights. They were perfect for her preferred sports and she just didn't understand why they weren't perfect for touch football. After Jane had explained the rules, which weren't very rule like in her opinion, running was all she was going to be doing anyway so she just didn't understand why she had to look like a frumpy teenager.

"They're supposed to be long, Maura." The frustration was clearly evident in Jane's voice.

"I don't wear shorts, Jane."

Jane rolled her eyes at the door. Maura was definitely giving her a run for her money. "It's touch football. We wear shorts."

On the other side of the door, Maura pouted at the mirror. She ran her fingers over the nylon shorts that went almost to her knees. "Well, these are too baggy."

"You just said they were too long."

"They are too long _and_ too baggy." Maura countered ignoring Jane's frustration.

Jane sighed in defeat on the other side of the door. "How about we make a deal?"

There was a pause on the other side of the door. Jane felt like she was making a deal with the devil. Maura fingered the baggy t-shirt before hesitantly speaking. "What kind of deal?"

"If you behave and find some shorts to wear and a couple t-shirts to practice in, I'll let you take me shopping to buy a new suit." She paused before quickly adding. "Later, not today because I'm tired." Jane grimaced as the words came out, hating herself just a little bit. Finally, the door opened but Jane didn't feel like she won much of anything. She gave Maura a once over. The shorts, Jane admitted were a little long and the top was far too baggy for Maura. The pout on Maura's face though made her laugh. "You're adorable." Jane said trying to stifle her laughter. "And I agree. You need smaller sizes. So," She pointed at Maura. "You stay and change. I'll be back." Maura glared at Jane's back. She was so getting her payback later.

True to her word Jane was back knocking on the door not even five minutes later with another pile of clothes. Maura gave her the ones she'd already tried before going back into the dressing room. "These shorts are still too baggy." Maura complained as she opened the door.

Jane looked at the shorts and the new top. "One, you're wearing them wrong." The honey-blond looked down at the shorts wondering how the hell she could manage to put them on wrong. "And two, you're not used to them so of course they're going to feel baggy." Jane took Maura by the shoulder and pushed her back into the room. She locked the door behind her. She turned Maura so they faced the mirror. "There's a lot of different ways people wear their shorts. Some go for the low slung look." She pulled Maura's shirt up so that she could see the waistband of the shorts and undershorts she picked out for her. She tried not to let her eyes (or hands for that matter) wander to the new portion of exposed skin. Her thoughts were strictly about clothing and sports. But suddenly they started to veer and she couldn't quite get them back on track.

She gestured for Maura to hold the shirt in place, thinking that maybe if she put a little bit of space between them the heat on her face would die down. That thought quickly faded as she put her hands on Maura's hips dragging the thin nylon shorts down an inch revealing the top of the black undershorts. Jane bit her lip. She was suddenly very, very glad she'd given her the pair of compression shorts to wear underneath the actual shorts. Otherwise, she gulped, she'd probably be staring at lacy underthings and that was a mountain she was most definitely not ready to climb. Or to even think about climbing.

Maura's breath caught in her throat as Jane's hands pulled the shorts lower. She had no idea when she developed this type of visceral reaction to Jane's simple touch but it was there burning deep within her. She desired nothing more than to push the detective against the wall and kiss her until they were both breathless, to take the shorts off completely. But then Jane's voice was in her ear again.

After a moment of silence Jane sighed resting her chin on Maura's shoulder. She was so ready to be done with this whole shopping extravaganza. She wanted to go home, or to Maura's place. Anywhere where her body wasn't pressed into the small honey-blonde's, where her hands didn't want to roam over the expanse of exposed midriff because that midriff wouldn't be exposed if they were at one of their homes. She was an athlete in high school, she'd worked out with Maura. She'd seen women in very little clothing throughout her life in locker rooms and she had never felt such a distinctive attraction for the female body as she did for Maura's. With Maura she felt it all. Maybe it was because she knew Maura's personality or she'd already kissed her, multiple times. Whatever it was, Maura had something that did it for her and she wanted to distance herself from whatever it was as soon as possible. She wanted to go home. And they'd only been there an hour. That must have been a new record. "You didn't hear a word I said did you?" She mumbled not remembering exactly what she said either.

Maura blushed. "You're highly distracting."

"Oh really?" Jane couldn't help the smirk that danced across her face as she wrapped her arms around Maura's exposed waist. To Jane's delight the skin of Maura's firm stomach was just as soft as her hands were.

Maura nudged her in the ribs with her elbow. "Stop smirking, it's unbecoming."

"Err, right." Jane coughed trying and failing to get the smirk off her face. "Do you like wearing them this way?" Maura shot her a look in the mirror. It was the same look Maura gave her when she asked if her suit was okay to wear to La Beau Truc to interrogate that baseball player. She laughed. "I'll take that as a strong no." Jane brought her hands back to the shorts. "The other way is the classic roll. Just take the top of the shorts like so and roll them over once or twice." Jane rolled the top of the shorts once as she spoke. "How 'bout that?"

Maura looked down at the shorts and took a couple steps around the room. Her body welcomed the distance between her and Jane. They still felt strange but they would do. She looked at Jane. "How do you wear your shorts?"

Jane pointed to Maura's lower half. "When I play sports I wear them like that." She unlocked the door. "I'm going to find you some long socks while you change." Maura nodded her head.

…

Later that night Maura was in her home getting ready for movie night. Jane was coming back with Jo Friday, a movie, and an overnight bag. It wasn't strange or entirely different to have Jane stay the night frequently. They usually stayed up talking until late or worked on cases together, shooting ideas off one another until the early hours of the morning. It always ended up being easier and safer for them to stay at whoever's house they were at for the night rather than drive tiredly home. It was a habit of convenience she told herself. It was no different after their relationship moved into an entirely new direction. Only they slept in the same bed and sometimes cuddled. Maura's face flushed at the thought as she cut up Bass some cactus pads and strawberries.

Angela Rizzoli walked into Maura's home as she usually did, unannounced. She knew Maura was alone and not asleep. There wasn't a car in the driveway and the lights were on in the house. She kept thinking about her daughter while she cooked herself dinner. The nagging notion that Maura knew something that she didn't was driving her to insanity. So she stood in Maura's kitchen facing the woman who had become her daughter's best friend fishing for information. After making her presence known she spoke. "Maura, can I ask you a question?" She wasted no time to get to her point.

Maura looked up at the woman a curious expression on her face. She put Bass's food down in front of him. "Of course, Angela." Maura continued moving about the kitchen. She poured the pan of popcorn into a bowl lightly dousing it with salt and butter. Although slightly unhealthy it was the only way Jane claimed there was to eat popcorn.

"Are you expecting company?" Angela asked slyly. "I can come back later."

"It's just, Jane." Maura answered smiling slightly as she turned to face the woman completely.

"Speaking of Jane, do you know if she's seeing someone?" Angela asked getting straight to the point. The question was meant to bait the doctor into telling her something that Jane would have refused to tell her. Truth was she stayed in Maura's guest house. She knew Jane had been there in the early mornings lately. She knew the looks between the two had changed. Jane could deny her all day, and shut her out in the cold but Maura, well, Maura couldn't lie. And _that _she decided was the key.

Maura took a moment to think of a way to deflect the question or answer in a way that wouldn't out Jane to her mother. She and Jane hadn't even spoken about telling people. There was the kiss in The Robber so she assumed Jane didn't mind if people knew, but she wasn't going to be the one to break the news to Jane's own mother without talking it through with the detective. Even with her social awkwardness she knew there was a line there and she didn't want to cross it. "You should really ask Jane that, Angela."

"You know how Jane gets. She'll go all defensive and then she'll get mad at me. I've noticed she seems different. Have you noticed that?"

"I have." She said coolly trying not to give her hand away. She looked at her watch. Jane was supposed to be there any minute, she just wished she'd hurry up.

"So, you're her best friend. Surely you know who it is right?" The older woman gushed conspiratorially leaning into Maura's space.

Maura took an evening breath. She could deflect open ended questions all day long if she had to, but Angela had asked her a close ended question. There was no way out of this conversation. She looked at the popcorn bowl. "Did you know the inventor of large scale popcorn machines was a man named Charles Cret –"

"Maura." Angela stated very seriously giving the younger woman a look. "I know you know what's different with her. Jane never tells me anything, help a mother out. Jane would be none the wiser."

It would've been easy to do that but she couldn't help but think of what Angela had done with Casey and the note she left in the guise of being Jane. She knew Angela would not keep her mouth shut, then Jane would get mad at her and that was definitely something she didn't want. She did the only thing she could do. She lied. "I – I don't…" Except she couldn't really do that either. Under Angela Rizzoli's no-nonsense gaze she felt her heart rate increase. She felt like that one time when she was in grade school and told her parents she'd done her homework when she actually hadn't. She couldn't quite catch her breath and she felt very hot. The lights in her kitchen seemed far too bright and there was a ringing in her ears that wouldn't go away. Her vision started to blur. This was not good. "I need to…" She mumbled reaching a shaking hand out to the counter only to have it slip up with sweat.

"What the hell?" Jane practically yelled finally walking into the house. She dropped everything she was holding. Jo Friday yipped excitedly at her feet running around in circles at the commotion her human seemed to be apart off. Jane nearly tripped over her leash in her rush to get to Maura.

"I just asked her if you were seeing anyone and she got all…" Angela trailed off waving at Maura's direction unable to explain what was going on.

"And you were just going to stand there?" Jane asked incredulously. Blood was rushing in her head as she wrapped her arms around Maura. She had no idea what she was supposed to do. "Shit." She looked at her mother with wide eyes before it finally hit her. "She faints! What am I supposed to do?" Her mother shrugged her shoulders helplessly at a complete loss.

"I need to lie down." Maura said weakly. She could feel the symptoms starting to wear off as her vision came back but she still felt so incredibly weak.

Jane nodded her head at having a concrete task to do. "I can do that."

…

Ten minutes later her mother was finally out of the house. She rubbed a hand over her face. Movie night was definitely not supposed to go that way. Her mother now knew that she and Maura were dating and was probably calling everyone she'd ever met to tell them that her daughter was dating a doctor. Or something. Jane groaned. She picked up her bag and unleashed Jo Friday before heading to the guest room to brush her teeth and change into her pajamas. But as she walked into the guest bathroom her toothbrush wasn't where it was nor was her toothpaste or face cleaner. She furrowed her eyebrows. She picked up her bag again and headed upstairs, Jo Friday dutifully following behind her. She stepped quietly into Maura's room. The doctor was lying on top of the sheets in the dark with an arm over her eyes. "Jane, did she leave?"

"Yeah." Jane couldn't help the airy laugh that burst from her chest. She moved further into the room. "I can't find my toothbrush…"

Maura dropped her arm to her side and got up on her elbows. "It's in my bathroom. I moved your things from the guest room to my room. I told you that over the weekend. I – I just thought that since we're…together that it would make more sense to…Perhaps it was a bit to forward of me." Jane cut off whatever Maura was going to say next with a soft kiss.

"As fast or as slow as we want remember?" She said softly pulling away. "I do vaguely remember you telling me that, but I guess with all the excitement tonight I forgot." She kissed Maura's forehead before walking to the bathroom. A few minutes later Jane walked to the left side of Maura's bed. She sat so her back was leaning slightly against the headboard. Maura rolled over into Jane's side and wrapped an arm around the other woman's waist. Jane's hand went to Maura's hair gently stroking through it. It was so natural and easy, nothing was forced between them like she feared it might've worked. Jane hoped it stayed that way for as long as possible. "Maura?"

"Hmm?"

Jane bit her lip before continuing. "I appreciate what you did. You know trying to lie to my mother. I know we – uh – we haven't talked about telling people or…or _not _telling people." She rolled her eyes at herself. Even in the darkness, even when she wasn't looking directly into honest hazel eyes, even then she couldn't get her words to come out right.

Maura could feel her eyes getting heavier and heavier as Jane's mesmerizing voice lulled her to sleep.

Jane continued talking none the wiser. "You were going to lie to her for me. Even though you can't lie and that makes me –" She stopped talking abruptly at the sudden thickness in her voice. Where were all of these feelings coming from? She wished they would stop. _Get a grip on yourself, _she told herself before swallowing hard. "It just means a lot to me that you would do something like that for me, that you care that much." She looked down at the woman in her arms. Maura's eyes were closed and she could feel the soft even breaths as they puffed from her mouth. She was probably asleep. Jane smiled to herself as she settled back against the pillow and headboard behind her. "I've never had that before. I've been noticing that a lot lately, that you give me a lot of things I've never had before. Even – even on just a friendship basis. You're like the best, best friend I've ever had." She laughed once. "And now I sound like a sentimental teenager or something." She shook her head at herself. The quietness of the room was empowering in its own right. She continued her impromptu speech somehow feeling like she _needed _to get all of those unsaid things off her chest immediately.

"I'm sorry I made you feel like you had to lie for me though. I just…I want you to be able to tell whoever you want who you're dating. I'm not one for giant parties or whatever. I don't really think it's that big of a deal, honestly. I'm just not one to air all my secrets to the world, you know?" She paused. "What I'm trying to say is that you can tell whoever you want or not tell whoever you want. This morning with Mathews I didn't…I didn't make that clear. But, really Maura, secretly, I want everyone to know." She smiled. "I want everyone to know that I'm dating the prettiest girl on campus…the precinct or lab or…You get the drift." Her hand stopped moving but she left it tangled in honey-blonde hair. "But you can't tell anyone that okay? I know, I know. It doesn't make any sense, but I've been told I'm deceptively complex so…"

She trailed off with a shrug letting the silence overlap her once more. "You know when I saw you earlier looking pale and sick I thought…I thought you were actually sick. Like you were having a heart attack or an allergic reaction or something. I froze for half a second, Maura." She stopped talking to regain her balance. Her own heart was beating heavily in her chest at the fresh memory. She could hear Jo Friday sniff on her doggie bed before going silent again. "I don't freeze, Maura." Jane continued. "But for that half second I did. All of my training meant nothing. If that's even a fraction of what you feel when I come to you bruised and busted then I am truly, truly sorry. I wish – I wish I could say it better or give you a promise about being safer but we both know I'd end up breaking it. And I don't want to make you a promise I can't keep but I'll do my best not to end up on your table. I wish I could do you one better but…"

Maura moved grabbed Jane's free hand bringing it to her lips. "That's more than enough, Jane."

Jane jerked forward at the sound. Despite the comfortable weight pressed into her body she momentarily forgot someone else was in the room with her. "Didn't know you were awake." She blushed thankful that the light was off so Maura wouldn't see.

"You said my name." Maura mumbled sleepily. She yawned before getting to her knees to drag the comforter and sheets down. She leaned up slightly on one arm to give Jane a quick kiss before crawling under the covers. "We've had quite the exciting evening, perhaps it's time to lay this day to rest?"

Jane smiled into the kiss before joining Maura under the blanket. She lifted her right arm for Maura to settle beside her and kissed the crown of her head. They fell into that routine easily much like their entire friendship had been. Jane found herself smiling once more. Why would their growing romantic relationship be any different?

…

Elsewhere in Boston Frankie Rizzoli was walking out of Boston Police Headquarters in street clothes about to go to the Robber for a round with the guys when he received a text from his mother. His sister was dating Maura, like for real. "Yes!" He cheered before running straight back into the precinct. He took the stairs two at a time knowing that Korsak was probably still there pretending to do paperwork but actually watching cat videos online. Finally he burst though the bullpen doors just as Korsak was standing up to leave. "Jane's dating Maura!" Frankie rushed before practically shoving his phone in the older man's face. "Janie's dating Maura, Ma found out first and you owe me thirty bucks!" He shouted proudly.

Korsak grumbled taking the phone from the young officer's hand. He read the message and looked back at Frankie. "You could be making this up." He pointed out.

"I can call Ma." Frankie countered. "She'd be more than willing to gush about it. You know, her daughter dating a doctor and all." Korsak rolled his eye but unlocked a drawer in his desk. Frankie watched with a smug grin on his face while Korsak counted his money out. Money in hand he looked to Korsak. "So you coming out to the Robber tonight or what?"

He shook his head. "I got work in the morning and a dog to feed."

Frankie nodded. "Suit yourself." He shrugged before taking the stairs back down to his car. When he got to The Robber he saw his brother sitting at the bar slowly sipping from a beer looking more than a little pathetic. He caught Frost's eye as he walked in and motioned towards Tommy. They both walked up to the youngest Rizzoli. "What're you moping for?"

"Jane's dating Maura." Was his dejected reply.

Frost raised an eyebrow at Frankie. That was definitely news to him, but judging by the smirk on Frankie's face it was definitely true. He'd have to go to Korsak to collect his earnings later. Frankie smacked Tommy on the back. "You can't be mad about that, bro."

"But I called dibs!" He shouted. "I've been breakin' her down. She was going to cave man, like soon." He said nodding his head.

Frost laughed. "Pretty sure Jane had 'dibs' on the doc _way _before you ever thought you did."

"Yeah," Frankie agreed. "But hey, there's a redhead eyeing you at your nine o'clock." He pat his brother on the back. "Don't say I never did nothing for you." He said as he and Frost left to join the other guys playing darts leaving Tommy to fend for himself.

* * *

**A/N: **You can just pretend they have cases and do actual detective/medical examiner work behind the scenes. I'm not a strong crime writer and that's really not my point for writing this story. I'm only going to bring the crime in when/if it matters.

Thanks for reading!


	19. Freak Out

**A/N: **Sorry for the lateish update. I had a bit of a cold and lots of school stuff.

**Disclaimer: **Don't own characters. Not making money. ETC.

* * *

When Maura woke up the next morning it was to an empty bed. Her first thought was that Jane beat her awake, it was rare but known to happen on occasion. But upon further inspection, the bathroom, kitchen and guestrooms were all vacant and Jane's car was gone. Maura furrowed her eyebrows as she stood in the middle of the kitchen at a complete loss. It wasn't like Jane to just leave in the middle of the night. Nothing out of the ordinary happened the night before unless it had to deal with Angela. Personally she didn't know Angela's reaction. She didn't even know if Jane told her mother anything. She was embarrassed by the whole thing. She hadn't had a near fainting spell like that in a very long time. It was strange because she could lie on a certain level to other people but to her parents, and Angela apparently, she was unable to. They were important people in her life and the thought of lying to them on purpose sent her into near hyperventilation. However, Jane seemed perfectly fine when she came back up the stairs. She even sat and talked for a while, so what happened?

Truthfully Jane was okay when they went to sleep. She was more than okay when Maura kissed her softly goodnight, more than okay when the doctor curled into her side. It was so quickly becoming a habit, and Jane realized it was one she intended on keeping. It was normal and nice and good but somehow in the middle of the night it changed just like it always seemed to when she finally got comfortable with something.

Jane was never a restful sleeper. She found it easier sleeping with someone but under normal circumstances, at home alone she'd wind up all twisted up in the blankets, her tank rising over her ribs and shorts turned at an odd angle. She'd toss and turn and wake up on the other side of the bed. She didn't know if it was her job or just her but she always had trouble sleeping. That was until Maura. Maura was like this safeguard of goodness and when they slept together or even sometimes just in the same house more often than not she slept peacefully. (Unless it was during one of the many turbulent times of serial killers or mobsters.) Before Maura, Jane never wanted to just sleep innocently next to someone so much. It sounded so juvenile, so childish because in the reality of it they were both grown women and well into their thirties. She knew it was strange. In fact if she stopped to think about the events in her life over the last two (almost three) weeks strange was the perfect word for it, everything was just so fucking strange. And that's what hit her at three o'clock in the morning in Maura's bedroom.

Jane jerked awake suddenly unexplainably out of breath, her heart thudding almost painfully loud in her chest. She felt like she'd been falling and suddenly she was wide eyed staring at the ceiling. She lost track of the time as she laid there. She lost track of the seconds and minutes and just listened to the silence that was so deafening to her ears. The same silence that she had reveled in mere hours ago was instantly drowning her.

Her mind was on overdrive. All the little things that she had been ignoring were finally breaching the wall manning an attack on the king's army. She was dating Maura, her best friend…A woman. And her mother knew. If her mother knew chances were Frankie knew and if Frankie knew, Frost probably knew, and if Frost knew Korsak probably knew. She could already see the snowball building, gaining momentum as it rolled down the hill. It wasn't that she wanted to live in hiding with Maura for decades upon decades. She didn't think she was capable of that even if she wanted to. She kissed Maura in the middle of The Robber as it was anyway. But still it was vaguely terrifying to have it out there in the open.

On one hand she wished her mother would've let them go to her on their own terms but she knew she probably never would've gotten the guts to have that conversation. But the conversation she'd been trying to avoid was happening anyway. The words _we'll talk later _had been uttered by her mother as she left the main house for the guest house. And Jane was pretty sure the only reason the woman even left was because Maura nearly fainted and she felt bad about it. She didn't know why it scared her so damn much. It wasn't like her mother sounded angry or upset or sad even. The only emotion Jane could depict on her face as she left was a strange combination of guilt and giddiness. Regardless, a weight fell into the pit of her stomach and an uneasiness sank into her bones in impending doom. She was just not ready.

Maura rolled over taking a small portion of the covers with her and a sliver of Jane's attention. The detective smiled briefly at the woman next to her before it disappeared completely. Things were changing. The basis of the most steadfast thing in her life was changing, morphing into something new. Why so suddenly was that thought so goddam terrifying? It wasn't like she never thought about it before, but it was always in a warm, calming, comfortable way. But this three AM self-talk was anything but warm and calm and comforting. Because she found herself wanting more than juvenile things to happen in the bedroom, she wanted to _sleep _with Maura. Match her curve for glorious curve. She wanted to kiss her softly, roughly, passionately. And it scared the hell out of her.

Things had come a long way in two and a half weeks. They'd started with Jane standing on Maura's doorstep in the early hours of the morning with pulsing courage. She'd told Maura that she was in, all in. But nearly three weeks later and they already had a routine. They slept in the same bed, curled into each other, they held hands and kissed. Were those wants always there, buried beneath other things just waiting for the right time to reveal themselves? Were they there when she took that bullet what felt like years ago? Was it attraction that surged through her veins when Maura touched her bruised skin? Was it the core of why she wanted to kiss the doctor right there so hard and so long that they would both be sent into a breathless oblivion? Was their friendship always destined for more? Korsak called it an unacknowledged crush. He was… well he was right and she should've figured it out sooner, she was a detective after all.

It was the fear. The fear should've tipped her off that something about Maura was different, that the things she felt or could've felt were more than platonic. It should've hit her when Lehey had a gun to Maura's head or when Doyle took her from the morgue. She hit an old man with a baseball bat and when her phone rang she frantically answered _whatever you want I can get it. _And she would've too. She was a cop and she would've given whoever was on the other end anything they could ever want, if it meant she got Maura back. She would've torn apart Boston just to find her. It should've clicked in her brain when Hoyt had them both trapped in a prison infirmary. Because she didn't care about her own life. It was only when Hoyt went after Maura that the thin line holding Jane in check snapped like a bad bone break and all hell broke loose. And again that day in the basement, so recent yet so far gone, when Maura wasn't answering her shouts, when she heard the noise of the struggle – it was nothing but pure unadulterated fear that gripped her heart and traveled like poison through her veins. It wasn't easy to make her feel that way, but the thought of losing Maura always seemed to do it. It was like Jane always knew on some level that if Maura were to ever leave her life for good she would become a different person. Even when they fought she couldn't stay away for long. Because Maura mattered. She always mattered. She mattered because…because love.

_Shit._

Suddenly three AM sounded much louder. It felt as if the bomb she'd been slowly deconstructing just exploded in her face. She couldn't breathe and she couldn't lie still and she couldn't stay there any longer. As quietly as she could she rose out of the bed and tiptoed out of the room, gently closing the door behind her.

At first she was just going to get a drink of water and stretch her legs a bit. But she wound up sitting on the living room floor next to a sleeping Bass and Jo Friday. The little dog in question stood up with a yawn and a stretch before bounding into Jane's lap. Jane smiled softly at the small creature as she absently stroked her fur. She'd never tell Korsak but she loved the little mutt. No matter when Jane came home or how hard the day was Jo was always waiting at the door with a wagging tail.

Just as in the bedroom, she lost track of the time. She didn't know how long she sat on the floor but it was long enough for her butt to go numb and a sharp pain to shoot up her back whenever she moved. She didn't know why but going back into Maura's master bedroom wasn't an option. She stood and briefly thought about leaving a note. After staring blankly at a post-it note she changed her mind. She put the pen back down, grabbed Jo and walked out of the house making sure to lock the place up before getting in her car.

The sun was still down by the time she got home. She dropped her keys on the kitchen counter unleashed Jo and went straight to her bedroom. She fell face first onto her mattress and promptly back to sleep until her phone rang. Blindly, she fumbled for it. "Rizzoli."

…

Angela walked towards Maura's house knocking slightly on the side door. She felt terrible for the night before and wanted to try to make it up to her the best way she knew how: food. Through the window she could see the doctor sitting at the counter drinking slowly from a mug. Maura looked up from her coffee and the newspaper article at the sound. She saw Angela waving at her through the glass windowpane and waved her in. "Hello, Angela." Maura greeted semi-cheerfully as the older woman walked into her home. Maura noticed she was carrying two plates covered in saran wrap.

"I made you an egg white omelet, just the way you like it." Angela said as she unwrapped one of the plate and slid it in front of Maura. She put the other one on the counter.

Maura raised her eyes at the delicious smelling food. She didn't realize how hungry she actually was. "You didn't have to, Angela, but I do appreciate it." She folded the newspaper and placed it to the side and out of the way.

"Nonsense." Angela waved off. "I wanted to apologize for last night." She handed Maura a fork from one of her drawers.

"Really, Angela, it's fine!" Maura reassured as she took a bite of her omelet. "I actually think it's nice how involved you are in your children's lives."

Angela chuckled. "Don't let Jane hear you say that." Maura laughed. "Speaking of, where is she?"

"She went home." Maura answered simply before taking a sip of her coffee.

"Oh, I hope I didn't cause any problems for the two of you." Maura blushed. Hearing her relationship with Jane be affirmed by someone else, particularly Jane's mother, was very surreal. "I was actually hoping to talk to you both but I'll just have to talk to her later."

Before Maura could think up a proper response her phone rang. "Excuse me." She picked up the phone. "Dr. Isles." There was a short moment of pause as the person on the other end spoke. "Yes, I'll be right in."

Angela looked at her. "Well, I have to get to the café and it sounds like you also have somewhere to be."

"Yes." Maura nodded. "I…Just so we're on the same level. You don't mind that I'm dating Jane?" She asked a bit unsure and timid of the question.

Angela smiled sweetly. She took a step closer to Maura putting a comforting hand on her arm. "You make her happy and she makes you happy. Having two happy girls makes me happy. So if you're looking for a nod of approval you definitely have it."

"Thank you, Angela." Maura said slightly nodding her head through tight lips as she tried to keep all of her emotions in check. It was nice to have a mother's approval.

…

Jane reached the crime scene and ducked under the tape after giving her credentials. She took in the blood trail leading to the body and the bloody handprint on the brick wall. The body was in an alley with a bar on one side and a dry cleaner on the other. Frost and Korsak were interviewing people outside of the tape that seemed to have some sort of general information. She sighed quietly before walking closer to the body and coincidently Maura as well. She didn't know why she was trying to avoid Maura. It wasn't like she was mad at her or that Maura even did anything wrong. Jane just needed space. A lot of space. Space that working closely together on a case and staying the night repeatedly wouldn't get her. The revelation she had that morning freaked her out and she needed to get a handle on her shit. As she stepped closer to the body she could feel Maura's eyes on her, scrutinizing her, readying her body language. She probably wanted an explanation or something about that morning but Maura wasn't the only one that could turn it on whenever she wanted to. Jane pulled the latex gloves on her hands before getting down into a squat. "Pretty big knife." She commented pointing to the knife sticking out of the victim's chest.

"Yes," Maura agreed. "Judging by the length of the handle I would approximate that the blade could be anywhere between four to six inches. I'll know more –"

"When you get back to the lab, I know." Jane nodded frowning just slightly. "There's a lot of blood, but not enough. Did he walk here? Was he dragged?"

"Inside the bar," Maura pointed to an open door. "Looks to be where he was initially stabbed. I heard Detective Frost mention the victim could've walked out here, which does appear to be the case. "Jane felt her mask fall a little bit as her lips twitched upwards. "He was struck once more in the shoulder." Jane's eyes followed Maura's hand as she pointed to another bloody wound. "And there appears to be defensive marks on his hands."

Jane nodded slowly before rising to her feet again. "Thanks, I'm going to survey the rest of the scene I'll see you in autopsy."

…

A couple hours and a full cup of coffee later Jane stood in the morgue. She looked at her notes while Maura did the autopsy and spoke into the recorder. The victim was Jerry Davis, he was the owner of the bar and covering for a sick bartender. It was a robbery. They'd gotten lucky and the bar had surveillance videos, but unlucky enough in the fact that the robber was wearing a mask. Korsak was watching the tapes while Frost, wanting to be anywhere _but _the autopsy was running the victim's name through the database. She already called and left a message for the wife. She sighed shutting her notebook. It still amazed her that people could do this type of thing to each other just for a buck, it shouldn't have. She'd been around long enough to know it shouldn't have but sometimes it still did. She could feel Maura's eyes on her again. "Okay, will you stop?" She asked exasperatedly dropping her hands to her sides.

Maura went back to the body. "Stop what?"

"You know what." Jane hissed. "You're doing that weird facial voodoo magic thing you do. You're diagnosing me in your head, stop."

"Did you have trouble sleeping last night?" Maura asked looking up once more at Jane

Jane sighed defeated. "I woke up in the middle of the night and couldn't go back to sleep so I went home." Maura could tell there was more to the story but she didn't press. It was just as well because Jane's phone vibrated on her hip. She read the message from Frost. "Look, I gotta go. Victim's family is here. We can talk later if you want. If you get any results back or find something new, I'll be upstairs."

…

By the time Jane ended her day she was avoiding both the café and the morgue. The café because she was irrationally afraid her mother would either start throwing scripture at her or surprise her with a rainbow cake or something else equally mortifying. She was avoiding the morgue because she told Maura they could talk later but she still didn't know what she was going to say. She'd had a terrible day. She had to tell a wife and mother of three that her husband was dead. It was the absolute worst part of her job watching as that sunk in to someone's skin. She just wanted a hot shower and a cold beer to wash the day away. But the second she walked into her apartment the smell of her mother's cooking assaulted her senses. Her stomach tightened and her palms started to sweat. With each breath she felt her heart thud loudly underneath her ribs. Her mother in the kitchen, the conversation looming in the distance – she felt sick.

Her mind went back to the case that brought them to the lesbian bar. One of her dates asked her how she 'came out.' She just stared awkwardly because she _hadn't _come out. She didn't need to come out, there was nothing to come out for. She was straight. There were men. There was Grant and Dean and Casey and Jorge. With one exception they were all big men with big important jobs. That was all there was ever supposed to be. The same guy over and over just in a different wrapper.

Only that wasn't all there was.

There was her best friend, there was Maura. Quietly in the background always walking in while the big important men left to do their big important jobs. There was Maura who was soft and polite and bossy and cold and warm and comforting and like a cactus all at fucking once. It was a great woman with a big important job. And suddenly Jane found herself flung headfirst into a giant stereotype.

But the thing – the one thing – that bothered her most was her mother. With her stupid brain that morning thinking about thinks like…like love and other stupid, stupid things that she shouldn't have been thinking about she was still trying to catch up with everything. She had been a step behind the whole time but now she was sprinting for her life just to catch up. She was almost there too. Almost ready to jump on the train. She just needed a few more steps, an extra burst of speed and she'd be okay. She never fully appreciated how smooth and easy it had been up to that point. When it was just her and Maura. How easy it was for them to just get lost in each other, in a touch that never meant so much before or a slow kiss or sleeping side by side. It was all hitting her at once and she was left in a daze like a boxer who'd gone one round too many but was too stubborn to tap out. Part of her wanted to go back. Go back to what? She didn't know.

She didn't want to go back to before her and Maura were _her and Maura_. Too much had changed, too many things shifted, and she knew too much. She knew things a…a girlfriend would know. Like the way Maura's lipstick tasted against her lips and how long her nightly routine took and that sometimes when she slept she murmured and stole the covers and how absolutely stunning she was when she first woke up in the morning with her hair a complete mess without any makeup on and the list just went on and on. There were so many things that she had seen, that she wanted to see and keep seeing. They were things that deserved to be paid attention to and be remembered. Because that light was on that dark spot in her brain and she was in. All in.

Jane didn't know why she was so against talking to her mother about anything and everything in the first place, because that was her _real _problem. If she had to guess she would blame it all on the traumatic talks they'd had throughout her lifetime. She shuddered remembering the '_first bra'_ talk and the '_when a girl becomes a woman_' talk and her personal favorite (which happened to be the most traumatizing) was the '_when a man loves a woman_' talk. She couldn't help but wonder if she was going to get one of those talks at nearly thirty-six. What variation was it going to be? '_When a woman loves a woman_?' She nearly laughed at that. Oh god, what if her mother did research about lesbian relationships? Or found groups? Then another horrible thought crossed her mind. What if her mother brought books? Her mother was Italian and loud and proud and would probably go around the café wearing a rainbow colored button while she served her co-workers coffee and dished details about her relationship with Maura. (Was she even a lesbian? Did it even count if it was just _one _woman she wanted?) Her mother made a big deal out of everything. She didn't want to talk to her mother about her relationship with Maura. She didn't want to talk to her mother about anything. But years of experience told her come hell or high water the conversation was going to happen and she was going to take part and it was going to be glorious.

"Jane!" Angela shouted from the kitchen. Jane jumped momentarily stunned by the intrusion on her thoughts. She was still standing in the doorway. Had she been there the whole time? "Dinners ready."

Jane stepped forward not bothering with taking the accessories off of her belt. She didn't care about the gun digging into her hip or that the cuffs had been rubbing her back in an odd way all day. Instead she sat at her own kitchen table in her full "uniform" and not at all comfortable. Angel shook her head at her daughter's behavior. Really, what did Jane think she was going to do disown her? As if she could! She dished out spaghetti onto both of their plates. "Don't look so worried, eat your dinner." Angela said with a small pat to Jane's arm.

Jane's eyes flashed towards her mother. The last time someone told her _'don't look so worried' _she nearly lost her job _and _her best friend. Jane blinked. But that was different than now. She was an adult. She made grown up decisions. Her mother already knew anyway! So really what was the big deal? There wasn't one, or shouldn't have been at the least. Besides, she was a detective, a homicide detective. Danger was practically her middle name. But that wasn't who she was to her mother. To her mother she was a tiny pink blanket. She was coming home with a detention slip and busted knuckles because someone pushed Frankie down and stole his lunchbox. She was Janie, a daughter, not a cop. A glass of wine was being filled to her right but she couldn't even force herself to pick up a fork. The thought would've been calming if she hadn't felt like she was sitting in interrogation. She knew this technique. Make the suspect feel at home, offer him food and water. He'll take it and get comfortable. Then you break him.

Angela sat across from Jane trying not to laugh. "Really, Jane, I'm your mother what do you think I'm going to do?" Jane shrugged, not knowing what to say. "You're my daughter. Eat."

"I'm not really hungry."

"You had a full day of work."

"I'm tired."

Angela sighed frustrated with the situation. It was like Jane was a teenager again. "When have I ever been truly disappointed in you?"

"Is that a trick question?"

"If I was upset with you I wouldn't have left you alone with her last night. The worst possible news you could give me has absolutely nothing to do with who you date. My biggest worry and fear is getting that phone call. Which I've gotten three times now between you and Frankie, mind you." At her mother's pointed look, Jane had the decency to look a little ashamed. "But you dating Maura?" Angela continued. "That's great news!" Jane's shoulders dropped slightly in relief. "I've known she was different since you brought her home to family dinner for the first time. And now that you're dating each other the two of you can stop dragging everyone into your fights." Angela laughed. Jane's lips twitched upwards, this wasn't so bad. "I just want you to be happy. I don't know how long this has been going on between you two but I can tell you're happier and she's happier too. You're you and she is she when the two of you are together, and that is rare and it's wonderful."

In her mother's pause Jane spoke quietly. "This is real, Ma. Maura and I, we're dating and it's real. And I keep thinking that it wasn't supposed to happen but I'm – I'm glad that it did. I've never…I've never…" She trailed off lamely. She couldn't figure out what she was trying to say but one look to her mother's soft expression and she knew her mom knew.

Angela paused to think for a moment. "You weren't supposed to be a cop either, but look how that turned out." She laughed. "Just because it wasn't supposed to happen doesn't mean that it isn't right." She reached across the table giving Jane's hand a squeeze. "You hold onto her Janie, I mean it."

For the first time that night, Jane cracked a smile. "I'll try."

Angela smiled before standing with a yawn. "Well, I'll let you get on with your evening. I have work in the morning."

"Do you need me to drive you home?" Jane offered.

"No, I'll be alright." Angela answered. She walked towards the now standing Jane and wrapped her arms in a hug. "I love you, baby girl."

Jane blushed but wrapped her arms around her mother. "I love you too, Ma." She gave Jane instructions for reheating the spaghetti before leaving.

Once her mother was gone Jane slowly walked into her bedroom. She shed her blazer, socks and shoes and let her pants fall to the floor with a clunk at being overloaded with all of her gear. She gave a bleary eyed Jo Friday a scratch behind her ear before walking into her bathroom. A hot shower was definitely calling her name. She let the sudsy water wash over her skin and let her mind wander. She was pretty damn lucky. She found herself smiling. She had an awesome family, a good dog, and an amazing girlfriend who just so happened to be her best friend. How many people could say that? Those were her three good things.

When she got out of the shower, she grabbed her things off her discarded pants putting them in the dresser where they were supposed to go. She noticed she had a text from Maura.

_Tomorrow night, you order the pizza, I'll bring the salad. I'll be at yours at seven. Goodnight! _

Jane grinned before texting back. She felt like she finally caught the train.

_It's a date, goodnight!_

* * *

**A/N: **Way back in the end of June when I first started writing this it was meant to be more angsty with a lot more actiony bits and stuff but somewehere along the way it took a sharp turn into fluffville and that's pretty much where it's going to stay. Funny how that happens, huh? _  
_

Thanks for reading/reviewing!


	20. You're my Best Friend

**A/N: **So that cold I was complaining about last time kind of turned into a sinus infection type thing so I've spent the last week in bed or wishing I was in bed. But I'm mostly over it now so the updates should get back on schedule. (And I'm glad you guys like the fluff!)

**Disclaimer: **Don't own the characters. Not making money. ETC.

* * *

Most of Maura's job was waiting and if she was being entirely honest, being the Chief Medical Examiner of the Commonwealth of Massachusetts she didn't actually _have _to go out into the field as much as she did. She was supposed to sit behind a desk. She'd tried…once, when she first started. It was mind-numbingly dull and she found herself hovering in the lab wanting to get her hands dirty for a lack of a better phrase. But most of her job was indeed waiting. She did the autopsy and ran her tests and then the waiting game began. Usually, after typing up her reports, she lulled herself into a sort of comfort by browsing through different clothing brands' online collections. That day wasn't unlike the others. She found herself sitting at her desk browsing shoes online. Jane would probably tell her she didn't need any more shoes. She'd probably go on to spill some large hyperbolic sentence that made zero logical sense with that small, almost crooked, forever teasing grin playing on her lips. Her eyes would hold mirth and warmth, two things Jane was always sure to have an abundance of. Maura sighed wistfully at the image that procured in her mind. She rolled her eyes at herself immediately before putting her elbow on her desk and chin in the palm of her hand.

She was hopeless. Jane made her hopeless, completely and utterly hopeless. And she didn't mind one bit. Her relationship – their ever developing dynamic was strange. But the good kind of strange. Maura narrowed her eyes at the air in front of her, as if that was the thing that was puzzling her. When did she start thinking in terms like that? When did she start understanding things on a non-literal basis? She scoffed at herself. Jane was when. It wasn't a change that happened right away but one that took time, much like their closeness. Never in a million years would she have thought a woman in fishnet tights and a leather skirt would become to mean so, so much to her. The woman in the café had intrigued her. The intrigue only expanded when she met that same woman at a crime scene months later, only then she was dressed in a very nice suit with a gun and badge on her hip.

It still baffled her to the day why Jane decided to become her friend. Maura was not an entirely open person or a friendly face. Most detectives and officers, even lab techs at times, shied away from her. They seemed to want to know her but not want to know her at the same time. They preferred to talk of her while she wasn't around (while she was around at times as well) and gave her mean nicknames. She didn't know for the life of her why Jane chose her, why she picked her, or why the hell she stayed around. No one had ever stayed around. They either ran off to chase some other dream that didn't involve her or left when she got too weird. But not Jane. No, Jane was always there somewhere in the background. Even when Maura pushed her away Jane was there. Jane, as terrifying of a thought it was, was her solid ground, her rock. And there she went thinking in metaphors and similes again. She shook her head at herself once more. Hopeless wasn't the only thing she was. She was smitten and enamored and, she paused, she was falling. And she'd already hit terminal velocity.

She sighed as she thought of the detective's words the previous day. There was something the brunette wasn't telling her and she was a little peeved about it. She hated how Jane could (and would often) close in on herself, how she could let her walls cave in making her like a lost miner with no hope of being found. But, Maura mused, no one else probably had the persistence or the patience she was able to dispense to the cause. She was determined to find out what was keeping Jane awake at night. Little did she know the detective was forming a plan of her own as she sorted through crime scene evidence and notes at her own desk.

…

Jane had her nose buried in a folder trying valiantly to focus on the words and the diagrams and the pictures. In fact, she was trying so hard she could feel a headache working its way into her skull, settling in a light, dull, throb reverberating in her brain. Her mother had eased her worry and some of the anxious feeling that led her to leaving Maura's house at nearly four AM was tampered. But she could still feel it in her somewhere like a flame that was not yet put out all the way, just simmering in the debris waiting to ignite again. She didn't want it to ignite again. She couldn't afford for it too, so she was going to do what her mother told her. She was going to try and hold onto Maura for as long as Maura would take her and if that meant "talking about her feelings" then she'd have to just grit her teeth and bare it.

Jane had worked well into lunchtime. She'd gotten lost in the case like she usually did. The only thing alerting her the time was the low grumble that came from her stomach. She ignored it and kept reading the report, making little notes on a post-it before sticking it the edge of her computer. If she was a betting woman her money would be on an ex-employee that was fired a month ago for 'unprofessional behavior.' He had a rap sheet and had done time for assault. She was in the middle of writing his address down when her stomach growled again.

Frost laughed from his position. "You going to feed that thing?" Jane made a face but kept her eyes on paper in front of her. She was so wrapped up in her thoughts she didn't hear Frost leave or hear him sit back down minutes later. But she did notice when he threw a saran wrapped deli sandwich onto her desk and a bottle of water.

Jane looked up a slight grin on her face. "Thanks."

"No, problem." Frost said taking a bite of his own sandwich.

Jane looked around the bullpen and noticed how empty it was. "Where's everyone at? Where'd Korsak go?"

"Lunch." Frost answered.

"You know just because I skip lunch, doesn't mean you have to."

"Who says we're skipping?" They shared a laugh before silence fell over them again. After a moment Frost spoke again. "You watch the game last night?" He asked testing out the water.

Jane narrowed her eyes in suspicion at her sandwich. "Didn't get a chance. It's sitting in my DVR though."

He nodded his head through another bite of his lunch. "It was a good one."

Jane nodded absently, her eyes ghosting over the folder to her right. "I heard."

"So, uh," He cleared his throat before continuing. "Anything new happen in your life lately?"

Jane's head shot up. "What are you doing?" Frost stumbled over his words for a few seconds before Jane cut back in. "Well, stop." She paused flipping through the file. "Besides, I know you know."

"Know what?" Frost asked playing dumb

"You know exactly what I'm talking about." Jane replied not buying his act. "I know you know because Frankie knows and Frankie knows because my mother knows. So stop. We have work to do." She nodded seriously. There was a moment of pause before a smirk crossed her lips. "But yes, it's awesome and I'm happy and no, you don't get any details."

…

It was six thirty by the time Jane made it back to her apartment. The second part of her day was spent in the driver side of her unmarked with Frost beside her. She drove what felt like all over Boston chasing down leads and digging. It was dark by the time the pair made it back to headquarters. With a panicked look at her watch Jane raced towards the stairs to clock out, her mind on one thing or rather one person: Maura. She had a date or plans or a hangout or _whatever _with her at seven. And if she didn't hurry she'd be late to her own house.

Once the pizza had been ordered Jane stood in her living room at a complete loss. _You are one person, _she thought to herself looking around with a grimace, _how can you be so damn messy? _She shook her head before diving straight into it. She swept stray sugar from her kitchen counter into the trash, put her dirty dishes into the dishwasher, dirty clothes in the hamper and made her bed all with enough time to spare to take a shower. Jane most definitely didn't want to smell like sweat and Frost's cologne when her girlfriend, best friend, person thing came over. (Why were labels so fucking hard?)

The shower took more time than she wanted. She shut off the water and wrapped a towel around her body securely before running a second one through her hair. Then she heard a noise that sounded like something falling on tile. Jane narrowed her eyes before walking into her bedroom and grabbing her gun. "Let me see your hands!" Jane yelled fiercely. The intruder stood from behind the counter and Jane immediately lowered her weapon. Maura was staring back at her with wide hazel eyes hands at either side of her head holding a plastic cup in one hand. Jane gave a frustrated huff. "Hasn't anyone ever told you not to sneak into a cop's house?" Jo Friday looked up at the commotion from her bed before lying back down with a snort.

Maura would've thought the situation was funny if she wasn't stuck on Jane standing in front of her in nothing but a fairly short towel, her skin glistening from the shower. The physical part of their relationship was developing the slowest out of everything, but for the most part Maura didn't mind. Only there were times when she was so caught up in an image, imagined or real, of her girlfriend, of Jane, that completely caught her off-guard sending a wave of desire through her body. She almost wanted to laugh remembering back to the first time she felt herself attracted to Jane. She was so naïve to think she could shove that away into a little box. She knew it was a chemical reaction, her body reacting to something she liked, but it was starting to be too much. She found herself in bed alone with a physical ache, a need, for Jane's touch or her mind would drift to an entirely inappropriate fantasy during the workday. And this, _this _version of Jane towel clad and dripping wet was too much.

She was very glad for the island and all the space that separated them because if she were any closer she feared she'd jump the detective right then and there. She licked her lips subconsciously as she tried (and most likely failed) to keep her eyes locked with Jane's slightly amused ones. "You weren't answering the door or phone." She started out shakily. Her eyes roamed down to where the towel folded over on Jane's chest for a split second before catching herself. _Bad Maura, get a hold of yourself, _she thought before readjusting her eyes back to Jane's. "I used my key." She could feel her face flush. She cleared her throat and pointed to the kitchen table. "The pizza came too, and I picked up a salad."

Jane's smirk grew the longer she watched Maura ramble. She raised an eyebrow before nodding. "Yeah, well next time let me know you're here so I don't almost blow your head off."

"You were taking a shower." Maura pointed out. "Did you want me to come in and tell you?" Maura smirked at the dumbfounded look on Jane's face.

It was Jane's turn to blush as she conjured up an entirely unacceptable picture of a very naked Maura entering the shower with her, writhing under her touch as the water sprayed over them. _God, when did this happen? _Jane caught herself thinking for the millionth time. She swallowed hard. She was right the day before. It was all totally, completely, fucking bizarre. Half of her had the mindset that she wasn't supposed to be thinking of Maura like that because she was her best friend but then the other part knew that was stupid because Maura was her girlfriend and she could think naughty thoughts if she damn well pleased. In the end, she shrugged unable to give a proper response and walked back into her bedroom to put some clothes on.

She came back out in sweats and a Sox shirt, her hair slightly damp, face still very significantly red. Maura was just placing two glasses of water onto the table as Jane sat. They ate. Jane complained about being forced to eat the salad and Maura talked about the beginnings of pizza. Their conversation was light and fun as they purposefully avoided heavy topics. They sat on the couch once they finished eating.

"So I'm dating someone." Maura said finally breaking the semi-awkward silence.

Jane darted her eyes towards Maura in question but the medical examiner avoided her gaze opting to instead examine her fingernails. "Do you…do you like this person?" She asked deciding to play along.

"Very much so." Maura nodded. "In fact I think it's getting," She bit her lip. _Why was this so hard?_ "I feel like it's getting serious. But I don't know how to tell her that." She scrunched up her face as she finished not liking the way it sounded coming out of her mouth.

"You should tell her. She probably thinks it's getting serious too and she's probably freaking out about it. It might make her feel better." Jane answered back her heart pounded in her chest.

"Okay." There was a moment of silence before Maura turned her body towards Jane finally maintaining eye contact. "I think this," She gestured between the two of them. "Is getting serious."

Jane couldn't hold back a bark of laughter. She grinned at Maura. "I think it's always been serious." She laughed again shaking her head. "I mean, like do you ever sit and just think how weird this is? If you were to ask me when we first met if I ever thought we'd be dating I would've said hell no."

"Well, you were dressed as a call girl when we first met. That would be my reaction as well." Maura deadpanned.

"Now she jokes." Jane laughed good naturedly.

"I'm sorry." Maura laughed. "Why?"

"Because you're you." Jane shrugged.

"Excuse me?" Maura asked not quite understanding what Jane meant.

Jane rolled her eyes, sobering up immediately. Feelings, talking, relationships, communication. All important things, she could do this. "You're this attractive, gorgeous woman, which in itself is completely weird because that was something I never paid attention to. But now, I'll catch a glimpse of you and it's like 'whoa' and I don't know when or how that happened. And you're incredibly smart and classy and sophisticated and you put up with my family." She took a deep breath. "I feel so stupid because I should've seen this coming but I didn't. I got blindsided by this…this thing and I have no idea why you're with me or even friends with me." She laughed dryly. "All I do is break stuff and embarrass you and –"

"You saved me." Maura interrupted unable to listen to Jane talk that way any longer.

Jane shrugged thinking about all the times Maura's life had been in danger. "It's my job, Maura."

"You make me laugh." Maura continued as if she hadn't been interrupted. "You gave me a family, a place to belong, a home. You listened to me, and kept listening to me. You never wrote me off as insignificant like so many other people have. I was so lost, Jane. I had my dream career and I know I looked put together on the outside but I was incredibly lost. But you found me. You…" She paused unable to think of the right words to say. She got on her knees and grabbed Jane's chin kissing her fiercely. When she pulled away they were both breathless. She held onto Jane's face, keeping their mouths mere inches apart. "You are my best friend and far dumber than I thought if you don't know how important and attractive and kind and brave you are. I'm friends with you, I'm _dating _you, because you're so many wonderful, wonderful things and you care so much, about me, about your job, about your family. You care and it sets you apart. You don't break stuff, Jane, you find what's broken and put it back together. I don't think it matters _how _or _when _we got here. It just matters that we're here and we're in this together." She ended looking strongly into Jane's dark eyes.

Jane stared deeply into Maura's eyes finding nothing but affection and adoration in them. Unable to form words to make a reply she pulled Maura close until the honey-blond was sitting in her lap with her arms around Jane's neck. She draped one arm around Maura's back and the other over thighs before kissing her roughly. She tried to put everything she couldn't say into the embrace. When the need for air was too great they both pulled away resting their foreheads together breathing the same air. After a few minutes Maura removed her arms from Jane's neck and rested her head against the couch. Jane reached for the remote flipping to the game she wanted to watch.

Maura watched Jane watch the game. It was fascinating really the way Jane watched sports, the way she yelled at the TV or squeezed her thigh when something particularly exciting was happening. She never knew she would love just being in the same room as someone as much as she loved being with Jane. She was lost in the warmth of Jane's body and her thoughts that she didn't notice when Jane fell asleep mouth hanging open slightly. But when the recording ended she wondered why Jane wasn't changing the channel. She smiled softly before she kissed the sleeping Jane on the cheek and poked her in the ribs. "Honey?"

Jane cracked an eye open. "Did you just call me honey?"

Maura laughed lightly extracting herself from Jane's lap. "I did. Do you mind?"

Jane shook her head as she yawned. "You leaving?"

Maura nodded as she put her shoes on. "Thank you for talking to me." She said giving Jane a quick kiss.

"Thank you for making me." Jane said returning the kiss before standing to her feet. "I'll walk you out."

* * *

**A/N: **Thanks for reading!


	21. We Make Sense

**A/n: **Major fluff ahead. (Also, most of you said you wanted Maura to stay so...)

**Disclaimer: **Don't own characters. Not making money. ETC.

* * *

Jane cursed under her breath. With each step her irritation at herself only grew. She was alone in her apartment again. She could still feel the light weight of Maura's body resting on top of hers. Her lips still tasted like the peach flavored whatever Maura was wearing. She sighed. She wanted Maura back in her arms and that was so sappy and so stupid. It was all stupid, she was stupid. She should've told Maura more. She should've confessed to her what she confessed to her mother. She shouldn't have done what she did, which was fall asleep on the couch with her mouth hanging open after they got done making out. But she was so freakin' tired and Maura was there and she was just so darn comfortable and warm. The freaking out she'd been doing for the past two days, the buildup to actually leaving Maura's bed probably even longer, had worn her out emotionally and her job wore her down in all ways and all she wanted to do was sleep. She sighed again. She and Maura were actually on the same page and she always slept better with her than without her. She didn't ask Maura to stay and that was probably the stupidest thing of all.

She looked down at her feet where Jo Friday was sniffing the toes of her sneakers, her tail fully wagging behind her. "Jo Friday," Jane said playfully. Jo looked up, cocking her head to the side. Jane couldn't help but smile. "Do you need to go potty?" Jo spun in a circle before looking back up at Jane with a small yip. Jane laughed. "Well, hold on."

…

Maura was halfway to her house when she realized she left her cell phone at Jane's. As she turned back around, she reasoned that since her phone was so vital to her job that she definitely needed to go back and get it. And she thought since it was so late, and it would be even later if she went back home, that she could just stay the night with Jane, if the detective didn't mind of course.

Over the past few weeks they had spent more nights together than apart. Maura was getting used to Jane's presence in a bed they shared. She loved it, actually. There was something so nice and welcoming about having the lanky form of her best friend, her girlfriend, beside her. She loved the messy, dark curls that seemed to have a mind of their own, the sound of the soft even breath as Jane exhaled against her neck. She loved the idea that on those nights she knew without a doubt that Jane was by her side, that she was safe and secure and home. Maura let that last word settle in her mind as she drove.

Home was such a strong word. By definition it was a place where something originated from, where it was housed. It was a word that a simple dictionary definition couldn't quite emulate. It was one of those words that the idea, the practice of it was much greater than the actual word. Like love or bravery or fear or faith. Home could easily, and quite deservedly, belong with those words, because like those words it was also a feeling and feelings, at least in her experience, were much deeper (and harder to understand) than a dictionary definition. Home was about the picture that developed in the mind, it was what she thought of when she was away.

When she was younger home was a fairly large, mostly empty house. It was where she slept, ate her meals, did her homework, and studied. It was watching her mother paint in the den or watching her father work on his classic cars in the garage. It was always safe and she knew she was loved, but it was never filled with an all-encompassing warmth that she got with the Rizzoli's.

With Jane, home seemed so much more than any of those things combined. Maura loved her parents, she always would. They raised her when they didn't have to, they gave her clothing, food – anything she would've asked for. Only, she never knew how to ask. With her new version of home she didn't have to ask. Home was Angela Rizzoli butting into her life, her home, with food, a warm heart, and good intentions. It was Frankie and Tommy and Frost and Korsak. It was a warm meal, a shoulder to lean on, a place to relax and let her guard down. _Home is where the heart is, _the expression had never been laid out so clear for her until that moment. As much as she loved to travel she knew her heart would always be in Boston. And the sole purpose, the entire reason, she had this new definition was because of Jane. Jane was where she felt safest, who she could go to, where she could fall apart without judgment. Jane introduced her, dragged her in some cases, to her family, to gatherings, to drinks with the guys. And it was wonderful and she was eternally grateful and she wanted to thank Jane as soon as she possibly could.

Finally she pulled onto Jane's street and put her car in park. She walked into the apartment building and used her key to walk inside Jane's apartment. After relocking all of the locks Maura saw her phone sitting on the coffee table next to an empty beer bottle. She slipped off her heels, leaving them by the door. She put the empty bottle in the trash and picked up her phone before walking quietly down the hall to Jane's bedroom.

The detective was asleep lying on her right side with half her face shoved into a pillow. Maura smiled softly. She set her phone down on her nightstand before going towards Jane's drawer. She changed into a baggy faded Boston Police tee shirt and boxers she knew Jane loved to wear. Navigating through the dark she slipped her clothes onto a hanger and put Jane's discarded sweatpants into the hamper by her door. Finally, she crawled into the bed next to Jane.

Jane cracked an eye open when the bed dipped. "Am I dreaming?" She asked although she knew she wasn't. She smiled lazily as Maura lifted her left arm high enough so she could settle against Jane's chest. Maura leaned forward brushing her lips lightly against Jane's chin. "If I am don't wake me up."

"I forgot my cell phone." Maura tangled their legs together.

Jane shivered. "Your feet are cold."

Maura laughed quietly as Jane brought her closer. "You don't mind me staying?"

"Never." Jane yawned. "I was actually kicking myself for not offering." Maura smiled. Jane suddenly opened her eyes wide as the feeling of Maura's legs against her own. "I'm not wearing any pants."

"I noticed." Maura giggled. "If it makes you feel better, I'm not wearing a bra."

"Strangely, that doesn't make me feel better."

Maura moved her hand so it rested against Jane's heart. "You're not wearing a bra either."

"I thought I was the detective in this relationship?"

After a short moment of silence Maura spoke again. "Jane?"

"You keep talking and I'm gonna have to pretend to kick you out of the bed."

"Pretend?"

"Well, I'm comfortable. Actually kicking you out would just make me uncomfortable again."

Maura smiled although Jane couldn't see it. "You never told me what your mother said."

There was a long silence that followed her words. For a brief moment Maura thought Jane had fallen asleep in the middle of their conversation. But then Jane spoke, her words soft in the dark room. "She wants me happy." When Jane sighed Maura could feel it ripple through her entire body as if the tension Jane had been holding in over the past few days finally evaporated. "And you make me happy."

Maura could tell the second Jane fell asleep. Her whole body kind of went soft and her breath evened out. Maura brought one hand up gently stroking Jane's cheek. She kissed her lightly on the nose and smiled, before settling back down. "You make me happy too."

…

Maura woke up to an empty bed. She stretched lazily across the mattress and let her mind focus. She could hear Jane in the kitchen. She smiled remembering the night before, Jane's hot breath against her ear, how their legs intertwined together, and the way Jane's arm seemed to mold into her waist. She was glad she left her phone on the coffee table. She loved waking up in Jane's clothes with the scent of her wrapped around her. She stood with another stretch. One glance at the clock on the nightstand told her that it was still very early. At just after six they didn't have to be at work for a few hours. She yawned walking into the bathroom.

Jane stood in her kitchen as she mixed all of the ingredients together. Flour was everywhere, on her shirt, and her hands. She wouldn't have been surprised if it was all over her face with the amount of time she had to brush a stray strand of hair out of her line of sight. That was the primary reason she didn't like to cook. Even in her mid-thirties with her could-be-a-chef of a mother she still couldn't figure out how to do it properly without making a giant mess. But Maura was asleep in her bed and she woke up early for once and pancakes seemed like the best and only choice, really.

Jo Friday sat at her feet, diligently waiting for some food stuffs to land on the floor that Jane would inevitably drop at some point. "You know, I don't just cook for anyone, Jo." The dog scooted closer to Jane's feet at her words. She laughed. "And as I general rule cuddling is usually a no-no, I always feel suffocated. But I cook for her and sleep all over her." Jane shrugged as she poured the ingredients into the pan. "Maybe I just never had the right combination, huh? I break all my rules for her." She looked down at Jo who was looking at her with big brown eyes. "You know that lady you see me with all the time? The one with the yard and the turtle?" Jo barked. Jane grinned as she used the spatula to rearrange the pancake batter in the skillet. "We're more than friendly, if you get my drift." After a moment she flipped the pancake. "I don't think that's going to affect your little doggie life all that much, but I thought you should know." She flipped the pancake again before putting it on the plate with the others.

After brushing her teeth Maura walked into the hallway and leaned against the wall listening to Jane talk with a smile on her face.

Jane poured some more batter into the pan. "I really like her though, Jo. Like the kind of like that could lead to love if I don't find some way to screw it up. And it's weird!" Maura bit her lip to keep from laughing at Jane's outburst. "She said to stop worrying about that though, so did Ma. Ma's the one that tries to put you in frilly pink sweaters at Christmas." Jane added conspiratorially. Jo snorted. "My thoughts exactly." Jane flipped the pancake. "Maybe they're right though. But you know I'm a detective, you don't know what that is I know but it just means why's and when's are important to me." She sighed. "You want to know the truth though, don't you?" Jo cocked her head to the side. "Alright, don't twist my arm." Jane joked. "All I want to do is be with her, around her. I want to hold her and kiss her and talk to her. I want to get lost in all that is Maura Isles. Is that what love is, Jo?"

Maura couldn't take anymore. She walked up behind Jane and wrapped her arms around Jane's middle. Jane tensed before relaxing when she realized it was Maura, not that it could be anyone else. Her face ignited in a heavy blush at the thought that she probably heard what she was telling Jo. "You've made pancakes." Maura whispered in Jane's ear. Maura saw the slight goose bumps race across Jane's skin and the hair on the back of her neck stand up. She smiled.

"Some of them are turtle shaped." Jane pointed to the plate with a grin.

Maura looked at the plate with shining eyes. "I don't know, could be tortoises." Jane laughed and Maura more than any other moment wanted to say those dangerous three words. But it was too soon, and not the right time, and she wasn't ready to hear them much less say them, so instead she buried her face between Jane's shoulder blades and squeezed tighter.

Jane grabbed a dog treat from the bag and tossed it on the ground for Jo who ate it eagerly. "Are you going to come up front and tell me how much you heard me tell the dog?"

Maura shrugged. "I quite like the view back here." She took one hand from around Jane's waist and let it dance down Jane's back. She playfully pulled at the waistband of Jane's sweatpants. "You do have a beautifully proportioned gluteus maximus."

She felt more than heard Jane's laugh as she brought her hand back around. "You think I have a nice ass."

"I do." Maura laughed. They were silent for a moment just standing in the middle of Jane's kitchen before Maura spoke again. "That day you spent the night at my house because the plumbing in your building was getting worked on and you came to the bathroom to borrow some toothpaste that was when for me."

"Huh?"

Maura continued talking, speaking into Jane's shoulder. "You were wearing black slacks with your belt undone and a white tank top. You had that navy blue nail polish on your toenails and I remember thinking that you were very attractive in that moment. That was when it hit me. It might've been there all along or it might not have. I don't know, but after that moment I started to develop feelings for you that went deeper than friendship. That was when for me, if that helps you in anyway feel better about us – about this."

Jane sighed leaning back into Maura's touch before Maura let go. She watched Maura pick up the plate of pancakes and walk to the table before making two mugs of coffee. She was struck again by how gorgeous that woman was, with no makeup on, and full on bedhead wearing her clothes. There was just something striking about the fact that she was the only one that got to see Maura this way. "You know those clothes don't look half as good on me as they do on you."

Maura turned around facing Jane with a smirk. "Does that mean I get to keep them?" She looped her arms around Jane's neck.

"Hmm, I don't know." Jane murmured just as Maura brought their lips together in a slow, tantalizing kiss. All too soon, in Jane's opinion, Maura was out of her arms and walking back towards the table. Jane washed her hands off in the sink already knowing if Maura wanted the clothes she could have them. She dried her hands off with a towel and was about to sit back down at the table when Maura took the towel from her hands.

"I'm sorry, I can't take you seriously." She said quietly wiping at the flour that was across Jane's cheek.

"How long has that been bothering you?"

"Since I saw your face." They laughed before walking to the table and sitting down.

Jane passed Maura the syrup. "One of these days you're going to have to learn to let your hair down."

Maura looked perplexed. "My hair is down."

Jane smiled into her coffee cup. Suddenly she recalled Maura's words from weeks before any of it even happened. _It would be easy between us. _Initially she didn't take them seriously. She and Maura both were slightly inebriated that night but thinking of it now, so far they had rung true, but she had a vital question. "Will it always be like this?"

"Like what?"

"Easy. Smooth. Simple."

Maura smiled softly. "No."

Finally Jane looked at Maura with an eyebrow raised fork poised midair between plate and mouth. "Real vote of confidence you got there, Maura."

Maura looked knowingly at Jane. "We'll have bad days, maybe even bad weeks. There will be times that we won't want to talk to each other and we won't. We'll be grumpy, maybe from work or maybe it's just us. The newness will wear off eventually. But I," She bit her lip looking down at her plate. "I think we can make it."

"So do I." Their eyes met again and held. Jane smiled genuinely at her. "We never can stay away from each other long."

…

Jane got off the elevator with a cup of coffee in her hand. She raised her eyebrows at the sound of laughter coming from the bullpen before stepping into the room with trepidation. She noticed Greg Mathews sitting in her chair as he talked loudly, animatedly to Korsak and Frost and anyone who was listening. Upon seeing Jane, Frost coughed into his hand and went back to his desk. Greg spun around in her chair to face her. "Finally, Rizzoli. I was just telling the boys here –"

"Don't want to know." She interrupted. "Besides, I'm early." Jane kicked her chair pointing the one by her desk. "Get out of my chair."

He switched chairs. "You are not a morning person."

Jane scoffed. "I've actually been awake since six." Frost raised his eyebrows at her. She wanted to kick him.

"Why so early?" Greg teased.

"None of your damn business."

"Maybe you should have slept later."

"Maybe you should tell me why you're here and," She took in her desk. "Why you rearranged my entire desk." All of the things she had on the right side were on the left and vice versa. She already nearly knocked over her pen holder. She scowled.

He laughed as he pulled out a piece of paper from inside his coat. "Got the Touch Football schedule for you." She snatched the paper from him. She unfolded it and scanned the words. "As you can see, you're playin' the gang unit," He pointed to himself. "For the first game. So I gotta ask, do you want a handicap?"

Frost and Korsak looked at him like he had two heads. Jane scrunched up her face. "Excuse me?"

"Oh this'll be good." Frost mumbled under his breath.

"I mean 'cause you got the medical examiner on your team." Korsak out right laughed at that. Greg turned to him furrowing his eyebrows like he didn't know what he did wrong. "I know she's your friend and all but science dorks aren't the best with sports."

Jane raised an eyebrow choosing to ignore the _science dorks_ dig. "Maura's good with her hands."

"Know that from personal experience, do you Rizzoli?" He laughed.

Jane shoved him in the arm her cheeks flushed a slight red. She grabbed her wallet from the inside of her blazer and took a twenty out laying it flat on the table. "I bet you this twenty," She tapped the bill. "Homicide wins on Saturday."

Greg nodded pulling out his own wallet and throwing a twenty down. "I'll take that bet."

Jane narrowed her eyes yanking out another twenty. "Double or nothing, says Maura also scores a touchdown."

"Wait, so forty bucks if your M.E. scores a touchdown and homicide wins?"

"Yeah."

He threw another twenty down. "Deal." They shook on it.

Just as Greg was about to say something else the phones on all three of their desks started ringing. "Uh-oh."

Korsak answered his phone and the ringing stopped on Jane's and Frost's desks. Korsak nodded as he listened to the other person talk. He nodded once more before putting the phone back. "Our victim's wife has our main suspect at gun point in his apartment." He said gruffly before standing to his feet.

"Double uh-oh."

"Yup." Frost said standing to his feet.

Jane followed adjusting her gun. "Hey, if you want that coffee, it's yours." She pointed to the full cup. "And keep that money safe. And," She added one last time. "If you're going to stay here can you make sure when Frankie comes by to give him this address." She handed him a post-it that was previously sticking to her computer screen.

"How do you know he'll come by?"

Jane smirked. "He always comes by."

Sure enough Frankie did come by only Detective Mathews wasn't there but he left a sticky note that said FRANKIE in big letters and an arrow pointing to the address. Frankie laughed and rolled his eyes before picking up the address. He was supposed to pick up the team shirts from a custom shirt company for Jane.

…

Maura walked into her office after grabbing a cup of coffee and a bite to eat for lunch from the café. Upon her return she found a folded red tee shirt on her desk with a yellow post-it on top. She recognized the handwriting as Frankie's.

_I know if Jane was the one delivering this to you she'd probably write something really sappy, because when it comes to you she's the biggest sap there is. So to stick with the Rizzoli sappiness, I'm glad you're dating my sister. – Frankie R._

Maura smiled tucking the note into a drawer in her desk. She unfolded the shirt. It was very similar to the softball shirts the homicide team wore when they played. Boston Homicide was written in white on the front in big block letters with a gun in the middle. On the back she found her last name in the same font with the number two underneath it. She felt a warmth burst in her chest. It was a feeling almost always closely related to Jane. All her life her oddness led others to keep her at arm's length. But now she had a place to belong, friends to go to at the bar, people that waved her over, people that wanted her around. The smile remained on her face while she folded the shirt and sent Jane a text.

…

Meanwhile, halfway across Boston, Jane was having her own issues. She had no idea how she always got into these stupid situations. It must have been her 'act first – think later' attitude. She found herself standing in front of a quivering man and a severely shaking gun looking directly into the eyes of a grieving widow. She felt her phone vibrate on her side but forgot about it as soon as it happened. She could feel sweat dripping down her back. The man behind her had already started to sing like a canary. He said it was an accident, he was only meant to scare him. Jane had half a mind to turn around and ask how the hell a six inch knife wound up embedded in someone's chest by accident but she refrained. It was funny what people would say when I gun was pointed at their face.

"Sally," She tried again for what seemed the hundredth time. The woman's eyes flickered towards hers briefly. "Killing him isn't going to bring you or your family any peace."

But the woman wasn't having any of it. "He killed my husband!" Her voice cracked as a sob ripped through her vocal cords. "My children's father!" Her scream that time seemed to reverberate around the small apartment.

Jane swallowed hard. "Killing him is not going to bring your husband back."

"I know!"

"You love your kids, right?" Jane asked going for another angle.

"Of course I do." She seemed offended Jane would even ask such a question. She pulled the gun up higher. "That's why he has to pay!"

Jane almost wanted to move out of the way and let the woman destroy the man behind her. But there was a reason she was paid the big bucks, a reason she had the gold shield, so she asked the one question she knew would get her if the roles were reversed. "If you hurt him, who's going to take care of your kids?" The gun lowered a fraction of an inch. Frost inched closer. "If you hurt him, your kids are going to lose both of their parents at the same time. I _know _you don't want that." She gestured to the coffee table. "Just put the gun down, and we can work all of this out."

The second the gun was out of her hand Frost had her cuffed and Korsak picked up the gun. The apartment was resonating in her sobs as she hit her knees. Jane turned around shoving their guy into the wall and cuffed him. "You're under arrest for the murder of Jerry Davis. You have the right to remain silent…"

By the time they all made it back to the precinct it was well past lunch time, but their jobs were just getting started. Korsak took the woman into one interrogation room while Frost and Jane took the man. He was shouting for a lawyer the entire trip to the elevator. "You'll get your lawyer." Jane grumbled pressing the button for homicide floor a little too hard.

"Yeah, why don't you evoke your right to remain silent?" Frost quipped beside her.

The pair of them shoved the guy into the interrogation chair and left the room to wait it out for his lawyer. Jane felt her phone vibrate again just as she noticed her desk put back the way it should have been only with a purple Medical Examiner file on top and a plastic grocery bag full of red cloth in her chair. She picked up the bag and dug around before throwing Frost his shirt. "Team shirts for the game Saturday." She said as he looked at it. She threw Korsak's onto his desk.

"Nice!"

Jane picked up the file flipping through it. "Latent prints the crime techs found on the knife came back. Three guesses who they belong to."

"Our very own, Micky Cramer?"

"Winner, winner!" Jane laughed. She pulled her cell phone from her belt noticing both texts from Maura. The first one read: _Thank you for picking me for you team, I heard about the bet. Don't worry, I have very good hand eye coordination. Be safe! _Jane shook her head at the words a smile still plastered across her face as she read the next one. _Latent prints came back from the crime lab. Results are in the folder on your desk. You're more than welcome to come to my house when you're done if you like. Feel free to call if you have questions._ Jane slid her phone back into the place on her belt.

Frost laughed. "Man you got it bad."

"Shut up."

It was almost an hour before the lawyer came down to the precinct and even longer before all parties came to an agreement. The DA would come by the office tomorrow and talk to him, until then Mr. Cramer was most definitely spending the night (and many more after it) in a jail cell. Jane and Frost sat at their desks and began typing up their reports. They were halfway through when Korsak came up. He tossed his tie on his desk. "I don't know about you two, but I need a beer."

Frost stood with a stretch. "Me too." He turned to Jane. "What about you?"

She looked at the time, it was nearly eleven. "Nah, I'm just going to go home."

"Home home or Maura home?" Frost asked suggestively.

"Which would you choose?" She countered.

He shrugged. "Fair enough." Jane laughed and turned off her computer. Together the three of them got onto the elevators and headed down.

…

When Jane finally pulled into Maura's driveway it felt way later than it actually was. She was pretty sure the only thing keeping her legs moving was Jo Friday straining on the leash in front of her. Normally she probably would've just stayed home, but all she could see every time she closed her eyes were the saddest blue eyes she'd ever seen in her life, all she could hear was the woman's wails as Frost cuffed her. She sighed heavily, unlocking the door and walking in before locking it back. She turned on a lamp and threw her overnight bag onto the couch. After she was changed into her pajamas and Jo Friday was unleashed she traveled up the stairs slowly before walking into Maura's master bedroom. Lazily she pulled the covers down and slid face first into the pillow on her side of the bed.

Maura wrapped her arm around Jane. "Did Jo Friday have trouble sleeping again?"

Jane smiled, her thoughts about how shitty her job was momentarily stalled. She rolled into Maura's side, letting the other woman hold her. "Yes." She yawned.

Maura stroked her hair, stifling her own yawn. "Do you want to talk about it?"

Jane shook her head. She closed her eyes letting Maura's soft touch ease the tension from the day away. "You were wearing scrubs." She whispered as Maura's confession from that morning came back to her. She wanted Maura to know the moment it happened for her too. "When I first really, really felt it you were in the morgue teaching or something. You were wearing scrubs and then we got into an argument." She yawned. "I went to the bar and Korsak told me the reason I treated you differently than everyone else was because I had a crush on you. When I accepted it, it kind of made sense."

"_We_ make sense." Maura kissed the top of Jane's head. She moved her hand to Jane's back going slightly under her night shirt gently stroking nonsensical patterns against Jane's heated skin.

The detective shifted a moment underneath her touch. "Feels good."

Maura smiled lazily. "Go to sleep, Jane."

"Mmkay."

* * *

**A/N: **I mapped out the rest of the story and there's only going to be about 28-30 all together unless there's something specific y'all want to see?


	22. Surprises

**A/N: **It's two AM and I've only read through this whole thing once, forgive me for mistakes. I'll fix it later. Also, want to say that the rest of this story is going to be rated a strong T for adult situations.

**Disclaimer: **Don't own stufffff and definitely not making money.

* * *

_The crowd was what drew Maura's attention. Ever the scientist, ever the curious mind, she needed to know just what they were staring at. They were a faceless bunch of strangers, anonymous to her as they stood in a perfect circle around something that was just out of her line of sight. She made her way closer to the center, pushing her way through the people to get to whatever it was. There was a feeling somewhere in her mind, that whatever was in the middle might have needed her help. She briefly wondered if that strange feeling was what Jane had always referred to as her "gut"._ _As she pushed closer though, that thought was tossed out. There _was _someone in the center of the perfect circle, and that person most definitely needed her help. The closer she got a noise unlike any other stormed her eardrums and it only intensified with each step. She pushed further and fought harder because it was an eerily reminiscent sound, one she was sure she'd heard before. Finally, at the outer edge she stopped in her tracks. _

_Jane._

_A four letter word. One syllable. A name. And suddenly she was thrown spiraling into another dimension but Jane, Jane was still there only the crowd shrank and grew faces. She wanted the bigger anonymous crowd back. But she didn't have time to think. She was on her knees and her hands were covered in blood and Jane was making pathetic, pitiful sounds and the ambulance wasn't coming fast enough and she couldn't breathe. _

_She was a doctor and Jane was her best friend, her only friend, her home. And if she let Jane die how was she supposed to go on? How was she supposed to walk into her morgue and not remember every moment they ever spent together? How was she supposed to live in her house¸ sleep in her bed when the sheets smelled like Jane and every turn, every corner reminded her of the woman? _

_Desperately she looked into the crowd. Jane's family – her family – were all standing, sad solemn looks on each of their faces. Angela was clutching both of her son's shirts her face frozen in a sort of open mouthed shock and terror. _

_Frost and Korsak stood stoic and serious. And she screamed at them all to help her. She screamed and she yelled and the sidewalk was hot and the sun was bright and there was blood all over her hands. _

_Her eyes then landed on a different nightmare, one where she was much younger and less of the person she was in the present. There was the group of mean women from her medical school days who Maura was too shy, too intimidated to stand up to once again laughing at her inadequacy with live patients. But still, she would've accepted their help if it just meant the bleeding would stop. _

_In one heart stopping moment her eyes met her parents and their disappointed stares. They were always disappointed in her, disappointed that she ran off to Africa after an engagement that she never even wanted ended, disappointed when she chose pathology instead of something else, something prestigious like cardiothoracic surgery or neurology. Because who wanted their daughter to spend many of her living hours with the dead? But there was a reason! There was a reason her patients didn't bleed, a reason they didn't cough, or complain about pain, or need stitches. There was a reason they were dead by the time she got them. The pressure was too much, the stakes too high and _what if she did something wrong? _What if she screwed up? How was she supposed to live with that guilt? How was she supposed to get attached to someone and then lose them in an operating room? _

_But Jane, Jane was her patient. Jane was alive. And it was too much. Sirens and sun and pressure, so, so much pressure. The stakes were too high, she was attached but the blood on her hands wouldn't stop. No matter what she did Jane just kept bleeding. _

Maura jerked awake with a start breathing quickly. She reached blindly for her companion but there was no one there, it was nothing but empty space and endless sheets. For a short moment her frantic mind almost believed that her imagined world was true, that there was a grave stone somewhere in the world with 'Jane Clementine Rizzoli' written in the stone. She tossed her blanket to the side feeling far too constricted underneath them and flicked her bedside lamp on. She scrutinized her hands. They were clean but Jane's blood had been on them before. They had been in the same position as in her dream before. What if she was dreaming this whole time? What if Jane _was _in fact gone?

She knew on some level that it didn't make sense, that it didn't add up, that she was putting the puzzle pieces together face down without actually seeing the whole picture but she was tired and shaken and part of it had been real at one time and Jane was always dying on her so what if, what if the detective needed her help and she wasn't there?

…

"Rizzoli." Jane said gruffly into the phone. It was the middle of Friday night and she had been in a state of deep, deep sleep for a few hours. She wasn't on call that weekend, at all. But work had a tendency to call her sometimes regardless, whether or not her name was next on the list of "free" detectives. (Because detectives were never free, at least Jane wasn't. If she didn't have an immediate case to solve she was working on the small pile of open cases that were on the corner of her desk, or doing paperwork.) There was a sniffle on the other end of the line. Jane rubbed her eyes before taking the phone away from her ear to see who it was. _Maura _flashed on the screen in front of her eyes and she sat up in her bed already going to a standing position. "Maura? Are you…do you need…what's wrong? What happened?" The words weren't coming out fast enough as images, horrid, horrid images of break-ins and home invasions and robberies ran through her mind. Because why else would Maura call her at two AM crying?

Maura was standing in her kitchen still trying to catch her breath clutching her phone to her ear as if that would bring her closer to Jane. "Jane?" She spoke suddenly shy because Jane had told her that she didn't do 'sleepovers' before a big game. Maura had thought the term was a bit too childlike for what they had but considering everything in the bedroom had been less than PG she didn't say anything about it. Jane had said it was a superstition she had ever since she started playing organized, team sports. She had told Maura about a sleepover with some friends of hers before a big, travel field hockey tournament that led to her lucky sports bra being shoved into the freezer which left her in a funk the whole game. Her team had lost the big game and was sent packing. Maura tried to explain to Jane that luck wasn't a tangible thing, that it was only in the mind and her team likely lost because of something else entirely but Jane held steady.

"Yeah." Jane said breaking the silence, pressing the cool screen to her cheek as if that would eliminate all of the space between them.

"I know you said you don't do sleepovers the night before a game –"

"Yes."

…

By the time Maura got to Jane's apartment Jane was tiredly pacing back and forth. Her heart thudded loudly in her chest. She still had no idea what was going on but she'd already made the vow that if someone had laid one hand on even one strand of Maura's hair they were dead. The lock on the front door clicked and Maura rushed inside barely remembering to relock the door. Talking to Jane had eased her nerves but the drive had increased them to where they were when they woke up. It was irrational, she knew it was but she just couldn't help it and there was no one else to turn to. (Not that she would if there was.) "Maura, what…" Jane trailed off as Maura met her for a haste, bruising kiss and then she felt Maura's cold hands under her shirt.

It wasn't enough for Maura. The fact that Jane (her Jane) was standing and talking and breathing and radiating heat wasn't enough. No matter how many times she told her mind that it wasn't rational, that she was acting in an illogical manner she couldn't stop it. Because what if Jane was bleeding somewhere and she couldn't see it? She needed to feel Jane's heart beating with her own hands, but the stupid shirt, the stupid cloth wasn't cooperating with her and the longer she struggled the faster her heart beat, the harder it became to breathe. "I – I can't…I need…" She gave another pitiful tug on the item, eyes locking onto Jane's worried ones hoping she understood.

"You want it off?" Jane's mouth was suddenly dry. At Maura's frantic nod she pulled the bottom of her shirt over her head thanking God that she was chose to wear a sports bra to bed that night.

Maura's eyes quickly scanned Jane's smooth skin for any sign of trauma. There was no blood, no gaping holes. She let out a sigh of relief. She wrapped one arm tightly around Jane's waist and the other moved over Jane's heart. "You're alive." Maura whispered burrowing her head into Jane's shoulder. "You're alive."

At the words Jane finally understood what the hell was going on. She'd been in Maura's position before, multiple times, waking up in the dead of night with a nightmare on the forefront of her mind. So she pulled Maura closer to her whispering reassurances in her ear like Maura had done for her the many times Jane couldn't sleep through the night. But her body was not cooperating with her.

She felt a slight shiver run down her spine as Maura's hand traveled up her body ghosting over her bra before settling on her chest. She had to suppress a moan as Maura's soft hand dug into her exposed side forcing their bodies together. Because she was dating the woman in her arms and she was shirtless and it was her best friend and yes, she kept bringing it up but really it was a big freaking deal and god she wanted more. She wanted more and it infuriated her because she knew Maura was probably waiting on her to make that move because sex was always an issue with her. And she couldn't bring herself to make that move just yet. She wanted that next step, the last step, the terrifying step, to be special. No matter how sappy or old fashioned it sounded she wanted it to be in the wake of a good day not as a distraction from something bad.

But her body was not cooperating with her and for all intents and purposes Maura wasn't cooperating with her either because she was breathing on her neck and kissing her and her forearm was resting over her chest and it would've been too easy. Too easy to kiss her hard, too easy to bring Maura's top over her head, too easy to lead her to the bedroom, and then it would've been hard and she would've freaked out because she had no idea what to do and…she needed to do research or something so she didn't look like a teenage boy trying to figure it out for the first time.

Jane kept her arms around Maura's small frame, kept her close and kept whispering reassurances to her aliveness in between the soft kisses until she felt Maura finally relax into her body and her grip lessoned just slightly.

…

Maura squinted her eyes at the sunlight creeping into the room. She yawned letting herself absorb in her surroundings. She was in Jane's room, in Jane's bed. Her body was pressed softly into Jane's body held there by gravity, one lean arm, and an ankle hooked around hers. With every small puff of air hitting the top of her head and with every rise and fall of the chest beneath her the events of the night before and how she got into the bed she was currently residing wandered back to her.

She had no idea why the nightmare came that night of all the nights, no idea why it was that particular one or why all those seemingly random people showed up. She wasn't overly stressed or in the middle of a particularly gruesome case. It had been a while since she or Jane or the both of them had been in a life threatening situation. She had no idea, the human mind was still such a mystery that she didn't think she'd ever know. Psychology was peculiar that way. But the dream did have an element of reality to it. Further proof came when her elbow brushed against an almost long forgotten scar.

It always amazed her that Frankie and Jane both made it out of the entire situation alive, a little worse for wear but they were both alive. Given the choice worse for wear was much better than dead. She could still remember running towards the front of the building after SWAT took Frankie to the ambulance. If she thought about it hard enough she could still picture it clearly in her mind: Jane forcing the gun to her side, her scream, the sound of the gunshot echoing throughout the streets of Boston, and how the world seemed to slow, to stop, when Jane hit the concrete barely moving.

After that, listening to Jane breathe had become a habit. Many nights, for weeks, were spent in the hospital at either Jane's bed or in the waiting room. She had translated everything the doctors had said in the simplest terms she could manage for Angela and Frank. When the doctor came back again saying they could go back to see Jane, Angela had grabbed her hand and pulled her with her. At first she resisted because it was family only. But then Angela gave her that look, that was so similar to the one Jane always gave her when she said something strange and then she started crying. It was more like a hard sobbing and the Rizzoli woman took her into her arms and told her she _was _family. Maura had never felt so much all at once and Angela somehow became her anchor in that one defining moment.

It was a deal that Maura could stay with Jane whenever and however long she wanted. It made it easier on Jane's parents so they could visit with Frankie and not worry whether or not Jane was alone. It also gave Maura a comfort that she so desperately needed. In those few days in that small hospital room she developed the habit of watching each inhale and exhale going through Jane's body. It started from that first night hooked up to the respirator and continued on through the present. It was comforting knowing that Jane was breathing because if she was breathing then she was still alive.

She had no idea that when she became friends with Jane she would travel on the biggest waves and crashes of emotions in her entire life. It was like a never ending rollercoaster and the best thing was that she never wanted to get off, she wouldn't trade it for anything.

Her eyes locked onto Jane's face. The sun was cascading in such a way onto her features Maura wished she had a camera to capture the moment. All of her thoughts about blood and sidewalks and concrete faded as she gazed.

Jane was a truly beautiful woman, it always amazed her how she managed to stay single. _I'm horrible to be in a relationship with. _Jane had said those words to her in a confession standing on her doorstep three weeks ago, but so far she hadn't seen any of that horribleness. It would in all likelihood come one day, but so far it was a nonexistent problem. Jane's weaknesses were her strengths and vice versa, they worked so well together. She was happy that Jane was hers. A small smile spread across her face as the thought sank in. Jane was hers. Lightly she brushed her lips against the side of Jane's jaw. Gently she traced a finger lightly over Jane's cheek.

Jane scrunched her nose and rolled over onto her stomach inadvertently falling on top of Maura. She stuffed her face into the pillow facing away from Maura. "No face touching."

Maura laughed poking Jane in the ribs. "What about other touching?"

Jane growled into the pillow. Maura needed to not talk like that while they were lying in bed together while she was without a shirt. She yawned blinking trying to wake herself up. Jane reached an arm over Maura grabbing the blanket that strayed to the side of the bed in the night. She brought it over them, over their heads. She jumped when Maura placed a cool hand against her side. "You think you're funny." Jane mumbled nuzzling into Maura's neck. The other woman's hands continued to dance up and down Jane's back lightly skirting her flimsy sports bra. "You're going to have to stop doing that."

Maura grinned wickedly. "Why don't you make me?" She whispered into Jane's ear.

Jane quirked an eyebrow before bringing her face level with Maura's and crushing their lips together in a heated kiss, morning breath be damned. One hand tangled in Maura's hair and the other rested against Maura's hip.

Needless to say they had a late start for breakfast.

…

By midafternoon Jane was dressed in her football uniform complete with knee high black socks and a red bandanna tied around her head. She was eating a banana sitting on Maura's kitchen counter swinging her legs back and forth waiting for the other woman to come back down the stairs. She glanced at her watch. If Maura didn't hurry her ass up they were going to be late. "Is she always like this?" Bass craned his neck to see her giving her what she would like to assume as a knowing look because yes, Maura was always like that.

"Like what?"

"You need to stop barging in on me talking to the pets." Jane said taking a final bite of the banana. She turned towards Maura and glared upon noticing her attire. "Maura."

"Maybe you should stop talking to them then." She looked down at her running tights innocently. "What?"

"Shorts, Maura. Where are your shorts? We discussed this already." Jane crossed her arms.

"But I'm going to be running and I don't like the shorts." Maura reasoned.

"Team sport, Maura. Emphasis on team. Team uniform." Jane hopped down from the bar. "And quite frankly I'd rather not see Korsak in a pair of those." She pointed to Maura's legs.

"I wouldn't mind seeing _you_ in a pair." Maura whispered coyly leaning into Jane.

"We've also had this conversation before." She pulled away from Maura and walked behind her. "Maybe I just don't want anyone else ogling your ass besides me?" She whispered into her companion's ear. She let go and tapped Maura on the ass. "Now go change or we're going to be late."

"We have two hours before the game starts."

"Yeah, and I want to survey the field and teach you a few pointers about catching."

…

Jane stood in front of Maura trying to keep the stupid goofy grin off her stupid face. She was failing, so, so badly at it too. It was just that Maura, her favorite person (that was what she had decided she was going to call Maura from then on because for one she _was _her favorite person and for two girlfriend and best friend didn't feel quite _enough_) was standing in front of her with that look she always got when she was looking at a particularly intriguing piece of evidence as she explained the details of catching a football. The knee high black socks, the red bandanna around her head, the almost out of place looking shorts and the pigtails (especially the pigtails) created an entire ensemble that Jane hadn't expected that was both completely adorable and strangely attractive.

"Jane!" Jane jumped. Maura sighed in mild irritation. "If we lose the game, I will not be held responsible."

Jane just smiled and slung her arm around Maura's shoulders. "We're not going to lose."

"You don't know that." Maura crossed her arms.

Jane laughed. "Sure I do."

"It's scientifically impossible to predict the future, Jane. The outcome of this game could very well not end in our favor."

"You," Jane squeezed Maura's shoulder. "Need to have some faith."

Maura rolled her eyes. "Faith has nothing to do with sports or…whatever this is we're playing."

Jane gasped clutching her heart in mock shock. "Faith has everything to do with sports! It's all about the power of believing that your team is the better team no matter the odds. Just because the odds are against you doesn't mean it can't be done. Believing in yourself, in your team, when no one else does – that takes faith." At Maura's silence, Jane kept talking. "But you are already thinking that my team has the odds against them and I will tell you we are definitely not the weak team here."

"We're not?"

"Nope."

"I'm on your team." Maura said finally voicing the thought she'd been carrying around for the last two days. The thing about being a somewhat quiet person around the people she didn't know was that she overheard a lot of things. She could remember since the schedule came out how detectives would talk in line about how homicide was going to lose because they had her on the team, the medical examiner whom they had never seen without high heels on, the basement dweller that was far too weird and far too elegant to be playing a boy's game in the dirt at the park.

"That's why we're going to win." Jane whispered into Maura's ear. "Now, turn that frown upside down, because we got a game to play." Maura finally uncrossed her arms and even found the corners of her lips twitch upwards.

…

They won the game and Maura scored a touchdown. It was actually really funny when Jane thought about it. The gang unit had strutted up to the field all full of themselves and that, Jane decided, was their ultimate downfall. The look on Greg's face as he handed her a wad of cash was well worth spending her day off in a park full of sweaty guys and the long, slow kiss Maura gave her when they both got into the car was well worth the sweat rolling into her eyes and the mud on her shoes and just about every other complaint she could even come up with.

Five minutes before the game was supposed to start the five guys of the Greg's gang unit team sauntered up to the makeshift field in their matching blue t-shirts. Some of their wives and children set up camp on the sidelines along with a couple of the detectives from the drug unit, one of which became their impromptu referee. The rules were restated for everyone: No tackling, no purposefully shoving someone to make them fall, there were no first downs (the teams had four chances to make the touchdown before having to switch to defense), only two handed touches counted, and the first team to give touchdowns or points won the game. One coin toss later and homicide found themselves on the defensive side.

Greg didn't get a point until the fourth try. Which Jane thought was pretty good since really, it was just she, Frankie, and Frost doing most of the leg work. They went back and forth for a while after that. Homicide was just barely hanging onto the lead at four with the gang unit at three. Jane exchanged a few whispered words with Korsak and Maura before getting back into position. Jane was getting tired of playing and she really wanted to end the game. All game she noticed how no one from the other team really guarded Maura all that well. The person who was supposed to do it kept deviating and covering Frankie instead. Jane thought it was about time that Greg paid for that mistake.

Korsak hiked the ball and faked a pass to Frankie, which the detective who was supposed to be covering Maura bought. After the fake Korsak let the ball loose in a hearty throw in Maura's direction. For a split second Jane thought the ball was too high, that it had too much _oomph _to it and that Maura wasn't going to be able to catch it. But, just like everything, Maura used her knowledge of time and space and math to speed her run up just a hare. Much to many of the player's amazement the medical examiner jumped a few inches off the ground catching the ball securely in her hands as she landed safely with both feet on the ground. She pulled the ball close to her side like Jane had taught her and sprinted in the direction of the two trees that represented the goal line.

Jane didn't know if Maura was just that fast or if the gang unit guys were just too stunned and really that slow. But either way, Maura was just a few feet from the goal line and Greg was the closest to her but even he couldn't catch her. Maura was in a full on zone as she raced. Playing in the park in a sort of team sport was never an event she got to participate in as a kid or even a young adult. As she ran, as a few detectives clapped, and as Frankie yelled from somewhere behind her 'go Maura' she found herself smiling as she crossed the touchdown mark and the whistle blew signaling the ending of the game.

Jane was the first to greet Maura, having run past Frankie and Frost and the entirely stunned gang unit detectives. She wrapped her arms around Maura's waist and lifted her into the air and spun around in a circle. Maura laughed and the sound was like music to Jane's ears. Korsak was laughing behind them and Frost and Frankie were patting each other on the back and shaking hands with the other team. Jane finally set Maura back on the ground. "That was amazing!" She kissed the top of Maura's head and slung her arm around her shoulders.

"I had a good teacher." Maura smiled.

Greg walked up to them with significantly less of a swagger in his stride. Jane turned to face him leaving her arm where it was. Greg pulled out a wad of cash from his pocket. "Eighty bucks your majesty." He said with a bow. Jane snatched the money from his hand as his gaze landed on Maura's. "I'm sorry for underestimating you."

"Careful you might strain a muscle." Jane joked punching him lightly on the arm.

He rubbed the area with a pout. "Your girlfriend throws a mean punch." He directed towards Maura. He'd known for a while the two were dating, it was a rumor that no one seemed to want to step up and ask. So he thought why not do it then?

"Don't worry Detective Mathews, it probably won't bruise."

"Besides, I'm sure you can find a nice woman at The Robber who would kiss it to make it feel all better." Jane interjected shoving him again.

"Ah," He dodged Jane's arm. "So, you two finally dating or what? Inquiring minds want to know."

Strangely Jane didn't feel weird about the question. She thought she would, she thought maybe her friends and colleagues would've treated her differently because of it but Greg was talking with her like she always had and Frost hadn't said a mean word about it. Instead of retracting her arm and going on the defensive like she knew she would've done had her arm been slung around someone else, she raised a single eyebrow at Greg. "Wouldn't you like to know?" She said just as Maura wrapped an arm around her waist and they walked back to the car.

…

Jane had no idea who started it or how it even managed to happen. She had driven them back to Maura's house. The second the car was put in park they were kissing and it wasn't long before Maura was climbing across the seat to make herself home on Jane's lap. Jane couldn't think straight (or sideways or slanted or crooked or at all.)

Maura's mouth was hot against hers, her body pressed as close as possible while confined to the car. Jane just let her hands rest on Maura's hips while Maura chose to let hers wander all over Jane's torso. Maura took be bottom lip between her teeth nipping it slightly before their tongues met. Shortly thereafter the car was filled with heavy breathing through noses and the soft groans and moans coming from the both of them. It was in those moments Jane realized she could get lost, get found, dive in and drown in just a kiss from Maura. Maura was a really good kisser and judging by what she was getting in return Jane had to assume she wasn't too bad at it either.

It wasn't clear who did it or which body part it was but someone shifted and all of a sudden there was a very loud, very startling beep that made them both jump and wrench their mouths away from each other. They stared at each other wide eyed in shock for a second or two before they both burst into a fit of laughter.

"Perhaps we should take this inside the house." Maura suggested as she opened the door and crawled out of the vehicle.

Jane brain was like a keyboard that someone had poured water all over and everything was short circuited. She tried to get out of the car while still wearing her seatbelt she was such a mess. Finally, though she managed to extricate herself from the car and joined Maura on the porch.

"That was so much fun!" Maura gushed as she unlocked her front door.

Jane wasn't sure if she was talking about the game or what they were just doing in the car, either way she had to agree. "I'm glad you enjoyed yourself." She said slowly after a moment as she finally came out of the Maura induced stupor.

Maura opened the door that smile – the one that showed off her dimples and the twinkle in her eye that Jane loved to see – plastered on her face. "Are you coming in?"

Jane slowly felt her smile drop as the seconds ticked by. There was something else in that smile, something she hadn't noticed before, something that made the green part of Maura's eyes a little darker. Could it have been desire? Lust? Want? A combination of the three? Her gut was telling her that if she followed Maura into the house things would get a little more complicated. She was sure her face was mirroring those things and more and she knew if Maura kissed her again like they had been doing in the car she wouldn't be able to help herself. Her body was already humming with a need she couldn't go there, not yet.

It wasn't that she wasn't ready, because she was, she definitely was, but she just didn't want to look like an idiot. Maura had once told her she never told a guy he was good in bed when he wasn't and what if Maura was that frank with her? What if they got to the bedroom, got naked and she couldn't figure it out? _Teenage boy, _her brain seemed to tell her, _teenage boy. _It was the same thought she'd had the night before and the same thing that was stopping her now. needed to do some research. She needed to get some background information, form a plan, make a strategy, anything along those lines really. She took a step back trying to ignore the hurt on Maura's face. "Jo Friday," She said. "I need to feed her and take her for a walk." She took one more step. "I'll see you tomorrow at family dinner, though."

…

Jane didn't know how long she sat on her couch with her computer open on her lap. The Google homepage was staring at her, mocking her in a sense, because she couldn't even type it out. She couldn't even think about it without blushing. Sex was a three letter word but it always sent her running.

It wasn't that she never had sex, it didn't happen often but it _did _happen from time to time, it was the fact that it was sex with a woman, sex with Maura that was screwing with her mind. And her face already felt like it was on fire. She shifted her eyes nervously around the room as if someone might have been watching her instead of just the dog.

She sighed. She wanted to go there with Maura, she really did, but she had no idea what the hell she was supposed to do. She got the 'L' down in the search bar before slamming the laptop shut and getting to her feet. In the end she wound up slouched on the couch, a cold beer in her hand as she watched a marathon of COPS.

…

Maura was more than a little disappointed after Jane had left. She felt a light blush across her face as she remembered the heated moment shared in the car, the moment in Jane's bed that morning, and each and every time Jane has whispered something directly into her ear in that ungodly voice of hers. Come Sunday they would have been dating for three weeks. That was by far the longest amount of time she'd gone without while in a steady adult relationship and it was starting to wear on her a bit. Ever since that morning when she'd woken up on top of a shirtless Jane she wanted to know, now more than ever, what it would feel like waking up next to Jane without the clothing barrier. She wanted to see Jane's thick, curly, hair tangled from sex. She wanted to hear Jane's voice in the throes of passion, wanted to see her arch into her touch, and wanted to see her fall apart in her arms. Not only did she want to see and experience those things she wanted to memorized every single detail about them, about Jane's body, where the detective squirmed under her touch, her gaze. She wanted all of Jane.

Maura shifted on the couch. She needed to stop thinking. She grabbed the medical journal that was resting on her coffee table, flipped it open, and began reading.

She was so absorbed in the words on the page that she didn't notice when the sun started to go down outside. Bass had worked his way all the way from the kitchen to the living room so that he sat next to the couch and at her side. As she was turning the page to start another chapter the doorbell rang. Maura furrowed her eyebrows. Jane usually knocked and then walked in or just used her key. "I wonder who that could be."

She stood slowly making her way to the door with a small stretch. When the door opened her breath caught in her throat. She swallowed hard. "Mother?"

"Hello, darling!" Her mother smiled lovingly at her looking much better than she had the last time she saw her.

Maura blinked and squinted her eyes at the man who stood behind her mother. "Daddy?"

He grinned that same familiar grin he would always shoot her across the dinner table on the rare moments he made it on time to eat with her. "Hello, pumpkin!"

* * *

**A/N: **Yeah, I don't know how that got so long either and hey look! A cliffhanger! I did want to thank everyone who has reviewed and alerted and favorited though because another milestone was hit in the space between last update and this one. Over 300 people have this story alerted and over 100 have if favorited! (Which is insane!)

Thanks for reading/everything!


	23. Shopping and Family

**A/N:** A lot of y'all told me I needed to write faster (lol) so I took that to heart and have been doing nothing but this story and school for the last two days. I've officially broken 100,000 words though! Longest story I've ever written, thanks for sticking around through the obnoxiously long ones!

**Disclaimer: **Don't own. No money. Etc.

* * *

Maura stared at her bedroom ceiling. Her parents had just left for the hotel and she was in complete darkness on top of her still made bed. She hoped that her body would've relaxed from the sheer act of lying on the mattress, that the twisting of a ring that was no longer on her finger and the fidgeting of her fingers would've stopped. But it hadn't. She was still fidgeting and worse still there was an annoying, nagging voice telling her how much she needed to clean that wouldn't go away.

She knew she needed to sleep. Her body was tired, weary from the football game. Her mind was tired from thinking, from always seeming to be _almost_ there with Jane but never quite reaching there, and the reading she had done earlier wasn't light by any means. No matter how hard she tried to force herself into some level of unconsciousness her mind wouldn't let her go. It was racing as she vividly pictured each particle of dust that made home on all of the picture frames and paintings throughout her house. She could easily image each item that was out of place. Like the book she'd been reading on her coffee table, the neatly stacked papers on her desk that she should put away, Jo Friday had run around the house, and she needed to vacuum. She needed to clean because her parents…her parents were in Boston.

Her father, she discovered, was asked at the last minute to be a guest speaker at BCU after the original guest speaker unexpectedly cancelled. He was asked on Friday night and the speech was meant to be on Monday. They explained to her (not that she'd asked for an explanation, though it was appreciated) that between the packing and the last minute travel arrangements there was just no time to call her in advance. They would've waited to come to her house but the hotel was just on the way and they wanted to stop in and ask her if she wanted to go for breakfast in the morning where they were staying. But then Maura and her over analytical, overthinking, overgenerous, stupid mouth jumped in all eager to please and fully mannered, offering her guest room. (Not the house, because she felt like the house was now Angela's and she wasn't going to kick Angela out of her home to stay with Jane. She wasn't going to put that on either of them.) And they agreed! They weren't supposed to agree, they never agreed, but they did and she was thrown through an unexpected loop and what had Jane said to her mother to cause all of these strange changes?

They did however need to go to the hotel that night because they were meeting with the event coordinator from the university and because it was going to be late by the time they finished with the meeting and the room was already paid for. But after that they were going to be staying with her for three nights and four days. All of that time, those hours spent under the same roof, eating the same meals (if they didn't go out.) Since they were going to be staying with her Maura decided to skip breakfast with them and instead have dinner for them at her house. Maura felt her eyes grow wide as she realized tomorrow was Sunday. Sunday which meant Rizzoli family dinner which meant she had inadvertently invited her parents to the dinner which meant Jane was going to meet her parents. _Oh, _Maura thought. It was more of a squeak of a thought, but how on earth was she going to tell her parents she was dating Jane? The last time her mother had heard the pair was still not speaking to each other, they were both still so angry in the shadow of bullets and boyfriends and FBI agents and mob boss fathers and dirty cops.

With each thought her eyes grew wider, her heart beat faster and her imagination ran rampant. Unable to force herself to lie in bed any longer she pulled herself off of the bed, changed her clothes, and raced back downstairs. She had so much to do and so little time.

…

Jane stood in the doorway to the guest bathroom. A small smile played on her lips as she watched Maura. The woman was on her hands and knees in the shower. She was scrubbing the space between the tiles with a toothbrush and what smelled like bleach. She was working so hard Jane could see a bead of sweat about to drip from the tip of her nose before Maura wiped it away with her wrist. Jane would've thought it was incredibly, endearingly, cute had it not been for her mother's harried phone call to her an hour ago and the fact that Maura's posture was incredibly tense. She stepped into the room finally deciding to intervene.

"My mother called." Jane drawled leaning against the counter. Maura's scrubbing paused for a brief moment before beginning furiously again. "She said, and I quote: Janie, you need to get over here and calm your girlfriend down before she gives herself a coronary." Jane's grin grew wider at Maura's indignant huff. Jane cut in again though before Maura could lecture her on the likelihood of her actually _having _a coronary. "Apparently, your parents are in town, they're staying with you, and they're coming to family dinner tonight." Jane ticked each item off on her fingers. "Oh, I forgot the best part!" Jane laughed. "My mother, _my mother, _the queen of overreactions, the queen of self-made stress, actually banned you from your own kitchen because _you _were stressing _her _out."

Maura scowled as she continued her scrubbing. "I'm glad you find this all so very amusing."

"I guess it's different when it's _your _parents barging in, huh?"

Maura say back on her heels and finally looked at Jane. "My parents don't do barging in or…or unannounced anything! We plan. We make appointments, talk to secretaries. Things run on a schedule. They aren't supposed to just pop up unannounced whenever they want to! They broke the rules! What if I had someone over? What if we were indisposed? What then?" Jane's eyebrows shot up to her hairline and her cheeks tinged a light pink knowing full well that she would've been the someone and they could've ended up like that had she not left. "Who do they think they are?" Maura finished dropping her hands to her sides and looking at Jane with a pout. Jane couldn't help but laugh. "It's not funny." Maura pointed the toothbrush at her.

"It is a little bit." Jane responded. Upon seeing her chance Jane snatched the toothbrush out of Maura's hand.

Maura scurried to her feet. "Give that back, I'm not finished!"

Jane laughed as Maura made grabby hands at the object. "I don't think I will." She taunted as she held it above her head, which was way above Maura's. There were some definite perks to dating and being friends with shorter people.

"But I need to clean!"

Jane stuck the toothbrush in her back pocket. "You've been cleaning all morning, and probably even all night."

"I'm not afraid to go back there." Maura threatened pointing to Jane's behind.

Jane smirked arrogantly. "Try me."

And then Maura did. Which was a huge mistake considering Jane actually _was _the detective in their relationship and therefore legitimately trained in using her body as a weapon. Maura was a medical examiner and although Jane had trained her on the intricacies of self-defense there had yet to be a lesson on offense, because it simply wasn't needed. With those factors, coupled with Jane's positioning with her back to the counter there was absolutely no way Maura was going to get the toothbrush back.

Maura's act of attack was to just launch herself full bodily at Jane in a way that made Jane truly question if she should actually teach her some sort of offensive moves because if that was Maura's plan of attack, she was in trouble. But the reckless move did allow Jane to get Maura out of the guest bathroom. As Maura reached around her with one hand and pressed the other against her abdomen Jane took a clumsy step forward, dropped her knees a little, wrapped an arm around Maura's waist and lifted her on top of her shoulder.

The second Maura's feet left the ground, Jane heard her squeal and felt her clutch her shirt with a grip of steel. "You put me down this instant, Jane Clementine Rizzoli!"

Jane's jaw dropped. "Did you _really _pull the middle name card, Dorthea?"

"Yes, I think I did. Now, put me down. My parents are going to be here in –"

"Ten hours, I know." Jane finished for her. She shut off the guest bathroom light as they exited. "I know that, because you repeated that to my mother since seven this morning." They walked by the kitchen. Jane gave her mother a curt nod as if she were tipping the brim of an imaginary hat, like carrying a squirming Maura Isles on her shoulder was a regular occurrence. And Angela didn't even say a word. Jane was fully expecting a lecture about rough housing and acting like a lady or some decent versus indecent behavior talk but none came. Jane burst into another fit of laughter because her mother never passed up on the chance to give her a good lecture about her life choices. Maura must have been really worked up, she surmised, to make her mother willfully ignore the rough housing style behavior.

Maura stopped squirming as Jane's foot hit the first stair. "What is it that you find so funny, Jane?"

Jane smiled as she continued to climb up the stairs. "Nothing, Maura, nothing at all."

Maura narrowed her eyes. "Maybe I'm not going to kiss you until you tell me?"

"Maybe I don't want to kiss you." Jane countered.

Maura's jaw dropped. "You do know I'm in perfect position to give you a wedgie or to snap your bra right?"

"I'm surprised you even know what those things are, much less how to do them." Jane opened the door to Maura's bedroom. She dropped Maura onto the bed and left her body lying half on top of her. "I bet you cave with the kissing thing first."

Maura gave Jane a leveling look. Jane's face was so close to hers she could still smell the minty scent from Jane's toothpaste and Jane could smell the coffee off of Maura's breath. Maura leaned in just a fraction so their lips were barely a breath apart. "You're on, detective."

Jane felt something shoot up her spine at Maura's words. She felt herself leaning in to Maura she found the willpower to stand up and away from Maura. "You, Dr. Isles, are going to take a shower and then we are going shopping because I'm in court all week and I need a new suit and because I did make a deal with you that we could go shopping together."

"But my parents…"

"Are going to be here in ten hours, my mother is cooking dinner and you've been banished from helping her, and your house is spotless." She gave Maura a stern look before shrugging her shoulders. "Hey, either way I need a new suit. So you either go with me and pick me out something presentable _or _I go by myself. You never know I could come back with one of those packaged shirt deals where you get three in a package, maybe even buy some socks to wear with a new pair of crocs." She shrugged again. "You just never know what I'll come home with when I'm let loose in a store all by myself."

And really how was Maura supposed to say no after a threat against fashion like that?

…

Jane stood in the middle of a store she'd only been to twice before with Maura at a complete loss. It was a woman's only clothing store, dresses were on one side and suits on the other, everything else was kind of in between. The woman standing at her side was clearly lost in thought and Jane felt her stomach twist in disappointment. She didn't exactly know who she was disappointed with exactly but the feeling was totally there. She thought a little retail therapy would've done Maura some good. The doctor always shopped and bought things (sometimes ridiculous, outrageous things) when she was feeling particularly stressed. But all she was really doing was standing in the middle of a pricey clothing store near comatose. Jane was about to pull Maura back to the car when Maura took a decisive step forward.

A few minutes later Jane was being shoved into a dressing room with one outfit in her hands. She looked at the clothes and instantly knew Maura was definitely out of it. One of the items was something of a floor length denim-ish – or was it corduroy? – skirt and the top was a…well she wasn't exactly sure. She didn't even know if she knew how to put it on. All she knew was that it was brown, the ugly kind of brown at that, and it kind of looked like a poncho. All of her protests against the garments fell upon unhearing ears as Maura unceremoniously shoved her into the dressing room. Jane kicked off her shoes hoping that if Maura actually saw what she handed Jane then maybe she would snap out of her little mood.

Maura sat on a chair just outside Jane's fitting room door. Her mind was finally in the present as she let the familiar sense of shopping fill her. She couldn't even recall what she had given Jane to try on. She ran a tired hand over her face. It seemed to just hit her that she hadn't been to sleep yet. She was definitely due another cup of coffee. She yawned. Probably more than one cup. Finally the door opened. Maura shot out of her seat as if it was on fire. She grabbed Jane's arm forcefully pulling her back into the small room, lest anyone actually see her like that. "What the hell are you wearing?" She hissed. "I thought the purpose of me coming with you was to help you avoid fashion faux paws."

Jane laughed holding her hands up in surrender. "You picked it out!"

Maura looked horrified. "I did not!"

"Oh, you so did!"

Maura gave her a withering look. "Change. Now."

Jane grinned. "Okay, Bossypants."

A few minutes later the offending garments were put away and Jane was back in her t-shirt and jeans. The best thing about having Maura shop for Jane was that she just directed her around the store. Maura hardly ever asked for her opinion, she just seemed to know what Jane would and would not wear and she usually respected that boundary. Which was a completely one-eighty from her mother who like to shove dress after dress into her arms along with stupid colors like pink and all of its living affiliates. But there was also something else about shopping with Maura that she was never able to fully appreciate before.

There was something undoubtedly sexy about the way Maura walked around the store. There was something in the way her eyes narrowed as her fingers trailed over a pattern or how she hummed when she saw something she liked. Or how she held up a shirt to Jane's body scrutinizing the color with sharp hazel eyes and how she walked around the store like she was in complete and total control. It was very authoritative and no nonsense and Jane found it incredibly hot and it didn't even bother her anymore that Maura could turn her on so easily. That was the magic of Maura Isles, she guessed. In the end, Jane found herself following the doctor around the store like a puppy afraid to get left behind.

…

"I'm not buying it, Maura." Jane defiantly crossed her arms.

"Why not, Jane?" Maura stood behind the detective in the dressing room Jane was vacating. She took a step forward letting her eyes travel over Jane's back. The suit was a nice fit, the pants could've used some slight altering so they were just a tad longer but otherwise it was perfect. It showcased all of her detective's best assets and it was well within a price she knew Jane would find acceptable for such a nice, high caliber suit.

"It's too nice."

Maura blinked in surprise. She usually got 'too expensive, too many ruffles, too bright, too dark, too much.' There was usually a slew of excuses, but too nice? She could work with too nice. She came to stand in front of Jane in the small space between her and the mirror. The crisp white button down top contrasted beautifully against Jane's olive skin tone and the cut of the blazer really showed off Jane's slim waist. She fingered the collar of the shirt, her eyes met Jane's. "Of course it's nice, you do know where we are don't you?"

Jane swallowed hard. The scent of Maura's perfume combined with her shampoo was intoxicating on its own but having her so close, in all of her personal space with her fingers purposefully grazing her neck almost made her want to close the minimal space between them. She half-wanted to push Maura against the wall and kiss her but the game they were playing was still going on and she'd be damned if she lost that early. "Where am I going to wear it? Besides court."

Maura let her hands fall down Jane's front smirking at Jane's tense muscles and the hitch in her breath. Maura knew she had sex appeal, a lot of it, it was easy to know that with the amount of times she'd been hit on by random men in bars, but knowing that she could cause that same reaction in Jane was something entirely different. Jane was always stepping forward and then stepping back, it was confusing, so she found a strange thrill at the times where she could really pull it out of the detective.

She moved her mouth close to Jane's ear. "You could wear it to my father's speech tomorrow and you could take me out to a nice restaurant." Maura practically purred into Jane's ear and Jane found herself making mental notes to find a restaurant and make reservations as soon as possible. "And Jane?" Jane bit her lip as her name rolled off of Maura's lips and she felt the doctor lean further into her where they were breast to breast thanks to Maura's sky high heels. "You look absolutely ravishing in this suit, and we're not leaving until you tell me you're going to buy it." And then Maura was gone, walking across the room.

Jane narrowed her eyes at the mirror and Maura's smirking face behind her. "Oh, you're good." Jane said realizing she'd just been played like a well-tuned violin. Maura lifted an eyebrow flirtatiously with a slight tilt of her head. "Okay, stop!" Jane said turning back to the mirror, she could hear Maura laugh behind her. She fingered the blazer. She looked good, it felt good, and it would obviously be put to good use. "Fine," She caved. "I'll buy the damn suit."

…

Jane sat on the couch while she watched Maura pace back and forth. It was noon and they were at her apartment much to Maura's chagrin. Jane ended up getting the suit along with a nice pair of dark washed jeans and a few long sleeve shirts for the upcoming winter. But now she'd been listening to Maura rant (sometimes in French which Jane had never heard her do before) and trying to calm her nerves for close to five minutes. Even the dog got tired of walking back and forth with Maura and instead flopped down on her bed with a puff of air. Jane finally stood, having enough. She walked up behind Maura and stood her ground when Maura ran right into her. The detective raised her eyebrows and interlaced her fingers through one of Maura's hands to keep her from walking away. "Jane." Maura said tiredly trying to pull away, but Jane didn't budge.

The first kiss was soft, chaste and Jane didn't care about losing the stupid game they'd been playing all day. "You need to relax." Jane brought her other hand up to Maura's face and gently stroked her cheek with her thumb. "You are smart and successful and beautiful. Your parents love you." She could already feel Maura melting into her arms. She kissed her again only slightly longer than the first. "Relax." Jane murmured into Maura's lips. By the third kiss Maura had her arms wrapped around Jane's neck.

Somehow Maura wound up on her back on the couch with Jane hovering over her. The semi-awkward had one of Jane's legs squished between the back of the couch and Maura's leg and the other resting dangerously between Maura's thighs. She felt Maura pull her closer and her muscles strained under the stress of holding her body up. Maura broke the kiss for a split second. "You're not going to break me." The words came out as a heated whisper with the added weight of hands once again pulling her down. Slowly, Jane lowered her body down resting completely on top of Maura.

Before Jane could think about how amazing this position was Maura was kissing her again and the thinking stopped. What was meant to be a lesson in relaxation was quickly turned into something else entirely. Maura's body was moving underneath hers and her hands were up her shirt and Jane suddenly wasn't scared anymore. She nearly wanted to laugh because it was just a day since she thought about fumbling hands and awkward positions but there was a fire in the way Maura was kissing her, moving against her and she didn't want to fight it anymore. She was a quick thinker, she was sure between the two of them they could figure it out. Just as she was thinking it wouldn't be so bad if they did it right there on the couch, just as she rolled her hips into Maura's and Maura's hands reached the bottom of her bra, there was a vibrating sensation in a far too precarious position for her liking.

She jumped. Maura dropped her hands to her sides immediately. Jane reached between them grabbing the phone. "Rizzoli." She said into the speaker. In her struggle to sit up the knee that was between Maura's legs shifted up eliciting a gasp from the woman underneath her. "Sorry, sorry." Jane whispered away from the speaker. Maura unconsciously pushed herself further into the couch at the accidental touch. Jane's thought processes seemed to momentarily stall as she watched Maura's throat constrict as she swallowed. She licked her lips.

"Jane? Jane are you there?"

Jane blinked looking back at the phone in her hand. "Yeah, Ma, sorry, what is it?" One day she would learn to check the caller ID on her phone before answering.

"Why are you out of breath? Are you still shopping?"

"Just came into the apartment. That's…that's why I'm out of breath. You know the, uh, the stairs." She heard Maura laugh as she too sat up. Jane glared. "Why? Did you need our help with anything?"

"You weren't gone long, did you find anything at the store?"

"Yeah, I got what I was looking for." Jane was trying to look at anything other than Maura and her swollen lips.

"That's good."

"Hey, Ma we're – I'm kind of busy trying to find appropriate casual clothes for tonight. You know how Maura is." The woman in question quirked an eyebrow. "Was there something you needed?"

"Just remind Maura she was going to pick up the wine for tonight."

"She knows Ma. Wine got it." Maura nodded her head before leaning against the back of the couch.

"Tell her I've got everything under control."

"I will. Thank you, Ma. Love you."

"Love you both!"

Jane sighed as she slid the phone back into place on her belt. Maura was sitting cross legged facing her with her head resting on the back of the couch attempting to force back a yawn. "You're tired." Maura gave a half shrug. Jane smiled softly, and just like that the mood was gone. She stood from the couch and pulled Maura with her. She dragged Maura behind her to her bedroom. "I need to shower and you need to nap." She looked at her watch before Maura could protest. "It's almost one and parents will be at yours at seven. That's plenty of time for you to nap and for us to go get the wine." She walked into the bathroom knowing Maura would be in her bed when she came out.

…

By six the pair arrived at Maura's house complete with wine bottles in hand. Frankie and Tommy were already there slouched on the couch in their collared shirts and dark jeans. Maura parted to Angela in the kitchen, Jane was sure to apologize for that morning and not helping out with whatever. Jane made her way to her brothers. Tommy looked up laughing at Jane's attire. "Trying to impress the in-laws, Janie?"

Jane smacked him on the arm. "Shut up."

"Yeah," Frankie butted in. "Don't be mad just because the doc wanted your sister." He couldn't help but laugh at the sentence. Growing up people always told him his sister was a lesbian (although most of the time they used derogatory words that he didn't care for repeating) and it never bothered him. Hell, it still didn't bother him. But it was hilarious to him that at nearly thirty-six his sister and his brother both tried to go for the same girl and the girl chose his sister.

Tommy shrugged sitting back into the couch. "I've moved on."

"Good." Jane said before making a move to stand in front of the TV.

"Hey!" They both shouted simultaneously.

"You twerps listen to me." The both crossed their arms over their chests. Jane pointed a finger at them leaning in closer. "Best behavior tonight all right? Or I'm going to make sure you," She pointed at Frankie. "Don't see the walls of the homicide bullpen for a month. And I'll tell Ma," She looked at Tommy. "About your new girlfriend."

Tommy's jaw dropped. "How do you…"

"I'm a detective." She said cutting him off. "Don't underestimate my ability to find shit out. Do we have a deal?" They both nodded their heads as the doorbell rang. Jane glared one last time at her brother's before standing and walking to the hallways. Maura met her with a shaky nod of her head and opened the door.

Luggage was hauled in, introductions were made, and small talk took place while everyone sat around the table and passed food around. Jane found she liked Maura's dad's sense of humor. She got the sense that he brought levity to the table often between the seriousness that accumulated between Maura and Constance. She also found out that he was a history and anthropology professor at a university in France that she couldn't pronounce. She could tell by his accent though that he was originally from New York and through conversation she discovered he was a diehard Yankees fan. Of course that spurred conversation for a while between the Rizzoli men and Jane with him, but no matter that he was outnumbered at the table he stuck to his guns. Jane liked that. She couldn't help but think that Maura's parents – once she got passed the hard, somewhat cold exterior – were pretty decent people. They weren't _that_ scary, which came as a surprise to her.

When everyone was done eating Jane and her brother's helped clear the table while Angela and Constance spoke briefly like they were old friends. Sometimes Jane envied her mother for that particular gift. It was embarrassing too often but in times like those she enjoyed it. Shortly after, Angela left for the guest house while Frankie and Tommy left to go home, leaving only Jane and the Isles clan.

Peter and Constance Isles watched their daughter interact with her 'best friend.' The two of them were cleaning the dishes together in the kitchen while they themselves sat in the living room. Peter thought it was very obvious that his daughter and the detective were more than just friends. In the short time he'd been in contact with the tall, Italian woman he could tell there was a sort of protectiveness radiating from her and towards her daughter like some sort of bubble.

He took them in as they were at that moment. They were laughing in the kitchen. It was the first time that night he'd seen Maura so completely relaxed. Then there was the way they kept touching each other. They were simple touches, he gathered, but his daughter had never been a very strong tactile person and with this Jane character they bumped hips and elbows and leaned into each other's space to speak. But even if none of those things had been there, he could clearly see it in the way the pair looked at each other. He'd been noticing it all night and only then was it finally clicking inside his mind. Maura had looked on adoringly while Jane told a story about a funny experience she had as an officer. Jane looked on the same way anytime Maura spoke. While they were in the kitchen it was all he could see. He didn't even know if they were aware of it. He wrapped an arm around his wife. "When do you think she'll tell us?"

Constance looked up towards the kitchen a knowing smile on her face. "Whenever she's ready, dear."

In the kitchen Jane was trying her best to make Maura laugh. She just wanted her to relax a little. She could tell the few hours of sleep Maura had caught on her bed earlier were starting to wane thin as her yawning got progressively more frequent. All of the dishes had been washed and dried, Maura finally turned to Jane. "I want to tell them."

"If you're sure."

"I am." Maura nodded taking a deep breath. She took Jane's hand and walked into the living room. Peter and Constance looked at the pair as they walked towards them. Both parents found themselves trying to hide their smiles as they each noticed the hand holding. Maura stopped walking a little in front of the couch. "Mom," Maura looked at Constance. "Dad." She looked at Peter. She never had to do this. Growing up she'd never purposefully told her parents what was going on in her romantic life, but Jane wasn't someone she was aiming to hide from them. Jane was slowly becoming a part of her in a totally new way than she'd always been and she felt a need that she'd never felt before that her parents should know. Because it was serious between her and Jane and, she hoped at least, Jane was it for her. She took a deep breath and just decided to jump in with both feet. "Jane and I are dating." Jane squeezed her hand.

"Well it's about time you said something." Peter joked winking at Jane.

Maura looked confused for a moment. She tried to remember if she and Jane had done anything especially telling but her father laughed and Jane whispered _it was a joke _into her ear.

Constance gave her husband a look, one that Jane had seen a hundred times on Maura's face and she felt herself smiling again. (She was smiling too much lately, it was getting ridiculous.) Then the older woman turned her eyes onto Maura. Smiling, she gently patted the space next to her on the couch. "It seems we have a lot of catching up to do, tell me everything."

Maura blinked. "You-you're not mad?"

"At what, darling?"

Maura squinted her eyes perplexed as she looked between both of her parents. "That I'm… That Jane is a…"

"A decorated police detective who is protective of you?" Peter asked with a raise of his eyebrows. Jane already felt herself growing to like the man (despite him being a Yankees fan.)

"That you finally found someone that understands your father's affinity for old guns and baseball?" Constance played off her husband.

Jane felt the tension ease from her hand as Maura's grip lessoned. She heard and felt the long sigh that came from Maura's lips. Her shoulders dropped and Jane finally, finally saw that wide smile she loved grace her favorite person's face as she sat down next to her mother on the couch pulling Jane down next to her.

* * *

**A/N: **I'm definitely not done with the parents. Also this story only pertains to certain spoilers up to episode whatever the one was before the Hope thing (3x03/4?) that's relevant for Tommy being in this chapter and for the a later chapter thing, so keep that in mind. I plan to have this story finished before the premiere.

Thanks for reading!


	24. Helpful Advice

**A/N: **Thank you all so much! We've broken 300 reviews! And I give you all nice fist bumps(because hugs are terrible, even cyber ones!) I felt kind of bad about the last chapter and your reviews really made me feel better about it and gave me kind of an ego boost which helped fuel this chapter. Also warning: This chapter gets a little 'adult situation-y' in a certain place. You've been warned.

**Disclaimer: **Don't own. No money. ETC.

* * *

Detective Barry Frost stood on the steps outside of the courthouse waiting for his partner. She was bringing him coffee and promised a pastry, otherwise he wouldn't have been freezing his ass off waiting for her outside. No, actually, that was a lie. He would be waiting there regardless because that's what he did, but the unexpected cold front was still kicking his ass and he wished she'd hurry hers up at least a little bit. Just as he started hopping from foot to foot and blowing warm air into his cupped hands he saw his partner out of the corner of his eye walking up the many steps towards him. His eyebrows shot up at her attire.

It seemed she'd also missed the memo about the weather, but that wasn't what caught his eye most. It was the black and white suit she was wearing that made him do a double take. He'd worked with Jane long enough, knew her long enough, to have seen her in various states of dress. He'd seen hospital gowns, day old clothes, rumpled shirts, ratty jeans, mismatching socks, work out gear – anything and everything, he'd seen it all. He knew her style, he didn't get to be a homicide detective for nothing after all, and he could tell that she was not the hand behind that particular suit. The fit was too good, the fabric too nice, the style too fashionable. "Nice suit!" He smirked as Jane finally handed him his coffee and a small brown paper bag. "I can't believe she's already dressing you, Jane. Gotta say I thought you would've held out just a _little _bit longer." His smile grew at her scowl. "Come on, give me a spin." He twirled his index finger around in a circle in the air.

Jane gave him a leveling look. "Funny."

He reached forward with his free hand and fingered the blazer. "What kind of material is this? It's really nice."

Jane swatted his hand away. "What are you a girl?"

"You know I thought," He took a step back taking a sip of his coffee. "That being in a steady relationship would make you less…"

She raised an eyebrow. "Less…?"

He waited a second weighing his words in his head before speaking. "Less uptight, stressed," He smirked at her again. "_Frustrated." _

"Oh my god!" Jane threw her head back.

He laughed. "Just sayin' if…"

"Stop. Just stop."

He continued on nonetheless thoroughly enjoying ribbing her. "If it's bad you could always –"

But Jane was not about to listen to the rest of that sentence. "One, it's none of your business what I get up to in my personal life and two," She looked at the ground and took a large gulp of coffee before continuing in a hushed voice that Frost had to strain to here. "We haven't…_done…that…_yet, so…shut it."

"Really?"

Jane looked up at him her eyebrows furrowed at his genuinely surprised voice. "What?"

"It's Dr. Isles." He said as if that made all the sense in the world, like it was the key to the temple, like it was a pie and he was just about to shove it in her face. She didn't get it, and she definitely didn't like his tone. Noticing her continued confusion he spoke again. "I mean, come on Jane. She's…_you know_." He wiggled his eyebrows suggestively. Jane did not look amused. "If I was dating that fine –" Jane crossed her arms, cocking her jaw to the side. "– ly educated woman then…"

"Nice save."

He shrugged. "If you need any pointers I could alw –"

"No!" Jane stepped away heading into the courthouse. "No, no, no, no."

"I wasn't going to suggest a three way." He laughed as Jane looked at him horrified. It wasn't often that he got to do this with her, that he was able to joke and laugh about personal things with her and he always loved it when he could. It was utterly hilarious watching his collected, forceful, badass partner turn into a completely other person when her romantic escapades were brought up. "I could tell you a few tricks though, tell you some secrets of the female form." He moved his hands in front of him tracing an hourglass figure in the air, coffee, brown paper bag and all.

People were starting to stare at the two of them. Frost was looking like the cat that ate the canary and Jane was wishing the earth would open up and swallow her whole. "Look I _appreciate_," The word was forced making it known that she didn't actually appreciate anything. "The…thoughtfulness but this is not a conversation I want to be having with my partner – with you. Or anyone. Or at all. So if you will please focus on the job and be serious." She opened the door and stepped through trying desperately to get rid of the blush she felt might be a permanent accessory by this point. She could read the headlines already: _Homicide Detective Flustered in Court: A Sign of a Cover-up? _Or some other bullshit. She groaned and downed the rest of her coffee. It was going to be a long, long day.

…

Maura's first night with her parents in her house wasn't as bad as she thought it was going to be. They talked on the couch for what felt like hours, even after Jane had to go home. It was nice, a new, strange kind of nice but it was nice nonetheless. Whatever Jane had said to her mother all those months ago really snapped something into place for the three of them.

Growing up she always knew her mother and father loved her. They fed her, clothed her, gave her all the things she could ever want, she went to the best schools, and had the best tutors but those were all things. It was a combination of her parents never knowing what she wanted and needed, and her never being able to ask for those things, for comforts that led them down the road of serious, closed off silence.

Her parents never kept her adoption a secret, and as a little girl she was always afraid they would send her back to wherever it was she came from. Now, she knew where that was. It was Boston, it was ties to the Irish mob, it was a mother who thought she died at birth; it was lies and deceit and tragedy.

In a roundabout way it was everything she feared as a child. Anyplace they took her away from, in her young mind, was a thousand times worse than what she had with them. She was grateful to be with them. She never asked for much lest they send her back, it was an effort just to go to the boarding school in France. She pretended that she was as indifferent as they seemed. But at nearly thirty-seven the fact of the matter was that her mother, the woman who raised her when she didn't have to, the woman who housed her and clothed her and sent her to the best schools, stepped in front of a moving vehicle for her. And that, that one fact, changed everything.

When she got ready that morning for work she found her father sitting at her kitchen table with a cup of tea in front of him while he read the paper. Her mother walked around the counter and handed her a thermos full of coffee doctored exactly the way she liked it. As she walked out of the door she heard them both call after her to have a nice day and they would see her after work. It was odd. Like everything she knew was suddenly shifted in one direction but it didn't knock her off her feet or shake her foundation in any of the ways she thought it might. It made her feel…she wasn't quite sure but it was a good feeling, like she was finally at peace with something she thought she'd long ago given up on.

The day was relatively uneventful for Maura. By the time she got home her parents were in the midst of getting ready for the night. Jane had no idea when she'd be done in court, sometimes she got out really early, but most of the time the cases drudged over to the next day or continued on all week. To make matters easier she was just going to meet the Isles family, more specifically Maura and Constance, outside of the grand ballroom of the BCU campus. Maura was going to ride with her parents in the town car and, if she so desired, ride with Jane back home.

…

"So what is it you do for a living? Your name sounds very familiar." Maura wished her mother would come back or that Jane would finally get there. She'd listened to the man in front of her speak for far too long about the two years he spent backpacking across Europe before he went decided to go to BCU. He was a graduate student there now and she had yet to even bother remembering his name.

Jane hung back as Constance left Maura alone for a moment. She couldn't hear the conversation Maura was in the middle of but she didn't want to be rude and interrupt. She took in her surroundings. It was the first time she'd been to the beautiful campus outside of work and it was nice to take it in as a regular person and not look for places security cameras might be.

The crowd was split between different states of dress and different age levels. The younger the people were the less formally they dressed. Jane figured some of the professors were probably giving extra credit for attending based on the amount of actual college kids there were walking around. Then there were the adults who she guessed legitimately wanted to hear what was being said. Lots of people were talking to each other and standing around even though the doors to the room were open and people were standing there with programs ready to hand out.

"I'm the Chief Medical Examiner of the Commonwealth of Massachusetts." Maura rambled off as she looked over his head for Jane.

"Sounds impressive." He leaned into her, breathing onto Maura's face. She took a step backwards away from his bad breath. "So I was wondering…"

"I'm sorry." Maura cut in as her eyes finally landed on Jane who was still looking around the building in complete awe. "My date is here." She said pointing in Jane's direction.

The man followed the direction of her finger and laughed. It was an old trick for a girl to use one of her friends as a date. He was going to follow when he noticed the tall brunette wrap her arms around the woman he'd been talking to. His smirk dropped when he saw Maura place a kiss onto her cheek. The guy next to him couldn't help but laugh at his dejected stance.

Before Maura could explain her extra handsy approach to Jane, her mother greeted them both. "Come, I have seats for us at the front."

…

Maura stood in her kitchen as she fixed herself a cup of tea. Her parents were out having drinks with some of their friends and she did in fact ride back to her house with Jane. On more than one instance her eyes drifted towards that of her girlfriend. Jane was sitting on her couch shoeless, her knees separated by lots of space (a move Maura inferred came from her tomboyish background) and sipping a cold beer. She poured the tea into a mug and took a tiny tentative sip. The way that man talked to her had put something in her mind. Jane very rarely showed her upfront that she desired her. She knew on some level that Jane wanted her. She could see the classic signs of attraction, like the way Jane's eyes darkened a little bit before they kissed, the way her pupils dilated, how her breathing became shallow when she touched her. But she was always the one to initiate the touching, most of the kissing even. Was it all just a reaction to Maura's actions? She found herself questioning. Or did Jane truly desire her?

Maura thought of the way the men at the speech openly stared at her, openly appreciated the work she put into her appearance. Jane had only verbally told her she looked nice once and that was before their first date. "Jane?" She voiced still slightly unsure of what she was actually going to say.

"Yeah?"

_Do you find me attractive? Do you have desire for me? Do you want me? _Maura thought for a moment. "Do you want to have sex with me?" She didn't even feel the need to blush, because really that was what all of those other questions boiled down to.

Of course the unsuspecting detective was not in the loop of her lovely girlfriend's thought processes at that specific moment. And of course she was also in the middle of a generous drink of her beer. She coughed and hoped and prayed that beer did not end up coming out of her nose before she stumbled to her feet and walked into the kitchen.

"It's just," Maura continued looking into her mug. "I'm always the one to initiate the intimacy. I'm always the one with my hand up your shirt. I'm always the one pushing for more. I don't want you to feel pressured by me, at all. I want to make sure my advances weren't unwanted, that I – oh." Maura trailed off as Jane kissed her neck.

Jane took the mug from Maura's hands and put it on the counter. She swept Maura's hair to the side giving her access to her ear. "Of course I want you, Maura." She licked her lips thinking back to what Frost had said earlier that morning. Maura was dating _her_. She could have anyone she wanted, which was clearly evidenced at the speech, and yet she had chosen her. Maura was gorgeous and sexy and hot and Frost, as much as she hated to admit it, was right. But she hated it more that her insecurities turned into Maura's insecurities. "Of course I want to have sex with you." She hummed into Maura's ear. Her face blushed a fierce red.

Maura swallowed hard resisting the urge to grind back against Jane's body which was deliciously pressed into her own. She tried to get her bearings straight so she could form actual sentences but Jane – her wonderful, brave, sexy Jane – was kissing her neck again and Maura could feel her ragged breaths hitting her ear. And then she was pulling her to the couch and Maura was hiking up her skirt and putting her knees on either side of Jane's slim hips. "What – what are we doing?" Maura stuttered as Jane allowed the knuckle of her index finger to graze slowly down Maura's exposed thigh.

Jane smirked as she shifted her dark eyes onto Maura's hazel. "I'm initiating the intimacy." She repeated the move. She was trying her best to seem confident and collected. Trying her absolute best to make it seem like she knew _exactly _what she was doing, like she had a plan. She had learned that even fake confidence could carry her further than no confidence at all. That whole 'fake it 'till you make it' business was not a lie and more often than not it worked in her favor. She just hoped that this was one of those instances.

"You are?" Maura did not intend for the words to sound like a question but they had.

Jane chuckled. "Yes." She swallowed hard before putting her slightly shaking hands on top of Maura's bare thighs. "Is that okay?" She traced her thumbs in light circles against Maura's smooth skin. She figured if she could start it off slow then it wouldn't be so scary. If she could get a feel for the water then she could just dive in.

"Yes." Maura breathed in response as Jane playfully dipped a finger into underneath the hem of her skirt.

"You're right, you know?" Jane's fingers were now dancing over Maura's ass.

If Maura had been thinking clearer she would've said something like _I'm always right, _because she was, most of the time. But as it were, she was not thinking clearly because Jane had her hands on her ass and she was sitting on Jane's lap and it was all far too nice for any form of deep cognitive thought. Instead she only spoke two words. "About what?"

"That I don't ever do this." She grabbed two handfuls of Maura's top and gently pulled upwards untucking the garment. "Which," Her heart beat faster as she slowly put one hand underneath Maura's shirt. The exploration was slow and thoughtful. Jane guided her hands over all of the dips and curves of Maura's smooth skin. "Is a damn shame." And it really was. Because all of this time she'd been missing out on all of these things that _she _was causing. Like the hitch in Maura's breath when she touched her, the way she slowly, unconsciously, shifted in her lap, the way she bit her lip, how her eyes grew darker – more green, more brown. She'd been missing out on so, so many things. But, she thought as her hands once again moved down Maura's back, she was more than willing to play catch up.

Maura had no idea when she started the conversation that this would happen. No idea that she would wind up straddling Jane while Jane touched her. It was far better than she could've imagined and it was really only Jane's hands on her back. It shouldn't have felt the way it did but there was a streak of desire encompassing her entire body. It had been so, so long since she felt anything of this magnitude for another person. It wasn't just about two people, two bodies reaching to an end goal. No, it was far, far more than that which was what made it feel so unthinkingly _good_. She could hardly concentrate on anything, but Jane's voice was sounding like aged whiskey in her ear again.

Jane settled her hands onto Maura's hips again. She looked up, trying not to get caught on Maura's cleavage. "Of course I want you, Maura." She said it again because the words bore repeating. She needed Maura to know she was telling the truth, that it was a solid fact even, that she wanted this, everything, all the time. She needed her to know that she was going crazy because of it too. She started unbuttoning Maura's top struggling to retain eye contact as her fingers fumbled with the buttons. "You're gorgeous." Two buttons down. "And hot." Maura laughed breathlessly at that and Jane smiled genuinely as more buttons came undone. "I want you." Jane practically growled. She didn't feel like she was faking it anymore. She was just doing what felt right, and maybe that was the key to the whole thing to begin with. Maura practically whimpered and Jane felt something rise in her chest at the sound. "I want you all the time." How she was still talking was beyond her. "When I'm at my desk." She was at those perilous buttons over the swell of Maura's breasts and Jane felt her hands tremor slightly and her eyes dip for just a second. "When I'm in the shower." Another button. "Sometimes," Jane shot a cocky smile at Maura. "Especially when I'm in the shower."

And then Maura definitely moaned and Jane definitely felt the grind of Maura's hips against hers. Jane shifted on the couch taking up the same position as the day before, Maura on her back and she hovering over her. She ground her hips down into Maura's eliciting another moan from the doctor. Jane let her lips travel down the column of Maura's throat, licking and sucking in certain places. One hand was tangled in honey colored hair while the other trailed reverently over yoga toned abs. Her mouth traveled lower over a collarbone, over a bra strap, straight down the valley of her breasts and then back up again.

Maura was grateful that breathing fell into the involuntary smooth muscle category. If it didn't she was fairly certain she would've forgotten to tell her body to breathe as Jane moved against her, kissed her, touched her.

"I don't know what I'm doing." Jane husked into her ear. Her own breathing was becoming ragged. She wasn't even aware of the words coming out of her mouth, she just knew there were other things she wanted to be doing. One of Maura's knees was bent almost digging into her waist. Jane ran a hand over the outside of the thigh and under Maura's skirt until she was caressing Maura's ass and what was she assumed was lace.

Maura rolled her eyes back at the touch. "God." She moaned pushing her back into the couch.

"I'm flying by the seat of my pants here, Maur." Jane said again while she kissed down Maura's jaw.

"Well your pants are flying high." Jane raised an eyebrow at Maura and they both started laughing at the absurdity of the sentence.

Maura brought Jane in for a kiss. Jane let her fingertips graze over the lace while Maura's hands tangled into her dark unruly hair. They both settled into the kiss quickly. Maura hooked her ankle over Jane's knee bringing the detective closer to her. Jane moaned into her mouth at the added contact. They both wanted more. The kiss deepened and tongues danced together and the give and take of dominance wore on until Maura's front door opened and the sound of laughter drifted into the room. Maura gasped, wrenching her mouth away from Jane's. Jane froze on top of her for a spilt second before Maura knocked her off into the floor as she made her exit to the master bedroom.

Jane completely forgot that Maura's parents were staying with her and she definitely didn't blame Maura for pushing her off. But it didn't mean it didn't hurt. She didn't have the time or the mental capacity to catch herself and the left side of her head ended up grazing the edge of the coffee table. She stayed on the ground stunned for a brief moment until she felt warm wetness trickle down the side of her face. Immediately she scrambled to her feet with a hand pressed against the side of her head while she raced to the hallway bathroom trying desperately not to get blood onto Maura's beige carpet.

Constance and Peter Isles stared at the lanky detective as she made the mad dash. They didn't know where their daughter was they assumed she was there because Jane was. "What was that all about?" Constance uttered to her husband. He shook his head at a loss. If he was being honest he'd long ago given up trying to understand women.

...

Jane stood in the bathroom with blood dripping down her face. She had no idea what she was supposed to do. She would've turned on the faucet but the blood coating her hands stalled her. She always had to catch her runaway thoughts when blood got on her hands. It was a residual effect of a serial killer and scalpels and a basement, of the amount of times she'd put pressure on a wound and told, begged, pleaded for the stranger turned friend (or friend turned family member) to just stay with her until help – better help – arrived.

She didn't know why she was bleeding that bad really, she barely even clipped the table, but red was dripping into a puddle in the sink and it was hard to breathe. "_Shit. Shit. Shit." _She mumbled over and over still unable to do anything but watch the blood drip and hope none of it got on her brand new suit. _This _was exactly why she'd told Maura it was too nice. Because inevitably, she'd do some 'bull in a China shop' move and ruin it.

Maura walked out into the living room in a new set of clothes. She chose lounge wear thinking it would look the least suspicious and she threw her hair into a ponytail after dealing with the mess that Jane had caused. But as she stepped fully into the living room Jane was nowhere to be seen. For a moment she thought maybe Jane had left, she certainly wouldn't have blamed her, but then she walked past the hallway bathroom and heard a four letter expletive. She knocked on the door. "Jane?"

Jane took a deep breath at Maura's voice. "Can you come in here?"

When Maura opened the door her jaw dropped. "Oh, my god!" She grabbed the nearest hand towel and pressed it the wound with one hand and turned the water on with the other.

Jane put her hands under the water watching as the sink filled red. Her heart thudded in her chest, she felt her knees growing weaker. "Maur." She croaked.

"Toilet." Maura directed. "Sit on the toilet." She grabbed another towel handing it to Jane to dry her hands off. Sitting down with her hands clean, she felt better but she could finally feel the pain. She had no idea Maura shoved her that hard. "Take off your shirt."

"I feel like we've done this far too many times." Jane joked as she untucked the pure white button up that she hoped was still white after all of that.

Maura wished she had a third arm, that she was a second person because her good first aid kit was in the hall closet and she didn't want to leave Jane alone because she caused this and Jane was still looking considerably pale and her hands were still shaking. Finally Jane had the shirt unbuttoned and shrugged out of it and the blazer at the same time leaving her in only a white tank top. "I'm so, so sorry, Jane. I feel awful."

Jane shrugged. "It's fine, Maura."

"I hurt you!"

Jane laughed, raising her one visible eyebrow at Maura. "I'd rather this happen than have your parents walk in on me taking their daughter on the couch. Besides," She shrugged again. "It doesn't even hurt." She lied.

Maura gave her a knowing look. "You don't have to lie for my benefit, Jane."

There was a knock on the doorframe. "Is everything all right in…" Constance trailed off as she saw half of Jane's face covered in blood. "What on earth happened?" Maura sighed in relief that her parents apparently saw nothing.

"I can be a real klutz sometimes and fell into the coffee table." Jane answered. It wasn't technically a lie so she knew if she needed Maura could repeat the answer.

Maura looked to her mother. "There's a first aid kit in the hall closet, could you get it for me?"

…

An hour or so later Jane and Maura stood on the front porch. Maura ended up giving Jane three small stiches so it wouldn't scar too badly and to help with the bleeding. Maura traced her fingers over the gauze pad now covering the wound near Jane's left eyebrow. "I'm so sorry, Jane."

Jane grabbed the hand and intertwined their fingers. "Stop apologizing."

"I'm just so sorry I caused you physical pain."

Jane dropped her head a little bit. "If you kiss it it'll make me feel better."

Maura smiled softly at Jane. She leaned up on her tippy toes and put a gentle kiss to the gauze. "I'm sorry."

"I know." Jane nodded her head seriously, looking into Maura's eyes. "And really it's kind of funny if you think about it."

"Your definition of humor and my definition of humor greatly differ then."

Jane laughed. "So tell me the rules, doctor."

"I'd prefer you not to wash your hair in the morning but if you have to be careful. I know you have court in the morning again, so a band-aid should cover it. If you can swing by the morgue at lunch or whenever you can tomorrow I'd like to take a look at it again."

"You sure you don't just want to have lunch with me?" Jane ribbed.

"And what if I do?" Maura played back.

"Then I say it's a date and I'll be there whenever they call recess." The cold was biting at Jane through the thin yoga pants and t-shirt she was wearing. After Maura patched her up she was forced to change clothes and into leaving the suit with Maura who was sure to take it to the cleaners. She shivered.

"You should've borrowed one of my coats." Maura commented while she rubbed Jane's bare arms.

"Sleeves would be too short, but I do need to get going. Jo Friday needs a walk and all." Maura nodded but neither made a move in either direction. Jane grinned. "Can I at least get a goodbye kiss? I mean after everything tonight –" She was cut off by Maura's lips over hers.

The kiss was soft and gentle very different than the one from earlier. Maura pulled away a smile on her face. "Goodnight, Jane."

Jane grinned taking a step back. "Goodnight, Maura."

* * *

**A/N:** I wanted to thank Twiskers for the Frost idea, it was probably not what you had in mind but it was pretty hilarious to write. I've never had so much fun writing something as I did writing this one. Also, thanks and hello to the new followers (and the old ones for sticking around!)

Thanks for reading!


	25. Enough

**A/N: **The thing about writing a flufftastic story is that when you're an emotional wreck it's incredibly difficult to write which is a prelude to: if this chapter has a different vibe, or voice, or tone than the other ones sorry about that. I tried to curb it as much as possible but I probably slipped somewhere. Also: adult themes.

**Disclaimer: **Don't own. No money. ETC.

* * *

Jane stood in the foyer of a mansion on the upper side of Boston. She hardly ever ventured into this area, hardly ever wanted to even. If it weren't for her job or Maura she never would, given the choice she'd rather not. That second reason was why she was there to begin that night, it was why she was rubbing elbows with Boston's elite, why she was dressed so out of character for her. It was Maura. It was always Maura.

It always astonished her that the nearly petite woman could talk her (her steadfast, stick to her guns, stubborn self) into practically anything. It annoyed her how with one look at her with that pouty lip and the completely _crushed _face and slightly teary eyes, that she could cave that easily. Maura could get her to do anything, _be _anything, with that look. One day, she vowed, she was going to figure out Maura's formula and dish it back at her just to see how she liked it. But this particular evening she had a pretty good idea how it happened.

She had gone to lunch with Maura as planned but before they could eat the doctor had insisted on caring for Jane's wound. A thing, if Jane were being completely honest, she had pretty much forgotten about. That's how much on a nonissue it was. But Maura, of course Maura saw it differently. She had Jane sit on a stool while she did her medical duties. Only those duties entailed having her boobs practically shoved in Jane's face for an extended period of time. She put some antibiotic ointment on the cut, studied the stitches, and then gently put a new band aid on it. The stupid cut was getting more attention than Jane thought it deserved, and she could've done all of those things herself, a fact she neglected to point out because she was distracted.

Jane sat with Maura's steady voice humming somewhere above her while she stared at Maura's boobs in a completely unprofessional manner in a very professional environment while not listening to a word Maura was saying. All she could think about was pale skin and a maroon bra and lace she couldn't see. All she could think about was Maura's breathy moans in her ear and a leg wrapped around her hip. She shifted on the stool as she felt a blush rise to her cheeks.

They were so close last night, so close to getting rid of that final barrier between them. Jane had to admit it was great. It made her feel magnificent even, that she, _she, _could make Maura make those sounds, those movements. Suddenly that step wasn't so terrifying, or life altering or any of those big giant scary thoughts she'd had before. She wanted it, she knew Maura wanted it, wanted her. It was just a matter of finding the right time, the right moment, the right day.

Maura eventually stepped away from her with an expectant look on her face clearly waiting for Jane to answer some question. Jane rather than admit she hadn't been listening just said 'yes' out of complete reflex without knowing just what exactly she was agreeing to. A fact that didn't seem to matter much when Maura broke out into that wide, bright eyed, dimple popping smile of hers. She figured anything that could make Maura smile like that ought to be a good thing.

She was wrong.

After another full day of court, another day of waffling defense attorney's, charged silence, and repeating her testimony of the evidence and the investigation she was head of for what felt like a thousand times Jane found herself in a small boutique in Boston with the Isles women.

Jane had lost count of the amount of dresses and suits that she was forced to try on and model for them. What she had agreed to, apparently, was being Maura's date to a charity event. One in which the Isles family was a vocal and responsible partner of. They were like on the board of directors or something and just _had _to attend while they were in town, of course bringing Maura with them. And apparently where Maura went Jane went too.

She was tired, having not gotten much sleep the night before. She'd gone home after…after the heavy, _heavy _make out session with Maura completely wired. So wired and hyped up that she cleaned her whole damn apartment and took Jo for a midnight run and took a cold shower and she _still _felt jittery. It was close to three AM when she finally got some rest. Regardless, she liked to humor Maura and Maura's face was priceless every time she came out of the dressing room to show off. But after a certain amount of time, even that was grating on her.

It wasn't until the sales associate put a pantsuit in her hands and promptly shoved her back into the room that Jane decided that it was going to be the last one. She put the suit on. She was only calling it a suit for lack of a better phrase. To her, a suit was supposed to make her feel powerful. It was supposed to work in her favor, not against it. They were practical for practical reasons and useful. But the one she was currently wearing was kind of the opposite of all of that. She liked it, she guessed. It just wasn't really _her._ And it wasn't practical at all. The pants were too tight to chase down bad guys and the top was far too low cut to wear in a professional setting, but she definitely felt more comfortable in it than in anything else she tried on. She would take it if Maura so much as smiled at it.

The second she stepped out into the small alcove her eyes landed on her girlfriend's. She ignored the gasp of delight from Constance and the line about being a supermodel from the sales associate instead choosing to focus solely on Maura.

She stood from her place next to her mother and walked slowly towards Jane. Jane saw Maura's hazel eyes rake over her figure, felt herself stand a little straighter at the slight hum from her lips, and she felt a surge of arrogance wash over her as she witnessed those hazel eyes become impossibly darker. Maura looking at her like she was a million bucks always sent pride coursing through her. Maura walked around her in a circle in an almost predatory way. Constance and the sales associate were talking amongst themselves at that particular moment and therefore missed Maura's stray finger as it grazed her ass. Jane however, did not. She jumped a little on the spot. Maura shot her a smirk with an incredibly flirtatious eyebrow lift before turning to her mother. "This is the one."

That had been hours ago though, so long ago that it seemed like another lifetime. Or maybe that was just the tiredness creeping in. All she knew was that she wanted to leave. She took one last glance at the sharply dressed people mingling in throughout the large space.

Her eyes landed on Maura. She didn't even notice Jane had vacated the area, she was so engrossed in the mingling. She watched as Maura shook hand after hand, shared an obnoxious laugh, and nodded seriously to all the different people she encountered. Jane hated this particular version of Maura. She understood on some basic level that it was needed for her to be the person she was in that environment. It was a means of survival, an adaptation that Maura had to learn growing up. She understood, but she didn't like it.

In fact she hated it. She hated how easy it seemed for Maura to be able to turn it on and turn it off and turn it on, hated how she became a completely different person under the watchful, scrutinizing gaze of Boston's most wealthy. She thought maybe after all of the times Maura dragged her to these kinds of things, it would've gotten easier, but there was something about this time, this event, this moment that just rubbed her the wrong way. She took a deep breath before opening the door and walking outside.

It didn't occur to her that Maura had her wallet or that her coat was still inside in the coat room with her cell phone in the inside pocket_._ She also had no idea how to get home from where she was because she'd ridden in the backseat of the town car next to Maura and Constance while Peter took the front passenger seat. But she wasn't going to go back into that building. She'd rather walk home in the torture devices Maura called shoes and freeze her ass off rather than go back into that utterly suffocating building.

It was far too fake and plastic and superficial for her liking. There was too much hoity-toity bullshit floating around, too many egos, too many underhanded compliments. Then there were the creepy men, which were an entire issue on their own.

The second the four of them had arrived Constance swept Maura away to go talk to some family friends or something leaving her with Peter. He was nearly too preoccupied with his own search for people he knew but he was polite enough to introduce her to someone before running off on his own. Jane briefly wondered if that was what it had been like for Maura growing up attending these types of functions. She wondered if her parents just ran off in separate directions leaving her to fend for herself in the lion's den.

The thought was interrupted, however, when Peter introduced her to an older gentleman, his money was in oil or fishing or both Jane didn't quite care. Peter introduced her as 'Jane Rizzoli, one of Boston's finest.' Jane had smiled and stood taller at the introduction. All her life Jane loved the fact that people called first responders 'finest.' It was a big deal to her, no one knew just how much she actually loved it but she did. It made her feel special and important. Being the 'finest' of anything was pretty damn awesome in her book. It was of how it set her (and others like her) apart from the rest of society because they were the ones that did what no one else wanted to do. But then the man had looked at her, he ran his green eyes over her lithe form with a cocky smile on his stupid face and he'd said "You certainly _are _one of Boston's finest. Can I offer you a drink?" And Jane felt physically ill.

Maybe it was just because she was tired and hungry and a little grumpy. She flexed her jaw realizing only then that she'd been clenching it tight, grinding her teeth all night. The cold wind blew her hair to the side and for a split second she thought about going back in, just to get her coat before deciding against it.

She could hang with the worst of the worst, the lowest of the low. She could tell truth from lie with an incredibly high accuracy rate amongst Boston's murderers, rapists, and psychopaths. She could go toe to toe with just about anyone and come out on top, regardless if they were bigger. (Because bigger didn't necessarily mean braver, stronger, smarter. Bigger just meant bigger in most cases and that, often, was her greatest advantage.) But these people had their own code, their own language, their own rule book. They were a different breed. And Maura was one of them.

She sighed rubbing a tired, sore hand over her face. She hated how being around them, being around that version of Maura, made her feel so unbelievably inadequate. It wasn't just this particular time, it was every single time. Even the day before at the college, she felt that way. When she was pulled from her element, when the badge and the gun were stripped from her, she was nothing but Jane. She never liked Jane. That was the only thing those people saw. They didn't see a decorated detective when they looked at her, they saw Jane. They saw the low class shmuck who shouldn't be in the same room as them without wearing a waiter's uniform. To them she was South Boston. She was paycheck-to-paycheck, not new money or old money but no money. She had that blue collar stink and didn't belong in their world of high stakes ego.

It led to other thoughts too. Like if Maura was one of them then wouldn't Maura feel as they feel? Like she was all of those things? Which opened up an entire can of worms, multiple cans actually. She found her shoulders sinking down with each step, like her back bone was disintegrating as she walked.

She made it halfway down the obnoxiously long driveway before she heard the telltale sound of the familiar pattern of clicking heels on cement. "Where are you going?" The patronizing tone in Maura's voice left a bad taste in Jane's mouth. Maura wasn't as good at turning it on and off as she expected her to be.

"Home." Was Jane's one word reply. She shoved aching hands as deep as they would go into her pockets. She wanted a beer…or two and a pizza and to watch the DVR'd game on her TV.

"So you're just going to leave with no explanation?" Maura asked incredulously. She noticed when Jane left, she'd been keeping an eye on her all night. She wanted to stay with her, but her mother swept her away and she nearly let herself get sucked in. Just as she'd been thinking that she saw Jane out of the corner of her eye open the door and leave.

Jane continued walking. "Go, be with your people. Don't let me ruin your night."

Maura nearly growled in frustration. "You can't keep hating me for where I come from, Jane!"

"I don't hate you, I lo…" She spun around as she said the words only her feet in those stupid shoes got all twisted underneath her and she wound up on the pavement. She kicked out of the godforsaken heels wondering how in the world she always wound up in losing situations. Now her right ankle burned and pain shot up her leg on top of everything else.

Maura was too stunned by Jane's almost love confession to even think about helping the woman to her feet. "You what?" Her heart fluttered in her chest. Was Jane going to say love? Did she really love her? In that romantic capacity that she so wished she returned? Because Maura was sure, she'd been sure all those weeks ago when she sat opposite Jane on the couch. It wasn't known, the word for the things she had felt then was unknown to her, but she knew now, she knew then standing between where she came from and where she wanted to be.

"Nothing." Jane hissed. She stumbled to her feet with a slight limp. She grimaced at her almost confession. That wasn't what she meant to say. It wasn't at all what she had in mind. She hadn't even thought about it that much, love and Maura, aside from that one night when she freaked out about it. Words always screwed her over, it was why she was an action kind of girl. She couldn't remember the last time she said the words 'I love you' strung together in a line like that. Standing there frustrated and angry and tired was the wrong time to say that sentence.

Maura blinked, logic taking over her like it always did. "Wait, so you're just going to do what? Walk home barefoot?"

Jane shrugged trying to ignore the tears burning behind her eyes. She was just so angry. The court case she was in the middle of looked like the guy was going to walk. She was flat out exhausted in all the ways a person could be exhausted and she was hungry. Maybe if her day had been shorter, if there hadn't been court, the lunch break that only seemed to increase her frustration, the shopping trip, and the charity event all in the same day, she may have felt different. But the truth of the matter was that Jane was terrible at handling her emotions, it all built up throughout the day and if she didn't remove herself from the situation she was going to end up doing or saying something she would regret later. "Give me my wallet." She demanded turning towards Maura who she noticed also had her coat.

"No." Maura took a step back.

"No?"

"We need to talk about this, before it causes a problem between us."

Jane rolled her eyes and gave a frustrated sigh. "It's not you, okay? It's me. My personal junk, my business."

"I've said it before and I'll say it again: you are my business." Maura said taking a step forward.

"I'm not you." Jane snapped.

"If you would set aside your own prejudices…"

"My prejudices?" Jane interrupted heatedly. "Do you know how many times I was asked to 'take care of' some big shot's parking ticket? Do you not see the way those people look at me? They know, Maura. They know I'm just playing dress up here, like some charity case. I'm not a charity case!" Her voice echoed around the cold empty space. "And it makes me feel," Her voice cracked on the word. "It makes me feel stupid, inadequate, lousy. Like I'm not enough and never will be." She gave a hopeless shrug. "I don't even hold their opinion in a high regard but people look at you one way for an entire evening and you get ideas."

"Jane," Maura said softly reaching out for the other woman.

Jane snatched her coat and wallet from Maura's now limp arm. "I don't hate you for where you come from, Maura. It made you who you are, and I love who you are." Not a love confession, but near enough. "But you need to understand that it's not where _I _come from."

"You're more than adequate, Jane." But the compliment was said to deaf ears as Jane called a cab from her cell phone relaying the address before hanging up.

"You should go back inside." Jane said flatly. "I bet your parents are wondering where you are."

Maura bent down picking up the shoes Jane was going to leave behind. "They aren't." She said in a voice so quiet Jane had to strain to hear. "When I was younger, old enough to go with them to these types of events, I would play a game. When we got to wherever it was we were going I would mingle for a few minutes and then run off to some corner of the house, usually the library." Jane smiled sadly at the image of a young Maura dressed to the nines running to find an empty library to get away from people, to see if anyone cared enough to follow. "My parents never knew I was gone." Maura looked up from the shoe her eyes locking immediately on Jane's. "I'm sorry that I drug you here without properly noticing you weren't enjoying yourself. I think I was just so caught up in my parents that I never thought about you. That was selfish of me. I'm also sorry if I've ever made you feel like you weren't enough for me. Because I assure you, Jane, you're more than enough."

Jane softened immediately at the words. Maura wasn't a 'them.' She could have been, but she wasn't. She chose not to be. And really Maura didn't drag her to those kinds of places that often. "I'm just having a bad day." She said scratching the back of her neck.

"I didn't even ask."

"I'll consider your turn in court tomorrow, my payback."

"That bad?"

Jane shrugged. The taxi she called pulled up the driveway. She looked at the cab and then back at Maura. "Look, I-I'm going to go. I've got a headache and I'm afraid if I go back in there I'll deck someone." Maura laughed a bit at that and Jane smiled easily at the sound. "You stay though, be with your parents." Jane gave her a lopsided grin. "How often do they request your presence?" She said all of this while hoping Maura would slide into the taxi next to her, no matter how selfish that was. She opened the cab door. "You can call me later if you're bored or whatever."

"Jane?" Maura's voice was full of uncertainty.

Jane paused one foot (still bare) rested inside the cab. "Yeah, Maur?

"Are we okay?"

Jane gave her a knowing look. "Yeah, we're okay." Then Jane shut the door of the cab and Maura watched it leave until she couldn't see the taillights any longer.

…

When there was a knock on Jane's apartment door, she answered with her half-drunk beer in one hand and a crumpled twenty in the other, still wearing that stupid suit. She'd only just gotten there not even ten minutes ago. Beer and calling for pizza had been her only priority. But when she opened the door it wasn't who she thought it was. "You're not the pizza guy." Jane commented bringing her beer to her lips.

Maura intercepted the item. She grabbed the cold bottle from Jane's hands and downed it. Jane blinked. Maura actually downed half her beer in one go. She furrowed her eyebrows as Maura handed her the empty bottle. She took a determined step into her home pushing past the stunned brunette. "I get it, now, Jane." Maura said as she walked into Jane's bedroom. Jane locked her door and followed her curiously. "Unzip me?" Maura asked authoritatively. She held her hair up away from her neck and waited for Jane to do as she asked. Stunned, Jane had no idea what was going on but she did as she was told trying to ignore the sensations coursing through her at Maura's newly exposed skin. Her knuckle dragged along each vertebra in Maura's spine as she pulled the zipper down. She loved the reaction Maura seemed to have for her touch. "Thank you." The honey haired doctor said curtly once the zipper was all the way down. She stepped away from Jane.

Jane watched transfixed as Maura shimmied out of her dress and walked around her room to her closet. In nothing but her underwear. Her very skimpy, very matching black underwear. In a last ditch effort to control her thoughts (and actions) and to listen to what Maura was saying she turned around putting her back to Maura.

"I went back," Maura started talking again. "It felt wrong, even though you told me to go back inside and enjoy the rest of the evening I couldn't!" She opened one of Jane's drawers and selected a tee shirt before pulling it on. "I realized I wasn't enjoying myself before or after you left. I never enjoy myself at those things. Yes, sometimes I do, but never the kind of joy I feel when I'm around you or with the guys at the robber. I never understood it until then." Maura's tone was full of passion, full of someone who finally understood something they never did before. It was all shock and awe and amazement.

"I _saw_ it Jane!" Maura claimed exasperatedly. She hung her dress in the closet. "I went back inside and saw all of these things I've never noticed before. I could never understand why others felt uncomfortable in that type of environment. That was where I grew up. _I'm _uncomfortable at amusement parks." Jane smiled at the wall she was facing. "That's what I always equated it to, a preference of sorts. But I went back inside and I saw the tight lipped smiles and heard the backhanded compliments and the sheer snootiness of it all finally hit me."

Jane snorted at Maura's word choice before she felt a hand on her shoulder turning her around. Their eyes met, Maura's pleading with her to understand what she was saying and Jane's full of wanting to understand. "I know you're not making me choose, that you would never make me choose, but I don't want to be that person. I want to be the person I am when I'm around you all the time. I want to be the person I am when I'm around our friends, our family." She hoped Jane understood what she was saying. "I choose you, and Boston, and the Chief Medical Examiner position, and everything that all of those things entai –"

Maura's speech was cut off by Jane's lips pressing into her own. The dominance was quickly won over though and Maura had Jane pressed against the wall. It was then as her hands trailed down Maura's body that Jane noticed Maura neglected to put on pants. She moaned into the kiss as Maura's tongue met her own.

Maura started unbuttoning Jane's top still keeping the kiss going. When her the top was finally open revealing a landscape of lean muscle and tan skin she had a flashback of every time she'd seen Jane shirtless, every time she'd wanted to reach out and touch her abdominal muscles and she did just that. Jane's head fell back into the wall as Maura's incredibly soft hands kneaded her abs. "Do you have any idea how amazing you are?" Jane swallowed hard as Maura's mouth trailed down the middle of her breasts. Her fingers stroked the scar on Jane's side. "A bullet went through you and you are still alive." Maura accentuated with a kiss to Jane's clavicle. Jane's breath hitched at Maura's words.

"Jane," Maura said causing Jane to once again look at her. "I want this. I want you. You said earlier Jane that you don't feel like you're enough," She took a step closer bringing her mouth tantalizingly close to Jane's. "Let me show you you're more than enough." The shirt that was only barely hanging on to Jane's shoulders slipped and fell to the floor behind Jane's feet.

"Maura," Jane groaned as Maura's hands danced down her abs and played at the top of her pants.

Hands immediately stopped moving and retracted. "If you don't want to it's fine, Jane. Really it is." Maura gave Jane's bicep a reassuring squeeze. "I can wait as long as you need me to. I just want you to know that when you're ready, I'm ready." She was about to take a step around Jane to go into the living room when Jane grabbed her wrist.

"Your parents?" The detective prompted.

"They don't live here, Jane."

Jane laughed as she pulled Maura close to her. "I might be really bad at this."

Maura smiled genuinely at her. "There are books, videos." She leaned in to Jane's ear. "We could always practice."

Jane swallowed hard. "Don't laugh at me?"

"Never." Maura smiled genuinely at her.

Jane took a steadying breath. With the way Maura was looking at her eyes so full of emotion, Jane didn't even have to ask if she'd be there in the morning. She just knew. She had a feeling that this was how they were always supposed to be. That had there been a differing of circumstances one day, eventually they would end up together, always. She would have to make a mental note to find out if Maura felt the same. Jane held Maura's gaze as she backed them towards the bed. This was her best friend, her girlfriend, her favorite person. She took a step forward pressing their lips together in a soft, slow, passionate kiss hoping to put everything she couldn't find the words to say and more into the one moment. Maura gave it all, and more right back at her and she found herself smiling.

She paused a moment to kick the door closed, forgetting about her pizza order entirely as Maura's hands moved from her shoulders to the belt buckle of her pants. They stumbled towards the bed. Maura's shirt fell to the floor along with Jane's pants leaving them both in just their underwear. Maura's knees hit the back of the bed. Jane broke the kiss only long enough to say, "No turning back after this, Maura."

"I think," Maura said sensually as her right hand moved to the clasp of Jane's bra. "We crossed that line a very long time ago."

Whatever stupid comment that lay at the tip of Jane's tongue ready to burst free and ruin the moment was silenced by her bra being unhooked and Maura's hand cupping her left breast through the material before Jane shrugged it off. Jane let her body rest against Maura's as her bra was thrown into some random location. The feeling of skin to skin contact with such minimal barriers between them was intoxicating and Maura, too, felt her train of thought leave her at Jane's heated kiss, her touch, as her own bra was unhooked and shrugged off.

Jane felt a wave of desire and want and need flush her system at every touch of Maura's deft hands against her hot, hot skin. She knew that there wasn't going to be any faking tonight. And she knew absolutely without a doubt that Maura felt the same. That this moment, with the two of them lying in bed together, moving against each other, was a long time coming. That it was right and good and whole and real. It was more than a means to an end, more than one desired goal. There was passion. There was love. Even though neither of them said the treacherous word it was there behind every reverent touch, every kiss, every dark eyed, wide eyed stare as the last and final barriers were shed.

In the end it didn't matter that there was flubbing hands or awkward first touches. It didn't matter that 'I love you's' weren't confessed in the throes of passion or in the wake of it. It didn't matter that there was giggling or butting heads or the knocking of hands or confusion. It didn't matter that it wasn't perfect or seamless. Because they were together in all the ways two people could be together and that they both decided was more than enough.

* * *

**A/N: **This chapter took a lot of crazy turns. And again, sorry if the vibe is off. There are two chapters left. Like a real one, and an epilogue of sorts.

Thanks for reading!


	26. Together

**A/N: **This chapter is a little intense. There's adult themes/situations. Again, only "spoilers" were taken into account up to like 3x03.

**Disclaimer: **Don't own. No money. ETC.

* * *

Jane opened her eyes slowly before closing them again. She snuggled closer to the body around her, letting herself get absorbed in the skin on skin contact. Images from the night before danced underneath her eyelids as Maura sighed heavenly in her arms burrowing closer to her. Maura, was all her brain could process. Maura and her toned body. Maura's voice in her ear, panting and breathy, telling her _'don't stop,' _and '_right there, god, right there.' _Maura on top of her, under her, touching her, filling her, kissing her until they exhaustedly finally fell asleep tangled up in each other. That's how Jane awoke. One arm securely around Maura's waist, the other stretched out straight under Maura's head serving as a pillow with their legs in a tangled mess at the end of the bed.

Jane opened her eyes again lazily. She grinned slowly and leaned forward pressing her lips to the exposed neck in front of her lightly. She wasn't much of a cuddler, before sex, after sex, ever, at all. The idea of cuddling, of curling into another human being, was usually better than actually doing it. It was different with Maura though, it was always different with Maura.

She wondered if part of it was because Maura was also a woman. That maybe there was some level of understanding between them because they shared that in common. But she really thought it was because of their already strong, tried and true, emotional bond they had for another. They respected each other, professionally and personally, on more than just a basic human being level. They had an equal sharing of dominance, a wonderful push and pull in everything they did that also, apparently, included sex. Jane figured that was probably the biggest thing, why this, why being with Maura felt so right. She loved it. She loved every single bit of it.

She loved Maura in her arms, her bare breasts to Maura's bare back. Their arms and legs full of lax muscles, and honey and raven colored hair tangled and splashed together across the baby blue pillow case and her arm.

"Now who's the one thinking too much?" Maura's sleepy voice cut into her thoughts, bringing her back like she always did.

Jane smiled, a dopey, lopsided smile against Maura's neck. "This is nice." Her voice rumbled softly in Maura's ear.

Maura snuggled even further into the blankets, into the mattress, into Jane. "Which part?"

"All of it." She answered squeezing Maura's side with her arm. Jane laughed into her ear and Maura felt herself smiling. "Did you ever think we'd end up here?" It was a quiet thought after a quiet moment. A thought she didn't think she'd said aloud until Maura answered her.

"No."

"Do you think that if what led us here had been different we'd still end up like this?" She emphasized the question with another kiss to Maura's neck. "That this would always be our end?" She finished in a whisper directly into Maura's ear.

Maura shivered just slightly, a point Jane did not miss. "Beginning." She corrected tracing the top of the hand on her stomach with the tips of her fingers.

Jane couldn't keep the smile off of her face as she nodded into Maura's hair. "Beginning." She repeated. What she wanted to say was beginning, middle, end – all of it. Because in this moment she knew without a doubt in her mind this was where she wanted to be for the rest of…well, forever. That being with Maura was the type of relationship she'd been unknowingly waiting for her whole life. All of the bad romantic experiences, all of the near death situations, all of the bad days had led to this. To lying in bed next to the woman she loved who was also her best friend. And she couldn't find the correct words to emphatically express how amazing, and wonderful and whole it all felt. Even if she could, she knew she wouldn't. It sounded too much like a line, too much like a rehearsed notion, too much of a 'hey, we slept together and I want to do it again, so I'm going to woo you with poetry' kind of thing.

"You left me again there for a minute." Maura commented once again. Truthfully she found herself falling deeper and deeper for the woman behind her. She wanted Jane and her sometimes crazy family and the job and fights and love and kindness and warmth. She wanted all of it.

"Never." Just because Jane didn't want to wax poetically about Maura's amazingness, didn't mean she was above being cheesy. Maura laughed though and if there was a way to bottle sound Jane was sure she could make a fortune selling bottled Maura laughs because it was the best sound Jane ever heard. And then _she _laughed because it was another silly idea, a stupid idea and Jane found herself dangerously close to saying those three words and she didn't know what was stopping her from saying them but she buried her face once more into Maura's neck and hair inhaling through her nose the scent of sweat, and hours old perfume, and Maura.

"To answer your question," Maura started a smile plastered on her face. (How was she ever going to get through court later?) "It's impossible to know, that if under a different set of circumstances we would have eventually gotten here. But," She grabbed the hand she'd been tracing and brought it to her lips briefly before lacing their fingers together. "We're here now and I think that's all that we really need to take into account. I don't like what if scenarios."

"I'm glad we're here too." Jane said quietly. A comfortable silence fell over them as they laid in the bed together. Jane tried to move her right arm only to have it blocked by Maura's head still resting across her. Her whole arm was numb and her hand was starting to hurt from the lack of blood flow. "Maur?"

"Hmm?"

"Can I have my arm back?"

Maura furrowed her eyebrows before she felt Jane's arm moving underneath her head. "Oh! Of course." She sat up holding the sheet to her chest to cover up. Jane was momentarily stunned into stillness just by watching Maura's back muscles flex as she sat up. Her alarm went off though jarring her from staring. Maura reached over and turned it off while Jane shook out her right arm to get the blood flowing again. Maura yawned and looked at Jane who was still on her back, the blanket _almost _not covering what it should. She licked her lips and turned away lest she get distracted. "We should get up." She said softly not wanting to at all.

"Do we have to?" Jane whined. "I'd much rather spend my day in bed with you."

Maura smiled at her, practically beamed even. "I'd much rather too, unfortunately," She turned away from Jane and dug in the nightstand drawer for the pajamas she knew were in there. "I have court today and I have to go deal with my parents." She pulled the silk shirt over her head before turning towards Jane. She kissed the detective on the temple and whispered, "I'm going to take a shower."

Jane nodded as Maura stood. "Don't use all the hot water!" She shouted at her retreating form.

…

Maura walked out of Jane's bedroom greeted by the smell of bacon and eggs. Her hair was slightly damp and she was wearing a pair of Jane's sweatpants and a faded black BPD tee shirt. She had her outfit for court already picked out and waiting for her at home so she saw no need to dress appropriately until then. Jane on the other hand was wearing a black tank top and boxer shorts. She walked up behind her girlfriend with a grin on her face. She got up on the tips of her toes to whisper into Jane's ear. "Shower's all yours."

Jane nodded as she grabbed a plate already made from on top of the stove. "And breakfast is served." She said putting the plate on the table. Maura leaned in to kiss her but Jane turned her head at the last second making Maura kiss her cheek instead. "I haven't brushed my teeth yet."

Maura rolled her eyes. "I don't mind."

Jane laughed. "Give me a second."

Maura nodded. While Jane was gone she set Jane's plate of food in front of hers at the small kitchen table. She made herself a cup of coffee and refilled Jane's mug. Just as she was sitting down Jane came back in. She grabbed Maura's chin turning her head to face hers and captured her lips in a long, slow kiss.

When the need for real oxygen was too great they both pulled away. Jane had a smirk on her face as she sat in her chair. "Good morning."

Maura shook her head, a small smile playing on her lips. "Good morning, indeed." Midway through their breakfast Maura looked at Jane, an idea forming in her head. "My parents are leaving town tonight." Jane nearly choked on the sip of coffee from that was in her mouth. "Are you okay?"

Jane nodded her head clearing her throat a blush encasing her features. "Yeah, I just…That sounded dirty."

Maura furrowed her eyebrows as that completely confused and absolutely adorable look crossed her face. "It wasn't meant to."

"In high school saying 'my parents are going out of town' usually led to things that would get you in trouble." Maura still looked confused. Jane shook her head. Maura probably never had that experience. "Is that your way of asking me to come over tonight?" She asked with a cocky grin.

"Maybe." Maura replied playfully finishing off the rest of her breakfast and taking a sip of coffee.

"Well, consider that maybe a yes and I'll be there."

"I'll order pizza, since you missed yours last night. We could watch a movie, you could bring Jo, something to wear to work in the morning." Maura trailed off into her coffee cup as she took another drink.

Jane finished off her eggs and bacon. "Sounds like a fun date."

"I can't tell if you're being facetious or not."

"Not." Jane said with a click of her tongue and her index finger pointed at Maura. "Definitely not. It sounds nice."

Maura smiled broadly. She looked at her watch. "You should take a shower and get ready. I'll clean up." She stood grabbing both of their empty plates. She kissed the top of Jane's head. "I'll see you tonight." She whispered into raven hair.

…

Maura unlocked her door and walked inside her home still wearing Jane's clothes. She wasn't expecting her father to be sitting in her kitchen or her mother walking down the hall at such an early hour. Every nerve ending, every molecule in her body was telling her to run, to just go back to Jane's. That was ill thought out idea and she didn't have an outfit suitable for court at the detective's apartment. She took a deep breath and a determined step forward.

Peter raised an eyebrow at his wife who was standing in front of him sipping from her coffee mug. A smirk played on his lips just underneath his salt and pepper mustache. Never in his life had he seen his daughter do the walk of shame and he found it utterly hilarious. "Have a nice night?" He couldn't help but ask. Constance gave him a knowing look and he shrugged his shoulder helplessly a smile on his face.

Maura only nodded her head before hightailing it to her bedroom. Once in the safety of her room she let her mind wander to the nice night she did indeed have.

Sex with Jane was everything she thought it would be and more. It wasn't perfect. She laughed as she got ready just thinking about how imperfect it actually was. There were moments when a soft touch or a graze sent the other into a fit of hysterics because of a previously unknown ticklish spot. There were things that worked for her that didn't work for Jane and vice versa. Then there was that one moment where they had run out of bed and nearly both toppled to the floor. Their hands bumped a lot, Jane being left handed and Maura being right handed did present some difficulties. There was a lot of laughing, a lot of smiling, and, Maura pondered with a blush, a lot of other things too. As first times went it wasn't terrible, it was actually pretty amazing. Taking part in such an intimate act with Jane, being able to see her completely fall apart in her arms by her hand was absolutely exhilarating. The prospect of doing it again, over and over and over, the thought of having the opportunity to memorize every single thing about Jane's body sent a thrill to her brain and chills up and down her spine.

Maura looked at herself in the mirror. The mascara stick she was holding was suspended in midair, with her mouth hanging just slightly open. She shook her head at herself. She needed to focus, to get ready or she was going to be late.

…

Maura was in court and Jane was playing trashketball with Frost when she got a page from the desk officer downstairs saying that her father was there. She thought maybe he was there to apologize for his behavior from the last time she'd seen him. She thought maybe he had finally come back to his senses. With those thoughts in mind she made her way downstairs to see the man who she shared many things with including her last name.

He stood there looking at the wall of memorial full of the names of all of the fallen officers of the Boston Police Department. She wondered if he thought what she did every time she looked at the wall: That she was lucky, very lucky, her name wasn't engraved on there somewhere. "Hey, Pop."

He turned to her barely forcing himself to crack even a hint of a smile. He looked sad, his eyes were darker than she remembered. His face was more sunken as he looked years older than he actually was. "Hey, Janie. You…You want to grab a bite to eat?"

She nodded her head. "Yeah, sure Pop." They walked to a diner just down the block. Jane couldn't remember the last time she'd walked with her dad anywhere. She must have been nine maybe younger. She could remember the time they made it to a Sox game. Their car was in the shop so they had to take the bus to the train station and walk the couple blocks to Fenway.

They were a ragtag clan, all decked out in Red Sox red, even her mother was coerced into joining them. Tommy was on their dad's shoulders and Frankie was holding their mom's hand while Jane, the oldest, walked ahead practically skipping all short and stocky with a red cap shoved over her mess of black hair. Her dad would randomly ask for some obscure Red Sox fact or for a stat of a certain player's. It was a competition to see which Rizzoli could shout out the answer first.

But now they stood their heads level with each other, her loping stride matching his. There was no Red Sox red, no hand holding or goofy, toothy grins after a correctly shouted answer. Instead there was strained silence, tired eyes, stiff hands shoved into pockets. So much had changed. So much was different with both of them. She wasn't his little girl anymore and he, he wasn't her idol. They were just two people, two grown people who shared a past.

…

Jane sat across from her dad. He had a soda and burger. She was drinking a glass of water and eating a salad. Maura would've been proud. There was a tension hanging over them. Jane had a strong feeling that she wasn't going to like whatever he had to say. She was too blinded by her own hope that she neglected that feeling but it was there in spades the second they sat down and he'd asked for a beer only to have the waitress say they didn't serve beer.

She wanted an apology. She wanted him to say he was sorry for acting the way he did. She wanted him to say he loved her, that he loved all of them, that he loved her mother once too. She wanted that 'mommy and daddy don't get along anymore; sometimes people stop loving each other' talk that kids always got when their parents got divorced. Because what she got was a slap in the face after she nearly died and another slap in the face after she nearly lost her best friend and the slaps just kept coming.

Instead they talked about sports. Sport was always their default topic of conversation. When Jane had come home with busted knuckles and Angela sent Frank to deal with her they talked about sports, boxing specifically and martial arts and Jackie Chan and Bruce Lee. They talked about sports when she got her first boyfriend. _Remember, Janie don't let him treat you the way a Yankees fan treats a Sox fan. Don't let _anyone _treat you less than you deserve. _It was sports when that boy broke her heart. It was sports when she graduated high school, junior college, and joined the force. Sports stats every time she found herself laid up in a hospital bed broken in a new place. Sports when she, when he, when they, didn't have anything else to lean on. It was always sports.

So it didn't surprise her when they ended up talking about sports. They went through all of the Boston sport teams, all the rival teams. He had a few fries left on his plate and her salad was finished. They were just arguing over the designated hitter in baseball (they _always _argued over the designated hitter) when he interjected non-sport talk into the fray randomly like he'd always done. "Your mother told me you're dating someone."

Jane couldn't help the grin that formed across her face. She couldn't remember the last time she was that happy at just the mention of her dating life, when she was that happy period. "Yeah I am."

"Who is it?" He said gravelly. "Must be pretty important to get you like a giddy school girl."

Her smile slowly faded as a weight settled in her stomach. Something didn't feel right. He wasn't joking. He wasn't toying with her. The thing about her dad, was that when he was angry he always, _always _gave her just enough rope to hang herself with. "Do you remember Dr. Isles? I'm dating –"

"My daughter is dating a woman, is what I hear." He said candidly taking a bite out of a fry.

"I – yes." She stammered.

"So what? Dad leaves the house and you think all men suck or something?" He wasn't shouting, he was never a shouter unless it was with Angela. He was speaking with that same deadly serious, grave tone that always sent chills up her spine. Jane was stunned into silence. "You just haven't found the right man yet. You need to get over this nonsense."

Jane furrowed her eyebrows, her eyes burning through the emotion she was holding back. "What?" It was the only word she could squeak out, the only word running through her mind, the only one she could see through all of the chaos.

"It's wrong." He insisted.

"No." Jane's voice was hard, her gaze withering as she leaned across the table. "You know what's wrong? Killing people. So please, if you're going to attempt to call me out why don't you do it over the proper shit." He narrowed his eyes at her, but Jane kept talking. "I've done a lot of bad things, I've seen a lot of bad things, but Maura? Being with Maura is one of the best things I've ever chosen to do in my entire life. Besides you left us. You gave up your say in my life a long time ago."

"You just haven't found the right guy yet." Frank insisted ignoring her dig at him.

Jane ground her teeth together. "I love her." It was the first time she'd said those words out loud to anyone. She hated that they got their debut in such a terrible manner.

He rolled her eyes. "You just think you do."

"I love her." Jane repeated, stronger that time. "And I'm happy. That's good enough for Ma, it should be good enough for you."

Frank stood from his chair. He pointed a finger at her. "This isn't who I raised you to be!" He almost shouted. People were staring but neither Rizzoli seemed to care.

Shock enveloped Jane's face for a just barely visible second before she quickly covered it up. She stood slowly from her chair. "You're not who I thought you were either." She threw some cash onto the table. "I guess we're both disappointed."

"Don't you walk away from me!" She heard her dad shout but Jane kept walking, keeping herself on a fine line of passivity.

She remembered once when she was ten and Tommy was six he'd fallen off his bike and scraped his knee. She heard her dad talk, words soft and soothing to Tommy while Angela fussed around for a band aid and Neosporin. He was crying. There was nothing Angela could say to make him stop. But Frank, the owner of a 'Number One Dad!' coffee mug, held his little hand and looked him in the eye. "You're a Rizzoli," He said as if that made all the difference in the world. "We're tough guys, are you a tough boy Tommy?" Jane remembered seeing from her spot on the stairs how Tommy sat straighter, how he wiped his face with the back of his hand and nodded vehemently.

That moment always stuck in her head. From then on she wanted to prove that she was tough, tougher than anyone. And even at thirty-five she held onto that, she held it tight to her chest in an iron clad fist. It was with that thought that she was able to walk out of the diner. She kept her chin up, her shoulders back, her head high as she left her childhood hero behind stammering and fuming.

With each step she felt the tether connecting herself to her father getting pulled tighter and tighter until it snapped completely. If she were being honest, her hopes for an apology were ill placed anyway. She should've never expected anything. Never growing up had he ever apologized first. But still she hadn't expected his words, hadn't expected it to hurt that much.

She walked back to the precinct and got into her unmarked. She sent a text to Korsak telling him she was taking the rest of the day as a personal day and shut off her phone. She turned the key and drove.

…

Maura stood in the lobby of the Logan Airport with her mother. Her father was talking with someone about their boarding passes and taking care of other arrangements, leaving just the two of them together. She always found herself more comfortable around her father. He was intimidating in his own right, but he smiled more than her mother, lately though that was changing. Her mother glanced at her. "I'm glad you've found happiness and true love with Jane. She's a remarkable woman." Constance said breaking into Maura's thoughts.

Maura blinked. Even after the dreadful court appearance she couldn't keep the smile from her face. Every time she thought about the amount of paperwork waiting for her at her desk, and how it was only Wednesday she found herself smiling. Because regardless of all of those things she was going to see Jane later that night. And of course her artistic mother noticed, of course she saw there was nothing but absolute love between her and Jane. Maura was determined now, more than ever, to tell Jane. She was going to say those words over pizza and beer and a movie.

True love, the love of her life, so in love it felt like she took some kind of substance, she'd felt those things for other people and although they were true at the time what she felt for Jane seemed to surpass them. She felt all of those things and more for the obsidian haired, lanky, sarcastic detective. Her mother had never showed outright approval of anyone she dated had said she accepted Jane. She didn't know she needed it until she got it. "Thank you." Maura finally replied genuinely.

"I don't think I've told you enough but I'm very, very proud of who you are. I love you very, very much. I wish I could say I had a hand in helping you become who you are."

Maura couldn't help the tears welling in her eyes or the urge to wrap her arms around her mother. She put her arms tentatively around her mother's shoulders before the older woman pulled her into a real hug. Maura felt something fall into place as her mother wrapped her in her arms, like their family had been not what it could've been and suddenly it was. It was what she wanted but didn't know what to ask for when she was a little girl, the verbal affirmation that she was loved and they were proud of her. It made all the difference in the world in that moment in the airport. "I love you too, mom. You did have a hand in my upbringing." Constance held her tighter at those words. When her father came back he handed her his handkerchief and told her the same thing her mother did. She hugged him too and told them both she loved them.

Maura got back to her car feeling significantly emotionally lighter than she could ever remember feeling. Her mother was going to call when they landed and there was talk about Thanksgiving and other holidays as well. The 'who could care less' game ended completely by the end of their stay. It was going to be hard, to rebuild the relationship she had with her parents, but all parties involved wanted to put in the work. In the end, Maura knew, it would be worth it. She had the biggest smile on her face as she grabbed her phone from the glove box and turned it on. She wanted to tell Jane, to thank her, to hug her, hold her, kiss her senseless. Jane should've been home from work by then, she thought maybe they could start their night early. She dialed Jane's number only to get her voicemail. After two tries she thought Jane was in the shower or something. She put the phone away and started her drive home.

…

Korsak sat in the stands as he watched Jane slug ball after ball with the bat in a stance her dad probably taught her. He shook his head. "You going to talk to me?" He asked walking towards the fence. He knew it was just wasted breath. He already knew the answer. "I haven't told your mom about you skipping out early or Frank." He tried again. The only answer he got in return was the whiff of the bat swinging through air, a swing and a miss. It told him she was listening. "I'm guessing there's a correlation in there somewhere." Ball to bat, but he kept talking. "For someone who claims she doesn't run from anything, you sure run do a lot of it." He watched as Jane readjusted her stance. He searched his brain for something, anything really, to say that would make it better. There wasn't much he could come up with. He wasn't good at this stuff. "Look whatever your dad said to you, he doesn't –"

"I don't need you to be my dad!" Jane threw the bat down and tossed her blazer with it causing a cloud of dust to cough up from the earth. "Sergeant," She emphasized the title making sure he knew what his role in her life was. "I'll make up my halfday on Saturday and I'll go home when I damn well please."

Korsak took a step back. He had been Jane's mentor for a long time. He could read her like a book. He knew she was locked. She could play poker with the best of them. He always joked that it was a good thing she was on the right side of the law because if it was the other way around she would've been a hell of a shell to crack. Pushing her only made it worse. He sighed roughly. "She loves you and she's sitting at home waiting for you, just remember that." He didn't half to emphasize the 'she' he was speaking about. Jane knew it wasn't her mother on his mind.

"I know!" Jane shouted her voice seemed to reverberate around the empty park. She kicked her foot in the dirt still not crying because she was tough. She stalked up to the machine putting more money in. She heard Korsak start his car, she heard him idle before he backed out and left. She didn't need him, just like she didn't need her dad. Her face screwed up at the thought.

Angrily she picked up the bat again getting into the perfect stance. She remembered when her dad taught her how to stand at home plate, bat in hand. She remembered his voice so clear and rough, a little like hers, as he fixed the position of her hands and angled her hips the right way. She was only playing tee ball at the time but she remembered his hands over hers as she hit the ball off the tee. He cheered and spun her around in a circle before they did it again and again, until she could do it on her own. That was her life for years. Everything she ever did was to make her dad proud, to feel him wrap his strong arms around her and whisper in her ear _I'm proud of you, kid._

He was always the voice of reason. He was the strong and steady one while their mother went into hysterics over each and every crisis that landed in the Rizzoli house. He was always there, her knight in shining armor. But when he asked her mother for an annulment all those months ago, when he said those things to her in that diner, it all shattered into tiny little pieces around her. It was like finding out superman was just a guy who was off his meds dressed in his mother's curtains, and she'd been fooled by the stupid act the whole time.

…

She didn't know how long she stood and pounded ball after ball into the air. It was long enough for the sun to go down, for the air to cool, for the pent up anger to disappear. The sweat on her skin made her suit shirt stick to her body, making her cold all over. Her pants rubbed awkwardly against her thighs and her feet were sore. Her boots were not made for hours of baseball and her hands were red and raw from too many hours with a wooden bat. The break in her relationship with her father had started a long time ago. She didn't know which was worse, the slow breaking of a solid relationship or if it would've been instantaneous. She thought it might've hurt worse if it had come with no warning. She grabbed her blazer from the ground and put the bat she was using away. She sat in the driver's side seat for a few minutes before starting the car.

When she got to her destination she hit the doorbell once then twice. In the middle of her third time the door frantically swung open. "Jane?" Jane hardly registered Maura's voice. Without skipping a beat she lunged forward kissing her girlfriend soundly on the lips and stumbled the few steps inside the warm, safe, house. When she pulled away her eyes found soft, steady hazel eyes in front of her. Maura was always her solid ground when she felt herself drifting. "He's my dad and he told me this is wrong." Jane mumbled never breaking eye contact with Maura. "He said this isn't who he raised me to be." She couldn't help the small whimper that escaped her mouth. Because that was the one that hurt. Out of everything that sentence was the one that pulled the rug out from under her feet. She closed her eyes for a moment taking in a deep breath before looking back at Maura. "But I don't care, Maura." Her voice grew stronger even though her chest hurt. "This," She pointed to the ground, where their feet were only inches apart. "This is where I stand." She nodded strongly. Her eyes went back to Maura's and held. "You're it, Maura, and I," Another deep breath. "I freaking love you."

The second the words came out of Jane's mouth Maura launched herself forward wrapping her arms around Jane's strong shoulders. She buried her face in the crook of Jane's neck. Jane stumbled backward her back hitting the side of the doorframe. She wrapped her arms around Maura pulling her closer. After a few seconds Maura finally pulled away. She wiped at the tears from Jane's cheeks with her thumbs and looked her straight in the eye. "I love you, Jane." She brought her lips to Jane's in what she hoped was a searing kiss. "I love you." She smiled as she said the words a second time, bringing her lips to Jane's again. She buried her head in Jane's neck. "You need a shower." She laughed into sweaty skin, but made no point to move away.

Jane laughed her arms still strongly wrapped around Maura's slim body. "Yeah well that's what hours at the batting cage does to you." Jane wiped her eyes with her hand not knowing exactly _when _she started crying but hoping she was finished.

Maura shut the front door and locked it. She held Jane's hand as she led her upstairs. Maura was just going to leave Jane to shower on her own. She was going to wait in the bedroom for the detective to come out of the shower and if Jane needed to be held, or a shoulder to cry on she would be there. What she hadn't counted on though was Jane grabbing her wrist to stop her from leaving. She took one look at Jane's raised eyebrow in question, the quick dart of brown eyes to the shower and back at her, the almost grin on her face. "You're emotional." Both eyebrows shot up. "I don't want to take advantage."

Jane nearly laughed. "Maura," Her dad's words hurt and the sting would probably be there for a while. But she and Maura were finally alone, no parents, no interruptions, no stupid events with stupid people to attend. It was just the two of them. She loved Maura and Maura loved her. And Maura had inadvertently promised her a great night that morning over breakfast. Jane wanted to cash in on it. She wanted to memorize every inch of Maura's body. She wanted to explore and discover every bit of her toned, pale skin. She wasn't going to let her ass of a father ruin her evening. "Just because today thoroughly sucked, doesn't mean tonight has to." Jane could tell Maura was about to cave and just to be sure she pulled the wrist still in her hand and brought her in for a kiss. And then Jane knew she had her absolutely convinced.

Clothes were shed in such a furry Jane was surprised nothing got ripped. Before she knew it water was hitting them, simultaneously cooling them off and heating them up. Jane's lips moved slowly, roughly, passionately against Maura's and Maura was giving just as good as she got. Maura's gasp was muffled by Jane's lips when her hand trailed over smooth, slick skin. Her hand moved with diligence downward stopping periodically along the way, trying to commit all the sounds the woman under her was making to memory. Finally, her hand reached the spot Maura needed her most. "I love you." Jane murmured against Maura's neck. Maura felt like she was going to explode from all of the heat seemingly trapped inside her body. When it finally hit her she bit into Jane's shoulder and let out a muffled low groan. As she came down from her high she could hear Jane's voice in her ear telling her 'I love you' over and over like she couldn't say it enough, like it'd been trapped inside her for too long and now that it was out she needed to release it. Jane removed her hand and traced the outside of Maura's hip resting her forehead against Maura's a wide smile on her face.

After recovering Maura brought Jane in for a long kiss and pushed her up against the wall. She nodded into the kiss. "I love you." She repeated and kept repeating, just as Jane had. She repeated them as her lips trailed over smooth tan skin, over a rough scar. She repeated them when Jane came undone in her arms her name rolling off the tip of her tongue. She not only wanted Jane to know, she wanted her to feel it. She wanted the words to wrap around her being, encase her in warmth and love and commitment. She wanted Jane to know that this was where she stood too, that Jane was everything to her and more. She wanted her to feel all the things she couldn't find the words to say.

As they laid in bed together hours later in a tangled mess of limbs and hair and twisted cloth, Maura realized showering together probably wasn't that conducive to actually getting clean. But, she was holding a smiling, sleeping Jane which on any given day was infinitely better than the opposite. She kissed Jane's temple one last time and draped her leg over Jane's hip. "I love you." She said once again.

She did. She loved every hair on Jane Clementine Rizzoli's head, every cell in her body. They would deal with Angela in the morning, they would deal with the residual effects of what Frank Rizzoli had said, but right at that moment they had each other. Maura didn't want to be anywhere else. They were Rizzoli and Isles, a pair, partners in solving crime, partners in life, in everything. They would deal with whatever came next as they always did, together.

* * *

**A/N: **Epilogue thingy is halfway written.

Thanks for reading!


	27. The End (Epilogue)

**Disclaimer: **Don't own. No money. ETC.

* * *

Maura Isles uncharacteristically fell onto the hotel bed fully clothed with a heavy sigh. Of course she didn't stay there very long for fear she'd wrinkle her dress but she did indulge herself in childlike petulance for a moment before rising to her feet to change and unpack.

She'd gotten a call the day before from the FBI. They needed her to consult on a case for them and she'd be gone for the foreseeable future. They had said it shouldn't take more than two weeks but she didn't always trust the FBI's timetable. She was in Washington DC and Jane was in Boston. She didn't want to be there. The hotel room was too empty, the bed too big, the whole space too quiet and far too lonely. Maura wouldn't have been so up in arms about it if it hadn't cut into her plans.

It had been three weeks since that first night together, since they confessed their love for each other and Maura had grown accustomed to Jane's near constant presence. They argued over little things like instant coffee and vegetables with dinner, but rarely was it anything tremendously life altering. Jane had spent so many nights at her house that Jo Friday and Watson, the baby tortoise, had taken up permanent residency in the house as well. They'd even installed a doggie door for Jo. The detective had a steadily growing collection of clothing accumulating in Maura's bedroom, a room Maura now thought of as their bedroom, their bed. Jane was everywhere in her house. Her shoes were by the door, her toothbrush in the bathroom, Lucky Charms and Coco Puffs and instant coffee in the kitchen.

Maura had a flashback to the moment so many months ago when it was Jane's apartment she was asked to analyze, when Jane asked that 'why aren't we dating' question. Back when they were only best friends, when the idea of dating Jane was just starting to occur to her, she didn't see it in Jane's apartment but she saw it in her house. She saw it everywhere she looked. She noticed it when Jane wasn't there, when they were sleeping in different beds. Something as simple as left handed scissors left her feeling at home and safe, knowing that Jane was in every inch of her house, their house, their home. Everything about it just felt right. There was no other way to describe it.

But of course they both avoided asking the question, they skirted around the issue like they skirted around everything. She didn't know why they had a need to do this, no idea why they were making it such a big deal by trying to not make it a big deal. But Maura had been determined to change that.

It was Angela, Jane's mother. The woman had been popping in and out of her house more so than normal and like moving in together, they avoided that conversation too.

Angela's intrusion upon her house was beginning to be too much for Maura to handle. She never had the type of parental supervision in which parents were constantly bumping into her life, cooking her dinner and breakfast, and telling her what to do or what she should wear. Not that Angela was doing all of those things per se but it just wasn't something she was used to. And as the days wore on she found herself growing tired of the early morning intrusions, especially on the particular mornings where Jane had spent the night and was lying naked next to her on the bed. She knew in Angela's heart that her intentions were pure, but she missed having her mornings alone with Jane or even just alone with Bass. She wanted to walk around the house in nothing but her underwear and Jane's shirt. It was never even a thing she wanted in her life but she found herself wanting it with Jane. She found herself wanting a lot of things with Jane.

She didn't want to have to worry about waking up extra early to beat Angela to her living room so she could pick up all of the discarded clothing from the night before. When she voiced this to Jane the brunette laughed and said "Welcome to my world." She'd told her to just leave the clothes out there, it was her house. It might even teach her mother not to walk in so early if she did end up seeing something she ought not to have. Maura did not understand Jane's passivity to such a private topic. She'd thought the detective would be butting her mother out, would've been just as upset about it. But Jane grew up with Angela Rizzoli, so she was used to the butting in.

Her plan was, she had thought anyway, completely foolproof. She was going to hit both issues in one swing. She had an entire weekend planned to butter up Jane to the idea of living together. It was going to be a whole weekend of sports and unhealthy food and Jane's favorite beer. She even bought tickets to the Red Sox game that was happening at that very moment. Then Sunday she was going to ask the question and they would set up rules and boundaries. It was supposed to be flawless. Except, because there was always an opposition to any solid plan, the FBI called requesting her presence. She then found herself on a plane to Washington DC while Jane was getting ready for a Red Sox game with Frankie.

Maura sighed before turning off the main light and pulling down the blankets on the overly large bed. She sat so she was leaning against the headboard and turned on the lamp by the bed. She spread the contents of the case file she'd been handed across the bed. She began reading and making her own notes on a note pad. Work always helped clear her mind and the faster she could help the FBI the faster she'd be back home.

After she'd written about a page of notes about the deaths she was supposed to be investigating her phone buzzed beside her. It was a text from Jane. Immediately she could feel her lips curl into a smile. She sat back rubbing her eyes before reading the message. _Still at game. Korsak sent me this though. That was a fun night, huh? ;) Miss you and love you! _

Attached was a picture of the two of them. It was from the weekend before, after the championship touch football game. All of the different units played multiple games against each other until it was between the homicide unit and the drug unit. It always seemed to be between the homicide unit and the drug unit. There was a friendly rivalry between the two, Maura guessed, because many of the detectives in the homicide unit transferred from the drug unit and a few the other way around.

It was a terrible day for sports or any outdoor activity. It was cold and rainy. The 'field' was covered in slick mud and standing water. It was a mess, but it was also the most fun Maura could remember having in a long time. The game went back and forth for a while like good rivalry games did, when both teams were tied with one goal to win the whole thing the rain picked up, the sunlight was virtually gone with dark gray clouds taking its place, and the field conditions were just getting worse and worse. But both teams kept pushing each other, pushing for the win. It was remarkable, really. Maura had never been on such a team style sport or participated in such. It was exhilarating to be a part of that, to see the detectives which she worked with and those she didn't smiling and laughing and smirking as they all slipped in the mud and missed a few catches because the ball was slick. Playing in the rain seemed to bring out everyone's childish sides. It was a nice change of pace.

In the end, homicide, of course, won the game off a Korsak fake to Frost and a Frankie touch down. They all went to the Dirty Robber afterwards. Maura had been reluctant to go without changing but somehow Jane talked her into it. All she could recall was a look on Jane's face that was very similar to Jo Friday's when she wanted a treat, Jane's soft brown eyes and the way her bottom lip slightly stuck out left her with no choice but to step into the bar drenched in rain water and covered in mud. And now that one moment was evidenced clearly in picture format, but she didn't mind.

At the Robber Frankie and Frost had presented her with a silk sash with the words 'Rookie of The Year' on it and a plastic tiara. (She ended up scoring several touchdowns for homicide during their time playing.) There was clapping and cheers throughout the bar that only grew when the captain of the drug unit team presented Jane a small trophy and a slight bow. Maura wasn't quite sure how it happened but the trophy was filled with champagne. She and Jane both drank from it before Jane passed the trophy to Frost. Before Maura knew it Jane had her arms around her waist, her feet left the ground and Jane's lips were on hers right there in the middle of The Robber in front of all of their friends and coworkers. That was the picture Korsak had taken.

Maura touched the screen with her fingers already thinking about getting it printed out and framed. For the first time in her life she had pictures that told a story, not stuffy portraits or publicity appearances. It was the type of picture they could show their children one day. (She realized she was jumping ahead a bit but she couldn't help the thought of children one day in the future with Jane.) Jane brought fun to her life and she absolutely loved her for it.

…

Two weeks, that's how long the FBI needed her around. Not only did she consult on the case but she was also asked to speak at a seminar to other pathologists. It had been an entire two weeks of federal bureaucracy and DC and an entire two weeks of playing phone tag with Jane.

Jane and Frost caught a big case and with her own business with the FBI it inevitably led to one of them calling the other while they were working or asleep. But it was all over, at least on her side. She was walking out of Logan Airport in the middle of the day lugging her suitcase behind her very tiredly. She just wanted to go home and sleep in her own bed. She looked up from the ground expecting to have to hail a cab only to find Jane standing in front of her unmarked with a cardboard sign that had POINDEXTER scrawled across it in her messy handwriting.

She stopped walking right where she was and let out a laugh. Jane was supposed to be at work, it was the middle of the day and she was in the middle of a case as far as Maura knew. But she wasn't. Jane, her Jane, was standing just a few feet in front of her with a smile as wide as she thought hers was. Why was she still standing there? She shook her head at herself and took a few quick steps forward before she fell into Jane's arms.

It didn't matter to her that Jane was obviously wearing day old clothes or that they were outside of the airport she could've fallen asleep right then and there. "I thought you were working?" Maura mumbled into Jane's shoulder.

Jane laughed pulling Maura closer to her. God, she missed her. "Just caught the guy literally an hour ago. I've worked so much overtime on this case that Cavanaugh and Korsak both literally shoved me out of the door and told me not to come back until Monday."

"So we have all weekend together?"

Jane nodded. "You'll be happy to know that everything is in tip top shape on the home front. Bass is his normal Bassy self." Maura laughed into Jane's shoulder and Jane finally felt at ease. "Watson is good and I think Jo Friday has me trained."

"Oh, dear." Maura laughed again still refusing to move her head from its perch on Jane's shoulder.

"Yeah, well _you_ say no to that puppy look of hers." Jane said. "The house is still standing and it's not a complete wreck either."

Maura finally pulled away. "I'm glad to hear it." Jane beamed at her. "I'm happier to see _you_ though." She finished with a quick peck to Jane's lips. She willed herself to step away from her detective before they got carried away. "Let's go home." Jane opened the passenger side door of the car with a flourish as she tipped an imaginary hat at Maura before grabbing the suitcase and putting it in the trunk.

…

The next morning Maura walked down the stairs in her underwear and Jane's shirt from the night before knowing full well that the banging and clanking of pots and pans downstairs meant there was full company. As soon as she reached the kitchen she felt eyes on her. For her part she kept her eyes straight forward and on the coffee machine which she noticed was whirling to life. "I'm sorry." She yawned walking towards the coffee maker. "I'm just going to get two cups of coffee and I'll be out of the way." She picked up two mugs from the cabinet before turning back to the coffee machine. She worked the machine a bit before filling the two cups with the perfect blend of coffee.

"Is Jane here?" Angela asked.

Maura poured the allocated amount of sugar in Jane's mug and stirred. "Yes, she's sleeping though." She put the spoon in the dishwasher where the other dirty dishes were.

Maura walked back into the bedroom to Jane's bare back. She grinned slyly to herself. Walking her way she set both mugs on the nightstand, on coasters of course. She perched herself with one knee on either side of Jane's hips. She brushed the other woman's hair to the side and in a feather light touch allowed her fingers to dance down the lean, sculpted musculature of her girlfriend's back. She heard a delicious sounding moan come from Jane's mouth at the touch. Maura leaned forward placing a kiss right in the square of Jane's back and again further up at the base of her neck. "Are you going to get off me so I can kiss you properly?" Jane's voice was thick and muffled by the blankets and pillow her head rested on.

Maura grinned mischievously. This morning style banter had been a kind of game she enjoyed playing. She lay down so her front was pressed into Jane's back. She moved the hair away from Jane's ear. "I quite like the view from up here." She whispered letting her hands run underneath the covers and over Jane's heated skin. "And you haven't brushed your teeth yet."

The detective groaned as the hand traveled over her body. She hated that she'd ever used that excuse before. "You're feeling frisky this morning."

Maura laughed saucily in Jane's ear loving the goosebumbs that popped up across Jane's skin at the sound. "I was gone for two weeks." She rubbed her nose along Jane's slender neck. "I missed you."

"I missed you too." Jane mumbled getting lost in all the sensations that were swarming her body.

Of course in that moment with Maura lying on top of her practically naked and she actually naked underneath, the door opened. "Hey, Ma says breakf – aaaaahhhh!" It was Frankie. Jane groaned again but that time for a totally different reason.

Maura removed her hand from where it was pressed into Jane's abdomen. "I want to change the locks."

"You want them out of the house?"

Maura nodded into her bare shoulder before she got up from the bed.

"Okay." Jane sighed before moving to a sitting position. She dug in the nightstand for her pajamas and shrugged them on before walking downstairs.

Maura stared curiously as Jane walked out of the door. It didn't occur to her to just tell Jane what she wanted until then. That was foolishness on her part. She took a drink of her coffee as she decided what to wear for the day. She was so engrossed in this she didn't hear Jane leave or come back until she heard running water in the bathroom.

Jane told her mother and her brothers that she and Maura were adults who wanted to spend time alone so could they please go to the guest house and stay there. Her mother rolled her eyes and told her all she had to do was say something and they all left for the guest house. Jane didn't know if it was too easy or if she was just being skeptical of the situation but either way she and Maura were alone, at least for the moment which was infinitely better than having one of her brothers or her mother with them. She ran her toothbrush under the tap just as Maura walked into the bathroom.

Maura looked at Jane. The way the black tank top contrasted with her olive skin tone, the way the boxers hung loose on her slender hips. "You should move in with me." The sentence just came tumbling from her mouth with no plan to back it up. Her eyes met Jane's in the mirror as thoughts began to circulate in her mind. "Your mother could move into your apartment. Or she could stay here and we can get our own place." Maura couldn't help herself and took a step forward wrapping her arms around Jane's middle and resting her head against her back. "You practically live here already." Jane tried not to choke on the toothpaste in her mouth, some of it dribbled down her chin. "But really I just want to go to sleep with you every night and wake up next to you every morning." Maura continued talking into Jane's back. "I want to make two cups of coffee and split the paper with you."

"Even if one of those cups is full of sugar and you never get to enjoy the sports section?" Jane mumbled through her mouthful of toothpaste.

Maura nodded with a slight laugh. "Especially then." She kissed Jane's bare shoulder where the tank top didn't cover.

Jane grabbed a cup and filled it with water. She rinsed out her mouth and washed out her toothbrush. She leaned into Maura's touch their eyes met in the mirror. "I love you." Jane said smiling softly.

Mara smiled back. "I'll never get tired of hearing you say that." She wrapped her arms around Jane's waist and nuzzled her face between Jane's shoulder blades. "I love you, too."

Jane maneuvered herself so she was facing Maura. "Do you mean it? You want to live together? Argue about food choices and late hours at work and…"

Maura looked at Jane seriously. "I mean every word."

Jane's smile broadened. "I want that too."

The 'really' died on Maura's lips as Jane's mouth covered her own in a heated kiss. She pushed Jane back until she was sitting on the bathroom counter. Jane wrapped her legs around Maura bringing her closer. She let out a moan as the tank top was pulled over her head and Maura's fingers danced along her skin. The last coherent thought she had was that this was what love was supposed to be.

It wasn't just about one moment or a slow burn or a raging fire. Falling for her best friend, falling for Maura, was about all those moments. It was about all those weak points where Maura was there when no one else was, when there were more bad times than good. It was about waking up and realizing how important, how ingrained Maura was to life itself. There wasn't some divine answer, or some clearly drawn out plan or blueprint for how it was supposed to go. It just happened. It happened gradually, slowly and one day it all just clicked together and no matter how Hallmark, how cheesy, how utterly cliché it sounded Jane couldn't see herself with anyone else, couldn't see a future that didn't have Maura in it. It was always supposed to be them. And that was the beautiful thing about it.

* * *

**A/N: **Well, _that_ was a commitment. Wow. I'm just going to pat myself on the back for a second for finishing this, cause good grief was this a lot of work. I first started writing this because I was going through my own 'it's complicated' (like the facebook status) with my best friend and I wanted to hit all of those things I was feeling, all those things I'm sure other people feel when they have such an important relationship on the line. Originally, the story was supposed to be darker, more complicated, with more angst, more yelling but you see how that turned out. Hah. No, but I'm happy with the way this developed and I do want to sincerely thank all of you for leaving such amazing comments and alerting/favoriting this story (and the author favorites/alerts too) and even if you just read through it, thank you for taking the time.

A couple of you have asked about a sequel. I have to say, wow you want a sequel? haha But more importantly I don't think there's going to be one. Mainly because there wouldn't really be a plot. It would just be a bunch of Rizzles fluff with no real central plotline or anything because I don't really like drama. But I do have a list of one-shots I've been wanting to write forever so you'll see more from me in the future, if you so desire.

As always, thanks for reading!


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